The temporary judge wants to cultivate immortality

On the tree-lined road, Xiao Liu felt increasingly creeped out by the androgynous creature beside him, but for the sake of his future offspring, he could only humbly plead, "Big sister... no, big brother, can you give me back that thing first? I need to pee."

"You squat down and shush first," he said without even turning his head.

Helpless, Xiao Liu plopped down on the ground and started throwing a tantrum, yelling, "You're a grown man, hiding my two ounces of flesh in your clothes, don't you feel disgusted? Besides, I can't pee when I squat down!"

"You only realize how little you have when you need it, and you'll naturally urinate straight when you're in the forest," but the half-male, half-female goods still haven't turned back.

Shen Xiaoliu sat on the ground pondering his words for a long time. Then, looking up at the woods by the roadside, he suddenly scrambled to his feet as if struck by a sudden realization. He loosened his robe, unbuckled his belt, and pulled down his trousers in one fluid motion, tentatively reaching down to his crotch...

Thank goodness, it's still the original one!

"Tell me, what exactly happened? How did I end up here? And what do you want from me?" Xiao Liu paused, then quickly added, "Let's get this straight, you can't take back what you just gave me!"

The ugly woman looked at him, who was shaking his hands as he tied his pants drawstring, and said, "How could the King of Hell have chosen such a useless piece of trash like you..."

"What?"

"To put it simply, things are a bit chaotic in the underworld lately..."

"What?"

"There are rules in the underworld. Some people who were once controversial and prestigious in the mortal world have too much resentment and yang energy. After they die, they have to spend thousands of years in our underworld to get rid of the remaining resentment and yang energy before they can be reincarnated. Do you understand this principle?"

"What the heck?" Shen Xiaoliu was still completely bewildered.

"That means these people have to find some remote places to live in our underworld. But many of them are used to a life of luxury, and a regular two-bedroom apartment is not enough for them. So, the prefect in charge of land planning made an exception and built a few small villas for some of them..."

"What does this have to do with me?"

“Once these villas started being built, there was no stopping them. These people already had wealthy descendants and spent a lot of money on New Year's gifts. You know, the magistrate sometimes needed some money to cover his expenses when entertaining guests, so he secretly accepted some benefits from them…” The unidentified ugly woman paused:

"So the small villas were turned into big villas, and the big villas were turned into manors. They all competed to build them. But the underworld is only a tiny place. In the end, the gate of the Yama King's Palace was marked with the word 'demolish' and a circle was drawn around it."

"I'm asking about my business. What does your corruption and bribery underground have to do with me? How did I even travel through time?"

"You were sent to the Ming Dynasty because the judge accidentally accidentally deleted you. He was drunk and playing on Douyin (TikTok) at night when a pop-up message appeared on his phone saying your lifespan was coming to an end. He intended to terminate your lifespan, but his hand slipped... and he ended up giving you nearly five hundred years of lifespan. So we had no choice but to send you to the Ming Dynasty."

This reason was like a fishbone stuck in Xiao Liu's young heart, who was only twenty-seven years old. After a long silence, he said, "You guys are really keeping up with the times, you even have Douyin! So, you came to me to help me with my return trip?"

The ugly woman narrowed her large and small eyes and said earnestly, "The Heavenly Court investigated the matter of the prefect approving the land, so King Yama had to let those who had bribed him go into hiding. That's when he thought of you..."

"What does this have to do with me?" Xiao Liu said nonchalantly, pursing his lips.

"Nonsense, in all these years, the Netherworld has only produced one person who has transcended the Three Realms and is not subject to the Five Elements. Even the Heavenly Court cannot find any record of you. If they don't hide here, where else can they hide?"

He stared intently at the ugly woman's pair of rat-like eyes, but in his mind he was plotting: Don't give me that high-sounding talk about the magistrate taking bribes. To put it bluntly, isn't it just that the King of Hell has a pile of shit on his butt and is looking for a magistrate to take the blame, so that he can temporarily transfer the evidence and avoid the limelight?

"I won't do it! I will never condone this corrupt and evil trend of embezzlement and bribery!" Xiao Liu said, glancing at the ugly woman while pursing his lips.

"Young comrade, you'd better think this through. If the King of Hell and the Prefect get into trouble, they'll definitely expose your slip of the tongue. Then... hehe, you'll really die of old age!"

The threat of red fruit!

Shen Xiaoliu felt himself instantly cowering, and then adopted a tone of negotiation: "Um, what do these important people you mentioned need me to do when they come here?"

"King Yama has temporarily appointed you as the judge between Yin and Yang. You can decide whether to sentence the people sent to you to remain alive or to perish forever. It's up to you to decide," the ugly woman said, picking at her fingers and giving a dismissive reply.

Shen Xiaoliu's mouth dropped open: "Will you decide?"

"It means you either have to let the people you sent stay here, or you can be sentenced to eternal damnation, understand?" The ugly woman tried to open her eyes wide as she looked at Shen Xiaoliu.

"I get it, King Yama just doesn't want to see this evidence in the underworld."

The unattractive woman said somewhat helplessly, "That's about the gist of it."

Xiao Liu tried to force a smile: "Miss, Miss, does this count as helping you destroy evidence and embezzling public funds?"

The ugly woman glanced at Shen Xiaoliu sideways and said, "Tell me, what benefits do you want?"

Xiao Liu's face instantly lit up with a smile: "You see, it's so much easier working with smart people! I want to go back to 2018!"

The ugly woman's face turned cold: "Don't count on it, it's hopeless," her answer was decisive.

"So how much will you give them for living expenses and food every day? Let me make this clear first, I don't accept ghost money. This place only accepts golden and white ingots!"

Shen Xiaoliu's words were very firm, and at this critical juncture, the firmer the stance, the more likely it is to draw blood. Those who want to get away quickly are the ones taking the bribes, but Xiaoliu isn't in a hurry. Actually, this can't really be considered extortion:

Look at those transmigrators, they're rich, they have girls, and they all carry around some god-level system or something...

And what about Xiao Liu? Three dilapidated thatched huts and a roasted sweet potato!

To everyone's surprise, this hideous, sometimes male and sometimes female face hurriedly waved his hands and said, "No, I can't help it. Given the current situation in the underworld, the accounts of King Yama and the Prefect have long been frozen. Where am I going to find you living expenses and food expenses? Besides, if the person I brought is found guilty, he will only stay with you for one day at most!"

"But I..."

"Don't say anymore, it's just this... I'm just a messenger, if you agree... I'll send someone over in a bit."

"What if the young master doesn't agree?"

"I won't agree... If you don't agree, then just wait for the magistrate to confess that he accidentally slipped up, and the Heavenly Court will annihilate the soul and spirit of a monster like you who can live for over five hundred years." The bitter-faced man put his hands behind his back, ignored Xiao Liu, and looked up at the distant mountains setting in the west.

This bastard actually pouted and started admiring the scenery...

But his words "utterly destroyed" really made Shen Xiaoliu's liver tremble!

Based on the principle of "choosing the lesser of two evils," and the guiding principle of "never getting into a fight with a leader" accumulated over many years, Xiao Liu quickly stepped forward, smiling obsequiously, and said:

“Look at you, you’re an old cadre, don’t get angry with a nobody like me, or you’ll ruin your health.”

The ugly woman looked at Xiao Liu with a half-smile: "Heh, you've got a sweet tongue. This immortal can give you some good stuff as a personal reward, do you want some?"

"Yes yes yes yes yes..."

The ugly girl raised her small, dirty hand, pointed at her toes, and slapped Shen Xiaoliu on the back of the head...

This happened yesterday. The ugly woman didn't even leave her name or contact information. She just turned around and said, "Go home and wait for my news," before wiggling her hips and leaving!

Then, based on her impression of this person, the ugly girl was given a name by Xiao Liu: "Huang Simao".

Then, Shen Xiaoliu didn't sleep well all night. Strangely enough, there was a "ding-ding-ding" sound in his head all night long, like a bowl being banged.

The next day, just as dawn broke, Huang Simao led a big, stocky man with a face as thick as Shen Xiaoliu's, standing at the door of his thatched shed. Huang Simao put the stocky man's big hand on Shen Xiaoliu's arm and said, "That's him. His name is Li Zicheng. You decide what to do!"

Xiao Liu looked cautiously at the three figures on the ground before feeling slightly more at ease: "Cheng...Brother Cheng, right? Um, if I may ask, are they human or ghosts?"

The burly, country bumpkin replied with only one word in a muffled voice: "Human."