It's a hell game, who can still be a human being?

Chapter 384: Rustic Beauty Shi Tiantian
The huge stone man turned on the spot, bringing up gusts of breeze.

The lemon juice in the wooden barrel also rotated, wrapping the stone man inside like a bubble.

As the stone man continued to rotate, the lemon juice bubbles became smaller and smaller, and finally were completely and evenly adsorbed on its surface.

“Hee~hee~hee~”

The skeletons laughed cheerfully and creepily, while their empty eye sockets looked at Liu Zheng.

"Give."

Shisanyao handed him an oversized syringe with a needle.

"Minister, why are you giving me this?"

Liu Zheng asked in confusion.

Could it be that massaging the stone man is too tiring, so the technician has to give him an injection of chicken blood before starting?
"Of course it's for work. You use this to extract the lemon juice, and then apply it to all the places on Shi Sang's body that have not been painted."

Thirteen Yao said.

"Huh? Oh."

He took the syringe and picked up a bunch of lemons and placed them at the stone man's feet.

"Mr. Shi, I'm going to apply essential oil on you. No, I'm going to apply lemon juice on you."

Liu Zheng said while looking up.

Although size does not represent strength in the metropolis, the size and material of the stone man still give a sense of oppression even when he is standing still.

“Hee~hee~hee~”

Although the amplitude was very small, the stone man did make a gesture that should be a nod.

"He looks scary, but he has a pretty good temper."

He nodded secretly.

Shisanyao really didn't charge the money in vain, as he arranged a very good person for him to practice with.

He grabbed a few lemons, filled an oversized syringe with juice, and then searched the stone man's body with his eyes.

"found it."

Liu Zheng's gaze rested on a skull, where there was a slightly protruding hook-shaped stone, and the lemon juice had not just been poured under the stone hook.

It should be said that these guys in the Metropolitan are always very realistic in strange places.

He raised his feet to hold the syringe, but found that he couldn't reach it.

He looked around the room but found nothing to use as a footstool.

"What are you looking at?"

Thirteen Yao asked.

"I'm looking for something to put my feet on."

Liu Zheng replied honestly.

"Isn't the hoof right next to you?"

Thirteen Yao pointed at the ground below him.

"Uh"

He looked at the ladder under his feet and then at the stone man.

"Excuse me, Mr. Stone, can I put the ladder over you?"

Liu Zheng asked somewhat awkwardly.

The stone man didn't say anything, but just silently adjusted his posture to make it easier for him to build the ladder.

"Isn't this temper too good? It's totally inconsistent with the style of these bastards in the Metropolis."

When he climbed the ladder to a position around the stone man's neck, he couldn't help but sigh in his heart.

It’s a pity that the other party can’t speak, otherwise Liu Zheng really wants to chat with it.

Judging from Thirteen Yao's attitude, the other party's status and strength are not low, and his temper is so good. If he can make friends with him, it will be a good connection.

As he thought about it, he inserted the needle into the crevice of the stone.

The needle of the syringe is as thick as a chopstick. It is the kind that will make children faint and people with sharp phobia go into shock.

However, in front of the huge size of the stone man, it can just fill the gaps.

"Zi~"

Liu Zheng pressed the piston, and the lemon juice slowly filled the groove.

It is visible to the naked eye that the stone in this area has softened a little.

"Is the effect so strong?"

He was a little surprised.

Liu Zheng had done a survey on tap water quality and knew that citric acid could be used to soften stubborn scale. He then used a microcomputer to control the water flow and pneumatics to generate water flow oscillations, which would peel off the old scale in the water pipes and keep them unobstructed and clean.

But the water company uses food-grade citric acid, which is equivalent to the difference between blanching coffee beans in water and 15 times espresso.

"Are you weird?"

Thirteen Yao seemed to see what he was thinking.

"Yes, Minister."

Liu Zheng nodded.

"If you want to know, just try it and you'll know."

Thirteen Yao said with a sly smile.

"This is for work use. Wouldn't it be bad for employees to taste it?"

He refused.

"It's okay, I don't mind, and neither will Shi-san. Right, Shi-san?"

Shisanyao didn't give him a chance to refuse.

“Hee~hee~hee~”

The stone man seemed to nod, and this time its movement was much larger.

"Hey, you are definitely really laughing this time, right?"

Liu Zhengxu stared at it.

"Hurry up, don't let Shi Sang wait anxiously."

Thirteen Yao urged.

A higher-ranking official can crush a person to death. Under the double pressure from his superiors and customers, he had no choice but to raise the syringe.

Liu Zheng opened his mouth and a thin stream of yellowish liquid fell into his mouth.

"hiss!"

The moment the lemon juice came into contact with his taste buds, Liu Zheng felt like his brain exploded.

The extreme sour taste was like ten thousand dogs witnessing the goddess doing oral gymnastics for her boyfriend on his taste buds, and the goddess' boyfriend was the upper bunk where he never washed his feet.

“Slurp~Slurp~Slurp~”

Liu Zheng kept sucking, but his strong oral muscles were no match for the exploding salivary glands.

The saliva flowed down and formed a waterfall.

"Hahahahaha!"

“Hee~hee~hee~hee~”

Thirteen Yao and the Stone Man laughed wildly together.

Watching the newcomers being turned into a crumpled ball of paper by the jealousy is one of their signature routines.

"Two old bastards with bad taste."

Liu Zheng sucked his saliva and looked at them speechlessly.

After sucking for a full minute, the sourness in his mouth eased a little, and he reluctantly closed his mouth.

"It seems you are not that capable. I ate a whole one the first time."

Thirteen said proudly.

"Hee~hee~"

The stone man shook his body, as if agreeing with what he said.

"Then you, slurp, must have given birth to a bunch of, slurp, sons."

Liu Zheng said with difficulty.

"How did you know?"

Thirteen Yao said in surprise.

"Sour and spicy, slurp, female."

"Oh, that's right. Hmm? No, that's talking about women, not men."

Thirteen Yao reacted and glared.

“Hee~hee~hee~hee~”

The skull's voice echoed in the barrier house.

"By the way, Minister, you don't have a wife? Where did all these sons come from?"

Liu Zheng swallowed a big mouthful of saliva and asked curiously.

"Who told you I don't have a wife?"

Thirteen asked curiously.

"Aren't you with my uncle?"

"You can find a girlfriend even if you have a wife. Besides, who says you can't have children without a wife? All my girlfriends are willing to give birth to children for me."

"A little brat like you won't understand the charm of mature men like us."

he said proudly.

"hehe."

Liu Zheng rolled his eyes and continued to caulk the seams.

“Hee~hee~hee~”

The stone man looked at Thirteen Yao.

"Do you think he's interesting, Shi-san? I thought so too, which is why I asked him to serve you right after he arrived."

Thirteen Yao laughed.

“Hee~hee~hee~”

"Yes, he just joined the company today. His code name is Renhe. You are the first guest he has received."

Thirteen Yao said.

“Hee~hee~hee~”

After hearing this, the stone man suddenly squatted down.

"Hey, Mr. Shi, what's wrong with you?"

Liu Zheng almost fell off the ladder.

"Look at the top of Shi Sang's head."

Thirteen Yao said.

He looked at the top of the stone man's head as he was told. There was a concave basin on it, with many small flowers of different colors growing in it.

"Pick a flower." said Thirteen Yao.

"Minister, what does this mean?"

Liu Zheng asked.

"Shi Sang was successfully amused by you, and knowing that this is your first time receiving a customer, I will give you a red envelope."

Thirteen Yao said.

"Uh"

For some reason, he felt like he had betrayed his body.

"Hurry up, don't keep Shi Sang waiting for too long."

"Then Minister, how should I take it?"

Liu Zheng asked.

"Just pick any one you like. No one knows the pattern except the stone mulberry tree. Of course, it won't tell you either."

Thirteen Yao said.

“Hee~hee~hee~”

The Stoneman agreed.

Letting the newlyweds choose their own tips is also one of the reserved programs.

“Will there be any bad ones?”

he asked cautiously.

"Of course, otherwise what fun would there be. Don't worry, I won't kill you."

Thirteen Yao said with a sly smile on his face.

"It better be this way."

Liu Zheng rolled his eyes at him and said.

He reached out to the flowerpot and took the delivery slip in his hand.

If the situation goes wrong later, he will beat these two guys up first and then run away.

"Which flower should I choose?"

Liu Zheng fell into deep thought.

His favorite colors are black, white and bright red, but there are no flowers of these three colors in the flowerpot, only flowers of similar colors.

In that case, pick the one he dislikes the least.

Liu Zheng reached into the flowerpot and picked a pink flower.

The flower has seven petals, which are heart-shaped. The filaments in the center are densely packed and secrete green mucus.

In every sense, this flower touched upon his aesthetic minefield.

"Swallow it without chewing."

Thirteen Yao said.

As soon as he finished speaking, the item introduction popped up immediately.

"Name: Shi Tiantian's Little Flower"

"Type: Props"

“Quality: Excellent”

"Effect: After consumption, a layer of stone skin will be obtained, which will resist some damage for the player when attacked. It lasts for the current instance and disappears after being triggered."

"Note: This is a small hair flower, for you, me and him. Anyone who dares not accept it will be sent back home."

“Can I take out a copy: Yes”

“Actually, I think it looks pretty good when worn.”

After reading the introduction of the items, Liu Zheng said.

An excellent pure defensive item is of little use to him now.

But if it is used for the next copy with the status reset to zero, then it may be of great use.

So if possible, Liu Zheng still wants to save it up.

"Is this okay, Shi-san?"

Thirteen Yao asked the stone man.

“Hee~hee~hee~”

The stone man nodded slightly.

"You are lucky. Shi Sang agreed to your request. Why don't you thank Shi Sang?"

Thirteen Yao said to Liu Zheng.

"Thank you, Mr. Shi."

he said sincerely.

"You're too quiet and have no energy at all. With your current condition, do you still want to be a star technician in the massage department?"

Thirteenth Yao yelled in dissatisfaction.

What a star technician, if he's given another 298, he'll be able to take off, right?
"Thank you, Mr. Shi!"

Although he was reluctant, Liu Zheng raised his voice.

"Not enough, not enough, louder, louder."

Thirteen Yao shouted.

"Thank you Mr. Shi!!!"

He shouted with all his might, and his stimulated salivary glands spurted out one last mouthful of saliva.

“Hee~hee~hee~hee~”

The stone man who witnessed this scene shook violently, and Liu Zheng and the ladder shook along with him.

It can be seen that it laughed very hard this time.

"You kid, it might be more promising to be a manzai actor than a masseur."

Thirteen Yao held back his laughter and said.

Manzai is a form of stand-up comedy in Japan, usually performed by a duo.

One person is responsible for the more serious role of finding trouble and making comments, while the other is responsible for the more comical role of pretending to be stupid and acting foolish. The two of them tell jokes to each other at a very fast speed.

In terms of performance form, it is very similar to crosstalk.

But judging from the performance content, manzai is more like a lightweight version of crosstalk.

It has shorter duration, fewer props, and newer content.

"I still want to be a masseur."

Liu Zheng said perfunctorily.

He's heard this kind of talk so many times that his ears are almost callused.

Niu Ma said that he was more suitable to be a gigolo than a delivery man.

The novelist said he was more suitable to be a writer than a delivery man.

Nightingale said he was more suitable to be a board game host than a delivery man.

Etc., etc.

No matter what job he does, there is another job that suits him better.

Liu Zheng didn't know whether this was a compliment or an insult to him.

"I hope so."

Thirteen Yao's eyes were sharp for a moment, then became cloudy again.

After putting away the little flowers, Liu Zheng continued to fill the seams.

This time there was nothing else to interfere and he filled all the gaps smoothly.

In fact, there were not many in total. Only some places blocked by superfluous stones required his manual intervention.

"finished."

Liu Zheng let out a long breath, then subconsciously pressed the surface of the stone man.

It feels a little hard at first, but becomes soft when you apply a little force, just like freshly fried thick French fries.

"Comfortable?"

Thirteen asked suddenly.

"Comfortable. Excuse me, Minister, Mr. Shi, I was just admiring the fruits of my labor and couldn't help myself."

He apologized immediately.

"It's okay. Most new people can't help but touch it for the first time. It's understandable."

Thirteen Yao said.

"So they held back after the second time?"

"No, they will feel free to touch it."

Thirteen Yao shook his head.

"Yeah, okay."

Liu Zheng said with a strange expression.

Why does it feel like a child touching the big, fierce-looking dog next door?

"But they don't actually have many opportunities to touch him, because Shi Sang prefers to use newcomers."

Thirteen Yao said.

"understood."

He understood. The Cadillac owners he knew also liked to order new people every time they went to the old place.

"Shi Sang, are you done with your bath?"

Thirteen Yao asked.

“Hee~hee~hee~”

The stone man made the sound and sat down cross-legged.

The moment it sat on the floor, the whole house shook.

"Okay, now it's time to really test you."

Thirteen Yao said.

“Minister, you may not believe this if I can’t tell you, but I rarely give massages to non-humans.

Moreover, they are inhuman beings without even flesh and blood.

"Many of the techniques used to massage human dolls can also be used on Shisan. You have to use your own judgment. But remember what I tell you."

Thirteen Yao said.

What are you talking about?

Liu Zheng thought about it and then quickly remembered.

"This guest likes SM."

(End of this chapter)