Chentan's Memories

No.30 Eight times, the second son expresses regret with a glass of wine

The lanterns in Jinling City are brighter than ever.Zhang Qian browsed along the way, but stopped inadvertently.

Half a month ago, on the night when Tang Yushu's old illness broke out, Shun'er stumbled and knocked on the gate of Zhang's mansion in the early morning, and followed the servants to the bedroom, speaking hoarsely and incompletely, and reported to Zhang Qian anxiously: "Uncle! Tang... ...Master Tang is going to die!"

Zhang Qian, who was half asleep, didn't see the character "Master Tang" in his mind for a while.

But Li Gang, who was still complaining about being "too noisy" just now, sat up suddenly from the couch, his cheeks twitched unconsciously, causing his lower eyelids to half-close, and his eyes looked sharp and piercing: "How can he gone?"

After inquiring about the cause of the disease, Li Wei got up and dressed quickly, ordered Zhang Qian to prepare the chariot and horses first, and then called the accompanying doctors from the side yard.

There were two cars driving to Chentan——Zhang Qian was alone in the first car; Li Hao took Shun'er and the doctors crammed into the second car, anxiously discussing such cases that had occurred on the battlefield , about Tang Yushu's injury, about the treatment of the disease.

Zhang Qian was also anxious when he heard it, but he was excluded from the incident and could not share anything, and he was alone and helpless.

When approaching Chentan, Li Wei and Shun'er changed cars, and Zhang Qian was able to ask, "Is there help?"

"That idiot—he always kills himself." Li Wei gritted his teeth: "It was like this before, everything was digested by itself, and it hurt so much that he refused to talk about it... Now it's all right, small things are dragged into big cases— Even if I bring a carload of impermanent ghosts to help him revive, it all depends on how Lord Yan is feeling!"

What Li Dao was answering was Zhang Qian's question, but he didn't separate his attention from Tang Yushu.

Zhang Qian knew that Li Bang drove Lin Lang away in a fit of anger, and wanted to bring back Tang Yushu, who had bid farewell to him, back to his side—something had to happen—Tang Yushu was a beam of white moonlight in Li Bao’s heart—even if he let him go This round of moonlight is drifting outside, even if this round of moonlight is allowed to fall into other people's courtyards, Li Wei does not allow this round of moonlight not to be collected by others.

Zhang Qian was so familiar with him that Zhang Qian could guess his intentions in every move he made.

...can't stop him.

When I was young, there were always some butterflies and bees flying in the garden of the mansion whenever spring and summer came.Zhang Qian told the young Li Bang that these insects should not be touched: "They have thorns, which can prick your hands and cause pain!" Withdraw your hand.

Now Tang Yushu doesn't want to accept Li Bang any more, and he only thinks about Lin Lang.

Presumably this pain is countless times better than bee venom.

The first time Zhang Qian met Li Bao was when he was 17 years old. He forgot what happened that day and was punished by his father to stand under the eaves in front of the study.

I just remember that my sister was on the left hand and my father was on the right. The two of them brought the "poor child" who was mentioned by his father countless times and would soon come to the mansion, and handed them to Zhang Qian: "It's good to take him to play. Don't bully him!"

Zhang Qian agreed and grinned at Li Bao.

He has a lonely and cold temper, I don't know whether he dares or disdains, but he refuses to say anything.

Zhang Qian looked at the 11-year-old child with an indifferent expression on his face—it was too unsuitable, so he whispered in his ear: "You are good to my brother, and my brother will protect you from being bullied. Can you?"

The young Li Bao suddenly smiled and nodded.

Zhang Qian took out a piece of candy wrapped in oil paper from the cloth pouch at his waist, and handed it to Li Bao's mouth: "You call me; if you call me correctly, I'll eat it for you."

Li Bang said sweetly: "Brother!"

Zhang Qian remembered the phrase "brother" very clearly.

Just a word of brother, like a spell, locked Zhang Qian firmly.In the long years of growing up since then, for some reason, everything he did was just to try to be worthy of the elder brother status that Li Wei said.

Li Dao is cold by nature, but he habitually smiles at people.

Always laugh, to anyone.

Zhang Qian is smart and sensitive in everything, except emotions.

He didn't think much about Li Bao's smiling face, he just thought it was pretty.

When looking at Li Bao in his jerky youth and feeling emotional, he would only reach out and touch his head: "Laugh more!"

... Even if your shallow pear dimple meets the seductive Hu Meizi in the legendary storybook, it is impossible to say who will steal the soul of whom.

Zhang Qian likes the way Li Dao follows him closely—follows him when he wakes up, and follows him when he sleeps; he says "a person is afraid of the cold" in winter, and insists "afraid of ghosts" even in midsummer when it is hot.Be afraid of anything, Zhang Qian never betrays Li Bao's words - what to be afraid of, as long as you know that you are looking for Brother Qian and you are always needed, that's fine.

From a small figure, he has grown into a tall and handsome boy.What has never changed is that he looks at you with those clear eyes at any time—as if he worships you, admires you, and regards you as his whole world.

Just like that, he was followed by Li Wei for ten years.

On the eve before Li Bang was taken back to the capital by the imperial court, he brought a jug of wine and had a drink with himself in the house.

After drinking three cups each, Li Wei suddenly said, "I'm gone...you don't have to miss me—it's because of the loving care of my adoptive father that I only have you... you in my life. In the past ten years, I have only been It is a gift added by God, but this gift is not my normal state, I should not get used to it, I can't take it for granted... I am the general of the dynasty, and I am destined to be a knife."

Zhang Qian couldn't say anything to refute, he just said while pouring wine: "Is it really necessary to go?"

"My father is different from my adoptive father... my foster father is smart, he is willing to be released from ice power while drinking wine, and get a job and rewards to stay away from the capital; my father is too simple and paranoid, he is willing to be the sword of the dynasty, and never I have thought about whether the Dynasty still needs his knife, after all, it is the end of ignorance of current affairs... But now the Dynasty has called on me to take out the sheath, do you think... Do I have a choice?"

"Will I go with you?"

"Accompany me...?" Li Wei bowed his head for a long time, raised his face, and smiled brightly: "Don't be self-righteous—the first time I call you brother, it's flattering and flattering; I'm only 11 years old , I already need to think carefully to figure out where I will live next. I have to analyze the situation - you are the jewel in the palm of this family, and I have to turn into a little follower who only follows your lead, and I can live a good life by deceiving you. .”

These words were too harsh, he directly denied the intimacy and beauty of the past ten years, and interpreted the truth of the ten years as a woven dream.

Zhang Qian's nose was sore and heartbroken: "Why are you bothering? I have always been very good to you, like a younger brother."

Li Bao said that you are so funny: "You are a young man who climbed up from the golden jade incense couch, and I am a down and out under the fence. You enjoy and I worship you and follow you, right? You like me watching you and following you, right? You think these are my real reliance, don't you?"

Zhang Qian was right: "But you want to tell me now——this is a play you have been acting since you were 11 years old? Just to live better in this mansion?"

Li Bao poured the last remnants of the pot into his own cup, shook the copper cup in his hand and nodded with a teasing and flirtatious attitude: "It's very selfish...but this is just the law of my survival. If you hate me, you might as well stand Think about it in my situation—is it the most reliable way to earn a living at the age when you are most incompetent?"

The next day Li Dao drove away with the court's car.

When they left, passers-by crowded around to watch the gorgeous car—it is said that the youngest general of the dynasty sat in it.

Zhang Qian didn't go to see him off, but stood on the third floor of the main hall and looked at the fence.

——The frail and weak child who was always dependent on himself, now put on a gorgeous golden armor, awakened his Nankemeng, which he had indulged in for ten years, and was about to return to his real life with strong fishy smell.

When thinking this way, Zhang Qian felt that he couldn't afford to hate him.

One month later, Zhang Qian followed his father's old friend's caravan, took Lin Lang to the Silk Road, and left Jinling City.

At that time, it was during the years of war in Chengdu.Zhang Qian heard the rumors about General Jiao Li Bun when he stopped in Gaochang Kingdom—it was said that a young and beautiful young general in the Shu region went into danger alone to spy on the enemy's intelligence, or concealed the plan of the rebel army. The heroic and promising legends were praised and applauded by the people all over the world, but everyone in Zhang Qian's side was terrified when they heard them.

Zhang Qian could see through those inspiring legends of heroes—it was nothing more than the manipulative methods of court officials in the hall far away from the flames of war, to calm people's hearts and promote the power of the court.

A weak knife, being used to the best of its ability.

Fortunately, I have been hearing good news again and again.Zhang Qian can breathe a sigh of relief every time he sees the storytellers who tell the latest "Legend of General Jiao" start with smiling faces.

After returning to Jinling, it was the time when my father died of illness. While the funeral was being held, the family business was inherited and managed.

For a while Zhang Qian wanted to take this opportunity to forget about Li Bang—that is the idol of the dynasty carved out of white jade on the temple; even if there is an intersection, he is destined not to stop for him.

But after the war, Li Bao's letter arrived.There are not many words, and at the end of the letter is a sentence "I didn't die, I actually feel empty. Brother Qian, tell me... how will I live in the future?"

Let Zhang Qian ignore the complicated affairs, pack his bags and leave for Chengdu immediately.

When we met again, the cold and aloof boy had been softened by the wind on the battlefield.

People are different.It is said that men who come off the battlefield will become resolute and rough; but Li Gang is different, this man who lacks stability in his heart has another set of survival rules that do the opposite - just like pebbles, let you wear them away , I am self-smooth.

This made Zhang Qian feel distressed.

Sometimes Zhang Qian thinks: I am afraid that I have made a mistake in this relationship and exceeded the limit, so all the love is separated and cannot be obtained, and I should confess my guilt.

When we got back to the house, the yard was very noisy.

The reason is that the servants in the mansion are busy, and Zhang Qian is not in the mood to care what they are doing, so he just walks straight.On the way back to the main hall, he was accidentally bumped into by an old servant. Zhang Qian frowned: "What are you in a hurry for? New Year's Eve, go and rest..."

The old man had a wry smile on his face, and hurriedly turned his head to look at the brightly lit main hall: "Isn't this the second young master who has come back... You haven't eaten yet after arguing, and you want us to arrange a New Year's Eve dinner before you return to the house—you still don't want to eat?" Hungry, how dare we rest?"

"Second Young Master" is a title that is rarely heard in Zhang's mansion anymore. It was back then - when both father and sister were still there, and there was always a small figure following behind his buttocks, the servants used to treat Li Wei like that. call.

Zhang Qian staggered away from the servant and ran into the main hall, his footsteps made his vision blurred and clear.

With the lights on and off, I seemed to be crying.

Pulling back the heavy quilt curtain, the main hall was filled with warmth, and Li Gang, who had found out the old clothes, was exactly the same as he was back then, sitting on the side of the chair and teasing with the servants.

Following the movement, he looked up and saw Zhang Qian who was standing stupidly in front of the door, and Li Bao smiled: "Going out on the field during the New Year's Eve? There are only two dishes left before dinner is ready!"

Zhang Qian covered up his tears by warming his hands with his breath, and carefully and urgently confirmed: "Aren't you leaving?"

"The mountain of swords and fires that should have been passed away, and the regrets that should have been settled have also been settled...I figured out one thing - which bed is the most comfortable to sleep on, and in the end I should sleep on that one..." Li Bao raised his glass to Zhang Qian: "Newly learned - the law of survival."

Zhang Qian gritted his teeth to restrain his emotions, avoiding the situation where the patriarch, who had reached his thirties, would cry in front of all the servants.Just looking at Li Bao, he suddenly nodded vigorously.