【Historical Live Broadcast】Watching videos and being seen by our ancestors

How outrageous were our classical Chinese translations in class before?

[Translation on the test paper (Liu Bang) Women have no luck

Original meaning: Liu Bang did not favor women after entering the Pass

Classmate’s translation: After Liu Bang entered the Pass, no women were spared [laughing and crying]]

[Junior high school students' classical Chinese translation: The emperor praised his ministers: "You have the talent to be a good emperor"]

[Someone in our class translated the admonition to his son, “Years and time fly, thoughts and days go by” into: As time passes, Italy and Japan are gone.]

[My roommate went to work as a tutor to teach high school Chinese. “The crow has a private affection, and is willing to beg for support for life.” The kid translated it as: The crow has a private affection, and hopes that the beggar will support them for life.]

[Thinking of the "On Horses" I memorized in high school, the original sentence: Only humiliated by the hands of slaves, died in the stables

I: was humiliated by the hands of the stableman and died among the slaves.

In high school, the teacher asked us to guess what “绿云乱乱” means. Because it was not a textbook at the time but a separate question, we had all kinds of guesses.

Some guessed it was a description of water plants, some guessed it was the shape of clouds, and even more amazing was that someone in my class shouted in the midst of a buzzing discussion: "Green smoke is coming out of our ancestors' graves!"]

[The common people eat goose droppings, originally meaning the common people eat goose droppings. Someone in our class translated it as the common people eat arrows used to shoot geese. . . ]

Ancient people: You young people really think highly of us! No matter how sharp our teeth are, they can't chew and chew a bow and arrow into pieces and swallow it.

Besides, bows and arrows are so rare and expensive. Even if we can eat them, how can we bear to give them up?

"I suddenly remembered a joke about Chinese and history in our class.

In the third year of junior high school, a group of my classmates found an article in a Chinese reading comprehension supplementary book about the sacrifice of Deng Shichang (it was written very emotionally), but as we were reading, there was a sentence that said something like "he died at the age of 39." I suddenly had a flash of inspiration at that time, and vaguely felt that the number was wrong, it seemed to be 45 years old (I don't know why I remember this, it's obviously not tested). Then a group of my classmates directly checked it on the class computer and found that he was really 45 years old when he died, and even 45 years old (it was his birthday that day)

Oh so the author of this article is wrong

As a result, when we turned the page, we found another question on the back: The author repeatedly emphasized "39 years old" in this article. Try to analyze the purpose of writing in this way.

Okay, the effect is that you blew up the big brother to death [OK]"

"Primary school Chinese exam

Who is Bao in the friendship between Guan and Bao?

Correct answer: Bao Shuya

Me: Uncle with buck teeth╮(￣▽￣)╭

I just can’t remember it clearly but I seem to have the impression that this person existed. Now that I think about it, he admires my creative thinking.”

"The students our junior high school Chinese teacher taught told us: "But there are few people like us who have two ears." He translated it as "There are few people like me who have two ears."

“Q: What are the similarities and differences between the ancient Roman aqueduct and the Dujiangyan Irrigation System?

Answer: Similarities: 1. Both are built by humans. 2. Both exist on Earth.

Differences: 1. One is in China and the other is in Europe. 2. One was built during the Qin Dynasty and the other was built by Rome.

"Nonsense" [Tibetan Fox]"

The curiosity of Li Bing and his son, who built the Dujiangyan Irrigation System, was like being scratched by a cat: So what are the similarities and differences between the Dujiangyan Irrigation System and the aqueduct of ancient Rome?

Please tell us in detail!

How come what he said just aroused our curiosity was all useless nonsense?

“I had a test on an ancient Chinese essay before, which was about Han Yu.

There is a sentence that goes "This argument was widely discussed in the court, and he was demoted to the right son of the crown prince."

Me: "The emperor changed the crown prince to the right concubine because of Han Yu."

"There is another one by Du Mu, I don't remember the details, but it probably talks about Du Mu's military talent.

The correct translation should be: Send 10,000 people to that place to build a fortification.

Chinese teacher: "Don't write that you sent 10,000 people to build a barrier."

I looked down and saw what I had written: Send 10,000 men to that place as a barrier to hold off the enemy.

And the worst thing is, I am the Chinese class representative..."

The civilians who were building the city walls: Are you serious about sending 10,000 people to build a barrier to resist the enemy?

It's really a hellish joke for us!

I felt a chill on my back, and suddenly there was a sense of urgency to work harder. We had to repair this barrier quickly, otherwise we would be the ones becoming the barrier!

"The Chu people are monkeys wearing hats"

Classmate translation: The Chu people washed the monkey and put it on their heads as a hat.

Chu ancestors: Thank you for the invitation, we are not that sick, wouldn't it be better to use other animal skins? Why do you have to put a monkey on your forehead? Try it yourself, does it look good?

"History exam asks about the cause and effect relationship between the Paris Peace Conference and the May Fourth Movement

Me: China's diplomacy failed and failed to regain sovereignty over Paris

History teacher: [Thinking][Out of body] You are so ambitious."

Emperor Taizong of Tang, Li Shimin: Where is Paris? It’s a nice name. Is this place famous?

Why did our country fail to recover? Do you want me to tell you where it is?

My ancestor sent troops to recapture this land in advance, which can be regarded as a small gift from our ancestors to future generations. (?′?`?)*??*

……

Western Han Dynasty.

Emperor Gaozu of Han, Liu Bang: That little classmate on the sky curtain, please don’t slander my innocence!

Lu Zhi glanced at him sideways: Are you innocent too?

Liu Bang, who was lying on the couch lazily as if he had no bones, looked like a man who had accomplished great things and was not concerned with trivial matters: Of course, I, Liu Bang, am a real man and I should walk upright and sit properly!

I haven't done anything wrong. Even if they try their best to put the blame on me, I won't admit it! | ???w??)???