It's a hell game, who can still be a human being?

Chapter 588: Oxen and Horses: Get lost, who wants to live with you?
"Why do I always encounter this kind of choice?"

Liu Zheng was speechless.

Apart from auctions, the extraordinary items he had obtained were more abstract than the last.

It's either a shit-smelling poison or a BIU laser device installed under your crotch.

Look at the exchange items in other main god spaces, they are so cultural and stylish. Your hell game is really low-level.

Wait, he's not the only one like this, right?

No way, right?

No matter how much he complained, there was no way Liu Zheng would refuse the extraordinary item he picked up for free.

Fortunately, the takeaway had been delivered and he now had plenty of time to think.

The first thing Liu Zheng looked at was the dung fork.

In many ways, he has a special connection with the word "feces".

Even the people around him have a close relationship with feces. For example, the fisherman and the Nile doctor are both masters of playing with feces.

One uses feces to raise fish, and the other uses feces to treat diseases.

Liu Zheng now has a perfect quality "Power of Three Dung" on hand, which may be able to achieve a synergistic effect with the dung fork.

Then he looked at the sickle again.

Liu Zheng doesn't have much connection with the sickle, but his only connection is with Red Ghost, the top boss of the metropolis.

If I ask the Red Ghost for a hammer again, I'm afraid he will be able to directly summon the red light and kill gods and Buddhas who stand in his way.

Finally he looked at the hoe.

Liu Zheng thought about it but couldn't figure out any connection between himself and the hoe.

Oh, it seems like he has poached a lot of people.

But no matter how you think about it, this hoe can’t be a control item, right?
So the final result is to choose between the dung fork and the sickle.

"Then I want this."

After thinking for a moment, Liu Zheng pointed to the dung fork.

"Ok?"

When Volva saw that he chose the dung fork, her expression was a little hesitant.

"If that doesn't work I can get another one."

Liu Zheng took the initiative to speak.

"The wizard's words are powerful. Well, take it from me."

Volva sighed and waved her hand.

"Then I would rather obey your orders than be respectful."

He walked over and picked up the dung fork, and the item introduction popped up immediately.

"Name: Bloody Dung Fork (Disposable)"

"Type: Equipment/Props"

“Quality: Excellent”

"Effect 300: When attacking a target, a small amount of poison damage will be inflicted. If the target is a demon hunter, the damage will be increased to %."

"Effect 2: When used with feces-type items, it can increase the toxin damage or the effect of feces-type items. The degree of increase is related to the quality of the feces-type items."

"Note: When you feel ashamed because you are a supernatural being but cannot beat an ordinary person, just think about this: there was once a demon hunter mentor who died from a farmer's dung fork."

“Can I take out a copy: Yes”

"This item is very malicious to demon hunters."

Liu Zhengxu said with his eyes fixed.

In fact, he really wanted to ask Volva if he had an old friend who was a witcher, but after thinking it over, he decided not to make things more complicated.

After Liu Zheng finished choosing, Tomoko and Yasha also quickly selected their own gifts.

Tomoko chose a bag of dill seeds, while Yasha chose a bottle of oil from some unknown creature.

"Well, you should go, delivery man. Your colleague is coming."

Volva's gaze passed through the wall and looked outside the alley, and the color of the paint on her face became more vivid.

"Thank you for your gift, Your Excellency the Great Witch."

After saying goodbye politely, the three of them left Volva's house.

He took a step forward, and the bone staircase suddenly disappeared.

Fortunately, he reacted quickly and landed safely after doing a half-turn in the air.

Liu Zheng straightened up somewhat complacently, only to find that Yaksha was looking at him with a teasing expression.

"Ahem, I just sat for too long, let me stretch my muscles."

Liu Zheng excused himself.

"Man, you've become so weak."

Tomoko added another blow.

"This is called playing the pig to eat the tiger. What do you know, little girl? Also, don't follow the queen and shout nonsense. I have a name. It's Liu Zheng."

He said in frustration.

"Oh."

Tomoko responded casually, not knowing whether she heard it or not.

"It seems you are not lying, human."

Yasha said, stopping smiling.

What Volva said just now also confirmed what Liu Zheng said.

"I would like to, but it's a pity that lying in the metropolis is too cost-effective."

Liu Zheng said frankly.

In reality, polygraphs can only be used as toys. Almost all the strong men in Metropolis have built-in polygraph functions.

If you want to lie to their faces, you have to be as strong as them.

"Then I hope your pie in the sky will come true."

Having said that, Yaksha left on his own.

"Are you really not going to kill her?"

Tomoko was eager to try.

"Are you sure?"

Liu Zheng asked back.

"No."

Tomoko shook her head.

"Then forget it."

Such a powerful magician should either be killed with one strike or simply not provoked. Otherwise, there will be endless troubles if he is let go.

"Oh. Here you go."

Tomoko handed him the bag of dill seeds she had just received.

"Don't you want it?"

Liu Zheng took the bag and the item introduction popped up again.

"Name: A bag of dill seeds"

"Type: Miscellaneous"

“Quality: Excellent”

"Effect: None"

"Note: The dill fruit planted by the great witch Volva herself is infected by her magic power and has an exceptionally rich and special flavor."

“Can I take out a copy: Yes”

"Well, White Feather Chicken and Pot-mouthed Soup will probably like this."

he wondered.

"I like the Queen, and the Queen likes you, so I like you too. For the person you like, you should give him all the good things."

Tomoko said.

"Are you sure the Queen likes me and doesn't hate me?"

He curled his lips and said.

"She's just not very good at expressing herself."

Tomoko defended the queen.

"You even explained it for her."

Seeing her serious look, Liu Zheng couldn't help but raise his tentacles and wanted to rub her head.

"stop!"

Tomoko stopped him softly, the sharp edge on her body seemed to be pressed against his throat.

"What do you want to do?"

She narrowed her eyes slightly, and they became narrow and long, full of danger.

"I want to rub your head, like between friends."

Liu Zheng said honestly.

"You should be thankful that the Queen ordered me to protect you, otherwise you would have become a human stick by now."

Tomoko said coldly.

"Is your way of liking people a little too intense?"

He said with empty eyes.

"It's Tomoko who likes you, what does it have to do with me?"

Tomoko said with a sneer.

"then who are you?"

Liu Zheng asked.

He already knew that Tomoko was mentally ill, but he didn't expect that she had schizophrenia, which was indeed very dangerous.

"You don't deserve to know who I am. Now get out of here. I don't have time to waste with you."

Tomoko urged.

The edge went down along the center line and stopped at a key position.

If Liu Zheng continued to procrastinate, she would make him her sister without hesitation.

"Tsk, just go!"

He shook his kelp hair off and walked out of Ether Alley with his head held high.

After Liu Zheng got on the carriage, Tomoko jumped onto the roof without hesitation and disappeared between the eaves and tiles.

"Schizophrenia! That's really rare." The driver said with interest.

"Schizophrenia should be common in a place like the metropolis, right?"

He replied casually.

It's such a high-pressure place that he, who has only been here for a few days, has become mentally ill, not to mention the indigenous people.

"No, in the metropolis, simple schizophrenia like her is rare. Instead, it is more common to see soul splitting, rebirth in another body, or two souls in one body."

The driver shook his head and said.

“Is that easier to treat or harder to treat?”

Liu Zheng asked.

"I don't know. When a soldier reports that he has mental problems, the military doctor will give him a cypermethrin, and generally the soldier will no longer be troubled. If he still has problems, he will get another one."

The driver shrugged.

"Let me guess, the raw material of this airship is not 'spice', right?"

He twitched the corner of his mouth and said.

"It only accounts for a small proportion. After all, 'spices' are still very rare. Only officers above the rank of colonel will be supplied with limited quantities of 'Imperial Parker Airships' made with 'spices' as the main ingredient."

The driver replied.

"You are still quite ignorant of the distinction between high and low when it comes to harming your own people."

Liu Zhengxu said with his eyes fixed.

"This is a necessary price to pay. Survival now is more important than life in the future. Of course, we didn't know there would be such a big side effect at the beginning. By the time we knew it, it was too late."

"Besides, do you think those grey animals don't need it? They take more than we do."

The driver sneered.

"I don't really understand your politics, and I don't want to understand. Let's skip this topic."

He waved his tentacles.

War is the highest form of conflict of interests.

No matter what the nature of the war is, there will always be some dirty things mixed in, which cannot be changed by human will or the personality of the leader.

Liu Zheng doesn't want to face those difficult choices, nor does he want to be the one being chosen.

Of course, this is not something he can achieve just by wanting it.

He can only survive first, and then make himself as strong as possible, becoming a piece of smelly, hard shit that no one wants to touch.

"How was the party?"

Liu Zheng called Nightingale.

"Not bad, those kids had a lot of fun. But that old guy kept staring at me, as if he might release a fish to bite me at any moment."

Nightingale complained.

"Uh, thank you for your hard work. Is Brother Sha here?"

"Yes. Teaching them to bake potatoes."

Nightingale replied.

"That's fine. You don't have to be afraid because Brother Sha is here to protect you. When you get out, just tell me what you want to eat and drink. I have money now."

he comforted.

"I want to go home."

Nightingale said.

"Why don't you have a good talk with your dad? He should still love you."

Liu Zheng suggested.

"It's enough for him to only love me."

There was a hint of murderous intent in Nightingale's tone.

"Okay. When I come back from the Shiwandashan Mountains, I'll set up a trap to trap those relatives who want to kill you."

He said simply.

Perhaps Nightingale's relatives have their own reasons for helping their relatives instead of helping others, but after all, Nightingale is his friend.

Of course, it only applies to those relatives who want to kill her, he can't do anything else.

As an outsider, Liu Zheng didn’t want to get involved in the grudges among the wealthy families, nor could he get so involved.

"Okay, then you can hold my hand, walk on the road paved with their blood to my father, and then propose to me."

Nightingale said with a smile.

"I can't tell for a moment whether you've watched too many idol dramas or too many horror movies."

He rolled his eyes and hung up the phone.

You just tease him every day. If you have the guts, go tease the fisherman.

Back outside the restaurant, Liu Zheng jumped off the carriage.

"I'm sorry that I couldn't give you a bath this time. Next time, I will definitely give you a good bath next time."

He said, stroking the pony's back.

"唏伦~"

Pony nudged him lightly with his head and drove off with the driver.

Walking through the takeaway aisle and back to the lounge, the cows and horses were still lying on the haystack as usual.

After taking a quick look and seeing no obvious injuries, Liu Zheng breathed a sigh of relief.

"Where did you send it, boss? Why can't I get through to you on the phone?"

he asked.

"You still have the nerve to say it?"

It would have been fine if he didn't ask, but as soon as he did, the cows and horses got very angry.

"Damn it, every time you leave, troublesome orders come right after you leave. I start to wonder if you arranged it on purpose."

The cow and horse cursed.

"That's definitely not the case. If I had this ability, I would have filled myself with simple tasks long ago and spent my days outside having a good time."

Liu Zheng immediately distanced himself from the matter.

"What kind of troublesome order is this time?"

Seeing that Niu Ma was about to start scolding, he quickly changed the subject.

"Sent to the garbage disposal plant, what do you think?"

Niuma said unhappily.

"Wow, the restaurant can force orders there. How does it know the situation inside?"

Liu Zheng asked in confusion.

"No matter how chaotic the garbage disposal plant is, it is still a metropolitan area. The restaurant can always find out if they want to know. And this order is not mandatory. It was ordered by the person who placed the order."

Niuma said.

"Ah? Isn't there no signal in the garbage disposal plant? How did he order it?"

"That big idiot!"

The cows and horses cursed loudly.

"He found a treasure that can make phone calls from the garbage disposal plant, and he brought some takeout just to ask someone to come in and play Landlord with him, damn!"

"Did you play with him?"

he asked curiously.

"What the hell! Two people were fighting for the landlord. I broke his hand and burned his playing cards."

Niuma said viciously.

"Big boss is mighty!"

Liu Zheng gave a thumbs up.

"It's you, boss. If I were to deliver this order, I would definitely fail."

He continued to flatter.

"You go? If you go, you won't even be able to find anyone and will die in there."

Niuma said with disdain.

"That's right. Didn't you go look for Black Claw boss while you're at it? Even if you can't find the dog, a body would be fine."

Liu Zheng asked casually.

"Dead is dead, what's the point of having a corpse? It's not like Porco Rosso, who was originally a human being and needs to be buried in peace."

Niuma said this, but his expression was not very natural.

"Boss, you didn't go looking for it and didn't find it, did you?"

He said it in one word.

"You're the only one with a good brain, right? I'm going to drill open your skull and see how good it is."

The cow and horse became furious and stood up to crack his head as if it were a coconut.

"Wrong, wrong, this is mental damage compensation, big boss, please let me go."

Liu Zheng quickly begged for mercy, prostrated himself, and then handed over the money.

"It would have been fine if you had done this earlier, but you had to make me mad. Tell me, are you a bitch?"

Niuma took the money and looked down on it.

"One of the two has to be a slut, otherwise life would be boring. Right, big guy?"

He straightened up and said with a smile.

"Who the hell wants to live with you? I'm not Britain. Get out of here and stay away from me."

Niuma said with disdain.

"hey-hey."

Liu Zheng gave a sly laugh and sat back on his little stool.

After sitting and reading a magazine for a while, Nightingale called.

"The party is over."

She said.

"So fast?"

Liu Zheng glanced at his phone. Only an hour had passed.

Although he has never attended any parties, even a spring outing would take two or three hours, right?
"Just experience it for a bit. You're really having a party in a sewer. Only two stinky men like you can stand the smell."

Nightingale rolled her eyes.

"Hey, that's a personal attack. Then let Li Ziming answer the phone."

Liu Zheng said.

(End of this chapter)