A and M's Daily Season 2

I came to the United States to study high school and university, but I never got a driver's license. There is one reason: who needs a driver's license when there is an uncle as a driver.

Before going to school, he drove me to sleep; now at work, he drives me to sleep, after get off work, he drives me to sleep, wherever I want to go, he drives me to sleep.

My uncle persuaded me to take the American driver's license test quickly. I always go in one ear and out the other, and I say yes, and never take any action.

Until one day he broke his arm and couldn't drive for a short time.The next morning there was no one to pick me up at work, and it was a rare ride on the New York subway, which made me feel stupid.The sea was crowded and the waves were choppy. After getting out of the car, my legs were still shaking. When I touched my pocket, my mother's MP4 was stolen, and my mood dropped by 120 percent in an instant.

When I got home at night, I yelled at my uncle, "I must learn to drive this time! I will apply to the driving school tomorrow! I will take the test next month!"

Uncle swiped the e-book with one hand, without saying a word.

I was not happy, "I said I want to learn to drive, and this is your reaction?"

He dealt with me casually while reading, "I asked you to learn to drive from the day we first moved in together. Have you learned? You have been procrastinating until now."

Me: ...I want to learn now.

He said unhappily, "Want to learn now? It's too late, I can only teach you when my arm recovers. You can only ride a bicycle or take the subway for two months."

Me: You don’t have to teach me. I can go to a driving school in Chinatown and enroll in a class.

Uncle curled his lips: Why do you apply for a driving school? I said before that I want to teach you if you don’t learn, but now I want to learn again. You only need 3 minutes of enthusiasm, let’s put it down.

Slapped him, "I want to learn now, can't I? I will report to the class tomorrow."

He ignored me and continued reading.

The next day I went to work and searched the driving school. The American Chinese driving school is developing very well. From teaching to exams, there is a full package. There is also a set meal. You can get one lesson for every ten lessons. You are 18 years old. You don’t need to take education courses, just take it casually Practice your hands in a few lessons, and you can take the test directly after learning.I called decisively, bought a package of ten classes plus one exam, paid the money after get off work, and went to the butcher next door to buy half a chicken in marinade.

At dinner, Lawyer Mi clumsily grabbed the chicken's neck with one hand, gnawed all over his face, and still had time to ask, "Why did you suddenly go to Chinatown to buy chicken today?"

Perfunctory: "Suddenly want to eat, buy it back for an extra meal"

He gnawed and figured it out, and threw a clean chicken bone over, "Did you secretly report to the driving school?!"

I didn't dodge, and was hit by a chicken bone. I was anxious, "Hey you, I specially bought delicious food and came back to give you extra meals. Are you doing this to me?"

He snorted, "What about extra meals, or did you buy it to please me? I told you that I will teach you when I get better. Why don't you apply to the driving school?"

I wondered: "Why do you have to teach me yourself? The driving school is not expensive, I can take the test after taking a dozen or so lessons."

Uncle stopped talking, picked up another chicken leg and began to gnaw, spitting foam while gnawing, "To punish you, I ate all of this chicken, and I won't let you eat it!"

The stewed products in Chinatown are very salty, especially for meals. He lost weight and didn’t eat carbohydrates at night. He didn’t eat, and he ate half a chicken for a long time. cup.

I don't know who is punished by this evil pen, and who is the one who suffers?

I went to learn to drive on the weekend. After dinner, my uncle took me like a baby who was sent to school for the first day by my mother, and told me, "When you drive, you must pay attention to the pedestrians next to you. New Yorkers never look at traffic lights. Maybe they are from where pop out one"

"The streets of New York are not easy to drive, don't worry when you drive, take your time"

"Remember to stop at a red light and go at a green light. Accelerate on the right, brake on the left, accelerator on the right, and brake on the left. Don't get confused..."

My head got bigger when I heard it, and I couldn't help but yelled, "Michelle! I'm not disabled, I'm not a child, I'm just going to learn to drive. Don't you put it down? Don't worry, I'm leaving, I'll be back in two hours"

He reluctantly waved his undamaged paw, "Be careful, remember to buy some egg tarts and pineapple buns from Chinatown."

Take the car to the meeting place, find the car with XXX driving school on it, knock on the glass, the person inside lowers the window, "You huh? What's the matter?"

A strong taste of Northeast big ballast hits the face.

Me: "...um, well, hello, I have an appointment to learn how to drive at 1 pm"

The middle-aged man in the driver's seat put away the newspaper, "Oh my god, I've been waiting for you for a long time, you are Zhang XX, right?"

He looked at the list, and then at me, "This big girl, hey, it's not right, big brother, and it's not right... Hey, you said you got your name, hey, are you a boy or a girl?"

Me: ... I am a male doll.

The driver opened the door and got out of the car, gave up the driver's seat, sat on the co-pilot, and said with a smile, "I'm so sorry, you look like a little girl, I almost admitted my mistake."

Get in the car, fasten your seat belt, and the master begins to teach you some basic knowledge on the road.He vomited and talked for a long time, and finally said, "Do you understand? If you understand, you should first find out and start it."

I nodded and tried to get out of the car.Driving is easier than I imagined, and it goes smoothly.After driving for a while, someone suddenly ran out, and was so frightened that he slammed on the brakes immediately.The master sitting next to him was eating steamed buns when he was hit by a sudden brake, and the meat inside covered his face. He wiped his head and cursed out of the window, "I'll let you run, you little girl, run as hard as you can! Run to kill you!" Tiger whistle!"

"A little nigger with two chairs, trousers dragging so low, what are you doing? Selling ass? Fuck you"

"Hey, hello, these little turtles"

The Northeast dialect was uttered, and the man had an ExcuseME black question mark face when he heard it.

The master scolded me so much, he took out another steamed stuffed bun from the lunch box and stuffed it into his mouth, motioning for me to continue opening.I didn't react for a moment, I held the steering wheel without moving, and stared at him.The uncle thought I was looking at the buns in his hands, so he took one out of the lunch box and stuffed it into my hand with a grin, "Are you hungry? Eat some first, my wife's buns are delicious."

I took a bite, and the strong sauerkraut smell filled the whole car.

He smelled the smell, "You are so lucky, my wife put a sauerkraut for me, and you ate it. Are the buns made by my wife delicious?"

I swallowed the bun silently, "...delicious"

The two of them continued to practice the car after eating the buns. The master commanded like a monkey in Northeast dialect, "Turn right, turn right, which corner are you heading for?"

"Oh my big girl, oh no big brother, you slow down, take it easy, what are you doing? So fast? Reincarnation?"

"Super super super! I don't like to see that BMW go crazy, what kind of crazy, do you have the ability to hit it?"

"It's okay (four beeps), listen to me, rush, I can rush over, hurry up, oh my god, hurry up! Okay! I rushed over, today's day"

"Damn it, catch up with that crumpled truck, it's so ink stained"

After an hour and a half, my back was covered in cold sweat.After the class, the master drove me to the subway station, and held my hand before getting off, "Big brother, I will take you from now on, see you next week."

My hands and feet are weak, and my voice is trembling: ... See you next week.

I went home by car with a complicated mood, and I smelled a coke smell as soon as I entered the door. I guess my uncle tossed some dark dishes in the kitchen.

When he saw me coming back, he ran out, "Are you back? How are you doing? Looking at your expression, you're not very happy?"

I frowned and glanced at him, then glanced at the disaster-stricken kitchen, feeling even more gloomy, ignored him, and went upstairs to change clothes.

He thought I was angry, and chased after me, "Hey, what's wrong with you, Asher? Tell me? Did the driving school master murder you? I told you that driving school masters are murderous, don't worry, this is Why don't I want you to go to a driving school to learn, those drivers are fierce, always swearing, if I teach you, you won't be like that..."

The crackling chatter made my head swell, I took off my coat and threw it over, and yelled, "It's nothing (four beeps), shut up! What the hell are you talking about?"

Uncle: (⊙x⊙;)

I was changing clothes upstairs, and my uncle secretly called my sister for help.

"Your brother seems to be angry again, inexplicably saying strange things"

The younger sister has become used to it naturally, and asked directly, "What did he say this time?"

Uncle thought for a while, then reluctantly repeated, "Mishi, shut up if you're hungry, and save yourself if you're blind"

younger sister:……

The contagious ability of the Northeast accent is simply not comparable to that of other regions. After ten weeks of car learning with the Northeast master, the Beijing accent was successfully brought into the northeast accent.

On the day of the driver's license test, my uncle also took a special day off, and he had to come along with him, so he called it: spiritual support.I was taken to the exam by the examiner, and lawyer Rumi and the coach stayed there.The exam went very well, it ended in more than ten minutes, and passed smoothly.When they came back with the note, Lawyer Mi was speaking English, and the coach was speaking Northeast dialect. One could not speak English and the other could not speak Chinese.

The coach saw me coming back, saw the note in my hand again, and smiled, "Passed? Congratulations!"

I nodded with a smile, and breathed a sigh of relief, "It's a good thing that I passed it, and if I didn't pass it, I would have to take another ten classes."

After the exam and ready to go home, the coach said that since you passed the exam, you can drive the return trip.I was driving in front, and Lawyer Mi and the coach continued to chat behind.First send the coach back to Chinatown, the coach got off the car, took out the business card and handed it to me and my uncle, first patted my shoulder and said: After getting the driver's license, the young man drives carefully, don't drive in a hurry, when driving Don't (four beeps) play around with your phone, that iPhone is so interesting?Life is more important than mobile phones.

He patted Uncle again, "We had a good chat with you, let's come out and chat with you when we have time."

Lawyer Mi shook hands with him, speaking in English: ok ok.

The coach left, and my uncle sat in the co-pilot consciously. I asked him, "What did you two talk about just now?"

Lawyer Mi said hehe, "I didn't understand a single word he said."

I:……

The language barrier can still be so active.

"No, why are you nodding if you don't understand?"

"I just think his words are very interesting. They all speak Chinese. What he said is different from what you said."

"Of course, Er Beijing, he is Dongbei, so the (four voices) must be different when talking about such things."

Lawyer Mi: ...

I:……

For a long time after I finished my driver's license test, my "Northeast dialect contagious sequelae" has not been corrected, and even my uncle has been misled. Now I always "mi you", "sister you", "blind" with me , "What are you doing?", "What's hot?", "Yeah", "La Ladi" with an extremely non-standard Northeast accent and a blond look, the picture is so hot.