like electricity

Why did you become friends with Zhuo Shuang?

Jiang Shou was silent for a long time, until Jiang Suqing became a little impatient, then said softly, "Because he is very kind to me."

When Jiang Suqing heard such a reason, her whole face was distorted, "Did he give you ecstasy soup? Did I treat you..."

Jiang Shou shook his head, he had expected Jiang Suqing's reaction in this way.

"It's different from the grace of nurturing. I don't know how to say it. Anyway, it's different."

His food and clothing are all earned by Jiang Suqing's hard work. It may seem supercilious to say so, but Zhuo Shuang filled those vacancies that he never got from Jiang Suqing.

"You talk about how good it is, so good that you even forget what I've been telling you, and dare to lie to me."

Jiang Miao, whose hand was still being held, frowned, "Mom, let go first, it hurts. I won't run away."

Jiang Suqing let go. He lowered his head and touched the scratched place on his wrist, hoping that it would not be bruised tomorrow. "I have never met such a nice person in school."

"Never?" Jiang Suqing's first reaction was to suspect that he was lying, "How is it possible? Did you have no friends in school before?"

Even Jiang Shou himself didn't believe it was true, "You can't imagine how bad those people I met before were."

"How bad? Don't always find other people's problems, can you reflect on whether you have done something wrong yourself."

"One may be my problem. Is it like this for a group of people?"

In elementary school, there were 60 students in the ordinary class. He sat in the back row of the classroom and couldn't even hear the teacher's lectures clearly. His grandparents thought this was not good, so they spent their retirement savings to send him to the best small class. Who knows that the new class teacher is a snobbish At present, the front foot repeatedly hints that some students are ignorant and disrespect the teacher, and the back foot dislikes the special products sent by grandparents who save money and don’t eat dogs. They ridicule him in class every now and then, saying that he is a mother. No wonder he is so ill-bred for a child raised by his mother. Others followed suit and gave him several ugly nicknames. Even the boys in the next class would know that there was a shameless "dead face" in their class.He thought it would be better after he entered junior high school, but his grandparents couldn't afford the school selection fee of tens of thousands, and the junior high school had those familiar faces.In this kind of rubbish school where only half of the students can be admitted to ordinary high schools, most of the students are ashamed of studying well. As the top student who is the top student in every exam, he will naturally receive a lot of strange criticism. The girls may be good. At most, I thought he was weird and contemptuous of others, but that group of gangster boys called him a sissy, took away his textbooks and test papers, locked him in the equipment room, and waited for the concierge to inspect him before they found out. The worst thing is to spread rumors that he had an affair with that female chemistry teacher in her 40s, just because she knew that he wanted to be admitted to the middle school and would give him some extra difficult exercises every day, and then called him into the office to explain to him The mistakes and omissions.

He is so withdrawn that he doesn't believe that part of anyone's personality is innate, and the rest is due to these people, so even if he dies, he wants to be admitted to the attached high school to get out of this quagmire.

Following his narration, Jiang Suqing stopped ridiculing him.

"You... Forget it, I won't interrupt you."

When he finally finished speaking, Jiang Suqing lowered her head, "I'm sorry, I don't know, and it was not easy for me at that time."

Her tone softened a little, "I'm sorry, I don't have time, I don't know what happened to you, I'm not a qualified parent."

Jiang Shou couldn't tell what he was feeling now - this was the first time Jiang Suqing bowed her head to apologize to him in the 16 years since he lived.

"It's nothing, it's all over, and it won't change if I look it up again." He turned his head away not used to it, not looking at the expression on Jiang Suqing's face, "I know it's not easy for you, so I never wanted to tell you .”

When she was in the second grade of elementary school, Jiang Suqing went back to live with her grandparents for a few days.It was the first time that he ate the food made by his mother after school. He was very happy because he didn't understand anything, because his mother came back to him, so when Jiang Suqing left a few days later, he felt abandoned again and cried very miserably.

From small to large,

Everyone is repeatedly emphasizing to him that your mother is not easy, and you can't be knocked down by these little things.It is true that the things he encountered were all trivial things, but even if they were small things, they could add up to become a heavy weight of lead, weighing him down.

He thought that he could get rid of these things by being admitted to the attached middle school, and then it was the incident in the first semester of high school that completely crushed him.He began to wonder why he was working so hard, he spent so much energy to achieve his goal, but that scumbag Zhou Zezheng easily stood on the same starting line as him.

It wasn't until Zhuo Shuang suddenly appeared in his life that he realized that everything he had done before was meaningful.

"I made friends around him, and other people gradually dared to approach me and talk to me. No one had ever treated me like this before. It was the first time that someone other than the teacher told me that I was fine and I deserved to be treated well by others. .”

During the six months by Zhuo Shuang's side, he could see the changes in himself. The sharp edges and corners in his character were gradually smoothed and softened. He was no longer wary of everyone and was willing to open his heart to others. heart.

If it was the lifeless him before, Di Xuan would definitely not ask him for help.

"He's not like me at all."

Zhuo Shuang was a light source, even if she stood there doing nothing, she would become the center of the crowd.He tried to isolate this person from his own world, but even so, this person's light would penetrate his darkness and haze and illuminate his closed heart.

Even without the farce in Lao Cao's class, he would still succumb to this man's light, because no one could refuse Zhuo Shuang's kindness, including him.

"I don't want to lose him... Even if his name is Zhuo Shuang, Mom, I don't know if you can understand this feeling."

That Zhuo Shuang brought her half a lifetime of shame, and this Zhuo Shuang brought him the tenderness, love, respect and understanding he dreamed of, who was dying of thirst.

He tugged his sleeves and wiped his eyes carelessly, "I'm sorry, I lied to you, I'm scared...I don't know what to do."

Jiang Suqing was startled by his reaction, she stared blankly at him, and handed back the unused tissue in her hand.

"Did you think so?"

He noticed that he could already look at Jiang Suqing's eyes.

"sorry."

"Don't apologize." Jiang Suqing touched his cheek, he was so surprised that he forgot to blink, "I was also at fault for this matter. If I didn't lose control when I mentioned that person, you don't need to lie to me at all. "

There were small calluses on Jiang Suqing's fingers, which were completely different from Zhuo Shuang's, but he still couldn't help closing his eyes.

"I'm sorry." Jiang Suqing repeated her apology again, "I'm not a good mother."

"he……"

Jiang Suqing jumped ahead of him and said, "I know, it's just the same name and surname. How can there be such a coincidence in the world that your friend happens to be that person's child... how is it possible."

Jiang Shou stood there, as if he was in the clouds - he didn't expect Jiang Suqing to forgive her lie so easily.Does this mean that he can open his mouth to confess to Zhuo Shuang, confess his life experience and family, just like Zhuo Shuang once did to him.

He can escape the torment of guilt and pain if he is willing to speak up.

"There is still class tomorrow, so go back to sleep."

Before the door was closed, Jiang Mou looked back at Jiang Suqing for the last time.

She was still standing where she was before, thinking that he wasn't looking, she squatted down slowly, covered her face, and sobbed almost breathlessly.

·

After such an encounter, Jiangchou's drowsiness has long gone.

He unplugged the phone that was charging, stared at Zhuo Shuang's name in the address book under the desk lamp in a daze.It was 03:30 in the middle of the night, and he suddenly wanted to hear Zhuo Shuang's voice, and wanted to hear him call him a little classmate.

"You can call me anytime you want."

He never doubted that Zhuo Shuang would lie to him, even in such a late night

So he forced himself to put the phone down, turn off the light and lie down, pulling the blanket over his head by the way.

Today is Monday, the beginning of a new week, no matter how many people hate Monday, but for him, only at school can he be with that person without any burden, so he likes all the days when he needs to be at school.

Four hours, at most four hours, he will be able to see Zhuo Shuang, all the waiting and anticipation before that is valuable, he doesn't need to rush this moment.

However, ten minutes later, unable to sleep, he opened his eyes again.

Before dawn, he got out of bed and opened the cabinet door.As the weather warmed up, Jiang Suqing picked up all the heavy winter clothes into the big cabinet in the storage room, leaving only light summer and autumn clothes.Because of the regulations of the attached middle school to wear school uniforms throughout the year, he actually doesn't have many clothes, and he can only fill one-third of the space with a full dozen.

Last week, I went back to the old house with Jiang Suqing, and he didn't have much time to tidy up the relics he brought back, so they were all stuffed in the cabinet.He took them out one by one, grandma's accounting book, diary, grandpa's favorite book "Three Kingdoms", a yellowed blue and white flower handkerchief, a pair of tortoiseshell presbyopic glasses with scratched lenses... Every day They all carry the memories of the most carefree days in his life.

At the bottom is an old photo album with yellowed plastic covers.He hesitated to open it, and what came into view was his birth photo.

The newborns are not very good-looking, with thinning hair, red all over, and a small and skinny one, like a monkey, and he is no exception. He is lying on the hospital scale, and there is a line of time and date below.He flipped through it, and most of the front were photos of him when he was a child, such as this one, which he vaguely remembered was taken the year before elementary school.That year, Jiang Suqing asked a colleague to borrow a digital camera, and took him and his grandparents to the city square to take pictures. In the photo, he hugged his grandmother's legs awkwardly, while Jiang Suqing supported his shoulders.

Turning back, the color photos gradually decreased, replaced by some old black and white photos.He saw the grandparents who had just joined the work wearing lace nylon shirts and Chinese tunic suits that were popular at the time, and took pictures of the wedding photos of that era with a smile on their faces. The camera, looking not very happy.

When turning to a certain page, he stopped suddenly.He reached into the gap to take out the photo, and found that his feeling was correct. There were indeed two photos in this grid, and they were two pasted photos.

Old fashioned photo paper does get sticky when exposed to water.He tried to separate them, but he failed after several attempts, because the two sheets were glued so tightly that it might cause problems if they were torn apart.

If he guessed correctly, the two photos should have been glued together on purpose.