I have a life simulator.

When Kitagawa Ryo came to his senses, he realized that he had been crying. After confirming this fact, he simply let go of all other constraints and cried his heart out. Crystal clear tears streamed down his face and seeped into the soil.

He suddenly had a strong urge to dig the hole open again, as if Firefly had come back to life, just like when she was trapped in the cardboard box in the rainstorm, waiting for him to rescue her. As soon as he reached out his hand again, she would blink her firefly-colored eyes and step on his hand with a look of disgust.

"cold……"

Ichinose Honami called out her childhood friend's name with some worry. In the past fifteen years, this was the first time she had seen Kitagawa Ryo, who was a year older than her, lose control of his emotions like this. This unexpected situation made her panic.

"Hey, Fanbo."

Seemingly hearing her call, Kitagawa Ryo sniffed hard, stopping his crying, but his voice still had a heavy nasal tone, making him sound exceptionally haggard.

"Hotaru, what do you mean to me?"

Hearing the somewhat inexplicable and even incomprehensible question made Honami Ichinose's lips slightly part:

"...a very good cat."

“Maki likes it very much. Although my mother sometimes complains, I can tell that she doesn’t dislike Hotaru. She even brings it some food occasionally.”

"And I was also very happy that Ryo gave it to me as a birthday present."

Kitagawa Ryo stood up. Although he was a boy who was afraid of not growing taller if a girl touched his head when he was a child, he is now a head taller than Ichinose Honami.

"Homami, do you like Hotaru?"

"Well."

The question surprised the girl, but she quickly answered:

"I, of course I like it."

"Then why bring other people along? Does that mean if Maki and the others don't like Hotaru, then Honami won't like her either?"

"Do my thoughts really matter that much? Besides, Maki isn't just anyone."

"Because this is your cat!"

Kitagawa Ryo scratched his hair in frustration, his voice hoarse, but he still managed to yell.

"I don't understand what Liang means. Ying is someone you picked up, and we raised her together. Is there anything wrong with that?"

"call."

Kitagawa Ryo took a deep breath to calm himself down:

"Even without me, didn't Fanbo want to take it in and bring it home in the first place?"

"How could I do such a thing? What good would bringing the cat back home do besides causing trouble?"

As if recalling that rainy day, Ichinose Honami also denied it.

"so……"

Kitagawa Ryo gave a bitter smile as he leaned against the old sycamore tree.

"Honami Ichinose will always be the most sensible child."

He stared at the girl's beautiful face, looking her up and down as his childhood sweetheart of over ten years.

"Fanbo is the best daughter, the best older sister, and the best student council president. Although she isn't now, she will be one someday."

"In short, Honami Ichinose is the most perfect angel."

"However, Honami isn't the best lover... childhood sweetheart."

Kitagawa Ryo put his hand in his pocket and took out a small hair clip:

"This is something Maki has been wanting lately."

"But if I give it to you, you won't accept it, right?"

He shook his head and put the hair clip back in his pocket:

"Because Honami understands Maki and knows that her younger sister is very sensible and wouldn't make a fuss about wanting the hair clip. You also believe that you can appease her. After all, Honami is smart, beautiful, tolerant, and hardworking. She's practically omnipotent."

"But if one day Maki really asks for something, maybe this hair clip, or maybe something else, Honami will definitely make that wish come true."

What exactly is Ryo trying to say?

Honami Ichinose stared blankly at the boy in front of her, who was completely different from the boy she knew. It was even more unbelievable that the sarcastic words coming from his mouth were so different from what she had heard before.

"I thought that even if Maki didn't understand, Ryo knew me best."

"Yes, I know you. I've spent as much time with you as you have with me. Our destinies and life trajectories have been intertwined since childhood."

Kitagawa Ryo stared into Ichinose Honami's eyes.

The setting sun cast a fiery red glow, while Ichinose Honami's azure eyes, like the sea, embraced Kitagawa Ryo's burning heart.

It's precisely because I know this that my heart aches for you.

Kitagawa Ryo raised his head:

"Fan Bo."

"Ah."

"Do you know that Maki confessed to me a couple of days ago?"

"know."

"There's no reaction."

"Because Maki is just a child, Ryo probably knows that's why he refused."

"no."

Kitagawa Ryo shook his head, then smiled at Ichinose Honami and said:

"The reason I refused is because I have someone I like, and her name is Ichinose Honami."

"The person Kitagawa Ryo likes is Ichinose Honami."

He spoke again, as if to emphasize his point, and waited quietly for a reply.

【no. 】

These were two words that Honami Ichinose had heard countless times from her mother before.

Want a pretty hair clip? No way.

Want nice-looking stationery? No way.

Of course, you can't take in a kitten.

My mother spoke so easily; with a mere blink of her lips, those two words could effortlessly extinguish any desire.

But on the other hand, she teaches Ichinose Honami to grow up frankly into someone others can trust, which means she must constantly affirm others.

Can Ichinose help with the cleaning duties? Yes.

Can Ichinose provide tutoring? Yes.

Can Ichinose join the student council to serve all her classmates? Of course she can.

My brain almost completely shut down.

Looking at Kitagawa Ryo who was waiting for an answer, she vaguely saw the kitten that had used its last bit of strength to lift its head and look at her back then.

Their pupils were so similar, equally beautiful.

"No... no."

Kitagawa Ryo heard the answer clearly.

"Well, it's okay."

He heard himself say this, and he staggered out.

Goodbye, Hotaru, goodbye.

Honami Ichinose watched his retreating figure, thinking that if she were willing to chase after him, she could probably catch up.

But at this moment, her legs seemed to have suddenly lost their strength, or rather, she herself did not know what the point of chasing after her would be. She bit her lower lip with her pearly teeth, almost to the point of turning white, but in the end, Ichinose Honami did not chase after her. She glanced at the small grave mound one last time and left in the other direction.

I like the cat he gave me, I like cats, and I like him.

But today, I am still like a satellite, hovering around what I truly want to say, while simultaneously responding to his words.

[Story CG: She and His Cat, End of Reading]

Chapter Eleven: Actors, Please Take Your Seats

[Day 7: Today is Ichinose Honami's last day of work. After dropping her off at her destination, you start to wander around aimlessly. Karuizawa Megumi and Ichinose Maki, who have been bothering you for the past two days, are surprisingly getting along well. I heard they even made plans to go shopping together today. After finding out their general area of ​​activity, you start to consciously avoid them. Before you know it, you find yourself at the park where Hotaru is buried.]

You usually don't come to this sad place on your own initiative, partly because your cat, who has been with you for nine years, is buried here, and partly because of your confession of love.

[You're someone who's received confessions of love frequently since elementary school, the most recent one being just a few days ago. Aside from that 'fake' confession at the stadium, you've faced countless different kinds of girls. Some are outgoing and bold, even though they're shorter than you, they'll still pin you against a wall; others are reserved and shy, their lips trembling for a long time before they can utter a word. But no matter what kind of girl they are, the words that spring from their tongues and the burning passion in their eyes all belong to the innocent, earnest affection of your teenage years.]

Although they don't understand you, most of the time they've simply fallen for a fabricated image, an object created by someone else.

They don't know if the boy likes idol dramas or historical dramas, whether he prefers his ramen firm or soft, or whether he listens to classical or rock music. In a sense, none of the girls who confess their feelings to you truly understand you; they know nothing about your real self.

However, Honami Ichinose knew all of this.

She knows your favorite ramen flavor is firm noodles, slightly spicy, with vinegar, but no cilantro, and a light broth.

She knows your birthday and will prepare a birthday gift for you in advance.

She knows you used to have a cat.

You turn your gaze to the sand dune that has become less noticeable. A year has passed, and the area has grown even more desolate. If you hadn't specifically noted the location, you probably wouldn't have been able to find this small grave.

[Because the large sycamore tree next to it has been cut down, not even its roots were left, as if there had never been a sycamore tree here.]

[You may have read in a book that memories need a vessel, which could be an object, a landscape, or a scent. When you encounter them again, it's like unlocking a safe with a combination lock, and all those memories come rushing back.]

But even if that sycamore tree completely disappears, you probably still won't forget the time you spent under it, just like fireflies that may have decomposed into the earth. Their departure won't make your memories blurry or forgotten.

You touch the beaded necklace on your right wrist. It was a gift from Honami Ichinose when you were twelve. She bought beads individually and strung them together one by one. You remember she initially planned to fold 1,200 origami cranes for you, but she canceled because she didn't have enough time. However, the dozens of colorful origami cranes she had made beforehand are actually kept in a glass jar by your bedside. You would say goodnight to them before falling asleep.

[The memories between you and Honami Ichinose don't need any physical form; the two of you are the best vessel to hold those memories. Whenever you see her, you'll naturally recall the past; your time together has always been intertwined.]

Therefore, Honami Ichinose should know that you like her; realizing this shouldn't be any harder than remembering all the dietary restrictions a boy has ever had since childhood.

The midday sun grew intense. You stood quietly before Ying's grave for a while, then left.

[This afternoon, your junior, Hirata Yosuke, messaged you. He seemed troubled about his university entrance exams next year and wanted to ask you for some advice.]

You arranged to meet at a nearby coffee shop, and when you leisurely arrived at the agreed time, Hirata Yosuke was already sitting there waiting.

After a brief exchange of pleasantries, you begin to inquire about their plans for further education. During this time, you also reveal that you will be studying abroad for a year after the summer break, prompting Hirata Yosuke to remark with a sigh:

"A senior as outstanding as him would surely achieve great things even without attending Tokyo Ikusei High School."

[You noticed the mention of Tokyo Ikusei High School in the other person's words. You've heard of this school's reputation; it's famous for its supposedly 100% university entrance rate and its guarantee that graduates will work in their desired fields. You had actually considered it at the time, but you gave up the idea after learning that it's a boarding school.]

[Yosuke Hirata wants to get into this school, but he's unsure if he'll be accepted, so he's been feeling anxious lately, which is why he messaged you to discuss it.]

You knew that Tokyo Yusei High School selected all new students in advance each year. Although you didn't know the selection criteria, this fact comforted Hirata Yosuke. You promised to play soccer again when you had time, and then said goodbye to him.

[Day 8: Today was the day you planned to go shopping with Ichinose Honami. After setting your alarm half an hour earlier than usual and getting ready, you headed to Ichinose Honami's building. Not long after, you saw Ichinose Honami coming downstairs in casual clothes.]

A pure white shirt paired with a light blue belted pleated skirt, white knee-high socks, and flat leather shoes—Ichinose Honami rarely chooses flashy styles for her everyday wear, usually opting for understated white and blue. Waiting at the bottom of the stairs, you awkwardly avert your gaze due to the angle below.

[When Ichinose Honami came downstairs and stood gracefully beside you, you turned your head back and walked side by side with her on the path leading to the street. It was the season when irises were in full bloom, and on this slightly cool morning, you and Ichinose Honami began your day.]

Although they said they were going to buy hair clips for Ichinose Maki, neither of them mentioned that they hadn't gone shopping together in a long time. At least a year ago, after you moved out of the house across from Ichinose Honami, you two had been limiting how often you met.

Since you had no destination in mind, you decided to board the first bus that arrived, intending to get off at any stop you happened to find and then look around for any interesting places to visit nearby.

The bus was nearly empty in the morning, except for a few elderly people. Most working professionals nowadays choose the subway, and aside from tourists who are particularly interested in this mode of transportation, the bus is rarely crowded. Therefore, you easily found a window seat for two in the back.

[Sitting inside, Honami Ichinose took out lemon blossom tea she had brewed that morning from her bag. A few slices of dried lemon floated in the large thermos. It was warm and sweet and sour. So the two of you chatted and drank your tea together, enjoying the view outside the window in the soft morning light.]

I randomly got off at a bus stop called "XX Park." As soon as I stepped off, I saw a huge signpost. Although it was still early, quite a few tourists and locals had already gathered, some exercising, others birdwatching. The lush forest stretched as far as the eye could see, making me want to take a deep breath.

"How about we hold hands? There are quite a lot of people here."

[When you were kids, you could hold hands all day without a care in the world, but now, you can only offer your stiff right hand to the girl next to you with a flimsy, plausible excuse.]

"Have fun today!"

Honami Ichinose generously accepted your outstretched hand. Her hand was a whole size smaller than yours, so you could easily envelop it. Your hand was a little cold, but you could clearly feel the warmth emanating from her palm, as if warm blood was seeping into your veins from there.

"Yes, I'll be happy."