Yukimura, you let go [Net King + Neighbors]

1987. 4, 20

I went back to that cage with my child who was born without IQ or physical defects.

1987. 3, 25

My brother let me go out, saying that we want to give the child a normal home.

I laughed until tears welled up in the corners of my eyes.

The parents are brother and sister, and the mother was raped and pregnant by the father. The mother did not want to give birth to him, but was forced to compromise by his father in captivity.

How could he be a normal kid?

1987. 3, 30

Maybe a woman will accept her fate after having a child, I think that's probably the way I will be in my life.But for Ashi, I want to live well.

Because I am his mother.

……

1987. 6, 30

I met Dr. Natsume, the gynecologist who gave me a C-section.He asked me to sit in a nearby coffee shop. I hesitated for a while and refused to agree. He smiled, and the smile on his face was warmer than the sun: "This beautiful lady is not willing?"

How can I reject such a person who is the only one who gives me light in the dark?

1987. 7, 01

My relationship with Dr. Natsume has become closer. I don't know why I always run into him so often when I go out every day. I think I've fallen for him.

1987. 7, 02

Zhengsheng said that he would take me to escape, to a place far, far away.On the same night, my brother said that he would take me home for a few days and tell my mother about us.

My brother is already crazy, but I am not. I know we cannot get married.

I don't know what my brother told my mother, so that my mother hasn't come to see us this year.

1987. 7, 05

Zhengsheng made a perfect plan, saying that he would take me away in two days!

1987. 7, 07

The plan worked!I am so happy!I can finally live a normal life!

……

The diary came to an abrupt end here, and the following plot was presented just by my imagination. It was nothing more than that my father got angry, went to arrest his mother, and then... used illegal but legal means to get rid of Natsume Masakatsu.

Otherwise, how could Dad not go to jail.

"Chaozi...you had you just the day before Youxiang left me..." Dad clutched his chest, with an unprecedented heartbroken expression on his face: "I didn't know that Youxiang had you at that time... So I've been...I'm sorry Asako...it's all my father's fault..."

...Then how did father and mother register their marriage?They are brothers and sisters!How did they legally let my elder brother and I have household registration and then go to school?

impossible!There is no reason!Dad must be lying to me!

It is impossible for him to marry his mother!

"to be continued"

Paragraph71 My hallucinations

——>> "In a strange place, I was alone, I was panicked, but I couldn't get out, so I had to slam my fist on the door panel, hoping that someone outside the door could hear my voice."

No matter how I try to imagine that situation, it’s unreasonable. I can’t figure it out at all, and I can’t figure out what method my father used to register the marriage with my mother. There is a voice in my head screaming to me that it’s fake. Yes, everything my father told me is false, my mother's notebook is also false, all of this is false.

There are so many negative things, I even began to doubt whether my existence was fabricated because of someone's intense meditation.

I touched my face and pinched my thigh, but there was no pain.

I ran around the house in a panic, trying to find a mirror and confirm that my existence was real, but after I ran into the bathroom and stood in front of the mirror mounted on the wall, I didn’t find it. own figure.

The mirror was very clean, without a single bit of fuzziness, and there was no mist clouding the mirror surface, but there was no me in the middle of the term.

... Am I... really alive?

I touched my neck and my hair, but there was nothing in the mirror.

I raised my hands and waved my fists at the mirror, but there was nothing in the mirror.

...just kidding...

Am I really alive?Or... am I really human?Am I really human?

Now I even start to doubt myself.

If I'm alive, if I'm not a ghost, why isn't I in the mirror?Why not me!Where have I been?Where have I been!

I stretched out my hand irresistibly to touch the mirror, my arm was trembling, but when my fingertips were about to touch the mirror, I saw my hand go through.

That's right, after wearing it, my fingers and the whole arm became transparent.

I... I'm not human!I stand in front of the mirror but the mirror can't reflect my face!My whole arm went through trying to touch something solid!

I'm not human?Then what am I?Is it a ghost?

I screamed, screamed loudly, the sharp voice passed through my throat unstoppably, a crack appeared in the mirror in front of me at a speed visible to the naked eye, and then the crack gradually became larger, and then to Spread out in all directions, like a spider forming a web on the mirror.

"Asako!"

"Sister Chaozi!"

"Natsume-san!"

"Natsume!"

My sharp scream made people outside the door rush towards the bathroom shouting my name. I shuddered and rushed out before they ran to me. I didn't know what I was doing now. In what form does it exist? Just now I was standing in front of my father talking to him, and I was standing next to Yukimura Seiichi asking him if it hurts. To be honest, I really don’t know if I am a human or just a soul now .

I can talk to them, but I can't find myself in the mirror.

Is it because I can't see myself?Or can't they see it?

"What's wrong with you, Chaozi!"

Seeing that my face was pale and bloodless, my father rushed over and grabbed my shoulder and shook it vigorously. I seemed to lose my soul and had no reaction at all until I was dizzy and dizzy when I was shaken by my father, and my eyes began to flash. Venus came back to God.

"Dad...I...I..." I raised my head to look at him with tears in my voice: "I... Am I dead?"

"What nonsense are you talking about!" His expression turned serious: "How can you die if you stand in front of me now!"

"But...but..." I sobbed for a while, and then tears gushed out of my eyes like a fountain, and I couldn't control it at all: "I can't see myself in the mirror!"

- I can't see myself in the mirror.

- I can't see myself in the mirror.

Why can't I see it?Is it because I'm not of this world or is the mirror broken?Isn't the only function of a mirror is to reflect the appearance of a person, so how can it be broken?

...I don't even know if I'm alive now...

Am I really alive?

……

"What's the matter with you, Natsume-san?"

"Natsume-san, are you important?"

"Do you want to go to the hospital to have a look?"

I was sweating non-stop, the sweat was so much that it soaked the clothes I was wearing, and I could almost wring out water when I took them off. My father, brother, Mitty, Haru and Sasawara-san surrounded my bed like this Looking at me, I was lying on the bed and my mind was in a daze.

Wait, how did I come to bed?

...how long have I been in bed?Did it just climb up?Why do I have no memory at all?

My recent memory seems to only stay in the past, the time when my parents were at home when I was a child, and my brother was very kind to me. I can’t remember what I did or what I ate recently.

Doesn't it mean that people don't start to recall the past until they are very old?So now I...does it mean that life is coming to an end?

I raised my eyelids, and it weighed as much as a thousand catties.

……

Dimly, I seemed to see my mother standing not far from me and waving to me. She was wearing a beautiful white dress, standing under the sun, as beautiful as an angel.

Her voice seemed to be coming from far, far away in the sky: "Chaozi, come here quickly! Come to mother's side!"

I raised my right hand high, waved it vigorously, and called her: "Mom!"

When I was about to run towards my mother, my arm was grabbed by Seiichi Yukimura who suddenly appeared from behind. He stood under the tree and looked at me with a gloomy expression.

The sunlight casts mottled light and shadows through the densely packed leaves. Yukimura Seichi cast a large shadow on his face because of the backlight. He said, "Don't go there."

Just three short words extinguished the flame in my heart that had just been ignited and was going up and ready to burn more and more. I subconsciously shook the hand that was caught by him, but Yukimura Jingshi didn't use much strength, and I broke free easily.

"Don't go over," my brother said again, but his body didn't move further to grab me or drag me back: "Don't go over."

I wonder why Yukimura Seichi repeats these three words three times. The one standing over there is my mother, and it's not someone else. Why can't I go there?Could it be... does my brother still hate my mother's 'cheating'?

But it's not right... Mom didn't cheat, mom didn't do anything wrong!The wrong person is Dad!It was my father who had that almost deformed obsession with my mother, that's why we had my brother and me with my mother.

The truth came out, mom didn't