After rebirth, I gave up Bai Yueguang

Knowing Su Jing's stubbornness, when Mother Su saw the empty, cold look in her eyes, which she hadn't seen in a long time, she felt that something was wrong with her behavior. However, as a mother who should have authority, how could she lose her dignity in front of so many people?

"Why are you looking at me? Am I wrong? You haven't been home for more than a year. Who are you hanging out with? Where do you get the money to pay for tuition and living expenses?" Mother Su glanced at the people who gathered around her.

"Don't you think I don't know? If you don't study well at this age, do you want to go to jail in the future? Do you want to lose face for your family?" Mother Su saw that the onlookers were getting closer and closer to them. She seemed to feel more confident and her voice became louder.

She unconsciously took a few steps forward and walked in front of Su Jing.

Su Jing's chest began to rise and fall noticeably, and her breathing became heavy and suppressed. She looked at Su's mother who was getting closer and closer to her, still without saying a word.

She was so angry that her brain felt like it was starving for air, and she couldn't speak. But her expression was still tense, and people could only feel her tough attitude.

Mother Su grew even more furious. She turned her head 180 degrees, as if trying to gain some allegiance with her eyes. Then, looking at Su Jing again, she raised her hand, pointed at her forehead repeatedly, and continued to shout, "You're a girl, and you haven't been home for over a year because of such a trivial matter. Do you still have any regard for your parents, your family, or even any sense of shame?"

Hearing the word "shame," Su Jing's eyebrows furrowed, and her gaze was no longer cold, but began to swell with anger. She was so angry that her whole body felt cold and numb, but she could only suppress the rage that was about to explode in her chest and glared at Mother Su.

What should she do? This was her biological mother; she couldn’t scold her, couldn’t hit her, and certainly didn’t want to argue with her.

"You still have the guts to glare at me? Did I say something wrong about you? What on earth did you do outside this year to earn you enough money to go to school? Ah?" Mother Su shouted the last word "ah" and poked Su Jing's forehead with her fingers four times in a row. Su Jing's head couldn't help but shake backwards four times in a row.

A light red fingerprint with a small bracket immediately appeared on Su Jing's forehead. Her nose felt a little sore, and tears welled up in her eyes. She stared hard, blinked again, and forced herself to hold back the tears of grievance that wanted to burst out.

The temperature in December had already dropped to single digits. It was almost seven o'clock, and the sun had long since gone home. The school gate was open, and gusts of cold wind blew up the scattered garbage on the ground, swirling it up and down.

The number of students gathered around continued unabated, each one hunched over, hands in their pockets, stamping their feet in a subtle arc, watching the excitement from a distance. After National Day, almost everyone in the school was familiar with Su Jing's face. Consequently, nearly all the students who were watching covered their mouths in various ways and whispered to each other.

Occasionally, the cold wind brought one or two unclear voices into Su Jing's ears, and Su Jing's heart began to tear open bit by bit.

She originally thought that as long as she could stay away from such a family, she would be fine; as long as she didn't ask them for money, she would be fine; in just another six months, just six months, she could get into college and move away; she would no longer have to become the ATM of this family like in her previous life.

The person in front of me, humiliating me word by word, was actually my own mother! Was she really my biological mother? Was I really not taken away by mistake in the hospital?

When I think about it, my family's attitude towards me has always been either cold or harsh. It seems that my parents have never cared about me.

In elementary school, she was always in the top three in her grade, and her parents never smiled at her. Even when she got good grades, they wouldn't even glance at her papers. However, if the teacher accused her of talking in class at a parent-teacher conference, her mother would beat her up without asking why, listening to explanations, or even telling her the reason.

Su Jing couldn't remember the beatings she received because of her brother, but she clearly remembered one incident when she found her brother stealing two tomatoes from someone else's vegetable stall. When she got home, she scolded him, and her mother scolded her. She also told her to take something home if she could.

At that time, Su Jing was already in the first grade. Her teacher had taught her that stealing was wrong, so how could scolding her brother for stealing be wrong? She didn't know why her mother scolded her for this, so she argued with her mother, trying to prove that she was not wrong.

But in the end, Mother Su dragged her into the yard, tied her to a long bench, took off her pants, and beat her with bamboo strips in front of many people in the yard.

She was seven and a half years old at the time, a little girl who already had a sense of shame. But her mother, her biological mother, unable to reason with her, pulled down her pants in front of the entire courtyard, men and women, adults and children. Under so many eyes, she spanked her buttocks until they were covered in blood-red stripes.

Even though Su Jing didn't fully understand what was happening that time, she didn't say a word or shed a tear while being beaten in front of everyone. From that moment on, she never cried again when she was beaten.

In the years that followed, many children in the yard would often laugh at her, saying things like, "You're shameless for letting people see your butt." Some boys would even, when no adults were around, get in her way and pull down her pants, saying they wanted to see if the wound on her butt had healed and turned white.

Because of this, Su Jing beat up all the boys in the yard who provoked her. Because of this, she became more and more prone to violence. Until later, all the boys in the yard were subdued by her beatings and no longer dared to bully her.

But those vague looks and gossips did not appear again until the street was demolished and the old neighbors dispersed.

If we count these experiences from the time she was reborn, she has experienced them twice in her past and present lives. And it wasn't just these bad guys who left a shadow on her.

Among the neighbors who saw her being beaten, there was a man who was probably in his twenties at the time, had just gotten married, and lived across the street from her house.

Back then, my younger brother was at my grandmother's house during the day, so my parents would pick him up after get off work. Since elementary school ended early, she would usually be home first, with her parents arriving hours later.

But one day, not long after she got home, the man across the street knocked on the door.

"Who is it?" Su Jing asked as she opened the door after hearing the knock on the door.

"I'm Uncle Yan from across the street." As the door opened, the man said to Su Jing with a smile.

"Uncle Yan, is there something wrong?" Su Jing, who was less than eight years old, asked with blinking eyes.

"Is your father not back yet?" the young man named Yan asked, looking into the room.

"He doesn't get off work until six, so it's still early." Su Jing answered honestly. The seven-year-old child was not at all wary of a neighbor she saw every day.

"Is your mother not at home either?" the man surnamed Yan asked again.

"She has to go to her grandmother's house to pick up her brother before coming back." Su Jing held the door with her hand and looked at the neighbor with big eyes.

"Oh, so you're home alone every day?"

"No, they were home at seven."

"Oh, so are you going to do your homework now?" The man surnamed Yan had already walked into Su Jing's house, still speaking in a gentle tone.

At that time, reform and opening up had just begun. As a small inland city, large-scale urban construction had not yet begun. Su Jing's family still lived in an old factory dormitory. The family of four lived in a room less than 20 square meters, with the bedroom, living room and kitchen all in one place.

The man entered the room. Inside was a bed, a three-door wardrobe, a square table, a washstand with three basins on it, and a cabinet for pots and pans. The stove for cooking was outside the door, and the water pipes were also shared.

"What do you want to talk to my dad about?" Little Su Jing followed the man named Yan into her home.

"Nothing, just go chat with him." The man surnamed Yan turned around, smiled gently, but reached out to close the door.

"Then I'll tell him when he comes back later that I have to do my homework now."

"Oh, okay, okay." The man agreed, but his body did not move out and his hand still wanted to close the door.

"Where is your homework? Do you want me to help you take a look? I can explain it to you if there are any parts you don't understand." The two men pressed Su Jing's shoulders and pushed her to sit on the stool next to the square table.

Su Jing felt that this neighbor uncle was a little strange, but how could a child have the strength to fight against an adult man? Even if she didn't want to sit down, she had to sit down.

The man pushed Su Jing to sit down, and then he pulled another stool over and placed it behind her, sitting down from behind her, his hands still on her shoulders.

"Uncle Yan, I have to do my homework, you should go home quickly." Su Jing has always had a bad temper since she was a child, and her tone was already a little bad.

"Okay, okay, I'll leave right away, right away." The man agreed, but his body moved closer to Su Jing.

The weather in early autumn was neither too hot nor too cold, which was very comfortable, but the man's body was very hot, and it pressed against Su Jing's back, making her feel very uncomfortable. Su Jing twisted her body uncomfortably, turned her head slightly, and said to the man impatiently: "Uncle Yan, please go away quickly, you are wasting my time!"

But the man not only did not let go of her hand, but instead moved his hand directly down from her shoulder and hugged her tightly from behind, laughing and saying: "Oh, Xiaojing, let uncle hug you."

"What are you doing?" Su Jing was startled and screamed, starting to struggle. But how could she, a second-grade girl, break free from the hands of a twenty-five or twenty-six-year-old man?

"Uncle just wants to hug you. Your little butt is so white, round and cute. Let uncle touch it." The man named Yan put his head close to her cheek, and the hot air from his mouth with the smell of cigarettes sprayed on her face, making her feel so nauseous that she got goose bumps all over her body.

"what……"