Reluctant

In the two months since he was hospitalized... Bai Huan has been by his side all the time, never leaving him.

In heat...cough...

"...Do you want to do that?" Su She blushed and asked with some embarrassment.

In the end, Bai Huan slapped him on the back of the head.

The white beauty frowned and muttered, "Are you sincere?"

"Huh?" Su She blinked.

Bai Huan wished he could take a handkerchief and bite it twice, he really didn't understand why Su She was so dumb.

After being silent for a while, Bai Huan suddenly sighed, "There will be a lot of days in the future, let's talk about it after you recover..."

When you are well, don't even think about running away.Bai Huan thought to himself.

Su She nodded, but didn't think about Bai Huan's expression.

"Do you want to find someone to solve it?" Su She asked again after a while.

Bai Huan's face was broken on the spot, he was telling him to go out and find someone else to sleep with.

"...Did I ever say I like you?"

Su She nodded, "...but the two are irrelevant."

Bai Huan slapped him again, it wasn't heavy, it was so light that he didn't feel it.

"Didn't you say that lovers should be loyal? I can't stand this, how can I have a happy sex life in the future." Bai Huan said seriously with a serious expression on his face.

But I didn't want Su She to be taken aback, stared at it for a while before saying in a muffled voice, "Your mouth is like eating a big white rabbit, why is it so sweet..."

Even if you go out for a walk, you make me dizzy.

Bai Huan hummed, and shook their hands again.

"Su She." He called out his name.

Su She looked at him, "Huh?"

"You have to live well." Bai Huan said softly.

Under the dim light, his eyes flickered faintly.

"I can't live without you."

The clear and light words drifted away with the evening wind, and Su She looked at the gray sky in the distance.

He responded softly, "Okay."

(36)

"The situation is not good? ... What is not good?"

Lin An stared at Bai Huan in a daze, and the doctor standing aside who was explaining Su She's condition took a step back when he saw Bai Huan's expression.

Bai Huan looked at him expressionlessly.

"...Mr. Su has not been hospitalized before, which delayed his illness. In addition, his physical fitness is poor and his blood disease is serious... Now he has not been able to find a bone marrow transplant... I guess..." The doctor adjusted his glasses and said carefully.

"What do you think?" Lin An asked.

Seeing that it was Lin An who spoke, the doctor let out a long breath and said softly, "I guess I won't survive this winter."

……

Lin An handed Bai Huan a cup of hot water, lowered his eyebrows, and sighed, "Don't be sad, Xiao She's illness is really incurable."

Holding the water glass, Bai Huan looked up at Lin An, frowned and asked, "You don't want him to live?"

Lin An paused for cleaning the table, looked at Bai Huan and suddenly chuckled, "You are so pathetic."

After listening to it, Bai Huan remained expressionless.

"If it's true, you really don't have the right to take care of Su She."

Lin An smiled, took the sprinkler at hand and went to the balcony to water it.

Bai Huan paused for a few seconds, then pursed his lips.

"Why do you look like he can't die now? Just because of your liking?"

"It's ridiculous. After all these years, I treat him better than you treat him." Lin An said again.

Bai Huan's face turned pale instantly, but he remained silent.

Seeing this, Lin An couldn't bear it, and remained silent for a long time.

Bai Huan was about to get up when Lin An called him.

Bai Huan turned his head, "Xiao An?"

Lin An felt sore and almost cried, his voice choked up, "Su She said, he doesn't want to live."

……

boom--

The sound of a glass of water falling to the ground.

Lightly crunchy and crispy.

Lin An looked at Bai Huan's slightly trembling hands, part of his throat was choked up, and he said in a low voice, "...you treat him well, don't let him have such thoughts again."

Bai Huan looked at him, and it took him a long time to ask, "Why doesn't he want to live?"

……

The one who clearly agreed not to leave, the one who agreed to stay with me all the time, and the one who agreed to work hard to persevere.

Why... don't want to live?

Bai Huan walked into the ward quickly with some unsteady steps. Su She was eating sweets, so he glanced at Bai Huan.

Bai Huan reached out to hug him.

Being hugged suddenly by Bai Huan, the kind of hug that seemed to strangle him to death was so strong.

As a result, Su She choked on sugar.

"Ahem...you...let go...cough..." Su She pushed him, coughing followed, the coughing was so uncomfortable that even tears fell down.

Bai Huan immediately let go of his hand when he heard it, and stood at the end of the bed with his head down.

Su She coughed for a while and finally spit out the candy, and then she recovered, looking at Bai Huan's silence, she was a little puzzled, "Why are you hugging me all of a sudden?"

Bai Huan raised his head, his gaze was like a torch.

The expression was calm, but the voice that came out was trembling, "Xiao An said, you don't want to live."

Su She was stunned for a moment, unable to react for a while, "...When did I say..."

The voice stopped abruptly, and Su She suddenly remembered that she had indeed said that she did not want to live.

Seeing him suddenly stop in the middle of speaking, Bai Huan was stunned, "Why... don't you want to live?"

The words even came out through gritted teeth.

Su She glanced at the candy wrapper in her hand, and after a long silence, she raised her head and smiled at Bai Huan.

"Before... I didn't want to live."

Bai Huan froze when he heard the words.

Su She didn't care, and then smiled, "Because you drove to commit suicide at that time, I felt that a person who I couldn't bear to slap in the face would hurt himself...I can't do anything...Then I'll just follow him...I'll start Just die...what if I die from pain..."

"Plus, although the medical technology is advanced for my disease...but it is leukemia after all... I don't think I can live long... That's what I thought."

Su She said in a low voice, thinking about reaching out to take Bai Huan's hand, and rubbing it against her face.

He whispered again, "I didn't have the courage to hug you before, but now, you take the initiative to hug me, how can I be willing to leave you."

……

Seeing that Bai Huan hadn't responded for a long time, Su She looked up.

Then helplessly got up from the bed.

He kissed Bai Huan's lips in one breath.

He murmured softly, "I used to...why didn't I realize that you love to cry so much?"

Bai Huan didn't move, and let him kiss.

He didn't refute why he was crying.

He just thought that Su She still had a lot to say.

Lin An said, "He is too tired to live. He gave you all the love, but you only gave him endless snow. The snow was so vast that he lost his way and finally wanted to disappear."

"Your current love seems to be deep and righteous. Who knows if one day you will suddenly think of sympathy or pity, and then leave him?"

Bai Huan wiped more and more tears, Su She simply stopped wiping, and stretched out her arms to hug Bai Huan tightly.

"I promise you, I won't go back on my word."

"Don't cry. People say that Young Master Bai is the most ruthless. If someone sees you crying with tears all over your face, you will lose your face."

"Don't cry, I'm still alive." Su She lay on Bai Huan's shoulder in distress, his Bai Huan, his Bai Huan, his beloved Bai Huan.

Bai Huan nodded slightly and hummed, stretched out his hand to rub Su She's face, and said awkwardly, "Don't cry too, it's so ugly to cry."

Only then did Su She realize that the coolness on her face was actually tears.

Thinking about it, he found it funny, pulled Bai Huan over and laughed.

"You're becoming more and more unscrupulous, why do you keep crying?" Su She mumbled while hugging Bai Huan.

The two lay on the bed hugging each other, Bai Huan looked at Su She softly, and leaned in for a small kiss.

Then he took a breath and said, "It's not that you are not good."

Su She blinked, and felt that Bai Huan's tone was very funny, as if she was being coquettish, "You're not normal... ah..."

Bai Huan pinched his face heavily, raised his eyebrows, "Isn't it normal? Huh?"

Su She smiled and apologized, "...normal, normal, very normal...don't pinch...it hurts..."

Bai Huan immediately let go of his hand when he heard the pain, and then hugged Su She tightly, the two of them were almost stuck together.

Su She felt an inexplicable impulse welling up in her heart, and glanced furtively at Bai Huan.

Just happened to catch Bai Huan's gaze looking at him, and shrunk his neck weakly.

Bai Huan just looked at him and laughed.

Bright eyes and white teeth, starry eyes hidden.

Pretty tight.

Rubbing Su She's bald head, Bald Huan said seriously, "You are mine."

"You are not allowed to go."

……

"Have you ever been to school?" Su She asked while peeling candy for her.

The wind outside the window came in slowly, most of it was covered by Bai Huan who was sitting by the window, and a small part was blown to Su She's side, lifting the corner of the hospital gown.

Nannan picked up the remaining candy in Su She's hand, her eyes were a little dim, and her voice was slightly envious, "I have been there, but I got sick later... They don't want to make friends with me..."

Su She was hit by an unknown emotion in her heart, and her face was a little ugly, "It's okay, uncle is playing with my daughter."

Nannan pointed her fingers, nodded, and laughed softly, "Uncle Qiuqiu will give you sweets, Uncle Qiuqiu is the best."

Su She had a good time, kissed her niece fondly, and said in a clear voice, "To show you reward uncle, can I sing to you?"

Nannan let out a soft cry, clapped her hands together, and said happily, "Okay!"

Hearing the sound, Bai Huan raised his head and glanced at them from the document, his eyes were gentle and lingering, and there was an inadvertent smile on the corner of his mouth.

"Ahem." Su She cleared her throat, tried her best to ignore Bai Huan's existence, and opened her mouth to hum.

After a pause for a few seconds, he sang softly, "The black sky hangs low, and the bright stars follow."

Nannan let out a soft cry and looked at Su She with wide eyes.

Su She had no time to think about her reaction, and continued to sing, "Chongerfei, Chongerfei... Who are you missing?"

Nannan reached out to reach for the water glass on Bai Huan's table, Bai Huan handed it to her gently, and said, "Drink slowly."

Nai Nai nodded.

"The stars in the sky..." Su She took a sip of water halfway through singing