[Wei Yong] Looking for Lilia

Yuuri stared at the stage dumbfounded, from his perspective, he could only see a side profile of the male protagonist surrounded by the crowd.

Yang's reaction was no lighter than his.

"What's going on?" she murmured. "What the hell—can anyone tell me what happened? Why—why is Victor on stage?"

The only answer to her was Yuuri's breathy "ho-ho-" through his windpipe.

Yuuri stared intently at the stage - even if he only saw a profile, he would not have mistaken the dancer who was playing the main character boy surrounded by villagers - he was definitely Viktor Nikiforov himself.

what happened?Why did Victor play?what happened? Where did JJ go?He heard the shallow part of his consciousness throwing out one question after another, but the deeper and more important part, his entire brain, was unable to do any thinking or information processing, and he could only stare firmly at the stage, expecting Looking forward to the next moment when he saw Victor from the gap in the crowd.

There seemed to be something stuck in his throat.

Victor plays the role of JJ, and there is no doubt that their choreography should be the same. In the first scene, the music of the boy's appearance is the same as the music of the boy who regards the elf as an imaginary enemy. "eros" with flamenco elements.The boy shuttled and danced flexibly among the villagers, like a happy and free bird - Yuuri had seen JJ perform it countless times, but he could almost tell that something was different in Victor's performance: JJ played He is a teenager, a pompous guy who has become arrogant under the pampering and pampering of people, but in Viktor's dance steps, in his every confident movement, Yuuri feels that he is playing as if he is no longer a pampered boy. A broken boy, people no longer looked at him with tolerance and understanding, but admiration—they worshiped him and regarded Victor as a leader. He was no longer a boy, but a man.

This changed the whole performance, although the arrangements on the stage were not any different, but everything has been changed, this is Victor's energy - when he appears on the stage, everything on the stage is driven and controlled by him, he Is the undisputed king and legend of the stage.

Yuuri stared at the lead dancer on stage, breathless for the first time in the performance—not from fear, but from excitement.Tears involuntarily filled his eyes.

It's Victor!This is Victor!A continuous, huge shock and admiration hit his chest and eardrum, and he couldn't control his own physiological reaction: his face was flushed with excitement, and tears couldn't stop flowing.

"Uh-huh, uh-huh - got it," Yang said from the sidelines, her voice seemed to have disappeared seconds ago, and Yuuri couldn't hear anything and could only stare at Viktor's figure on the stage, when everything around him Suddenly it came alive again, noisier and more complicated.

"What happened—what happened?" Yuuri's voice choked so badly that he felt like he had a big lemon stuck in his throat.Yang looked at him helplessly, took out a tissue and handed it to him.

"JJ he—uh—" She had a weird expression on her face, "he has diarrhea."

"..."

"Yes, I know, it's funny." Yang said, judging from her expression, she seemed to feel that there was something else hidden, but she didn't say it, "Are you okay? Are you still okay? What's the matter with these tears ?”

"I'm fine," Yuuri said, swallowing hard. "I'm just... I..." He didn't know how to describe that feeling. He thought that he would never see Victor on stage in his life. He almost forgot why he fell in love with Victor in the first place—because He's a god on stage, he adores Victor, and that fascination and adoration builds up until it becomes a forest fire.And he didn't know how to make it stop.

"I'm so happy." He calmed down and replied, he wanted to sound calm, but his calm had been consumed by the fire the moment he saw Victor appear on stage.

He couldn't control the spasms and tremors of his limbs, as if his soul was experiencing a tsunami.He flashed a smile at Yang, startling her.

"I'm so happy," Yuuri repeats, "I—"

How would he describe that feeling?It was as if an oasis appeared in the desert, and the believer saw his god again.

Yang looked worried.

"Are you all right?"

Yuuri shook his head—the question itself was redundant, his composure had been replaced by a new frenzy.

He's not okay, he's—

His fighting spirit was completely ignited.

In the beginning, Victor had to admit, it was strange and unfamiliar to be back on stage, surrounded by dancers and attract the attention of the audience.

The memory of dancing is as far away as it was in his previous life. He has been deliberately avoiding the existence of dancing, as if after that accident, he created a new world, a world without the existence of dancing.It wasn't until he was back on stage, surrounded by a huge light source, when the noise of his world disappeared and only the music haunted him, that he realized how weird that world was.

A world without dancing!What, what, what an unbearably horrible place it was.

What he gave up was not what he was tired of, only God knows how hard it is for Victor!It's like telling birds not to fly, or trees not to grow—to give up dancing is to let him give up his innate instincts, and for a while, like a withdrawal addict, he feels in his marrow, His own blood vessels were cut out, and he lost a part—a large part of himself.He felt like he had lost his soul.

"It's just self-touching," Yakov commented. "You can't repay what is owed by giving up dancing, and heal what is damaged—you affect no one but yourself."

He has a point.Victor has to admit, but there is only a thin line between being moved and realizing his self-worth - he destroyed a rare treasure, he destroyed his true love, can he just continue to live his life like this? ?It's not that he doesn't miss dancing—would you be willing to give up a part of your body?Unless what you want to save is the soul.

All he knew was that he had to pay the price, that he had to pay the price, that he had to pay the cruel, bloody price, that he had to experience the same pain that Yuuri experienced before he could have the strength to keep going—his strength was no longer just from love and passion, but from There is pain and despair, and he draws strength from the abyss so he can get back up.The accident destroyed both of them.

Without JJ's push, he would never have returned to this stage.

But he still came back, as if there was an irresistible force in the dark, to make this show more grand and perfect.

And how does Yuuri feel about that?He didn't dare to peek to the right side of the stage, he knew Yuuri was there waiting to get in, but he also knew that he was watching him.

When Yuuri's eyes fell on him, his soul was agitated in his body, what happened next, who knows? "

According to the plot, the first and second acts are played by Victor. An arrogant teenager begins to have doubts about himself. He bids farewell to the people who dote on him and embarks on his own journey. Then his reckless and impulsive side begins to dominate. He, the devil, is on the scene.The existence of the devil and the boy are similar but different. The devil is more pure and paranoid. He encourages the boy and tempts him to do all kinds of bold and reckless things.

When JJ performs all this, he looks like a teenager who doesn't know himself well enough, he is full of energy and adventurous drive, but when Victor is on stage, you will never mix him with JJ confuses: he has distinct personal characteristics and understanding, his movements are full of beauty and the aftertaste unique to adults, the passion contained in his flowing dance steps is restrained, like a famous sword without its sheath: you know it The sharp edge, but it hides the dangerous side.He turned a confused teenager into a young man. He knew who he was and what kind of responsibilities he had. People worshiped him and followed him, and he once wanted to lead people without hesitation, until one day he began to doubt himself What is the meaning of all this, why does he exist, why does he have to shoulder some responsibilities?A teenager's self-doubt is like a wave on the beach, but a young man's thinking about the meaning of existence is like a tsunami: it comes to destroy everything, you don't know when it will recede, you don't even know if it will will recede.

Yuuri doesn't know if he understands it right, but he sees something completely different from JJ in Victor's performance - he used to have no resonance with the boy character, because his boyhood was timid and full of hesitation, he not only Once thought about what would happen if he had the impulsiveness and courage of the "demon", what would happen if he dared to express his feelings?He'll be covered in bruises, but will it really be worse than it is now?Maybe he'll be closer to that happy ending or not.But Victor's performance made him see himself-he has grown up, has a clear understanding of his own worth, but doubts whether he has more possibilities-if he tries again, whether Will it have a different ending?Do you want to be content with the status quo, or embark on an adventure again?

"That guy is really," Chris appeared next to Yuuri at some point, holding the helmet headset that Yang gave him, obviously thinking it was stupid, he also looked at Victor who was dancing solo, and only had that in his eyes The trajectory of people dancing-he noticed Yuuri's expression, and smiled at him, "The light on the stage is unique." He said, "It seems that it is a good thing for him to quit-no one would want to share with him Let's dance, anyone will be devoured by him, unless..." He laughed and looked at Yuuri, "Unless you have a different opinion?"

Yuuri didn’t know what to say, part of him agreed with Chris’s words, not only on stage, but even in life, Victor is radiant, his excellence is not only outstanding in appearance and talent, but also outstanding in quality and soul —a man like him, whose light is his prison, who is always solitary, even among men.Victor is alone, and Yuuri knows that.Sometimes he feels that Victor is no different from himself, they are all looking for a way to no longer be alone, a person who can free him from loneliness, but sometimes he also wonders, does this person really exist?

Is there someone who can make Victor no longer lonely?

If Yuuri could be better, better, softer - if he could be a better version of himself, could that... be him?

Chris' gaze had returned to the stage, and the second act was drawing to a close.

"I won't be swallowed." Yuuri said suddenly, "I won't."

He doesn't know where his courage and confidence come from—Victor will never lack people who love and follow him, Yuuri will never be the best one, but from the first day he fell in love with Victor , he had this idea: he will do everything in his power to chase after Victor, even if he is ridiculed for chasing the sun beyond his capabilities, he will not give up, he wants to catch up with Victor, even if he will fall after that, It doesn't matter if it's just a day, a second, a moment, because then, even if it's just a day, a second, a moment, he'll let Victor know: You're not alone.Someone is as lonely as you, and your presence illuminates that person's ordinary life - so please don't give up looking.

The one who can rescue you from the abyss will always come, just like you rescued me.

Victor exits and the lights dim again.The scene changed rapidly.

"It's your turn, Yuuri." He heard someone whisper in his ear.

——It's my turn.

I am coming.