What is it like to find someone for your ex?

Halfway through the first semester of freshman year, Guan Qing was isolated by the people around her.

College students say they are half social beings, but after all, half of them retain the habits of children.People who don't fit in, people who study too hard... are easy to be isolated.

The alienation was unassuming.I usually smile and say hello to you, but the four-person dormitory only has a WeChat group for three people, and I don’t tell you about new regulations in the dormitory, and I don’t call you when I order takeout.

But these are just small things.

Guan Qing grew up in a single-parent family, and his mother had always been weak and sick. He had to crawl through junior high and high school. When he arrived at university, he had to fight for scholarships to fill vacancies, and he also had to work as much as possible after school.

"Guan Qing, are you working again?"

Guan Qing put a Level [-] vocabulary book into her bag and nodded.

His three roommates gathered together, looked at him with a smile and muttered to himself, and one of them asked, "Is it that poor to work every day?"

"Fortunately."

Guan Qing was taken aback, and said.

They whispered in a 'self-consciously small' voice: "I've never seen him study by himself, and he still got such a high score in the exam. I'm afraid the money from his part-time job was used to cheat... Tsk tsk tsk."

"With such a face, he is considered pretty in beta. Someone is willing to help him without spending money."

"Who knows what the job he does at night, hehe."

Guan Qing's hand holding the book was so tight that it turned white, and he lowered his head and bit his lip, as if he couldn't feel the pain.

He also wanted to refute.But at that time, Guan Qing was really inferior and small. He did work at the bar at night, and although he didn't do anything nasty, he still took tips.

What's more, the uncle of one of his roommates is the dean of the department.This director is in charge of the life and death power of the scholarship. A scholarship can cover his living expenses for a whole year, so he can't afford to lose.

At that time, Guan Qing lived in a timid and aggrieved manner.Every day I swallow my anger in front of my roommates, and even force a smile on the phone with my mother, pretending that everything is fine.

Family circumstances forced him to grow up prematurely, but no one taught him how to stretch the branches properly.Only the darkness of society fell on his shoulders prematurely, making him shrink back aggrievedly, and while detesting such a self, he fell into an endless loop of constant tolerance and retreat.

He has no capital to resist.

Guan Qing often thinks that in fact, many years later, he is still cowardly and timid.So standing in front of that kind of thank you, you will feel ashamed.

But at that time, he was a little more embarrassed than now. Almost anyone could push him and step on him. Everyone looked down on him, and no one liked him.

He thinks he is not worthy of being loved, but he longs to be loved so much.

In his life, almost everything is a luxury.Mother's imported medicines, school fees, winter clothes... But love is the greatest luxury, and even thinking about it makes him feel envious and sad.

Among all the people who hated him, his roommates were unique.

"Since you are so difficult, the squad leader will not add you to this weekend's outing-I am for your own good."

It was just a small outing. He was going to work, and he had no interest.Just thinking about it, I heard another roommate say:

"Hey, to be honest, you really should come. There are many beauties here, and there are three or four omega."

The man's tone was smug, as if after going on that outing, the person in his fantasy would belong to him.

Another roommate laughed and scolded him: "Even if there is an omega, it's not for you. Anyone with a discerning eye knows that it's for thank you."

"What did you say?" Guan Qing raised his head suddenly, stared at the man, and asked.

The man was taken aback by him, and said in a bad mood: "It's just Xie Xu, the one next door is a new school grass, and he likes to raise his own status, and doesn't participate in any activities, just this time I don't know what's going on. He said he would be with us, so he agreed...

"As far as I'm concerned, he's just average, just a little taller. The main reason is that his family has money, these women."

Guan Qing didn't listen to the man's complaints afterwards, and the word "Thank you" echoed in his brain, with some inexplicable emotions.

He remembered this man.

Since he entered school, he obviously didn't remember anyone.Including these roommates, they just marked the signs of 'Idiot No. [-]', 'Mentally Retarded No. [-]' and 'Idiot No. [-]' in their minds.

But he remembered that when he was in school, he took the black train cheaply just after he got off the train, and was extorted from all his money.The people in the small town where he used to live were simple, or cowardly, and although they were looked down upon a lot because of their poverty, no one was involved in cheating money.He called the police, but that didn't do much for granted.

That was the first truth the big city taught him.

He was at the freshman registration point under the M archway, looking at the busy traffic on the street, and remembered that he worked twelve hours a day throughout the summer vacation, his mother stayed up late to do odd jobs, and even hid the money he saved from stopping medicine without telling him.

Not only did he want to cry, he had the urge to rush under the wheel of the wheel in the middle of the road.

He numbly dragged his suitcase to the check-in point and was told the various fees to be paid.He looked at the nationally ranked university that he had dreamed of for a long time, sniffed, and said to the man:

"Sorry, I want to go through the withdrawal procedures."

At that time, student loans were immature, and various subsidies were not in place.For a poor man like him, the reality is that he and his mother have no means or energy to save so much money.

The man froze for a moment, and said, "Uh, if you haven't enrolled yet, you don't need to do anything special, as long as you don't report for ten days, you will automatically be regarded as giving up your student status. But classmate, do you have any difficulties?"

Guan Qing shook her head: "No, I just don't want to read it."

"I don't want to read anymore, why?" A clear and slightly deep voice came from the side. The voice was very ear-catching. Just listening to it, people can see the shadows of the leaves shaking in the sun.

Guan Qing turned his head and saw the most important person in his life besides his mother.

But at the time he felt nothing.

Because he no longer belonged to himself, he looked at everything in the university with malice and prickles all over his body, like a hedgehog.He even thought, this person is very rich at first glance, is he here to show off?

He moved sideways involuntarily.

He considers himself a rat in the gutter, and he doesn't fit in with this kind of person who is born to be the pride of heaven, and he will get burned if he looks at it more than once.

Later facts proved that he was right at the moment, but at that time he was already struggling and couldn't get out.

"No reason, I'm happy." He said lightly, wanting to get away.

"Don't go," the man hurriedly said, "My name is Xie Xu, seeing that you look good, let's make friends."

"..." Guan Qing said, "Sorry, I'm not free."

"Are you angry with your family? The suitcases have been dragged, and you said you don't want to study. Is it because your family doesn't want you to study this, so they don't give you tuition."

Thank you for your perseverance.

Guan Qing stopped walking, a little annoyed, turned around and said, "Why are you meddling?"

Xie Xu took out a bank card, entered the password, and said to the teacher: "Teacher, his tuition fee and book fee are only so much, right?" The teacher nodded.

He smiled foolishly at Guan Qing again: "I will be your parent from now on, call me daddy?"

Guan Qing was startled, opened his mouth, and all kinds of emotions rushed into his heart.He stepped forward a few steps and said to the teacher: "Teacher, don't accept it... what, you already accepted it?"

He glared at Xie Xu with red eyes: "You have nothing to do in your spare time. Why, what about helping the poor? Who wants your sympathy, you—"

With a stalk in his mouth, Xie Xu shrugged and returned what Guan Qing just said: "There is no reason, I am happy."

Guan Qing was angry when he saw him like this. He didn't want to communicate with Xie Xu, so he turned to the teacher and asked, "Teacher, can this money be refunded? I'm not short of money, I really don't miss it..."

Xie Xu quickly put his shoulders on him, dragged him to the side, and said, "I really don't need you to pay it back."

He took out a crumpled piece of paper from his pocket: "Here, look, I checked the lottery tickets I bought earlier, and I found out that I won a lot of them. Your tuition fee is only a fraction of the bonus."

Guan Qing didn't believe it, Xie Xu said with a frowning face again: "You should do me a favor. My family believes in Lao Tzu's way, luck and misfortune depend on it, just won the big prize and don't spend it, and you will be in a car accident when you go out."

"..."

Guan Qing hesitated this time, and said, "Whether you won the lottery or not, I have to pay back the money. What is your department, name?"

"Thank you, Department of Mechanics." Xie Xu's frowning expression disappeared, and he smiled like a rogue, "I will help you cheat on me in the future, I am very bad at math."

"My father died a long time ago." Guan Qing said expressionlessly.

In just a few hours, Guan Qing experienced ups and downs in life.He was calm on the face, but his heart was already full of turmoil, and he even wanted to cry.

Who told him that he was tough on the outside, but cowardly and timid on the inside.

"Sorry." Xie Xu smiled.

He saw that the corners of Guan Qing's mouth were tense, obviously holding back tears, and his heart softened.He reached out and stroked Guan Qing's soft hair, and said:

"It's okay, this city is not good, but it's not as bad as you think. There are bad people, but there must be more good people than bad people."

"Like your dad...uh, like me."

"You just looked at the expression on the traffic outside, which really shocked me. You haven't encountered many good things, so you're so willing to leave?"

It was afternoon at that time, and there were people coming and going in the reporting office. They stood under the shade of the tree, and the light passed through the gaps in the leaves and fell into Xie Xu's light-colored eyes, which were so beautiful and gentle that it was ridiculous.

Guan Qing's nose was extremely sore.

Xie Xu was also a little embarrassed, scratched his head, and said, "Anyway, hold on, I'm still waiting for you to help me cheat."

Guan Qing: "...OK."

Xie Xu smiled at him again, handed him an account, said that if he needed anything, he would add this account as a friend, and left.

After entering school, Guan Qing tried to find Xie Xu many times, but found that Xie Xu was really a busy person.He thought, first he worked to save the money and paid it back. Not long after, the police station called him instead—the black car driver who cheated him of money was arrested and the money was refunded.

The policeman also lamented that if it hadn't been mentioned by a big person, how could such a small case of black car defrauding money be solved.

Guan Qing thought of Xie Xu again.

Thinking of the gentlest smile he had ever seen in his life amidst the chirping of cicadas.

Guan Qing said to his roommate in a low voice, "Can you add me to your outing?"

The three of them were taken aback, and soon giggled again, saying, "What? Is Guan Xueba free again?"

Guan Qing buried his head very low and nodded.

One of them rubbed his thumb and index finger at him: "Suddenly it's not easy to play with someone that everyone doesn't know very well. Show it?"

Guan Qing really didn't want to look up and see such an ugly and dark smile.He had such a smile in his mind, how could he be soiled by such filth.

But he suddenly remembered that he was not clean either.

This group of people is sludge.

Guan Qing, at best, is just a small bunch of weeds that are gradually crumbling under the weight of mud.

It's just that he, the weed, has seen the sun.

"Can you add me to your outing?"

"What? Guan Xueba is free again?"

"Suddenly it's not easy to play with someone that everyone doesn't know very well. Do you mean?"

The pages of the book in Guan Qing's hands were deformed, and he lowered his head and said, "Sorry, I don't have any money."

A few days ago, my mother had a fever and caused pneumonia. There was money to be taken care of there, hospitalization and medical treatment. His mother was sick, and he couldn’t go back. He was already unfilial enough, so how could he use this money for himself? private.The part-time job has reached its limit. If he takes another job, not only his studies, but also his body will almost be unable to bear it.

"No Money."

The three seemed disappointed, and they murmured together for a while, and one of them came out:

"Aren't you writing that paper, the one that is likely to win the prize?"

With a cold face, Guan Qing hesitated for a moment, then nodded.

He immediately understood the meaning of their words - the prize money for a thesis award was much more than what was in Guan Qing's wallet.Moreover, awarding a thesis is not only about money, but also a huge bargaining chip for the school and application for scholarships, and even a highlight for graduate studies and recommendation for going abroad.

Guan Qing didn't want to at all, but this seemed to be the only way.

He struggled for a while, and finally compromised, saying: "It's fine to add your names, but the main creator wants to write about me."

He is the main creator, and anyone with a discerning eye can see that the people behind are here to grab the bonus. …

For this thesis, he came back from work at [-] o'clock in the evening, stayed up all night to search for information and data until [-] o'clock in the morning, and got up at [-] o'clock the next day to go to class.

That man was obviously not a fool either, he looked at Guan Qing as if he was weird: "I mean, add mine and remove your name."

"Don't even think about it." Guan Qing suddenly felt that it was ridiculous, and he almost laughed angrily.

The man rolled his eyes: "I remember you were not interested at first... Later, oh, by the way, as soon as we mentioned Xie Xu, you said you wanted to go."

The three of them looked at each other and laughed together: "Don't you like Xie Xu? Tsk tsk tsk, if you want to eat swan meat, you don't even look at yourself. You can't even compare to the toe."

Guan Qing trembled all over.

"Don't you think so? You are a beta, poor, not beautiful, and have such a withdrawn personality. I'm afraid Xie Xu will feel disgusted if he sees you."

Guan Qing's face was pale, and his voice trembled: "Shut up."

"What did you say?" The man was unbelievable, Guan Qing dared to talk back - relying on his family connections, he had been domineering in the dormitory for a long time, even poured the footwashing water on Guan Qing's bed, Guan Qing didn't even dare to fart let it go.

He said, "Did I say something wrong? You are disgusting and cheap, and even if you thank me, no one will want you."

Guan Qing's face was full of gloom: "Stop relying on others."

"I'm a dog?" The man had a jealous face, and pushed Guan Qing back fiercely, "I think that Xie Xu is a dog, the male||dog who is in love, cheap and stupid , day by day—”

With a bang in his brain, Guan Qing completely exploded.

He raised his fist and slammed it down on the man's face.

The man was frightened and furious, and the other two immediately surrounded and tugged Guan Qingda.Guan Qing seemed to be crazy, and only grabbed that one person and beat him until his nose bleeds, and he even passed out.

Suddenly the bedroom door was pushed open.

The head of the department smiled: "Principal, look, my nephew lives here, and their dormitory has a special atmosphere..."

After seeing the indoor scene clearly, his words got stuck in his throat.

Guan Qing's body was covered with bruises and bruises. The two people around him were kicking him, but now they shrink back in fright.And the nephew of the head of the department was being pulled by the collar by Guan Qing, punching and punching.

The principal was startled and angry, pointing at Guan Qing, unable to say a word.

----

"Guan Qing, you often miss classes, and you work outside the school in violation of school regulations, and you work more than eight hours a week.

"This time you took the lead in provoking trouble and hurting your classmates...

"Oh, I don't want to either." The head of the department showed no regrets on his face, "Go back and pack up the things in the dormitory, and leave as soon as possible."

Guan Qing sat on the chair with his back straight and did not speak.

"It's almost there, let's go." The head of the department waved his hand.

Guan Qing's hands under the table were tightly clenched into fists.

The head of the department looked back strangely: "What's wrong? Let's go."

Guan Qing heard the words squeezed out between his teeth: "Can, can...

"I have a paper, which I anonymously sent to a foreign professor for reading, and he appreciated it very much. My paper will definitely get No.1 in the competition.

"Sign...your nephew's name.

"Don't expel him, just...stay in school for probation, please."

Guan Qing stood up and bowed deeply to the head of the department.

The head of the department smiled when he heard this:

"What are you kidding? Do you really think you are so valuable?"

He stretched out his hand and counted: "A paper, plus this number. I will keep you in school for probation."

When he walked out of the office, there were clouds and thunder, and the moment he stepped out of the eaves, a heavy rain fell.

Guan Qing shook his hands, the page he was searching for was 'M City High||Profit||Loan' on his phone.When going down the stairs, he didn't pay attention and stepped on the ground.

He fell in the rain, in the mud.Everyone around went into the house to hide from the rain, but he himself, amidst the noise of the rain, finally, without any scruples—

cried.

He obviously has only one, but he has been destroyed by the rain of this world to the point of dying.He was born as a weed, only fit to be in the wind and rain, watching others standing in the greenhouse, behind the glass windows, looking at him with half curiosity and half disgust.

And he didn't even dare to be jealous.

The silt pressed on top of his head gradually seeped down, and he himself became dirty.

An umbrella covered his head, Guan Qing raised his head, saw Xie Xu frowning, and stretched out his hand to lift him up.

"What's wrong? You didn't bring an umbrella and fell down while walking?"

The umbrella was not big, and Xie Xu didn't mind Guan Qing's dirty body at all, so he held his shoulders to keep him from the rain.

The rain is too heavy, and having an umbrella is almost the same as not having one.Xie Xu quickly led Guan Qing to a roof, saw that Guan Qing was shaking, thought he was cold, took off his coat and put it on him.

Guan Qing buried his head very low.He just cried so much that he still hasn't stopped. If he looked up, Xie Xu would definitely be able to see his red and swollen eyes.

"Wait, I don't know how long it will rain. If it doesn't stop in 5 minutes, we will rush out." It was already the end of November, and Xie Xu sneezed while wearing this T-shirt.

"You wear it, I'm not cold." Guan Qing's voice was very low and light.

He is really not cold.

The moment I saw Xie Xu, my whole body began to warm up, from the ice and snow to the rainy and humid world, but there is still the sun.Moreover, Xie Xu still remembered him.

Xie Xu shook his head, looked at him hesitantly, and suddenly asked: "Your outing last week...why didn't you come?"

He asked Guan Qing about their squad leader, and the squad leader said that he would invite Guan Qing to come—Guan Qing always worked part-time, and as the squad leader, he wanted to bring him into the group.

But when asked again later, their squad leader hesitated and couldn't tell.

If he hadn't gone to find out by himself...

Guan Qing remembered that two weeks had passed since the fight.The school doesn't want to show off, and everything is handled in a low-key manner.Xie Xu is not in the same line as him, so it's normal not to know.

"I work part-time." Guan Qing said sullenly.

He was a little nervous, and his palms were a little sweaty.

But at that moment, the burden on his heart was lightened. Looking at Xie Xu, he suddenly became enlightened.

If you don't read it, don't read it. At worst, you will go home and work while repeating the exams. High | interest | loans are absolutely unacceptable.He couldn't imagine what he would be like with that stuff on him.

Guan Qing raised her head and smiled at Xie Xu: "I'll go next time, this time I really didn't adjust the working hours.

"By the way, thank you for what happened last time." He was talking about the tuition fee, and after getting the money back, he immediately returned it to Xie Xu.But if there was no advance payment from Xie Xu at that time, he would have lost his student status long ago.

Although he can hardly read now.

But he still thinks he is very lucky, at least he met Xie Xu.

Xie Xu was stunned.

He looked at Guan Qing deeply, without saying a word.

Guan Qing's expression, how should I put it.It feels very fragile and breaks at the touch, but it also has a kind of contradictory tenacity and stubbornness, like a small sunflower firmly rooted in a storm, you always feel that the next gust of wind can blow it down, but it But every time after bowing his head, he slowly straightened up again, facing the sun.

...it looks beautiful.

Guan Qing pursed her lips: "It's raining, let's go."

Walking to the fork, the dormitories of the two are in different directions.Xie Xu touched Guan Qing's wet head and said, "Next time I come out to play, go to the beach, come."

Guan Qing said yes.Although he knew there would be no next time.

Xie Xu hesitated to speak.Guan Qing looked up at him and asked, "Huh? What's the matter?"

Xie Xu motioned for him to come over, and whispered in his ear: "You guys obviously haven't reached the hard target for dropping out, and your department head dare not force you."

Guan Qing slowly opened his eyes wide.

"He's the kind of person who must have made up his mind to take advantage of you. Don't be fooled. I just went over there to check the video of your dormitory - before you beat him, your roommate even pushed you It’s not like you’re making a fuss.”

Xie Xu blinked and said, "Also, even if he makes things difficult for you, don't be afraid. My family donated many buildings to this school.

"I asked a familiar teacher to help you change the dormitory. You go to get out of class and eat with me these few days. They dare not do anything to you."

Guan Qing nodded blankly.

Xie Xu stuffed the umbrella into his hand, took two steps back, stood in the rain and said to him: "My dormitory is very close, you take the umbrella."

Guan Qing quickly said: "No need!" Then asked in a low voice, "Why did you treat me..." so nice.

Xie Xu turned around and took two steps, without looking back, he waved his hand.

Xie Xu remembered the first time they met, the teenager looked at the traffic with a numb expression, which shocked him.But after teasing him a few words, he was like a puppet gradually coming to life, with a distinct and vibrant feeling.He doesn't want to see Guan Qing who is like a puppet anymore, obviously he can be so good-looking.

Why are you nice?

because you are poor...

And cute.

The author has something to say: Little Theater

Xie Xu: Take the opportunity to let him stay with me every day, hehehe

Guan Qing: Xie Xu was so handsome when he was 18...

Preview, the next chapter... um...

See for yourself_(:з」∠)_

You will read it right?