Band heavy girl? Please stay away from me

"I will form a professional band, aiming to perform on the biggest stages in Japan or other regions. Each member will have their own musical ideals and will be willing to work hard to pursue them."

"Perhaps only in this way can the band support Lin in pursuing her guitar dream."

The white-haired girl said so.

"Also, in my pursuit of a professional band, I will try my best to make the band profitable and earn a lot of money."

"Money? Why?"

Toyokawa Shoko didn't understand.

Although another purpose of forming a professional band is to make money for a living, it is obvious that Mashiro-senpai is in a different situation from himself now. He does not have the pressure and burden of life. In this case, why does the band still need to make a lot of money?

Does Rin really like money that much?

This is impossible!

Lin values ​​her guitar more than her life, let alone her material possessions.

"Rin doesn't like money, but she needs it."

Mashiro said truthfully, the sadness in her tone difficult to conceal.

"Lack...of money?"

Toyokawa Shoko uttered this word that she was very familiar with in an uncertain tone, but if this word was applied to the extremely shining white-haired guitarist in her memory, the combination of the two seemed extremely incongruous and contradictory.

Do students who can attend an aristocratic school like Tsuki no Mori come from families short of money?

Shoko Toyokawa knew from a casual chat with Rin not long ago that Rin would continue to study in the high school department of Tsuki no Mori, so she never thought that Rin would be short of money. She subconsciously thought that the other party came from a wealthy family like Hemu, and that her good financial conditions were enough for the girl to pay for Tsuki no Mori's tuition.

"Shoko probably doesn't know about Rin's family situation, right?"

"No, I don't know. What happened at Rin's house?"

An extremely bad premonition surged into the girl's heart. Her slender legs couldn't stop shaking, and even her voice trembled slightly.

The determination in my heart disappeared at this moment.

Toyokawa Shoko seemed to suddenly realize something, and the scenes of her time with Rin flashed through her mind.

"Rin's parents passed away half a year ago. They didn't leave her any money. The only property they had was a house and a guitar."

"Aside from her deceased parents, Rin has no living relatives, which means no one will help her."

"At that time, Rin had just entered the third grade of Tsuki no Mori, and her family had not yet paid her tuition."

"how come......"

Suddenly, a scene that made Toyokawa Shoko silent suddenly appeared in her mind - a weak, white-haired underage girl had no relatives around her, and was alone, she could only kneel with red eyes and cry silently at her parents' funeral.

After her tears dried, this fragile girl had to face a life with a dark future.

Without anyone to rely on, I had to shoulder the responsibility of my own life early on.

The greatest misfortune in the world befell this girl who should have been enjoying her youth in her prime years, destroying the beautiful happiness she originally had.

The contrast between the girl's life before and after must be more serious than her own in some sense, right?

What he thought was difficult was actually nothing in front of the girl...

But having said this, Kurata Mashiro naturally wouldn't stop there. When she thought back on these unfortunate events, she felt equally terrible.

Ignoring Xiangzi's increasingly pale face, she continued to tell the story expressionlessly.

"Rin didn't sell the house her parents left her, nor did she sell the guitar her parents left her."

"An underage junior high school student chose to be independent, not relying on others, and single-handedly shouldering the tuition and living expenses of Tsuki no Mori."

"And the reality is just as you know, Xiangzi. Rin works so hard to perform, regardless of physical fatigue, all for the sake of making money."

"Admittedly, Rin's financial situation is much better now thanks to her constant performances, but if you, Xiangzi, had seen Rin through her low period like I did... you would understand the weight and difficulty of that."

For a moment, Toyokawa Shoko fell into complete silence.

She said no more.

It's hard to imagine...it turns out that the life that Rin has to bear is so much heavier than mine...

She bit her lips tightly, not making any sound, and a circle of bright red could be vaguely seen around her white teeth.

But what Mashiro said next completely broke the defense of the blue-haired girl:

After telling this story that had been buried in her heart for a long time, Mashiro Kurata tried her best to control her emotions and forced herself to calm down.

The girl tried to calm herself down and not show any loss of composure, but a pitiful little face kept coming back to her mind.

In the end, emotion triumphed over reason:

"I know that CRYCHIC's problems weren't caused by Xiangzi. This might not be Xiangzi's problem... I don't mean to blame Xiangzi."

"But...Rin obviously needs a reliable band like Morfonica!"

The girl's words almost clearly pointed out Toyokawa Shoko's irresponsibility and implied the fact that "CRYCHIC is just a playful band that wastes time and energy."

This is one of the few times that Kurata Mashiro said something so serious, but these are indeed her thoughts from the heart.

The dissatisfaction she had concealed for several months was finally released at this moment, and she asked herself in her heart:

why?

Isn't Morfonica obviously better?

Why can't Rin stay by my side?

It's clearly my turn to protect Rin...

After a long time, the silence melted away.

"I...I lost my composure just now. I'm sorry, Xiangzi-kun, but this is the only answer I can give you."

"However, if Xiangzi-san's awareness can only lead to wrong answers like last time, please...cancel this irresponsible idea."

Without giving Shoko Toyokawa a chance to react, Mashiro, with mixed feelings, left first and returned to the high school department.

Only a desolate and slender blue figure was left, standing there for a long time, unwilling to leave.

Soon, bean-sized tears began to fall to the ground.

118. Crying Xiang, Guilt

Am I crying?

But on the day I quit CRYCHIC, hadn't I already decided to completely kill my past soft self?

So what are these tears?

Maybe... I'm crying for Rin?

When Shoko Toyokawa heard about Rin's previous experience from Mashiro, she could no longer control her tears and they fell to the ground.

Tick ​​tick tick.

It wasn't raining, but the road in front of the girl was already soaked with her tears.

Shoko Toyokawa lowered her head, huge tears fell directly to the ground, her eyes were red, and two lines of clear tears flowed down uncontrollably.

She doesn't know this.

The life of the white-haired guitarist who shines in my memory is so heavy.

Surviving alone, with no one to rely on.

He is burdened with the high tuition fees of Tsuki no Mori.

Just thinking about it makes me feel suffocated...

Through continuous part-time work and the generous scholarship provided by Yuqiu, I was able to support myself to attend high school in Yuqiu and complete my studies.

These alone have made me physically and mentally exhausted.

So... what about Rin?

How much effort and sweat does she have to put in places that she can't see?

No sound came out of my throat.

Shoko Toyokawa cried silently, her hands shaking.

My vision was blurred by tears, and I could only see a vague figure appearing in front of me.

"cold?"

Shoko Toyokawa quickly wiped away the tears from the corners of her eyes and looked up, but when she saw the scene in front of her clearly, the girl's heart fell again.

The imagined person did not appear.

There was only a milky white stone pillar in front of him, which he mistook for the arrival of Shimizu Rin due to the blurring of tears.

At this moment, Mashiro's words seemed to reappear in Toyokawa Shoko's ears.

[But...Rin clearly needs a reliable band like Morfonica!]

[However, if Xiangzi-san's awareness can only lead to giving wrong answers like last time, please...cancel this irresponsible idea.]

That's not the case...

I want to take responsibility for Rin...

Shoko Toyokawa squatted down weakly.

She wrapped her arms around her knees and curled up into a small blue fur ball in pain, burying her head deep in her chest.

Recalling the little things I had experienced with Rin in the past.

Recalling Rin's ever-calm expression and free and easy guitar style in her memory, the girl felt an inexplicable pain in her heart, and her body kept shrinking, as if she wanted to bury herself forever.

The soft and sticky side of Toyokawa Shoko is revived again.

"I...I didn't mean to...wuwu..."

The soft and tender girl finally made a sound, but the crying tone in her words could not be concealed in any way, and it made people feel heartbroken.

Indeed, when she invited Rin to join CRYCHIC, she was already prepared to shoulder Rin's guitar dream, and she had actually tried to make the band a professional debut, challenging the miracle that belonged to the girls.

But it is obviously impossible with CRYCHIC's capabilities.

Some members are not strong enough and are too emotionally unstable... myself included.

His father was forced to leave the Toyokawa family, and he had to work to support the family.

Can't stand the band that just plays house.

I don't want my bandmates to find out how miserable I am.

In order to preserve his only remaining self-respect, he chose to quit the band he had founded...

Unaware of the unspeakable difficulties in Lin's life, she was left alone in a play band with no hope of a professional debut!

For myself...how ridiculous!

"I'm sorry, Rin..."

Toyokawa Shoko confided this painfully.

Tears soaked her clothes on her chest, and her trembling body was shaking, as if she would fall down at any time.

How irresponsible...

Mingming Lin's life is many times more difficult and hard than his own, but he encountered it because of this irresponsible person.

A selfish person, because of a performance, wants the white-haired guitarist who shines brightly on the stage to join the band she formed and build a lifelong community of shared destiny.

If you don’t eat enough, you won’t sleep.

Under such difficult circumstances, how determined is Rin to join my band?

do not know.

unimaginable.

Shoko Toyokawa didn't even dare to think.

Endless guilt was about to engulf the girl's brain, her eyes were slightly swollen, and the tears streaming down her cheeks increased instead of decreased.

Because of a selfish thought, he made so many irresponsible promises to this girl who had already suffered hardships in life.