Am I being simulated by their love affair?

"Because no one will die for you."

The girl recalled the night at the Otaru Hotel and what the man lying in front of her said to her.

"Anyway, I won't watch you die in front of me."

The melody of the classical guitar is very light, with a slow rock flavor, because singing the truth does not require a high tone.

"Because she is what I watered."

"What I protect."

“That’s what I listened to.”

"She is my rose."

The fox said softly before saying goodbye, "It's the time you spend on the rose that makes it so precious."

The fox's sobs concealed Mochizuki Haruka's tears.

Apart from handing her the tissue, Jun Matsueda did nothing else.

Don't be soft-hearted, he told himself.

You can't be soft-hearted about things that you are not responsible for. This is the lesson he learned from his first love and the lesson from his previous life.

Mochizuki Haruka once accused him of being cold. He always made them feel warm, but was unwilling to let them feel loved.

However, love is a subjective feeling, which is not controlled by Jun Matsueda. The girl has seen the light and naturally cannot forget that warmth.

When the little prince decided to leave the planet, he whispered goodbye to the pilot.

"It's not by chance that I'm leaving."

It is true, Mochizuki Haruka wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes. A malicious girl once told her that all the things she worries about will come true.

Just like the two people in the simulation did not end up together, everything was not accidental.

After the flash of light, the little prince disappeared.

"The most poignant sight in the world is where he disappears."

"This light is nowhere to be found and is fleeting."

"Please, my goodness, don't let me stay in sadness..."

At 5:30 in the afternoon, they walked out of the New National Theatre. The snow had not stopped yet, still as clean and light as before, but it was falling a little slower.

The two of them were holding umbrellas, walking in the snow one after the other. Matsueda Jun didn't know where they were going. He just followed the aimless girl to calm his turbulent emotions.

After passing the busy Hatsudai Station, the 711-Eleven convenience store, two temples and a shrine, the girl stopped in a secluded courtyard of Meiji Jingu Shrine as there were fewer and fewer people around.

"Matsuzhi, how many sunsets have we seen today?"

"One hundred and twenty-nine times."

"I thought it would be one hundred and thirty."

Mochizuki Haruka turned around and looked at him. The girl held her umbrella very low, and Matsueda Jun couldn't see her eyes.

"It's a pity that it snowed so heavily today. The sky was completely white and I couldn't see the sunset."

She raised her umbrella and gazed toward the sky, and Jun Matsueda followed her gaze. It was sunset, but the snow-covered clouds were so bright and white that it made one wonder if they were trapped in a theater set.

"One hundred and twenty-nine sunsets must be very sad..."

"But why do I feel sadder on the day I made up my mind?"

He watched the girl's tears run down her cheeks and fall on the snow, like dark stars in the white sky.

Chapter 210 The Little Prince

"Matsueda, I've decided to leave."

Jun Matsueda looked at the girl crying under the umbrella.

On a snowy day like this, even shedding tears would feel cold.

"Where are you going?"

He felt that this was not bad. The girl's determination to run away at least showed her will to change.

The two walked to the eaves of the courtyard, put down their umbrellas, and looked at the snow outside. The snowflakes fell at a speed as slow as a movie camera.

"Leave Tokyo and go somewhere where I can't see you."

Mochizuki Yao waited for a while, but the boy didn't speak.

"Don't you want to ask why?"

The girl looked at him, and Matsueda Jun shook his head. "I know without asking that you can't stand the way I treat you now."

Wangyue Yao nodded softly and squatted at the edge of the corridor. She scooped up a handful of snow on the ground, just like she had clenched the tear-soaked tissue in the cinema before.

"Going back to school is more unbearable than I thought."

"I watched you walk through the corridor after class and pass by our classroom window without even glancing at me."

"Watching you follow the crowd up the stairs, you couldn't see me on the other side."

"Watching you accept a girl's confession and reject it with a smile."

"There are so many people in school, so many that it's hard to even find a chance to be alone with you."

The girl's voice trembled as she threw the snowball in her hand, watching it leave a trail in the pure white courtyard.

"But I told myself I couldn't be sad, because Songzhi wanted me to be independent and change."

So she could only fold up her sorrow and put it away, carefully playing the role of a girl with just the right amount of sorrow and useless thorns in front of Matsueda Jun.

The rose must have felt the same way when she saw the little prince packing his bags and leaving, right?

“But I can’t do it…”

The girl stood up and patted the remaining snow on her hands. Her movements were clumsy, just like she didn't dry her hands properly when she walked out of the kitchen last night.

"I don't want to just watch you smile from the outside of the crowd."

"I don't want you to show hesitation in front of me and ask me for help because of another girl."

"I don't want to walk with you in this cold weather, holding two umbrellas, one in front and one behind, without saying anything."

Mochizuki Yao walked to the center of the courtyard, turned around and looked at Songzhi Jun under the eaves.

"Look at me..."

Her eyes were earnest.

"Smile at me."

Her smile was sad, and snow fell in her hair.

“Love me!!!”

She screamed at the top of her lungs, and the pain hidden during those days of separation finally broke out.

The girl let out a long breath in the snow, the white sigh slowly rising into the air and dissipating easily.

"I'm sorry." These were the only four words Jun Matsueda said as a snowball hit his coat hard.

"I know you just want to push me away." She picked up the umbrella that was lying in the snow, and snow had begun to accumulate on the umbrella.

"It's snowing so heavily, I can't let my hair get wet." The girl smiled at him, "I'm leaving today, and I don't have time to go back and take a shower."

"Then let's go back under the eaves." Matsueda Jun stamped his feet.

"No." Mochizuki Yao said softly.

"impossible."

"The closer I am to you, the less I want to leave."

So he could only sigh in his heart.

"But, Songzhi, you know what? The current approach won't work." The girl holding an umbrella looked at him, her eyes as gentle as a fox's.

“It’s not enough to just keep your distance.”

"Even if I can only watch from afar, I will wait for you to glance at me out of the corner of your eyes."

"It's okay to say nothing, because language can lead to misunderstandings."

"Even when I'm waiting for you to appear, I feel happy. I get restless. This is a sign of happiness."

The wind started to blow, and Wang Yueyao's coat swayed in the wind. The snow on the umbrella was blown away like a gust of sand.

"You should be more ruthless, Songzhi."

"Do you know what you did in the simulation?" The girl came closer, tempting him like a snake.

Mochizuki Haruka began to tell the story of that night in the bedroom, her attempt to keep him and his departure.

"That's how you should be cruel." She smiled, but her eyes turned red.

"Matsueda Jun, I hate you." The girl walked up to him, folded her long-handled umbrella, and poked the boy's chest with the tip of the umbrella again and again.

"I hate that you are not completely gentle now, but cold and unresolute."

"For me, it's just one long torture session."

Mochizuki Haruka started sobbing again, but Matsueda Jun had run out of tissues.

"In the end, even leaving was my choice."

"I said I hate you!" The girl glared at Matsueda Jun, grabbed his collar with both hands, and the umbrella fell to the ground. Their bodies swayed with her movements.

"You're always talking about friends, friends."

"If I had known you wanted to turn me into just your friend, I would have preferred to spend my entire life as a waste in your room!"

Mochizuki Haruka tugged at Matsueda Jun's clothes and cried with her head down. The hem of the boy's coat swayed in her sight.

"If you really do that, I might have to consider moving." Jun Matsueda let go of her hand, picked up the umbrella that fell on the ground, and blocked the snow from falling on the girl.

"Give me back my umbrella." She raised her head, snatched the umbrella from Matsueda Jun's hand, and distanced herself from him again.

The girl looked at Jun Matsueda, but Jun Matsueda did not look at her. The eyes are the windows to the soul, and he refused to communicate with the soul.

The wind stopped again, as if it thought the courtyard did not need any extra noise.

"There was a line like this in a movie I watched a few days ago." Mochizuki Haruka's tone calmed down.

"I will love or die."

"How I wish I could say this to you once." The girl looked away, not knowing where to look. "But I can't do it."

“So I can only be more humble.”

She faced Matsueda Jun and retreated step by step to the center of the courtyard.

"Matsueda, I'm leaving now."

"Could you please keep me here?"

However, the boy did not speak.

"Are you really not going to keep me?" The girl's hands holding the umbrella were shaking.

"I really hope that you never had any feelings for me, so that after I leave, you won't regret not saying a word."

Jun Matsueda still didn't speak.

"say something!!!"

"No."

This was the second time he lied to Mochizuki Haruka.

The only sound in the snow was the girl's breathing. When she spoke again, her tone became calmer.

"Matsueda, I don't think you ever wanted me to be independent."

"You just want to turn me into the person I was before you came here."

"You're just afraid to change others because you don't want to be responsible for them."

"I hate you." the girl said again.

"But my love outweighs my hate."