The temporary judge wants to cultivate immortality

That's why Er Ya is such a good wife. She completely ignored what Xiao Liu had just said and instead fussed over him for a while, saying that the east room was too cold and unwelcoming, which would harm his health; and that he needed to take good care of himself after recovering from a serious illness.

A beak as loud as a nightingale's song left Shen Xiaoliu no chance to interject.

It wasn't until the pale-faced man helped him to the door of the main house that he seemed to suddenly come to his senses and asked with a bewildered look, "Who did you say came?"

“A friend who is fleeing famine has come to stay at my house for one night and will leave tomorrow morning,” Xiao Liu changed his words.

Er Ya stared into Shen Xiaoliu's eyes, put her hands on her hips, and asked in a serious tone, "Male or female?"

This is Er Ya's simple yet capable side. When she learned that it was a man, she didn't ask where he came from. She turned around and ran to the stove, gently saying, "Hurry up and let him come to the main room to keep you company. We'll serve you dinner in the time it takes for an incense stick to burn."

Xiao Liu returned to the east room and saw Da Chengzi casually drawing something with the charcoal ash on the ground. He would occasionally touch his chin as if he was thinking. When Xiao Liu got closer, he asked in a thick Shaanxi accent, "How far is this place from the capital?"

“Twenty minutes by car, take the Jing-Tong Expressway,” Xiao Liu said, completely ignoring what Li Zicheng was asking, his attention entirely focused on the patterns on the ground.

That was actually a "strategic map of the advance," with three big arrows pointing directly at a square-shaped area!

Li Zicheng suddenly stood up and reached out to Xiao Liu: "Is there a car here? Give the key to the goose."

Xiao Liu tugged at his hair: "Calm down, squat down."

Then he asked, "What place are you referring to by drawing this square?"

A cold glint flashed in Da Chengzi's eyes: "The Forbidden City."

Xiao Liu plopped down on the ground. No doubt, those three arrows were pointing at Huang Simao, Shen Xiao Liu, and himself!

Xiao Liu patiently pulled Li Zicheng back onto the kang (heated brick bed): "Brother Cheng, why did you rebel in the first place?"

"Acting on behalf of Heaven!"

Xiao Liu tapped the edge of the kang (a heated brick bed) with his finger: "Get out, get out, stop spouting slogans."

Da Chengzi blushed slightly, but the feeling of being exposed was only momentary. He said, "What are the officials doing? We can't eat or drink, but the officials are doing all sorts of good things. It's outrageous!"

Shen Xiaoliu quickly closed the door again: "Keep your voice down!"

Unexpectedly, Li Zicheng turned around and pulled out a long knife from under the pile of bedding with a whoosh: "Hmph, no matter how many bad soldiers there are, I am not afraid."

Xiao Liu walked towards the edge of the kang, stopping every few steps: "You, you, you put the knife away first, I have something to ask you."

"The immortals want to ask what it means to win."

A celestial being? Oh right, at least in front of Da Chengzi, Xiao Liu is a celestial being, a judge of Yin and Yang personally appointed by the King of Hell.

"Brother Cheng, when you raised your army back then, did you already have a wicked plan to become the emperor?"

Da Chengzi tilted his chin up: "I didn't!"

Xiao Liu craned his neck and said, "Lower your head, it's too much trouble for me to look up at you."

Li Zicheng, however, acted like a rogue and said, "There's no such thing as a real thing. What nonsense are you spouting, Gua Liu?"

Xiao Liu knew that "melon" wasn't a good word, so he suppressed his anger and pointed to the military map on the ground: "Fine, if you don't have it, you don't have it. Stop yelling. But you're no longer connected to the mortal world, so why are you still thinking about attacking the Forbidden City?"

Li Zicheng stared at Xiao Liu for a long time, then asked, "You know about military affairs? Are you skilled in martial arts?" Before he could finish speaking, his long sword flashed in the room, startling Xiao Liu so much that he jumped high and fell off the kang (a heated brick bed).

Da Chengzi looked at Xiao Liu on the ground with an innocent expression: "That's right, aren't you some kind of immortal? Just pretending to be a hero."

Xiao Liu could no longer contain himself and jumped up and down cursing, "Screw you, if I hadn't dodged a little slower you would have chopped me off under the bed! Hurry up and put the knife here with me first."

Li Zicheng seemed to pay little attention to Xiao Liu's words, and even ignored the long sword on the kang (a heated brick bed). He squatted down in front of the marching map on the ground and asked, "Xiao Liu, tell me, how can we seize the capital region?"

"Take my ass! Huang Simao brought you here to vent your pent-up resentment. That bastard never told me you were planning a rebellion," Xiao Liu said, reaching for Da Chengzi's long sword. He tried it, then put it down—it was too damn heavy. He pretended nothing was wrong, dusted his hands off, and continued:

"By the way, what exactly are you holding a grudge against?"

Just then, the sound of a spatula clattering against a pot came from the stove in the main room. Based on Xiao Liu's experience of spending the past two years with Er Ya, this was the spatula calling, indicating that it was time to eat.

Although Huang Simao didn't leave Dachengzi any money for food, Erya still treated him very warmly. She served him a plate of scrambled eggs with chives, two plates of pickled vegetables, and two coarse flour buns in each person's bowl. As for herself, she hid in the small house after everything was prepared and didn't show herself.

This gave Xiao Liu a new perspective on this "virtuous wife": she was both capable and respectable! You know, in this day and age, women couldn't sit at the table to eat in front of outsiders.

To be honest, if you covered that face with a straw basket, Xiao Liu would definitely fall head over heels in love with her. Even so, he still led Er Ya out of the hut as usual, forcibly made her sit on the stool, and called Da Chengzi to sit down at the table as well.

Even a hero like Da Chengzi, who had experienced countless battles and great storms, was still stunned when he saw Er Ya's face. He instinctively took two steps back before calming himself down and continuing to eat his steamed bun.

Xiao Liu noticed that his expression was a bit unnatural and his posture was very strange, hunched over like a shrimp. He said, "Brother Cheng, it's just simple food, please make do with this."

"What are you saying? I haven't eaten anything this delicious in over four hundred years! It's wonderful, wonderful! If I could have a bowl of mutton stew, I would die happy!" As he spoke, Li Zicheng took another big bite of the steamed bun, chewing it with his eyes closed as if he were savoring dragon liver and phoenix marrow.

Watching Da Chengzi eat, Er Ya whispered to Xiao Liu, "Your friend must be starving. How come he's been fleeing famine for over four hundred years? There are still steamed buns in the pot. If you don't have enough vegetables, I'll stew the old hen in the yard for you."

After she finished speaking, she was about to get up and leave her seat when Xiao Liu pulled her back. That old hen that laid eggs was Er Ya's treasure, and Xiao Liu was even more reluctant to part with it.

While Er Ya went to get some steamed buns for Da Chengzi, Xiao Liu asked Da Chengzi, "What's wrong with you? Why are you hunched over while you're sitting?"

Li Zicheng's big face turned red instantly. He looked outside, slapped his thigh, and groaned, "I'm telling you, I didn't know you had a female immortal with you at the table. Last night, I left the underworld in a hurry and was still wearing my open-crotch pants."

Shen Xiaoliu looked down under the table, and sure enough, there it was—a pair of cleavage-open pants flapping under the table...

You ran out of the underworld with Huang Simao wearing open-crotch pants? Your underworld even has TikTok, but doesn't it produce long pants and boxer briefs?

The atmosphere became extremely awkward, so Xiao Liu had to change the subject and asked in a low voice, "Brother Cheng, what exactly is your grievance that has kept you in the underworld for over four hundred years without reincarnation? Speaking of which, you have no resentment at all about losing your kingdom."

Upon hearing this, Da Chengzi's already flushed face instantly turned purple. He slammed his fists, each the size of a bowl, onto the old elm wood dining table at Xiao Liu's house and cursed, "That idiot Chen Yuanyuan, what nonsense is she spouting? She wrote to Wu Sangui saying that I forcibly took this idiot's virginity, and that my general Liu Zongmin also raped her. She has ruined my reputation and caused me to lose my kingdom. I cannot forgive this idiot!"

Shen Xiaoliu wasn't listening to a single word; he was just looking at his elmwood table with a long face, heartbroken.