The temporary judge wants to cultivate immortality

Only after Shen Xiaoliu's throat was sore from shouting did he say in a hoarse voice, "Young Master, you've had your fill of cursing. Deduct as much as you want. Now tell me about becoming an immortal."

"Ding! The first merit-building task for the new host has been issued. Before nightfall, build a plaque inscribed with 'Hall of Merit' and place it in front of the courtyard gate. Upon completion of the task, you will be rewarded with one initial purification of your physical body."

Xiao Liu asked curiously, "In front of the gate? System brother, putting such a grand name outside a shabby fence, does our family still have any dignity?"

"The task cannot be modified. Please execute it, host."

Xiao Liu, exasperated, asked, "What are the requirements for the plaque for the Hall of Merit? And what does 'physical purification' mean?"

"My lord, the plaque is only required to be visible to the naked eye. The physical purification reward can improve the mortal physique, ward off evil spirits and resist the cold, and over time one can attain the body of a half-immortal."

"that's it?"

"That's all"

Shen Xiaoliu pursed his lips to his ears, got off the kang (a heated brick bed), and went to look for a wooden board. In his mind, finding a piece of wood to make do would be fine, but after searching the whole house, he could only find a whole "large cutting board" on the stove in the outer room.

Xiao Liu wanted to find Er Ya to see if there were any more suitable materials, since he only had one cutting board and he was really reluctant to part with it. However, Er Ya hadn't been seen since she went out at lunchtime, so she probably went to the silkworm farm to feed the silkworms.

"Alright, this is it," Xiao Liu said, steeling himself. He picked up a piece of charcoal from the stove and crookedly drew three characters in charcoal ash on the cutting board: "Gongdetang".

Fortunately, none of these three characters have distinctions between ancient and modern, simplified and traditional, otherwise it would have been really difficult for Xiao Liu.

Just as he placed the merit-making cutting board outside the fence, a sudden "buzz" resounded in his mind, like a resounding bell, and his body swayed several times, almost losing his balance.

Xiao Liu hurriedly grabbed the wooden fence and walked into the yard, but the dizziness made it impossible for him to hold on for even a moment longer.

In a daze, he leaned against the wooden fence by the door, his body burning with unbearable heat. He almost tore off his tattered coat to protect himself. At the same time, tiny, bean-sized, emerald-green droplets, like sprites, rose from the muddy ground and flew into the air. In the blink of an eye, right under Xiao Liu's nose, they entered his body, from bottom to top and from the outside in. A cool sensation flowed into his mind and counteracted the heat within his body.

How to describe this feeling? In Xiao Liu's own words: It's like the "ice and fire" service often used by massage girls. The only difference is that the "ice" is too damn cold, while the "fire" is definitely the Samadhi True Fire in Laozi's furnace!

"System, save me, I'm about to die," Shen Xiaoliu mumbled incoherently. Although he, a struggling writer, had read many light novels about cultivation, he was still terrified and cried for help when it came to his own situation.

The system voice came through: "Reporting to the host, the physical body purification will take another half an incense stick's time. Please immediately release what you are holding to prevent spiritual energy from leaking out."

Xiao Liu groggily loosened his grip on the wooden fence he was still holding, and then fell into a deep sleep.

In his dream, he dreamt that he was playing with the Seven Fairy Maidens in the bathhouse of Shibalipu, and that the Cowherd was scrubbing his back.

When he opened his eyes, he found that there was indeed a man and a woman in front of him, but they were not the Cowherd and the Fairy, but Da Chengzi and Er Ya. At this moment, Li Zicheng was actually standing on his back with his big feet, while Er Ya was crying her eyes out.

"Look at you, you're just a goose, a melon ball, you won't die," Li Zicheng said, dusting his feet off as he saw me wake up. "You need to take a bath, you're covered in mud and slippery as a loach."

Er Ya no longer cared about Da Chengzi in front of her. With tears in her eyes, she rushed to Xiao Liu's side, knelt on the kang and cried, "Husband, you're finally awake! You scared Er Ya to death!"

The room was filled with a nauseating, extremely foul odor, like fish, stench, smell, and rancid smells; in short, it almost made him faint again.

Xiao Liu smoothed her messy hair and said, "Er Ya, I'm fine. Where did you go at noon? I was so worried about you."

Hearing her husband's tender words, the woman, a country wife who knew nothing of etiquette, cried even harder, her already eerie face contorted into the likeness of the Four Heavenly Kings at the temple gate, saying, "I went to the village shop to get you some wine, and when I came back I saw you lying all alone outside the courtyard." After saying this, she actually started wailing.

The kneeling posture, combined with the buttoned-up blouse unique to women in the Ming Dynasty, revealed the surging waves within, causing Xiao Liu's heart to surge and his lower body to react immediately. Fortunately, he was in a prone position, so nothing could be seen. If Da Chengzi hadn't been in the room, he would have pounced like a hungry tiger!

"You're all alone, so go ahead and cry. If I were lying outside in the courtyard with a pretty young woman, you'd be fine, wouldn't you?" Xiao Liu grinned and asked again, "Does getting wine really take that long?"

Er Ya playfully tapped Xiao Liu lightly, then turned to look at Li Zicheng without saying a word.

"Where's your silver bracelet?" Xiao Liu glanced at her wrist and immediately grabbed Er Ya to ask.

Er Ya's gaze froze, tears still streaming down her face. She choked out, "I'm just a village woman, carrying a burden."

Just as Xiao Liu was about to say something, he saw Li Zicheng staring at Er Ya, who was kneeling on the kang (a heated brick bed). His gaze landed squarely on Er Ya's protruding buttocks, as if she were in a daze. Xiao Liu quickly shouted, "You, hey! I'm talking to you, Da Chengzi. Go stand over there. Don't you know any manners?"

It took Li Zicheng a while to come to his senses, his face turning red: "No, I was thinking of my wife back home, I didn't see... I didn't see the fairy's butt."

As he spoke, a "ding" sounded in Xiao Liu's mind: "Reporting to the host, due to your foul language, another year of your lifespan will be deducted."

He then remembered the system, but fearing that Er Ya would be frightened, he didn't respond. However, the smell in the room was too unpleasant, so he said to Er Ya, "Help me out for some fresh air," and then said to Li Zicheng, "Go and open all the doors and windows to let the smell dissipate."

Night had fallen, but there was still some light.

As soon as Xiao Liu stepped out of the house, she was greeted by a fragrant aroma of flowers and the incessant chirping of baby birds, a delightful and refreshing sound.

That's not all. As soon as you look in, the dilapidated fence of the yard is turning pink, and the two wooden stakes that were originally supporting the gate are faintly showing green. Upon closer inspection, there are even countless tender buds on them!

“Look, my husband, I wasn’t like this when I came back. But when I came in and wiped your body, I came out looking like this. Could it be the work of the flower fairy or the tree spirit?” Er Ya rested her head on Xiao Liu’s shoulder, it was hard to tell whether she was worried or happy.

The fragrance of flowers and the greenery of willows have a natural allure for a woman, regardless of whether she is beautiful or not.

"No demons. Da Chengzi's family is planting greenery. He had someone plant it in the afternoon while things were in chaos," Xiao Liu replied casually.

"Didn't you say he was a refugee?" Er Ya asked, looking up in confusion.

"That's because I was afraid you'd be tempted by money, covet wealth, and abandon me, your husband who's shared your hardships, to run away with him. That's why I said that," Xiao Liu said, looking at Er Ya's face, and then chuckled to himself.

Er Ya flung Xiao Liu's hand away, regaining her composure. As she walked toward the kitchen, she said, "Am I that kind of person? By the way, we're running low on salt. Have Da Chengzi go to the city to buy some tomorrow. Don't buy too much; five jars will be enough."

Xiao Liu looked at Er Ya's graceful and curvaceous figure in the night and shook his head with a smile. He then held onto two withered trees that had sprouted new buds and said with a laugh, "Autumn has arrived, and it's time for them to sprout and mate again."

Just then, two figures appeared in the darkness, walking along the country road. Xiao Liu recognized them immediately by their awful, swaying gait. Damn it, it was Huang Simao!

Sure enough, Huang Simao walked up with a cigarette in his mouth, accompanied by a fat man dressed in coarse cloth. Seeing Shen Xiaoliu at the door, he took two quick puffs of his cigarette, then threw it on the ground and stomped it out, suppressing a laugh as he said, "Hey, the Merit System is working, huh? How does it feel? Tell me, isn't it great?"

Xiao Liu's face darkened, and he was about to explode when Huang Simao quickly pointed at him and said, "Let me tell you, don't swear. Swearing will get you a year's fine."

"I won't curse you anymore. This time, I'll find a rock and smash you to death, you old bastard who's wreaking havoc on the world!" Xiao Liu shouted as he crouched down and pretended to grope around on the ground.

Huang Simao quickly stepped back: "Assaulting someone will result in a ten-year fine!"

Shen Xiaoliu ignored him and reached into Huang Simao's clothes to find a cigarette. Huang Simao, the ugly woman, had a comfortable expression on her face and said in a coquettish voice, "Yes, touch, just a little higher and you'll touch it." Xiaoliu was so frightened that he quickly pulled his hand out, only then remembering that Huang Simao was now a woman.

"Who is he?" Xiao Liu asked, taking the cigarette from Si Mao and gesturing with his chin towards the fat man.

Huang Simao lit the tinder himself first, and then handed the tinder to Xiao Liu, saying, "It also came from underground. Time is of the essence, so you should sentence them one after the other tonight."

Xiao Liu glared at him and said, "They've already sentenced me? Am I not allowed to sleep? Look at the state they've left me in during the day!"

Huang Simao ignored him and instead mimicked his actions from yesterday on the tree-lined path, putting his hands behind his back and tilting his head back at a 30-degree angle to admire the night view.

Shen Xiaoliu had no choice but to take a deep drag on his cigarette and ask the fat man, "Who are you? You're dressed quite simply."

The man bowed slightly and said in a humble manner, "I am Wu Sangui, the Prince of Pingxi."

......

"Huang Simao, don't you dare run away! Ten years in jail, I'll take it!"