Think childish

The "SARS" in 03 finally carved a heavy scar in the hearts of the people across the country. During this period, many fresh lives quietly ended, leaving endless regret and pain for the living, and it made everyone feel heavy What I admire are those medical staff who are fighting on the front line day and night, saving lives and even sacrificing themselves.

In the next ten years, when we talk about the "SARS era", the first thing people express is still the fear of death and illness.Qiao Zhi later recalled that period of time, and there seemed to be a sour smell lingering on the tip of her nose forever, and a sentence said by a very young female nurse in a certain TV interview would always involuntarily flash through her mind. Words: No life should be treated differently. It is the eternal mission and pursuit of medical staff to save lives and heal the wounded.

……

In mid-June, this vigorous campaign against SARS finally came to an end.Qiao Zhi arrived at the Beijing airport around ten o'clock in the morning, and Guo Qingshan drove over. On the way home, the two of them still felt heavy when they talked about this matter.

"How is Xiaoyan doing now?" Qiao Zhi asked.

Guo Qingshan replied: "There is no major problem with the body. I have survived this test, but the doctor said that it will be observed for a period of time, and I cannot be discharged from the hospital yet."

Xiaoyan is Guo Qingshan’s college classmate and his girlfriend. In March, Xiaoyan was in charge of an art exhibition in Hong Kong with a friend of hers. After the end, the two went to Guangdong and fell ill as soon as they arrived in Beijing. All the people in the same group were infected.Fortunately, I am lucky enough to survive now.

Qiao Zhi said: "Since the condition has been stabilized, the hospital should be able to visit now, right? Let's not go home, let's go and see Xiaoyan."

Guo Qingshan: "OK."

……

When we arrived at the hospital, Guo Qingshan parked the car, grabbed Qiao Zhi who was about to get off the car, and said, "Sister, Xiaoyan has been in a bad mood recently, and she always loses energy. She doesn't like to talk to me when she talks, so you can help me persuade her when the time comes."

Qiao Zhi patted his hands and comforted him: "The patient is like this, don't worry, I'll tell her."

Guo Qingshan didn't let her go, hesitated for a while, and said: "There is one more thing, sister, I...I want to propose to Xiaoyan."

"Marriage proposal!" Qiao Zhi looked at him with wide eyes and laughed, a little surprised. "When? Does Xiaoyan know?"

He shook his head: "I don't know yet, I want to surprise her, what do you think?"

Qiao Zhi said happily, "I think it's very good!" Then he asked, "Did you tell uncle and others about this?"

He continued to shake his head: "Not yet, I'll tell you first."

Qiao Zhi nodded happily: "Okay, you can tell me. Later, you can find a time and we can discuss it in detail to see how to ask for this marriage. If you want to make the proposal ceremony more lively, then we will Just take your parents, sister Hong and the others over."

When she said this, she suddenly remembered something: "It's a pity that grandma passed away the year before last, otherwise, she should be the happiest to see you getting married."

Guo Qingshan looked at her suddenly gloomy eyes, and there was an impulse in his heart. He wanted to tell her something almost immediately, but he was worried...

Forget it, he thought, let's wait and tell her when the time is right.

But when is the right time?

Guo Qingshan didn't know.

In the past few years, he has seen her become more and more taciturn, especially after her grandma left the year before last, for a long time, she always started to be in a daze for no reason, and her life seemed to have nothing else except work new things to do.The most youthful part of her life seemed to have burned out, entering a period of dullness ahead of time.

Speaking of which, he didn't know about the entanglement between her and Qiu Shui. The cause was that on New Year's Eve three years ago, he was delayed by some things and delayed his return home. On New Year's Eve, he called his parents first. He called her, and then called her home, only to learn that she was not at home.

At that time, Sister Hong said on the phone: "I don't know what happened. I was watching TV well, but suddenly I got up, took my bag and ran to the airport. I said that I had to go to Beijing immediately. It's been a day, and she hasn't called back, and she didn't say whether she will come back at night."

After hanging up the phone, he didn't feel at ease no matter what he thought. After thinking about it, he finally decided to go to Yushui Garden.Although she didn't live there when she came to Beijing after Qiu Shui left, but he didn't know why, but he always felt that she would be there.

It was not easy to take a taxi on New Year's Eve, and he took a taxi almost halfway through the journey.He still had a key to the house, and when he entered the house, he found that the light was not on, but the living room smelled strongly of alcohol.

He turned on the light, frowned and looked at the strangely shaped beer cans on the coffee table.

There is no one on the first floor.

He ran up to the second floor in a few steps, and went to the study to look around, but there was no one there.Then there was her old bedroom, and there was no one there.Finally, he walked to Qiushui's bedroom, and immediately found that the door was open and someone was inside.

The lights were also turned off in the bedroom, but he could already smell the strong smell of alcohol.

Guo Qingshan gently opened the door, and caught a glimpse of the black shadow nestled on the sofa on the balcony.

He called her: "Sister?"

Hearing the sound, Qiao Zhi leaned on the armrest and wanted to get up. During this period, he seemed to lose his center of gravity and his upper body fell to one side, knocking something on the small table next to him. He heard the sound of the wine bottle hitting the ground and shattering.He was afraid that the glass shards would hit her, so he turned on the light directly, then ran over a few steps, helped her up and moved her to the side.

Qiao Zhi was drunk, completely drunk.

Guo Qingshan almost never saw her get drunk, he knew that she was surprisingly good at drinking, but that night, he could really feel that she was really drunk.

Otherwise, with her personality, how could she say those things to him?

Qiao Zhi later told him some things intermittently that night, some happened when she was young, and some happened when she was out on business. Of course, the most talked about was about one person.

……

"The first valuable thing I sold in my life was my own feelings. I remember that I was only thirteen or fourteen years old at that time. My dad owed a whole lot of debt to others and was beaten up. I was covered in blood, and they caught me and asked me to pay it back, a total of [-] yuan, plus the mental damage fee for sleeping with other women... That was the first time in my life that I was scared by 'money', because I I don’t have any money, I don’t know what to do... Later... Then I figured out a way, I called my mother, the beautiful Ms. Guo Yuan, and I threatened her to give me [-]..." Qiao Zhi She smirked, "She thought it was a bit expensive, but she gave it to me in the end. You see, this is the first valuable thing I sold."

Guo Qingshan had an impression of what she said, but he never knew the truth of the matter. He was still young at the time, and after that incident, he also asked Qiao Zhi why she was taken away by those bad guys that day. Qiao Zhi He no longer remembers the reason he told him at that time, maybe it was because it was too perfunctory and insignificant, so he just forgot it.

She looked at him drunkenly, and said: "Since then, I have reminded myself not to be too emotionally indulging, and not to rely too much on others, because the feeling of being abandoned is really... sad."

When Qiao Zhi said this, her eyes suddenly became moist, and then she raised her mouth like a child, restrained her crying, let the tears hang down, and looked at him stubbornly: "But I abandoned her, I Let her go."

Seeing his sister being so sad, Guo Qingshan felt as if he had been cut by a knife, he hugged her into his arms, and kept comforting her softly, but it was useless, it was useless at all, his shoulder was soon slashed Wet, she wept silently, stubbornly refusing to make a sound.

"I was almost, almost, about to surrender to her... But I was also afraid of her impulsiveness, her emotions... I was afraid that she was still so young, what if she regretted it in the future?" She suddenly got up from his arms, and whispered, "I saw her today, on TV, she was wearing a white sweater and a red scarf, crowded in the crowd celebrating, with the gate of Heaven behind her. "

Guo Qingshan was stunned for a moment: "Is she in Beijing? Are you looking for her when you come back?"

Qiao Zhi shook her head, and kept shaking her head: "I can't find her, I can't find her..."

She muttered to herself: "She seems to have cut her hair, she is smiling happily...she doesn't want to be found by me."

Guo Qingshan didn't know how to comfort her, so he could only drink with her, one cup after another, and then listen to her talking about the past over and over again.

……

It was already lunch time after leaving the hospital, Qiao Zhi recalled her empty apartment without a pot, and said, "Let's eat outside first before going back."

During the meal, Guo Qingshan was absent-minded and frowned. Qiao Zhi thought he was thinking about a marriage proposal, so she comforted him and said: "Xiaoyan has to rest for a while now, and the marriage proposal must at least wait until she is out of the hospital." , don't be too nervous."

Guo Qingshan made a "hmm" and buried himself in two mouthfuls of rice.

"Sister, I'm married, how about you?" He suddenly asked jokingly.

Qiao Zhi was taken aback.

Regarding the night three years ago, neither of them mentioned it afterward. She even buried everything in her heart cruelly, forcing herself not to think about it, not to recall it.She restrained herself very well. In the past three years, she has hardly thought of that person much.

"Don't worry about me." She smiled, "Grandma asked me to take good care of you before she died, and to solve your life-long affairs first, so that I can breathe a sigh of relief."

Guo Qingshan was silent, and then said: "Sister, I know you want me to be happy, and I also want you to be happy."

Qiao Zhi looked at him strangely and smiled: "What's wrong with you today? Why did you suddenly become sentimental?"

Guo Qingshan didn't say a word, he suddenly picked up the teapot beside him and poured himself a full cup, then picked it up boldly and drank it down in one gulp.

Qiao Zhi put down her chopsticks in a funny way, and watched his performance quietly.

Guo Qingshan didn't say anything, he lowered his head and rummaged through the bag for a long time, finally found a crumpled note and handed it to her.

Qiao Zhi flattened the note and saw that it was a string of numbers.

"What is this?" she asked.

Guo Qingshan swallowed his saliva, and said nervously: "Let's talk about it first, I didn't deliberately hide this from you, the main reason is..." He frowned and thought for a long time, "It can be regarded as environmental influence, anyway, it's not bad for me, after you listened You can't be angry with me, scold me or something..."

Qiao Zhi curled her lips and looked at him indifferently: "Say it."

"This is... Qiushui's phone number." After Guo Qingshan finished speaking, he lowered his head.

"..."

"What did you say?" She frowned in disbelief, and subconsciously clenched the note with her fingers.

Guo Qingshan was heartbroken, and simply confessed everything: "Some time ago, Xiaoyan was transferred out of the isolation ward. I went to the hospital to go through procedures, and then... I ran into her. At that time, I was in a hurry to get things done, thinking that I had made a mistake. I didn’t catch up. But when I went back, I remembered what you said I saw her on TV three years ago. I was afraid that it was her, so I ran back to the hospital to inquire, and found out that she had gone. However, there was a The nurse heard that I was inquiring about her, so she gave me this, saying it was...she confessed."

The author has something to say: I would like to share with you some of my thoughts.

In fact, during the creation process of a book, the connection with the author will gradually decrease, and until the end, this connection will be completely broken.It will eventually become an independent work that is open to the world.

When you read it, the resulting agreement or disapproval is a very subtle connection, and it is your connection with this work.The various emotions involved in this article, including men and women and men and women, you only need to feel what you can feel, because my creation is based on my own cognition, thoughts and experiences, and my feelings are definitely different from yours. The same, of course, if at some point you can get the feeling I have had, I will feel very happy.

It doesn't matter if you want to leave halfway, I always feel honored.

After finishing the serious talk, let’s talk lightly, it should start to be sweet after another chapter...

(no guarantee