Jiang Hao

He quickly got out of the water and put on his pajamas.

The line of his thighs is very strong, completely different from the pants he usually wears, and the black boxer briefs make his flashing butt unexpectedly sexy...

"You're finally awake..." Jiang Hao said to me standing by the bed, wiping his hair.

"What time is it?" I didn't dare to look at him, and subconsciously reached out to touch my phone under my pillow.

"It's past 11 o'clock." He turned and walked to the toilet, "I thought you were going to sleep until lunch time."

The night before, I had insomnia in the middle of the night, listening to Jiang Hao’s even breathing sound sleeping next to me, the restlessness in my heart made me want to go out for a few laps, “What’s for lunch?”

"Jason said to go climbing," his voice came from the toilet, "let us eat by ourselves."

After lunch, Jiang Hao and I sat on the balcony of our room and chatted every sentence.

"Actually, I always remember you..." Jiang Hao suddenly brought the content of the chat to an unknown rhythm, "It was when you were in junior high school, you laughed at me."

After being stunned for a few seconds, I turned to look at him, "Impossible, we didn't know each other at that time."

Jiang Hao laughed, "Because you were unconscious, and I happened to overhear you."

I was a little taken aback.

"I encountered some things when I was in junior high school. You couldn't believe it and taunted me... I happened to be walking behind you. I didn't know it was you at that time. I only knew it when I heard your name." Jiang Hao said with a tone Take it easy, it seems to be talking about unimportant past events.

"Well," I nodded, "what's the matter? I don't remember it at all..."

"I met a guy in middle school, and I was leaving for high school. I didn't have a good time with him. He had a big fight with the family about me, and then his mother committed suicide."

After Jiang Hao finished speaking, he stood up, walked past me, and went straight into the room.I turned around and saw him lying on the bed, staring straight at the ceiling.

"I...at that time..." Recalling this incident seriously, I was shocked that the rumors I heard back then turned out to be true, and I was even more surprised that the protagonist of this incident was actually Jiang Hao.I never thought that the 'joke' in his mouth was something I didn't pay attention to back then, and I wouldn't associate him with the word 'homosexual' if I were killed.This means that some reveries that originally belonged to me may become real.

"It's nothing." Jiang Hao looked at me, "At that time, everyone's evaluations were similar."

I stood up from the chair, then lay down on the other side of the bed, and there was a big distance between me and Jiang Hao, "I..." It's not that I'm stupid, but I really don't know what to say right now, I haven't been nervous yet Find yourself in your emotions. "Does Auntie know?" I avoided the important and asked questions that were not relevant to me.

"What do you mean?" Jiang Hao shook his head, "My mother didn't know about it, and didn't tell her a word at that time. My mother didn't know that I had a relationship with a man at that time, either."

Jiang Hao actually said this so directly, complex and strange emotions began to occupy my heart.In an instant, I found the reason for my "abnormality" towards Jiang Hao, "What happened?"

"I knew that person when I was in the second year of junior high school, and then I experienced some things. I had already booked to leave here in high school. He couldn't accept it. He went home and told his family that he would go with me or something. His mother couldn't accept him. , quarreled for a long time, and finally committed suicide."

Jiang Hao's voice was full of sadness that could not be hidden.It felt as if the previous wound was torn open again, and Xue Linlin appeared in front of me, "Where is he now?"

"I don't know," Jiang Hao closed his eyes, but he was surprisingly calm, "At that time, he said that he hated me, that he regretted being like me, that if possible, he would rather let me die in exchange for his mother."

I couldn't help but move my body closer to Jiang Hao, I had the urge to hug him, "Why are you thinking about this?" But I didn't do that, self-protection was at work, or I felt Jiang Hao's resistance... I can't tell, But the distance between me and him seems to have become bigger because of these few words.

Jiang Hao raised his eyes and met my eyes, "It's nothing, I just remembered this suddenly..." The corners of his mouth were raised, but his smile was extremely ugly, "I swore from then on that I would never mess with men again, No matter who it is, never."

I understood what Jiang Hao meant, his eyes, voice, and movements, everything he expressed was accepted by me.

"It's more reliable to find a girlfriend." I replied after being stunned for a few seconds.

Jiang Hao told me this story on purpose, just to say to me, 'Sun Yikun, stay away from me, I'm not interested. 'He saw my 'abnormality' and gave me the answer in the most direct way.In a sense, Xiaoye should really fucking thank you, Jiang Hao.

"We still have to wait until we like it..." Jiang Hao replied as if nothing happened.

"No matter what, I have to record your story, and I can be regarded as a witness." I was a little unconvinced.

Seeing me, Jiang Hao changed his tone, "Witness what?"

"The only round trip in your life." This sentence is full of sarcasm, and I mean it.

Jiang Hao is so smart, he can understand.He smiled and didn't take me seriously.

11

In a sense, this journey did change the relationship between me and Jiang Hao, but it was completely opposite to what I thought.From then on, I became resistant to Jiang Hao's sensitivity.Rather than embarrassing me because of his disguised refusal, it would be better to think that the naked psychological exposure brought about by being seen through made me feel the need to escape.

Jiang Hao's words made me calm down a lot.

On the psychological level, conditioned reflex produces self-restraint. When looking at his body, the restlessness seemed to be poured by ice water and cooled down.

I'm not sure whether Jiang Hao can do what he said, 'never mess with men again', but for me, life is always a one-way ticket, and it is impossible to return to the original self.

I didn't have an intuitive feeling about my changes, but Gao Siyan complained a month after the sports meeting.

It was a Friday in May, and I was supposed to go back to the old campus on Thursday night, but she suddenly urged me to stay with her that week.

"Did you meet someone else?" Gao Siyan asked me after lunch, dragged me into the corridor of the teaching building, "I think you are not normal recently."

I frowned, it had been more than a month since I was 'abnormal' to Jiang Hao, and I hadn't seen him during that time, "What are you thinking?" Avoiding her eyes, I could handle it easily.

Gao Siyan took my hand and walked towards the safe passage deep in the corridor, "It's obviously..." she said in a coquettish voice.

She pulled me into the safe passage, locked the door from the outside, and then interlocked my fingers and kissed me.When I was with her at the beginning, I was always fussy with her, and she didn't push me away.Most of the time, I just point to the end, and occasionally I have some behaviors of brushing aside.

That afternoon, she was so unexpectedly enthusiastic that I was pushed down the stairs by her.

She sat on top of me in a dress, not for the first time, but me.It was at that time that I made sure that I didn't have a "virgin complex" and insisted on "the first time". I was even glad that she was not the first time.

On the one hand, this reduced some of my psychological pressure, and on the other hand, it also made it less embarrassing that afternoon.

When I left the fast lane, I kept checking to see if there was any surveillance around me, and I seemed a little worried.

"Don't worry, let's go." On the contrary, Gao Siyan was very calm, she put her arms around my waist and bowed her head beside me, as if she was very satisfied with me.

My first reaction was that she might have had a similar experience here before, and then I felt that it had little to do with me.I put my arms around her shoulders, and my feelings for her sank a lot. Anyway, she is the one who brings me happiness with me, and this feeling is very real.

I thought of Xiaoli that night, and I remembered Xiaoli's reluctance at that time.In less than a year, I no longer think that Xiaoli didn't love me enough then, and of course I don't think that Gao Siyan loves me more now.

When I thought of Xiaoli, I naturally thought of Jiang Hao again. That night I lost sleep for several hours.

Like all men, once meat is turned on, it is difficult to restrain oneself.

The last month of the first half of the semester was the period when I liked Gao Siyan the most. I couldn't tell whether I liked it in my heart or my body. From an instinctual point of view, I didn't intend to tell the difference.

It was hot at the end of June, and I stayed with Gao Siyan in the air-conditioned study room of the teaching building all day long.In name, it is to study hard, but in fact, it is to use all kinds of time to spend time in various corners without monitors.

Occasionally, I would think of Jiang Hao, and it would feel like a lifetime away, and then I would stop worrying about it.

The first Friday in July is also the week before our school holiday.I asked Gao Siyan to take the school bus back to the old campus with me at night, and wanted her to stay at my house on weekends.My parents happened to be on a business trip that week, so I wanted to take advantage of the opportunity to hang out.

Early that morning I received a text message from Jiang Hao: [Are you going back today?It's my birthday, how about treating you to dinner tonight? 】When I saw the text message, I felt as if I missed half a beat. I stared blankly at the phone, and I even forgot my weekend arrangements for a moment.

【I have something to do tonight. ] After a few minutes, I will reply like this.Singing the opposite tune with Jiang Hao, deliberately confronting each other has become a kind of release, very instinctive.I knew it was meaningless, but before I had time to think clearly, the text message in my hand had already been sent.

He returned after a long time: 【Forget it. 】

I hadn't gotten out of bed when I got the text