Reluctant

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"Everything he said was related to you." Xu Yue reached out and poked the small bonsai planted outside the window sill, "He said, you don't like sweets, so I try to avoid you when I really want to eat."

Bai Huan frowned at this moment, he suddenly remembered that when he first met that person, that person liked to eat sweet things, but ever since he once said that he didn't like sweet things...he never saw that person again eat sweets.

"He said, Bai Huan always stays up late, you remember to stop him more often, he will die when he works."

When staying up late to work, that person always soaked milk and put it in his hand and then walked out silently, because he didn't like him, so that person didn't dare to stay in his room for too long.

Then, when he opened the door early the next morning, he often found that person asleep on the floor at the door of the room.

"He said, you have to remind him regularly to review, but he always forgets when he gets busy."

Bai Huan used to stay up late and was overworked.During their fifth year of living together, Bai Huan was hospitalized due to retinal detachment.

Had a minor surgery.

It was obviously nothing serious, but that person wanted to stay with him.

He asked the man to rest on the bed next to his hospital bed. After all, the man hadn't closed his eyes for dozens of hours since he was hospitalized.

As a result, the man didn't sleep most of the night and ran to squat beside his hospital bed, took his hand, but didn't dare to use force, and gently pressed his face to his palm.

Then, with a choked voice, he said, "Baihuan...Baihuan...please don't die...please don't have an accident..."

Because he lowered his voice, his whole body kept trembling. He slightly opened his eyes to look at that person, feeling a little sad.

He treated him so badly, why didn't he leave?

Why do you have to be afraid that the sound will wake him up even when you cry?

Why, be so stupid?

Xu Yue was staring at Bai Huan when he came back to his senses.

"In the end he told me that Bai Huan is the best person in the world."

"It's not easy for him to like someone, so don't hurt him."

When Xu Yue finished speaking the last sentence, he suddenly felt a little powerless. Looking at Bai Huan's expressionless face... he thought, that person is really stupid, so stupid, how could there be such a stupid person in this world.

Bai Huan suddenly laughed, "Don't you sympathize with him?"

Xu Yue's face darkened when she heard the words, and she said after a while, "To me, he is your enemy. I can't talk about sympathy...I just feel sorry for him."

"I've always felt that although you are cold-tempered, you are not morally corrupt... Come to think of it, are you just a white-eyed wolf?" Xu Yue just felt very angry for no reason. The Bai Huan he liked shouldn't be like this.

The current Bai Huan is as cold as the permafrost that has not melted for 3000 years, he does not feel any pain or itches.

Seeing no reply for a while, Xu Yue turned around and went out the door.

Bai Huan looked at his back and said in an inaudible voice, "It's not easy to like someone... How can it be easy to like someone..."

The man did so much for him.

But he couldn't even remember that person's birthday, and he never paid attention to it.

Even the person who stood on the opposite side of that person felt distressed...

That...that person...should be...how sad...

(eleven)

"The empty pile of butterflies falling, the dark sky turning gray..." Humming along, he followed Liuliu to the overpass.

The light night sky turned red under the illusion of neon lights, and the autumn wind was slightly cool, Su She stretched out her hand and tightened her coat.

After walking for a while, Liuliu crawled at Su She's feet.

Seeing this, Su She smiled and squatted down, "What are you doing? Are you tired from walking?"

Liu Liu didn't even raise her head, her whole body curled up on Su She's feet.

"Liu Liu." Su She stroked its back.

Liuliu shrank again.

"Flow."

"Liu Liu is so cute."

Su She patted its head and sighed softly, "Are you warming my feet?"

Liuliu suddenly raised his head and groaned, then lay down again.

Su She looked up at the glamorous metropolis, then at the river in the distance, and blinked, really... a bit sour.

"Liu Liu, you must always be by my side..."

"Otherwise, I might not be able to survive the winter."

With a slight sigh, Su She hugged Liu Liu and got up and walked home.

"The walk is over, let's go take a shower next time... Liuliu don't lie down on the ground next time, it's cold." Patting a certain dog's little head, the sound of the sound in the distant urban area came from his ear.

Then, little by little, it dissipated in the wind.

……

Su She didn't eat well for several weeks, and after taking care of everything for Liuliu, Su She felt a little headache.

Also, constant burning stomach pains.

It was clearly winter season, and there was still a cool breeze blowing outside the window, but Su She was sweating profusely.

The hand covering the abdomen also gradually turned white...

My whole body hurts besides pain...

I remember when I was thrown away by Lin Xiu when I was young, I had no money and nothing to keep warm.

In the winter when it was snowing heavily, I huddled in front of a shop with lights on, thinking that I would die like this, and the more I thought about it, the more afraid I started to cry... Then the snow poured into my throat, and it was icy cold... But A way to quench my thirst.

In order to relieve the hunger, he kept grabbing the snow on the ground and stuffing it into his mouth.

Thinking I can't die, I can't die...

But what about living?

……

It's too painful to be alive.

……

Endless pain, repeated pain.

……

"Is he just having a cold? Do you need a full body checkup?" Bai Huan asked the doctor with a gentle expression while standing in front of the ward.

The doctor nodded, "Summer and autumn alternate, it's just a seasonal cold, there is no need to be hospitalized. But the young man next door wants to be hospitalized, but he refuses to live or die, and no one has a friend to take care of him."

The doctor is an old doctor who is about to retire and likes to chatter.

Bai Huan didn't feel impatient when he heard it, but instead started talking, "There are many poor people in Beijing."

"That's right. Alright, I'll get to work first." The doctor turned around and walked into another ward, with a hoarse voice coming from the wind, "Su She, right?...Come on, let me show you. "

Bai Huan paused as he was about to enter Xu Yue's ward, and frowned before entering the ward.

Xu Yue was lying on the hospital bed watching the video, her expression was a little sad.

"Yue Yue." Bai Huan poured hot water on the table and called softly.

Xu Yue looked up at him, "Huh?"

"I have something to do, I'll come pick you up later." After finishing speaking, Bai Huan tucked the quilt for him, and then walked out.

Xu Yue looked at Bai Huan's back and frowned slightly.

Did someone call Su She's name just now?

……

When I woke up, the surroundings were bright.

Thinking back, I seemed to have collapsed at home in the last second. This is a hospital.

Su She half-opened her eyes and looked at the white wall.

A nurse beside him was changing the water for him. Seeing him open his eyes, she hurriedly said, "Huh? Are you awake?"

Su She looked up at her and smiled, "Yes."

"You need to be hospitalized. Now there is only an empty ward for you temporarily. If you don't go through the hospitalization procedures, you won't be able to use the hospital bed later. What about your family?" she asked.

Hearing this, Su She was stunned for a moment, "I'm an orphan."

"Then do you have any friends?" the nurse asked.

Su She shook her head, "I'm alone."

Hearing this, the nurse looked at him in surprise, "Go to the hospital first, your diet has been unstable for a long time, and your stomach bleeding was already critical yesterday."

She spoke in a hurry.

He shook his head, "Thank you, but I can't be hospitalized."

"...I think it's best for you to be hospitalized. The stomach bleeding is so serious that it's easy to develop cancer." She was a little stunned. She had never seen such an irresponsible person? ! ...Stop eating and stay in the hospital? !

"No...thank you." Su She said with some embarrassment, and smiled slightly with her mouth bent.

……

After the nurse left, a doctor on duty came, very kind.

He asked Su She why she wasn't hospitalized.

Su She looked at the ceiling and said for a while, "I don't eat because I don't have money."

The doctor smiled after hearing this, "Young man, life in this world is difficult, but you have to live well, right? Don't talk about the money first, I will guarantee you, you live first, and you will pay me back when you have money."

Su She was quite surprised when she heard the words, she quickly shook her head and refused.

There are a lot of kind-hearted people these days, so if you can't do harm, don't do harm, lest one day you die and have not paid back the money.

The doctor sighed.

Su She lowered her eyes and stared at the white sheets.

In fact, it doesn't matter if you don't go to the hospital. From childhood to adulthood, I just endured it and passed it.

I'm used to it, and it's fine to bear it when it hurts.

"Doctor, go through the hospitalization procedures for him." Hearing a cold sentence while in a trance, Su She felt that all the cells in his body froze, and it was undoubtedly cold.

The doctor turned around, and when he saw Bai Huan, he immediately smiled, "Yo, you know him? Boy Bai is rich."

Bai Huan nodded lightly and did not speak.

Su She looked at him, thinking that if someone pays me, why not do it...

"...Doctor, write an IOU for me... When I have money, I will pay it back to Mr. Bai."

But how can I owe him anything.

After hearing this, the doctor went to write an order. Bai Huan's face darkened when he heard this, and he stepped forward and stood by Su She's hand, "Why did you do this?"

Su She looked up at him, watching him looking at herself from above.

Smiling softly, "It's just a stomach problem, who knew that the pain was so severe that I fell to the ground."

He was slightly stunned, and looked at Su She in disbelief, "When did you have stomach problems?"

Su She smiled brighter after hearing this.

I really want to roll my eyes at the two of them, and then poke his heart and ask him if he was alive or dead during those six years?

"I've had it since I was a child." But I still can't lose my temper, he is Bai Huan.

After hearing this, Bai Huan's expression was a little strange, and he probably realized that he never cared about it.