i see your calling

Shen Pingge's words reminded Lian Yan of a very small thing that happened a long time ago.

It seems to be a sunny day?Or is it cloudy?He accompanied Shen Pingge to dinner, Shen Pingge put his arms around his shoulders, and said, "This is my boyfriend." Shen Pingge was still drinking that day, but his eyes were bright, showing the unique youthful aura at that age , it was almost early morning when the dinner was over, Shen Pingge refused to go back with them, smiled lazily, and said, "We should give us some space to be alone."

Tan Yun and the others laughed and scolded him, but they still left.Shen Pingge pushed him against the green sycamore tree on the street, the rough texture on the trunk hurt Lian Yan, Lian Yan saw Shen Pingge's face through the light of the thin white water, Shen Pingge whispered : "I wanted to kiss you just now."

Lian Yan's heart beat violently, her whole body felt weak, and she stared at him blankly.

"A lot of things will be lost after a certain point of time, like me and them, maybe after a few years, there will be less contact, nothing is permanent - you said 'preservative' is permanent?" Shen Pingge obviously He was a little drunk, his breath was full of alcohol, he seemed a little distressed, and laughed again, "But I think you are permanent."

That little thing is all.It also includes their kiss in the rustling leaves, the kiss made their lips hurt, and their interlocking fingers in the street in the early morning, like all couples do, they love each other desperately as if every day is the end.

Lian Yan felt that she was the one who was drunk today, he had lost the ability to coordinate and move, and could barely maintain an upright position, his head was messy and disorderly.

He really wanted to be as decent as Shen Pingge, so that when Shen Pingge looked at him, he would not lower his head.

"Okay, then you two go," Xu Bairan picked up the camera next to him, shrugged, "Seeing that I have a lot of work, I'm easy to bully."

Now there are only the two of them left in this open space, at least Lian Yan can only see him.

"Let's go downstairs first," Shen Pingge said, "Let's go together?"

He passed Lian Yan and walked slowly, as if he was sure that Lian Yan would follow.In fact, it was the same, like a reaction developed over many years of training, Lian Yan did follow behind him, even though his hands and feet were as stiff as if he had just learned to walk.

The elevator room just stops on the fourth floor, avoiding the embarrassment of the same elevator.They entered the elevator room, the door closed with a sound, and they walked down slowly. Lian Yan didn't know where to put her hands, so she could only put them in the pockets of the sweater, he heard Shen Pingge say.

"You seem to have grown taller," Shen Pingge said, "It's 1.7 meters five."

Listening to Shen Pingge's words is no less than doing a set of English listening comprehension for Lian Yan. He listened hard to everyone and then gave an analysis. Unfortunately, there was no template for the correct answer. Lian Yan nodded clumsily.

"Isn't it hot to wear long sleeves?" Shen Pingge looked at the dazzling sunlight outside the glass elevator, "The highest temperature is 37 degrees today."

The feeling of weightlessness brought about by the descent of the elevator was worse than the ascent. The sun was dangling, and Lian Yan was dizzy. He guessed that his face must be very red, and his lips might be dry and cracked. This made him subconsciously stick out the tip of his tongue and lick it. Mouth.

Arriving at the first floor, the elevator door opened at the sound, Lian Yan wanted to go out before him, but his legs suddenly became weak, Shen Pingge stopped him in time to make a fool of himself in front of the crowd outside the elevator door, and hugged him.

Shen Pingge clasped his shoulders, Lian Yan got a support point, and barely walked out of the elevator.

The hot wind from outside gushed in and poured into the lips, bringing an almost suffocating temperature.

He swore that his fever was not serious, not high temperature, otherwise he would not have thought—this was the first physical contact between them in eight months, and he encountered real body temperature outside of his dream, which made Lian Yan wanted to cry again.

In the open space, before Lian Yan could react, Shen Pingge pressed the back of his hand to his forehead, and quickly removed it, the smile on his face disappeared, Shen Pingge frowned and said: "You have a fever. "

"Then don't eat, I'll take you to the hospital."

Before Shen Pingge said the next sentence, Lian Yan shook her head and gestured: I'll go home.

Lian Yan almost never went to the hospital. After Shen Yiming left, the hospital was often full of crying and the smell of medicine. He didn't like the smell of the small clinic, but it was better than the hospital.

"But you have a fever," Shen Pingge looked at him, "it's impossible for you not to know."

Is fever a mortal condition?Compared with the high fever, the Shen Pingge in front of her is more likely to bring death-like pain, Lian Yan doesn't know why she regrets—does she regret this meal?Or is it a pity that Shen Pingge didn't stay on the back of his hand for a few more seconds?

Lian Yan shook her head and gestured: There is medicine at home, don't worry.

He made Shen Pingge unhappy again, this was the first time they met after so long, Shen Pingge didn't say "don't worry anymore", after a long silence, he said: "Okay, then I'll take you home. "

Lian Yan didn't know when Shen Pingge bought the car. It was a black car, the seat was heated by the sun, but when the air-conditioning came out, the temperature slowly cooled down.Shen Pingge moved the air conditioner with his fingers to avoid directly blowing on Lian Yan.

Lian Yan didn't ask anything about the car, but she felt scared in her heart, obviously he was wearing a seat belt and his hands were clenched tightly.Fortunately, Shen Pingge didn't drive very fast, it could even be called slow, surpassing the grocery shopping woman who was riding an electric scooter next to her. There was a nice scent in the car, and there was Faye Wong's record, "Ecstasy".

"Don't tell me to thank you too much

The color of the potion is too beautiful

don't make me taste it

Pleasantly numb”

Faye Wong was crying when she sang this song for the first time, and Lian Yan wanted to cry too. He really wanted to touch Shen Pingge's left shoulder, but his fingers only moved.

Sensing his gaze, Shen Pingge thought that he was complaining about the slow speed, so he explained: "I just took a driver's license test, so I might be able to drive... well, not very well," he smiled, but he didn't seem happy, "Excuse me."

He didn't remember the rest of the time, Lian Yan fell asleep, and fell asleep with her head on the glass window.He only wanted to pretend to be asleep, so as to avoid the embarrassment caused by the silence.But he didn't sleep for a long time, about 10 minutes?But I slept very peacefully, and I don't know where the sense of security comes from.

He saw the dilapidated building he lived in, and suddenly his eyes caught Meng Hanwen who was walking home slowly, which made his nerves tense all of a sudden, and he didn't even realize why Shen Pingge knew where his family lived. With a sound, Shen Pingge stopped the car on the side of the road.

Lian Yan gestured and said: I have to go.

The song switches to "3000 Years Ago".

"Don't blame me for saying goodbye to you at the first sentence

Because I really came here to say goodbye to you."

This monologue seemed tailor-made for him, Lian Yan was cruel, and went to open the door, but failed to open it, the door was locked.

"I'm only staying here for a week, and I don't have much time for summer vacation." Shen Pingge's voice sounded softly in the car, and he said, "Today is Wednesday, the flight on Sunday—are you...are you free on Saturday?"

Lian Yan felt extremely tired, as if the bones of her body had been disassembled and reassembled, and the blood was slowly drawn outwards, but it was too late to refill him, so he was not allowed to wake up.Tears are also inexplicable!He suddenly cried, tears pouring out, and all the unfinished tears in the studio flowed out.

The monologue is still in the song: "I really like to hear you talk to me like this

No one will ever talk to me like that again.”

This crying was not in the plan, Lian Yan wiped the tears in embarrassment, making the back of his hands glisten, before he was happy to use tears to make Shen Pingge feel sorry for him, but after so long, he lost the confidence to show off his fragility.When the rustling sound came, Shen Pingge leaned over, rubbed the corners of his eyes with his fingertips, and wiped away his tears.

"Crying again," Shen Pingge said softly, very gentle, "Will you be so sad to see me, so sad that you have to cry twice."

"Then it's gone, don't cry," Shen Pingge left him, handed him a tissue, the car door lock opened with a "ding", he paused, and looked out of the car window, "When you go back, remember to Take your medicine, don't forget."

Shen Pingge misunderstood his meaning, Lian Yan couldn't refute with words, but couldn't move, he felt that he was extremely contradictory, it was a messy adventure, before he could react, he had already caught Shen Ping Ge's wrist, and then pulled it back instantly, lowered his head as if he had done something wrong, and gestured to him: I didn't cry on purpose.

"I know," Shen Pingge's voice was gentle, "No one would want to cry."

"I don't need to explain this. At best, I am your friend now, and I am nothing else. The most important thing is that you are comfortable, and you don't need to be bound by so many thoughts," Shen Pingge urged him softly, "Get out of the car, remember to take medicine .”

Lian Yan felt that he had something else to say, but he couldn't think of anything. In the end, Shen Pingge gave him a note with his mobile phone number written on it, and said, "If you need anything, you can call me again."

Lian Yan stuffed the note into her pocket, stuffed it very deep, and when she got out of the car, she took out a coin, which fell on the car mat, silently.The door closed, and the coin reflected a tiny light.

·

Lian Yan's legs and feet are still weak, but he feels that he has been endowed with meaning again, although this meaning is given by him subjectively and may not exist objectively.

He didn't want to cry anymore, but he still walked very slowly. The sound of the car leaving behind didn't sound until he reached the alley. Lian Yan was finally willing to approach Meng Hanwen.Meng Hanwen has uremia, but on the surface he is just thinner, no different from a normal person. Hearing the sound of footsteps, Meng Hanwen turned to look at him and smiled with yellow teeth: "Your mother is looking for you."

Lian Yan's face was burning red, her lips were pale, and she looked at him indifferently.

"I can't hide it," Meng Hanwen laughed darkly, "Why don't you go back and have a look?"

Lian Yan's heart skipped a beat, she stopped slowly, and then walked back quickly. When she opened the door, the rotten damp smell in the room almost overwhelmed him. He ran to his room, where the mattress was torn apart. When she got up, Xu Mei was standing by the bed, flipping through a newspaper.

Lian Yan couldn't believe it, she stopped abruptly, then rushed over, snatched the newspaper from Xu Mei's hand, hid behind her, staring at her with red eyes.

Why did she turn over his mattress?

There were layers of newspapers piled up under the mattress, and some of them floated to the ground, where footprints were stepped on, and the words written on them were also blurred, but they all had the words "rental information" written on them.

Lian Yan couldn't think, she was very dizzy, listening to Xu Mei's words.

"I originally wanted to clean up your room. After all, you have worked so hard. As a mother, I always want to give you a good environment." Xu Mei looked at Lian Yan with tears in her eyes, "You...you treat your mother like this. What? Why are you looking for so much rental information? They are all from other places, from Beijing, Shanghai, and Guangzhou!"

Lian Yan bit her lips tightly, her face gradually paled.

He wanted to escape from Xu Mei, and had been planning for at least four months, but he had no money, and Xu Mei had also confiscated his ID card and household registration book. He needed to find his ID card and think about his future livelihood.Lian Yan regards this as one of the few hopes in his life, and insists on it every day. This is his whole purpose.

He just wanted to pay off the more than 1000 yuan he owed to Xu Mei. The 1000 yuan was put in the bank for five or six years of interest. Lian Yan thought that these eight months were enough.At least he was worthy of his conscience.

——If there is no accident, he will leave at the end of the month.

"Mom knows that you hate your mother for throwing you away. Mom had no choice but to go to the south with your mother. You won't be able to live a good life. You see, how well you were raised in Shen's house...how can you do this," Tears fell from Xu Mei's eyes, "If you leave, what's the difference between you and your mother who did something wrong back then? You have no conscience either! You're making a mistake!"

Lian Yan's chest heaved violently, her heart beat faster, her hands were clenched very tightly, her voice was not up to snuff, but she tasted the smell of iron carefully.He couldn't even utter a word to argue, his mind was dazed, but his blood seemed to be boiling, with a deep and unbearable sense of powerlessness.

"Mom knows that she has done something wrong, but she has always wanted to treat you well. My mother has also confiscated your rent for this house, letting you live here and let you write. I bought your breakfast and lunch. Yes, dinner too," Xu Mei choked up, crying sharply, "If you leave, what will you ask me and your uncle to do? Are we going to die? Your uncle is sick and I have no job, so I have to take care of him. Him, we starve to death, then you are murder! Do you know that!"

She picked up the newspaper on the floor, and the sound of tearing exploded in the messy room, saying: "I tell you to go! I tell you to go!" Lian Yan couldn't bear it anymore, raised her hand and angrily pushed Xu Mei away .Xu Mei didn't expect him to resist, she staggered, stepped on the newspaper, fell down, and knocked her head on the edge of the table.

With a muffled sound, Lian Yan stopped breathing, and almost felt that Xu Mei had died, fear and feeble joy piled up together.But Xu Mei had nothing to do, she just knocked on the edge of Yuanrun's table, her eyes widened in horror, she raised her hand to accuse him hoarsely: "You're going to kill someone! You're going to kill mom!"

"Who are you, you even beat your own mother!" Xu Mei got up, sat on the ground and cried again, "How could I have such a son..."

Lian Yan suddenly didn't want to resist anymore, he was trembling all over, listening to the woman crying, his ears were so noisy that he was about to lose his hearing, Lian Yan wanted to find paper, but couldn't find it anywhere, took out the note in his pocket, Lian Yan took the pen, Writing on it overshadows the numbers.The font was ugly, trembling, ugly and dirty, he threw it in front of Xu Mei.

Written on the paper: I'm not leaving.

The ink from the bad pen had seeped out and the numbers were blurred.

The author says:

First of all, let me say sorry, I haven’t updated for several days, I’m really busy recently, if I can write, I will definitely write, but I have the habit of overturning the manuscript (on this article, so I push and push, and I may finally write It will take some time to finish a chapter. I have to prepare for CET-[-] and CET-[-] on Saturday, and it’s almost the final week, so the homework of each subject is also very tight, and I have to start reviewing in advance. TT I’m really sorry, busy can’t be an excuse for me not to update After all, I'm not the only one who is busy, so I'm sorry. There was also a small climax of abuse, and there was basically no abuse after that. In fact, it doesn't take a long time for their reunion. They are just under too much pressure. No matter what, they are Love each other the most.

[Uh, let’s write it in the front, the last chapter of this article is abused, and there will be no abuse after that, just stick to it_(:з」∠)_]