Anime, starting from Re:Zero (Zero - Starting Life)

As for Teacher Luo Qixi.

This genius gave me a mouse-gray wizard robe.

It's hard to say that she didn't remember it, but it's also hard to say that she has any social skills. I can only say that, considering that this is more than a month's salary of some stingy guy.

As usual, it was time to blow out the candles and make a wish.

Rudeus sat down with a chuckle, wearing the birthday boy's exclusive laurel crown, and jokingly said, "I feel like a king!" Then he looked at the cake in front of him and the expectant eyes of everyone behind the cake.

Rudius closed his eyes, clasped his hands together, and his body began to tremble more and more, and finally burst into tears.

No one knows what he was thinking at the time.

In short, Rudeus's fifth birthday party went by with a few twists and turns.

That night, Rudeus, having understood the code, emptied the box and found a page of paper serving as an instruction manual amidst a pile of iron sand. He also found a dozen or so fist-sized, average-quality magic stones of various colors. He had no idea how Gawain had gotten them, and he didn't care. He only knew he would put them to good use and not waste Gawain's kindness.

In fact, these things Rudius got were just gifts that Gawain picked up when he went out for a walk. When Gawain was looking for beautiful stones in the conflict zone, he was lucky enough to find the extremely high-quality, gem-grade smuggled item given to Sylphy. These things Rudius got were a decoy transported together with the ice-blue magic stone.

Late at night, he fell asleep holding the arm armor given to him by Gawain.

The next day, Rudeus, who thought that the Demonic language was the easiest to learn, began to ask Gawain to teach him the Demonic language.

time flies.

A certain day in January of the 413th year of the Jialong calendar.

Finally, Senesi is pregnant again.

Chapter 38 Error (Please vote)

[Rudeus's perspective]

On my birthday.

I finally realized that I was actually a member of this family, the Greyrat family with my mother, Senice, my father, Paul, and the maid, Lilia.

Yes, Senes is my mother.

Yes, Paul is my father.

This isn't about the things I roughly understood the day I was born, or the first time I learned the full names of my parents in this life when I was a little over two years old.

Rather, it means that I, a person whose soul is nearly forty years old and who was a disgusting, filthy and repulsive NEET in my previous life, who has stolen this body with extraordinary talents and a happy family, have finally accepted my identity in this life.

Terrible, disgusting, and stupid statement, right?

It was clearly my reincarnation who took away Paul and Senice's real child, and it was clearly me who made them have a lustful, obscene, and useless son who was older than them, but I am here saying shamelessly: "I approve of it."

I once complained to my god, Gawain, "Teacher Luo Qixi is actually a very arrogant and conceited person."

I am actually that kind of person too.

However, there is a saying in my previous life: "Narcissism is an experience of inferiority." This means that focusing all your attention on yourself is often actually to protect your fragile and injured true self.

However, self-protection often inadvertently hurts others. After all, humans are social creatures who live shoulder to shoulder.

The Japanese are always obsessed with emphasizing the opposite, emphasizing that individuals should not cause trouble to others who represent society. Is this why they have produced the world's largest proportion of narcissists and NEETs like me who escape society?

So, after reincarnation.

Even if you always brainwash yourself, saying things like "you have to show your true abilities when you get to another world", you also know that such things cannot be achieved overnight, right?

As a result, I used these words as an excuse to avoid some things that I didn't want to think about or face for the time being.

I am selfish, stupid and short-sighted. In order to escape the family relationship that makes me feel fear, guilt, pain and regret, and to protect the fat and smelly self who may not deserve to live and is no different from a rat in the gutter, I have done too many things that continue to hurt important people.

I didn't show my real ability.

Although I studied magic, made friends, researched inventions, and did many things that made me feel a sense of self-worth, I did not show my real skills.

In my past life, I thought my greatest skill was actually ruminating on my bad experiences? Was it complaining about all the redeemable plot points that I shouldn't have avoided, that maybe I could have done better? Because I'd experienced something that could have destroyed my life, wasn't my greatest skill at imagining how to restart my life?

So, I didn't show my real ability.

Once again, I escaped at the most critical part.

For the past five years, I have not acknowledged the fact that I am the son of Senice and Paul.

Whenever possible, I will never call them parents. Instead, I will call them by their names. Even in front of them, I always use "Father" or "Mother", which are very polite but give me enough distance and a sense of security.

I always think:

I'm not actually your son.

I am a thief.

But even though I am despicable, I still want to live, to be redeemed, and to have a better, happier and perfect life, just like the male protagonist in a galgame. Even if I am as useless as I was in the past and have accomplished nothing, there will still be a beautiful girl with silver or pink hair rushing in from the window, calling me "master" or "fiancé", unconditionally supporting and encouraging me, so that I can start over.

But I've already started over! Idiot!

In the past two years, I have always been paying attention to Brother Gao Wen's situation, paying attention to whether he has integrated well into his new family. I also always complain privately that Brother Gao Wen is an unreasonable genius scientist who seems to exist only in comics, but in real life he is almost as dull and mechanical as his comic character.

But I am also always forced to associate and realize:

Why am I not?

This isn't self-praise, but how can those jokes about Gawain being a stone or a piece of wood not apply to me? Perhaps it's just that my nature is far worse than his. Perhaps I don't deserve the same evaluation as him.

To me, Brother Gao Wen is the person who saved me, my friend, a person who shares the same ideals as me, and the person who can lead me forward.

But he is also someone who needs my help, and I think only someone like me can help him well.

I can admit it now.

The reason I wanted to help Gao Wen integrate into his new family wasn't just because I came from a more civilized and morally superior world, or because I felt I was older and more capable, or because I wanted to repay a favor, or even because I considered him a close friend.

But I can’t help but feel that Gawain is a mirror.

I saw myself in him.

I feel that if I save him, maybe I can be saved too.

But thank you everyone!

At least when it comes to things related to my parents, I no longer need to escape, and I no longer need to find ways to protect myself. I have grown to be able to bear and accept it.

I really wish I could go back to the time before my parents had the accident in my previous life.

I really want to say thank you to them.

I really shouldn't have taken my anger out on them in the past, although I can understand how helpless I was at the time and how I could only draw my sword hatefully against the people around me who cared about me.

But I'm really sorry, Mom and Dad.

I'm sorry for being afraid of what you represent. You've always been so steadfast in protecting and tolerating me, but I'm afraid to see you, even though you're gone.

However, this time.

I will atone for my sins. I stole the name Rudeus, so I will do everything Rudeus should do, better than anyone else.

Senice and Paul are my parents.

I am also their son.

——From the day after his birthday, Rudeus began to call them "Mom and Dad".

1 month.

Mom is finally pregnant again.

Everyone was very happy, and my dad was dancing around the house like crazy. Brother Gao Wen and the others also gave their blessings to our family.

I am looking forward to whether the family will have a younger sister or a younger brother. A younger sister would be best, but even if it is a younger brother, I am confident that I can be a good older brother.

My mother took my hand and stroked her belly and said to me:

"Rudy, when Mom was pregnant with you, he was even more exaggerated than he is now, huh?"

I almost cried again.

Dad quickly ran over and grabbed me by the throat, trying to maintain his dignity as a great father:

"Wife! Don't say that! Okay?!"

They love me very much and I love them too.

I will do my best to protect this home.

One night in February.

While I was debugging the magic arm armor, I heard my father, who had gotten up to go to the bathroom, tiptoe into Miss Lilia's room.

I stopped him angrily.

He made up some lame excuses, saying things like Lilia seduced him and other irresponsible and stupid things.

To be honest, I almost went crazy at that time.

Because I was still wearing the magic gauntlet, if my mom hadn't woken me up and rushed over, I would have almost... killed my dad...

I'm really devastated.

Fortunately, I thought that the person who would be hurt the most in this matter would be my mother, so I tried hard to control my emotions. As a result, when I looked up, I found that my mother also controlled her emotions because she was worried about me.

I locked my father in my room with a cangue.

My mother took me to sleep in their bedroom. I cried in her arms until I fell asleep, even though I was determined to comfort her.

I apologized to my mother the next morning.

But my mother gently comforted me, saying that I was a brave and reliable son, which made her very proud and pleased as a mother.

I no longer feel overwhelmed.

I will protect this home.

Chapter 39 Confession

[Rudeus's perspective]

Classes are going to be suspended.

Although I feel very sorry for Brother Gao Wen, there is nothing I can do about it. As a member of the family, or to be more precise, as the only person who I think is suitable to take the lead in handling this matter, I must take responsibility.

If I were just a child, or if I still considered myself an outsider as I did in the past, I probably wouldn't have bothered to stop my father from cheating, right?

But I stopped him.

Although it’s not good enough, I’m proud of it.

My mother is also proud of me, not because of the talents given to me by my parents or the knowledge brought over from my previous life, but because of my behavior, my awareness, and the love she expresses to me.

In short, even if it ends in divorce, I will stay with my mother to protect her.

Of course, that's just the most extreme case.

Because I know that my mother doesn't want to leave my father, she still loves him deeply, and she doesn't want to break up the whole family because of this.

Therefore, I will work on three parallel fronts: protecting my mother, protecting this family, and judging and punishing my father.

Moreover, Paul Graylat is actually a very good father and a very good husband.

He may often be out of tune, occasionally immature, and very lustful. He is an adult with many shortcomings.

But he is still a good father and a good husband.

After finishing breakfast in silence, I went to Brother Gao Wen's house to inform him that I couldn't come to class today. After returning home, I asked everyone to sit together.

I sat with my mother because I didn't want her to be too lonely.

In the end, my father rejected my request and knelt down beside me. Miss Lilia, who was standing at a loss in the corner, also knelt down when she saw this.

To be honest, I almost lost my temper at that time. Their behavior made me feel like they were committing adultery. Fortunately, my mother held my hand.

I still want to make a rational judgment.

It turned out that I wasn't as calm as my mother, the victim.

Then, Miss Lilia spoke first. She rested her forehead on the ground, her glasses seemed to have fallen off, and her tone was as calm as usual:

"Madam, Master, I thought that since Madam was pregnant, I might have the opportunity to seduce Master and satisfy my lust. I took the initiative to open the door. This is all my fault. I will resign and forfeit this quarter's salary. Once I find a suitable waiter for Madam, I will pack my bags and leave immediately."

Maybe he had thought about it a long time ago.