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Xie Chonglin's childhood was very boring.

His father did not come home all year round, and his mother scolded and whipped him, day after day, in an endless cycle.

He often wonders, is this really a home?Why is it different from what he saw in the book?What is the point of such a home?

Looking at his flirtatious father and his tearful mother at home all day, he began to loathe feelings and fear marriage.

The first time Xie Chonglin was shown his love was in junior high school. The little girl with a flushed face handed him a love letter. Her delicate voice was full of admiration, and even her eyes were full of tenderness when she looked at him.

He threw up at home that night, those eyes reminded him of his mother, the same way his mother looked at his father, and it made him sick.

Later, he began to only accept bed partners, not emotional entanglements. Once he saw the familiar temperature in the other party's eyes, he would leave quickly.

His family and his mother became the eternal shackles on him, and he could not break free.

Later, when he met Wen Shu, he was only attracted by his appearance at first, who wouldn't like a boy full of youthfulness.

But Wen Shu's eyes were too innocent, so innocent that he couldn't bear to hurt him, so let it be if he thought about it, there was no need to harm a child.But he was really reluctant to let him walk away.

Until the day they were about to go to bed, he still said something that hurt Wen Shu. As expected, when Wen Shu left, he was a little sad and relieved. He and Wen Shu were not on the same side.

Wen Shu found him again later, and he thought he said those bold words without fear, but Wen Shu didn't know that when he spoke, his eyes were full of fear, and his body was even trembling.

Wen Shu was too pure, and Xie Chonglin was ashamed to look at Xie Chonglin with his eyes often. This aroused the violence in his heart and made him want to destroy these clean eyes.

He succeeded, he saw that Wen Shu's eyes gradually no longer ignited the love for him, and the eyes were full of sadness, and finally there was no more sadness.

He didn't dare to see Wen Shu, he started to avoid him, he couldn't figure out what kind of psychology he had, it should have ended long ago as usual, but this time he couldn't bear to say the end.

Later, he was getting married, and he understood that this was an opportunity.

It's time for him to put down his study and go.

In fact, he knew in his heart that even if he didn't take the initiative to mention it, Wen Shu would take the initiative to mention it after a while.

Then let him open the mouth.

He thought that after the separation, he would be relaxed, he would breathe a sigh of relief, and the burden in his heart would disappear.

But it didn't.

He began to become irritable, irritable all day long, unable to suppress it.

He began to think of Wen Shu constantly.

In the middle of the night, when you wake up in the morning, when you eat, and when you drink.

Think about what he is doing now, whether he has eaten, what he is eating, and how he is feeling.

He felt dazed.

It's not that he was dazed now, but he started to be dazed when he saw Wen Shu for the first time.

And then he broke off the engagement, he felt relieved, he didn't want to get married.

In the past, he thought that he would get married sooner or later, but after he tried it, he found that he still couldn't overcome the fear in his heart.

Fear of marriage.

He decided not to marry.

During that time, he saw Wen Shu, but Wen Shu didn't seem to want to see him, and always seemed to reject him.

He was pissed and pissed off, so he did something wrong after another rejection, but he didn't regret it too much because he was a beast.

He finally understood that he loves reading books, and the moment he understood, the emotions that had tortured him for countless days and nights had the answer.

Because he loves reading books.

Love is troublesome, painful, tangled, and tormenting.

But it wasn't as scary as he imagined.

He thought he hated and feared love, but when he found out that he fell in love with someone, he was very happy, from the bottom of his heart.

The author has something to say:

end!Thank you to every reader who sees here!Sorry for the bad writing!mwah!