Rebirth to Save Myself

Did Su Xia hate? She used to hate. She hated her parents, her grandmother, and herself for being a girl. She constantly tried to please her parents, hoping to hear words of praise from them. But nothing came of it. When she did well, they told her to keep trying; when she didn't, they said that was just her nature, and that she had been deliberately hiding it all along.

Gradually, she developed a people-pleasing personality, constantly observing whether her words and actions bothered others. She found it difficult to refuse requests, even those she couldn't fulfill. Once she refused someone, she felt immense guilt and distress, fearing that this refusal would cause others to become less friendly towards her.

However, you can't keep friends this way; you'll only be treated like a sucker. Once you're no longer of any use to them, they can ruthlessly abandon you. They'll ignore your pleas and might even tell others, "See? She's just shameless. Even after all that treatment, she's still shamelessly chasing after you."

So Su Xia understood. Instead of passively being chosen by others, why not take the initiative? No one in this world is indispensable; she can eat by herself, shop by herself, go to the movies by herself, and commute to get off work by herself. At first, she might feel uncomfortable, thinking that strangers would look at her strangely, but she hadn't done anything wrong, so why be afraid or timid?

"That's so stupid. It's not so easy to change everyone's mind." Chen Yuan hugged Su Xia from behind, burying her head in her back to comfort her.

"It's okay, it's all in the past, it's not important anymore." Su Xia patted Chen Yuan's hand, telling her not to be sad for herself.

“Yes, you still have me.” Chen Yuan nodded.

"Go to sleep, tomorrow is another day."

"it is good."

The next day, when Lu Jingnian saw Su Xia, he felt that something was different about her. But he couldn't quite put his finger on it. She greeted him with a bright smile, "Good morning!"

"Good morning, is something good happening?" Lu Jingnian greeted him with a smile.

"No, why do you ask?" Su Xia shook her head, then sat down and took out her books.

"You seem quite happy today, you've been smiling the whole time." Lu Jingnian also said that it was nothing, you're usually expressionless, so it's quite rare to see you smiling today.

"No, let's start learning."

"Row."

When Su Xia woke up at the age of five, she always felt like she didn't belong to this world. Although she tried her best to live, she still lacked a sense of belonging. It's impossible for her not to hate her parents; after experiencing such cruel words, it's not easy to let go. On the surface, she had a good relationship with Chen Yuan's family, even calling Chen Jianguo and Chen Chunqi "Mom and Dad," but deep down, she still saw them as people she could help.

Chen Jianguo and his family treated her well, providing her with food and clothing, and in return, she shared her business knowledge with Chen Jianguo. This way, they were even, and she planned to leave the Chen family once she reached adulthood and was capable of doing so. Therefore, Su Xia always gave the impression of being a cold and aloof person, seemingly uninterested in anything, and speaking calmly and slowly, like an elderly person in their twilight years.

After her late-night conversation with Chen Yuan yesterday, she felt she had a deeper understanding of the world and a slight sense of belonging. Not only Lu Jingnian noticed Su Xia's changes, but Chen Yuan and the others also saw them. They felt that Su Xia's changes weren't the bad kind, so there was no need to remind her or think she was acting inappropriately.

This year, Chen Yuan's family chose to stay in the provincial capital instead of going back home for the Spring Festival. Su Xia also stayed, telling her parents that the studies at No. 1 High School were demanding and she might need extra lessons. Her parents didn't say anything about her studies, or perhaps they felt Su Xia wasn't a big deal with the Chen family, so they agreed.

As the Lunar New Year approached, the family prepared various New Year's goods, including chicken, duck, fish, meat, and fruit. They also prepared some New Year's gifts for Chen Jianguo's business partners, and had Su Xia and Chen Yuan deliver them to Lu Jingnian's family.

"Oh, it's you two! Come in, come in. Niannian, come and get your things." Xie Yuezhi called out to Lu Jingnian inside the house as she invited the two of them in.

"No need, Aunt Xie. We'll head back after we drop it off, we won't go in." Su Xia handed the things to Lu Jingnian, who had come over, and then prepared to pull Chen Yuan away.

"Don't be so formal, we're not strangers. Besides, if we weren't familiar, why would we send you guys to deliver New Year's gifts?" Xie Yuezhi didn't care about Su Xia and kept pulling Chen Yuan inside.

Chen Yuan didn't refuse, and even turned to Su Xia to ask, "Didn't Mom and Dad tell us to stay for a while?"

"Come in, have some fruit and tea," Lu Jingnian said to Su Xia.

Seeing that everyone was looking at her, Su Xia felt embarrassed to continue insisting on leaving and planned to change into disposable slippers for the guests, but Xie Yuezhi stopped her.

“Those are for the guests, you wear these. And you, Yuanyuan, you wear these.” Xie Yuezhi pulled out two pairs of fluffy slippers from the shoe cabinet as if by magic.

"So cute, thank you Auntie." Chen Yuan happily put on her shoes and went into the living room.

"What are you standing there for? Come on in!" Xie Yuezhi called out to Su Xia again.

Su Xia could only smile, put on her slippers, and went inside. As soon as they entered, the nanny brought out the washed fruit and asked Chen Yuan and Su Xia what they would like to drink.

"Warm water is fine." Su Xia nodded and said thank you.

“Me too,” Chen Yuan raised her hand in response.

"Okay." A moment later, the nanny brought over two glasses of water.

"Where are you spending Chinese New Year this year?" Xie Yuezhi asked.

“We plan to stay here,” Chen Yuan asked obediently.

“That’s great, we’ll celebrate here too. We were originally going to spend the Lunar New Year at my maternal grandparents’ house this year, but his uncle took his grandparents to Sanya, so we’re planning to celebrate the New Year at home by ourselves,” Xie Yuezhi said.

"Then why don't you go to Lu Jingnian's grandparents' house for the New Year?" Chen Yuan asked curiously. If you don't go to your maternal grandparents' house, you can go to your paternal grandparents' house. Could it be that he has some kind of secret like her?

“My grandparents like to travel and are often not at home,” Lu Jingnian replied. After retiring, his grandparents refused to stay idle and travel around, and even their former employers refused to rehire them.

“His grandparents can’t stay idle, and they feel they didn’t travel much when they were young, so they use their retirement pension to travel around. When I called them the day before yesterday, they were still looking at ice sculptures in the three northeastern provinces. I’m not sure if they’ll come back for the New Year,” Xie Yuezhi said with a smile.

Her parents-in-law were both leaders in state-owned enterprises, and their company offered to rehire them even before they retired. However, her father-in-law said that he was too busy with work when he was younger and hadn't taken his mother-in-law out much, and she was envious of others who frequently posted on social media. So, as soon as they retired, while they were still in good health, he immediately took his mother-in-law on a trip.

Neither Lu Zhongqing nor his elder brother Lu Zhongcheng objected, feeling it was a good thing that their father could walk. They figured they could just spend a little more money to get him a first-class flight for better comfort. Lu Zhongqing's elder brother followed in their parents' footsteps into politics and is now a provincial leader, while Lu Zhongqing went into business.

"Oh, I see." Chen Yuan smiled awkwardly, feeling ashamed of her behavior of doubting others.

“Oh right, both our families are spending the New Year here, so let’s have New Year’s Eve dinner together. It’ll be more lively that way,” Xie Yuezhi suddenly remembered and happily suggested.

“I think so too. There’s not much of a dynamic between the three of us.” Lu Zhongqing nodded in agreement.

"Ah, well, we can't decide that," Su Xia said with difficulty.

“This isn’t something for a child like you to worry about. I’ll call Jianguo right now.” Lu Zhongqing expressed his understanding and went to his room to make the call. He came out a little while later and said to them, “He agreed. We’ll see if we can eat together at their house.”

"Perfect." Xie Yuezhi was also happy. This year, with only the three of them and no need to visit relatives, it was already quite boring. Her sisters all have families, and during the New Year they are busy visiting each other's families, so she felt embarrassed to ask them to go out at this time. It just so happens that their family is spending the New Year in the provincial capital, which is like a pillow delivered just when you're sleepy.

After Su Xia and Chen Yuan returned home, Chen Jianguo and Chen Chunqi discussed what to have for New Year's Eve dinner. Since it was just the four of them, there weren't many rules, but Su Xia suggested hot pot. Preparing the ingredients would be easy, and they could just cook it, which would be convenient and simple, allowing them to enjoy different dishes, and cleaning up wouldn't be a hassle.

But eating together as a family seemed too simple, and there wasn't enough time to order New Year's Eve dinner. The two were really worried. Seeing this, Su Xia said directly, "Why don't we just continue eating hot pot?"

"But isn't hot pot too simple?" Chen Chunqi asked. This was their first time hosting guests at home, and they were inevitably worried that they might not be able to entertain them well and that the guests would be dissatisfied.

"I think hot pot is pretty good. We can get a half-and-half pot to satisfy both spicy and non-spicy tastes, and then stew a pot of bone broth as the base. We bought seafood, and I was originally planning to make shrimp balls. We can also make a tomato broth and have some soup. In addition, we can slice the beef thinly and cook it in the broth. I think that's a lot of vegetables." Su Xia rattled off a bunch of food ideas, thinking that chatting and drinking around a steaming pot in the dead of winter would be even more conducive to strengthening relationships.

"Let's have hot pot then. Let's not make it too formal to avoid it feeling fake." Chen Jianguo made the decision, adding that they could always buy more meat later.

After delivering the New Year's gifts before the Lunar New Year, Su Xia and Chen Yuan's family went to the market to buy groceries on the 29th of the lunar year. Groceries don't spoil easily in winter, and shops won't open until the fifth day of the Lunar New Year, so they needed to ensure they had enough for the next few days.

Su Xia and her friends happily picked out ingredients: lotus root slices, potatoes, baby bok choy, lettuce, enoki mushrooms—all the delicious vegetarian dishes. They also bought three pork bones to make soup, and various cuts of beef, including tenderloin and fatty beef. Su Xia even grabbed two large beef shanks to braise later.

Early on New Year's Eve, Chen Yuan was drawn by a fragrant aroma. She went outside and smelled it – it truly smelled wonderful! In the kitchen, Su Xia was simmering bone broth, which she had started the day before. The broth had already turned milky white. Su Xia was currently preparing the ingredients for braising, such as chicken feet and duck wings, all of which needed to be blanched first.

Blanch all the meats, then wash and drain them. Next, heat oil in a pot to caramelize sugar, then add the meats and coat them evenly with the caramelized sugar. Finally, add enough water to cover the meats. Add a spice packet, light soy sauce for seasoning, dark soy sauce for color, and a suitable amount of dried chili peppers and Sichuan peppercorns to enhance the flavor. Then, let them simmer slowly in the pot.

With the Chinese New Year approaching, most of the nannies have gone home for the holidays, so Su Xia has been taking care of all the meals for the past few days. At first, Chen Jianguo and the others felt a bit embarrassed to let Su Xia cook all the time, but her cooking was just so delicious! They figured they could just help out with the food preparation and the washing and cleaning.

"Xiaxia, it smells so good!" Chen Yuan pushed open the kitchen door and looked at Su Xia, who was busy inside.

"You're up? If you don't get up soon, it'll be time for dinner." Su Xia smiled and took out the breakfast she had left in the morning from the refrigerator for her to heat up in the microwave.

"Hehe, it's a rare holiday, so I'm definitely going to sleep in a lot!"

"Won't Chen Wenwei be upset that you're not going home for the New Year?" Su Xia asked curiously. It would be strange if these two kids weren't all lovey-dovey after just getting together!

"No, I told him what happened. He told me not to go back and to wait for him to come find me." Chen Yuan smiled sweetly, clearly a girl who was pampered.

"Hey, go away, I refuse to eat dog food." Su Xia touched the goosebumps on her body and quickly pushed her out of the kitchen.

"If you envy me, you can date too!" Chen Yuan said dismissively, thinking it was no big deal.

"Dating? With whom?" Su Xia was completely bewildered. With whom?

“Lu Jingnian, didn’t you realize he likes you?” Chen Yuan said as she took out her phone and found the photo in her album that was taken in the car when they went to the beach together.

Su Xia took the phone and looked closely. "Holy crap!" she thought. This was the scene where she was so sleepy she thought Chen Yuan was next to her and had fallen asleep the whole way! These kids not only didn't warn her, but they even took pictures! But the real culprit was Chen Yuan herself. If it weren't for Chen Yuan dragging her into a late-night chat, if it weren't for Chen Yuan switching seats with Lu Jingnian, if it weren't for Chen Yuan, it would all be because of her. Su Xia was furious and slowly said, "So, you switched seats back then not because you wanted to play games with Chen Wenwei?"

Chen Yuan wasn't stupid; she could tell that Su Xia was completely angry right now! She quickly shifted the blame and denied it: "No, no, it was Chen Wenwei who sent a message saying he wasn't used to sitting with Lu Jingnian, and that he would take me to the Diamond."

"Fine, very well, I'll remember this grudge."