Become a stepmother and save the male protagonist of the painful literary school

Since being admitted to the psychiatric department of Jiangcheng Hospital after another failed suicide attempt, Tong Ruixiao has been under strict surveillance, but it was of no avail.

The summer sun was scorching hot, shining down and covering the gravel road outside the hospital window.

After taking the medicine, the man leaned on the bed and looked out the window quietly. His body under the loose hospital gown was weak from the torture of the disease, and there was always an IV needle hanging on the back of his hand full of needle holes. His pale, thin and sickly face was often dazed and his eyes were not focused.

Although dedicated nurses stayed by his side in the room, they had no idea what he was thinking most of the time.

Except when he was having a manic episode, he was gloomy and taciturn most of the time and would not allow anyone to get close to him.

Only Assistant Li could say a few words to him, and the rest of them were helpless.

"Mr. Fu, you should rest."

Although the hospital does not require a lunch break, Li Li knows Tong Ruixiao's daily routine over the years and still reminds him.

In fact, I couldn't fall asleep because the sleeping pills didn't cover the noon period.

Tong Ruixiao's expression did not change, and he did not move. He was like a cabbage with its core dug out, planted in a field, unable to take root or sprout, only to rot faster.

Most of the time he didn't know what he was doing. He felt his consciousness break away from his body and fly in a certain direction, and then his brain went blank. When it came back, it was already dark outside.

After regaining consciousness, he always felt that this body was not his own and the environment became unfamiliar.

He was a materialist for the first thirty-nine years of his life, but now he frequently believes that there are gods and Buddhas in the world.

Pray sincerely, praying for the return of old friends.

Believe that He will lead you out of the snow, to any place you want to go, and to anyone you want to meet.

But at the same time, he hated the heavens, hated God, and hated the whole world. They had suddenly and cruelly taken away everything he cared about.

His mind was torn apart with pain, blood and snow filled his memory, causing his body to expand infinitely and explode in the air. It exploded into the locust flowers in the villa garden, the maple leaves on the autumn mountain road, the thin gold font written by his mother, the old-fashioned white jacket of his father, the candy in Xiao Mu's hand, and the orange sunset and blue river in Jian Yan's painting.

Every time this happened, he would cry in pain, and then laugh happily.

He has had the happiest things in the world, and it will constitute his entire life.

It is pervasive and unforgettable.

The brilliant and grand memories made it difficult for him to distinguish whether it was reality or a dream... or an illusion.

"Tong Ruixiao, you are really capable. You endured the stomachache without making a sound! You fainted from the pain. Are you satisfied?"

Jian Yan sat beside the bed and looked at him, frowning. Her clear eyes, washed by autumn water, were filled with blame.

He sighed and asked caringly, "Does it still hurt?"

"No, it doesn't hurt..."

He shook his head, trying to cover up his inner thoughts with pale words. In fact, it hurts a lot, so much so that even after taking painkillers or taking a long time, he can no longer feel it.

He wanted her to love him more and care about him more, but what he said was: "It's not that serious, Xiao Jian, don't worry."

He stretched out his hand to touch her face, but froze in mid-air and pulled it back tremblingly as if it was taboo.

Blocked by an invisible wall, he could never touch her hand.

Because of too many admirations and too many disappointments, he now only dared to look at her from afar, for fear that she would break into pieces if he touched her and disappear like the wind.

"You promised me that you would take good care of yourself, but you ended up doing this to yourself. How can I feel at ease?" Jane's eyes were filled with sadness and anger.

He hated to see her angry the most, and his heart ached.

I couldn't help but said in a hoarse voice: "I can see you this way, Xiao Jian, I miss you..."

"I miss you so much."

"You said that neither of us would leave each other, why doesn't it count?"

The woman was stunned for a moment, lowered her eyes, and remained silent for a long time. Then she raised her eyes again and said to him slowly: "Rui Xiao, do you see the clouds in the sky? That is me, every one of them. I will always be by your side. As long as you still remember me, I will not leave."

"I looked up, but... but why are there no clouds in the sky as you said, only a dark mass?"

He looked up, but found that he could not find the white clouds she mentioned.

Mourning and despair.

Jian Yan's lips were trembling and he couldn't utter a word.

She looked at everything around her that was becoming increasingly blurry, and realized that all his struggles were in vain.

Said bitterly: "I can't leave you..."

"Tong Ruixiao, it's time for you to wake up."

Tong Ruixiao was enveloped by a surging fear, and he opened his eyes and saw the result of the snow-white ceiling countless times. The mask of the ventilator was so familiar that he shed tears of sorrow.

He discovered that as long as he felt enough pain, he could see her and his parents and children, so he tried every means to obtain the medicine of pain.

Abuse and torture yourself extremely.

Hope to meet her.

She would get angry every time, angry that he didn't take good care of herself, but his only request was to see her.

So he looked at her deeply, with a happy and heart-wrenching smile on his face, and said to her apologetically: "I'm sorry, I disappoint you again. Forgive me, okay?"

Summer passed away as quickly as a leaf turning yellow, but Tong Ruixiao survived after countless rescue efforts.

Because of his identity, he would not be isolated or controlled, which gave rise to countless opportunities for him to die in opportunistic ways.

From taking pills at first to going on a hunger strike now, time and time again.

People's mental and physical endurance is limited.

But the pain is as infinite as the expansion of gas.

"Did this operation really cause him to completely lose his memory?"

"I can't guarantee it, but this is the only way Mr. Tong can be in his current state."

Tong Ruixiao was lying in the operating room, semi-conscious, and heard Assistant Li talking to the surgeon.

He was so frightened that his heart was trembling. He wanted to struggle, but he could not control his sleeping body.

A howl of fear and anger in the depths of my heart.

He doesn't want to forget!

Don't forget him!

The feeling of memory disappearing is like a veil covering the mind, separating the pain into a vague blank.

The bright red pool of blood gradually turned into a misty pink color, the flying snow dissipated, and the fallen maple leaves returned to the trees again.

The person drawing on the small garden chair was erased by the eraser, leaving only the lonely drawing board.

The space was twisting and changing, and the camera installed in the bedroom for fear that he would commit suicide disappeared and reappeared.

The names were put into a shredder and shredded into thin blocks of words.

Since then.

Countless voids replaced his soul, filled his body, and took his place to keep him alive.

And he became blank.

"Xiao Jian, I don't want to forget you..."

"I love you, and I still have so many things to say to you...Jian Yan, I miss you so much."