[Di Qiao whistles to] Formal marriage

1. When Jonathan got drunk when he first got married, it looked like this:

Jonathan's legal cohabitant received a text message:

"I have something to do tonight, so I won't go home."

Dio, who was joking with his colleagues, glanced down at the phone, and a few words formatted the liveliness on his face, and an unknown fire burst out from the bottom of his heart.Kaz, a colleague who is also a sentinel, suddenly felt that Dio's heart beat faster and his breathing became heavier.He put the mug on the table and leaned over to look: "What's the matter?"

It wasn't a serious relationship between husband and wife, so it didn't matter if Jonathan didn't tell him about it.thought Dio.

"Oh," Dior suppressed his unhappiness, and pretended to be generous and showed his mobile phone to his colleagues: "My friend sent it."

Kaz nodded clearly, and he said, "I know this, it's usually sent to wives by husbands who don't come home."

Dior, who lowered his head and fiddled with the phone, was breathless, and he raised his head to retort: ​​"I'm a sentinel, no matter how I look at it, I'm a 'husband', right?"

"In the sentinels I know, there are several pairs of guides at the top." Katz winked at him: "Do you want to know who it is?"

"I'm not as gossipy as you are."

"Are you texting? I know that again," Kaz said. "After the husband sends that kind of text, the wife usually asks: 'Where are you going at night?' or 'What are you doing?'" He squeezed Her voice was intentionally squeaky, and with the raised eyebrows on her face, she looked like a jealous little daughter-in-law.

Dio silently deleted the "where to go" that had just been typed.

Katz continued to share his experience: "Some people will ask if they have the opposite sex, but they don't know that this kind of pressing question will only be useful to some people, and some may be pushed further and further away."

Dio looked at his rewritten text message: "Got it, who are you going with, is there a sentinel?"

He deleted it with a dark face.

"The more powerful ones will say pay attention to your body, and then cook hangover soup at home, steady." Kaz gave a thumbs up.

Dior pinched the phone in his hand and asked him, "Whose little wife have you become, how do you know so much?"

"Shit, I just listened to a few episodes of late night emotional radio - so what did you text?"

"Nothing. I went back to work." The heart was pressed and rubbed hundreds of times on the rough straw mat, and the irritability was boiling and bubbling.It's all Katz's fault for talking nonsense, he thought, accidentally knocking over Katz's mug.

Brown coffee was spilled on the keyboard, and an innocent onlooker computer died on the spot.

"The document I just wrote has not been saved yet!!!" Katz held the notebook and his eyes were tearing.

"Sorry." Dio walked out of Katz's office without sincerity, and closed the door for him intimately, blocking Katz's roar from the outside world.

……

Dio was trying a second pot of hangover soup when Jonathan came home—the first pot had already sailed down the sewer.After the doorbell rang, the world trotted from Dio's feet all the way to the door, stood up and patted the doorknob with its big paw.Dio followed the lion to greet his belated mate.

Opening the door, there was a strange sentinel, and the lion immediately arched its body and let out a threatening roar.

Contrary to the ferocious appearance of the world, Dio calmly took over the drunken Jonathan from another blond sentinel.

The blond sentinel was still talking softly to Jonathan a second before he handed Jonathan to him: "I'm home, I'm home."

——As if the house surnamed Brando was the home of the two of them.

Dio put Jonathan in his arms, and the guide leaned limply against him, looking very manipulable.He asked the blond sentinel, "Did you go out drinking tonight?"

"Yes, because the football team in the courtyard won the school's No. 1—didn't he tell you this?"

Dio didn't even know Jonathan was on their academy football team.He said: "Oh, I vaguely heard Jonathan say it, so it is so."

When Dio moved Jonathan's body onto the sofa, he noticed that he was not wearing the light blue shirt he wore in the morning, but a crew neck T-shirt. The loose T-shirt looks like it has been worn by the owner many times, and his bulging chest muscles can be seen along the neckline from certain angles.

Why change clothes?Undressed in front of whom?Why was sent back by the sentinel?Who is this sentinel?

Dio put the dizzy Jonathan on the sofa, and looked down at the man whose face was flushed from drinking with his hands on his hips.Shi Shi crouched beside his legs, his tail patting the ground irritably.

Jonathan still had a little bit of consciousness left. He turned over and was not very satisfied with the state he was placed in. He frowned and said a few vague words. Dio looked at him coldly.With no one to help, Jonathan had to rely on himself. He undid the elastic band of the sweatpants, twisted a few times to bring the pants down to his knees and kicked them away, and then used the same twisting gesture to skillfully take off the T-shirt.Jonathan, who only wore a pair of boxer shorts, purred contentedly.

The sentinel unconsciously glanced back and forth at the large piece of flesh in front of him, and it took a while to realize that this dissolute guide stripped naked in front of others without any vigilance—seeing how skilled he was, he must have seduced other sentries before .

"Hmph!" The angry sentinel turned away with great anger, leaving a naked sleeping guide in the empty living room.

Not long after, a big lion with a blanket in its mouth came out of Dior's bedroom and put the blanket on Jonathan.

……

2. After six or seven years of marriage, Jonathan got drunk like this:

Little Qiao Luno and his snow leopard spiritual body were sitting in a row at the door.Giorno lowered his head to fiddle with the toy pistol, aimed at the little snow leopard, and made two "pops" from his mouth, and the little snow leopard fell to the ground in response, with his little red tongue sticking out, "dead".

The child rubbed the little snow leopard's stomach, and told it: "Golden experience, you have been cured by me."

The little snow leopard leaped up very cooperatively, and ran around Qiao Luno several times vigorously.

"Golden experience? Did you name the spirit body?" The sentinel's father, who was watching the football game in the living room, asked the little sentinel.

Giorno nodded, and then asked the question he had been asking all night: "When will my father come back?"

Dio curled his lips: "I don't know either, your bad father left the two of us and went out drinking with which wild sentinel."

Giorno didn't wait for his father before going to bed at eight o'clock. Under the threat of Dior's "You will see your father when you wake up tomorrow morning, and you will never see him if you don't sleep." Poor to go to wash.

Drunk Jonathan came back before midnight.

Dio struggled to help him onto the bed, and the dizzy guide even recognized his own bed. He asked Dio, "Oh, I'm home?"

Dio: "You're already home. Fool Jojo."

He watched Jonathan's movements. According to past experience, as soon as the drunk Jonathan recognized that he had returned to a safe place, he would be eager to strip himself naked and fall asleep.Even with a stealthy sentinel that leaves him not only with a splitting headache every time he wakes up with a hangover, but also sore in some unspeakable place.Jonathan didn't get rid of this good habit either - Dior called it a good habit, after all he could enjoy sexy Jojo's online striptease every time.

Sure enough, Jonathan had one hand on his belt.

But this time Dior is not in a hurry to enjoy Jonathan's drunk eggs.He grabbed both of Jonathan's hands and pressed them on top of Jonathan's head, which immediately made the guide dissatisfied. The guide asked inarticulately, "What are you doing—" He wanted to escape from his husband's hands, and then continued with his previous actions.

When the guide reported this late return to the sentry before, Dio vaguely sensed the clues, because Jonathan, who is not good at lying, said vaguely that he just had dinner with the visitors of the academy, and he didn’t say anything else. Like a clam shell that cannot be pried open.

He asked Jonathan, "Say, who did you drink with?"

"A visitor to the Academy..."

"Oh, it looks like I'm not lying." Dio nodded in satisfaction, and lowered his head to kiss Jonathan's hot red cheek: "How many people went to eat, and how many sentries are there?"

"There are only two people, one sentry." The drunk Jonathan answered the question honestly.

"Huh—?" Dio raised his eyebrows. He put all his weight on Jonathan's body and asked fiercely, "You still have to sell your colors to entertain guests in your dignified institution of higher learning? Did you still have a candlelight dinner?"

Jonathan was interrupted by Dio to take off his clothes. He was already uncomfortable, but now that he had a giant weight on his body, he was even more uncomfortable: "No, it's not—"

"Then why did you let the guide entertain the sentry? Did he take advantage of you by touching you? Did he ask you to entertain by name or who assigned you?"

Dio asked a series of questions, which directly caused Jonathan's cpu, which was not running very sensitively, to freeze.Jonathan was also puzzled: "Is—?" After thinking for a while, tears in the corners of his eyes begged the sentry who tortured him: "I don't know...it's uncomfortable...please..."

Dio changed several ways of asking again, but Jonathan had completely lost his ability to think, and he could only say something like I don’t know what to ask, and begged Dio to give him a good time with his watery blue eyes, and at the same time The body still struggled a little, directly hardening what Dio rubbed against.

Dio took a deep breath, hating his little brother for not living up to expectations.But he felt that it was too cheap to let Jonathan go.When he wakes up, maybe this person will shut up and deny this.Until he glanced at an item from the corner of his eye.

It was Jonathan's new razor, which he hadn't opened yet.

……

When Jonathan woke up, the sky was already bright outside, and there was a small person in his arms who was sleeping soundly, and Dio was not in the bedroom.He carefully got out of the bed and tucked Giorno's quilt back, but unexpectedly woke up the child.

"Father!" Giorno opened his eyes, filled with the joy of seeing Jonathan's father again: "Father said that I can see you after I sleep, but I didn't expect it to be true! Father didn't lie to me——"

Jonathan held the child's little hand protruding from the bed, and kissed Giorno's forehead guiltily: "I'm sorry, I kept you waiting for Dad for so long."

He rubbed his dizzy forehead and walked to the toilet. After taking off his pants, he suddenly found that he had lost something important!Jonathan looked at some part of himself that was clean and naked, and then turned to look at the trash can next to the toilet - there were clusters of blue curly hair in it.

"Dior—!"

A little golden head came in from the toilet door: "Dad, are you looking for your father?"

So a big golden head also poked in from the door of the toilet: "What's the matter, what's the matter, who is looking for me?"

Jonathan kept the original posture with his back to the father and son, not wanting to be watched. Jonathan put his cold, poor little Joe back into his pants, but the sharp-eyed children still saw him.

Giorno exclaimed: "Dad! Your fur is gone!" He ran to Jonathan: "Dad is the same as me."

Dio also exclaimed: "Dad! Your fur is gone!?" He followed behind the boy, pretending to be innocent and concerned: "It's the same as little Joe Luno, what happened."

Jonathan saw the suspect's complacent look in front of him, and was so angry that his teeth itched. He was about to speak when Dior asked again: "Is it because you lied?"

Jonathan, who was a little guilty, suddenly shut up.

"The little friend who lies will lose his hair." Dio said.

Giorno wondered: "Will Mao Mao lose all her hair?"

"Yes, your eyebrows, eyelashes, and hair will all fall out—if you're lying."

The child's eyes were more puzzled this time, and he looked up at Dio: "Then why isn't father bald now?"

Due to his own reasons, the code farmer + British man Dior, who is extremely sensitive to the word "bald", received a blow to his soul.

Jonathan laughed out loud. He rubbed Dior's surviving blond hair and said with a smile, "Yes, our son is right. Why is your hair still on top of your head?"

……

2. After sixteen or seventeen years of marriage, Di Qiao is drunk like this:

Giorno supported Dio who was drunk, and with the other hand he fumbled for the key to open the door, followed by Joseph, who supported Jonathan who was also drunk.

Giorno unloaded his father on the carpet beside the sofa, turned around and thanked Joseph: "Thank you uncle for helping today."

Lifting Jonathan's two legs hanging on the ground onto the sofa, Joseph let out a long breath: "It's okay, who would have thought that these two guys drank like this, it's really not worrying, but fortunately, Joe Luno, you are more reliable."

……

"I want ice cream!" Dio demanded.

Giorno, who brought out two glasses of water from the kitchen just because Dio shouted thirsty: "..."

"I want vanilla ice cream, or I'll die if I don't—"

Giorno put the water on the coffee table, and resigned himself to get vanilla ice cream for his father.

Jonathan finally recognized that he was in his own home, and began to tear the thick padded jacket on his body, but because he couldn't find the small switch of the zipper, he frowned and groaned annoyedly, sweating profusely and looking very uncomfortable.

Giorno stuffed the ice cream into Dio's arms and rescued Jonathan's father before he tore the padded jacket. He helped Jonathan take off the padded jacket, and seeing Jonathan take off his pants clumsily, he sighed and continued to help.

Dior was smiling and watching Jonathan tossing on the sofa, but after a while, a sentry who appeared out of nowhere actually ran to take off his wife's clothes, and even bribed him with ice cream—is Jonathan only worth the price of an ice cream? ! ?

Giorno, who was taking off his father's pants, suddenly felt his back sinking, and his father said angrily, "What are you doing to my wife!?" He was about to fight him for three hundred rounds.

Giorno: ...

Giorno helped his father take off all his clothes regardless of the chatter of the people behind him, and watched Jonathan fall asleep contentedly, before moving away: "Your wife, please."

Dio walked over and lay on the sofa as well. He put his arms around Jonathan, pressing half of the sleeping guide's body like occupying the ground, and looked back at Giorno vigilantly, as if he was still worried that the sentry would covet his baby.

However, Giorno had dragged his exhausted body away—because he still had to find a quilt to cover the couple.

……

END