[Wei Yong] Looking for Lilia

If Yuuri had been given the freedom to choose how to spend a meaningful evening with Victor, it definitely wouldn't be the way it is now.

He might propose to go to a concert together, or choose a Mexican movie at home (they used to enjoy this pastime because no one knew Spanish, so they would guess the meaning of some lines and plots, most of which were absurd no, and usually ends with "the aliens took everyone"), or nothing at all.

He'd rather do nothing, look at each other awkwardly in a hotel room with Victor, than be dressed up like a doll by him for an unplanned romantic encounter.

Katsuki Yuuri sat in front of the mirror with his hands clenched into fists on his knees, feeling extremely uncomfortable—the clothes he was wearing were the same as the sweatshirts he usually wears in terms of body feeling, but there was an extra zero on the price tag Come on, it made him feel puzzled and awkward, as if he was wearing a bondage suit; his hair was all combed up and fixed behind his head with styling mousse, and his exposed forehead was also disturbing. He looked around in the mirror. To myself, I think he is like those villains in clothes and beasts.His stylist walked around him twice with great interest, while looking up and down, while making a sound of "um--", which further deepened his feeling of being on pins and needles.

"Well, Victor—" Yuuri couldn't help but say, "It's almost..."

"Um…" Victor said, "Stand up, Yuuri."

He stood up, and then he thought again, no, why am I so obedient?But it would be too childish to sit down in a fit of anger. He could only stand in front of Victor honestly, with his arms outstretched, feeling like Da Vinci's human manuscript.

"Look around," Viktor ordered, looking serious, but that didn't wash away Yuuri's deepest suspicions that Viktor was playing tricks on him.If this is a joke, he prayed to himself, please start laughing now - then I can take off this expensive outfit, wash my hair and be my virgin 23 again.But Victor didn't.He pointed his chin with his fingers, as if thinking about something.

"Ah!" he said suddenly, "Got it... Yuuri, take off your glasses."

"what?"

"You don't have a high degree of prescription, it doesn't matter if you take off your glasses." Seeing that Yuuri didn't respond, Victor took the initiative to take off his glasses for Yuuri. "Look, all right?"

The line of sight suddenly became blurred, which made the air defense siren in Yuuri's mind blare to the highest pitch. His degree is indeed not deep. Compared with making the line of sight clear, the sense of concealment brought by the frame is more impressive He is obsessed with: For a long time, people looked at him with pity and sympathy in their eyes, bangs and mirror frames were like a layer of obstacles, which brought him an illusory sense of security and avoided him. Directly exposed to those gazes, burned to ashes and now stripped of both.

"Give it back to me!" he yelled, and Victor put the hands holding the glasses behind his back, dodging left and right to avoid Yuuri's snatch, which made Yuuri very frustrated. "Why can't you wear glasses?"

"Hmm." Victor said, looking down for a moment, he brought Yuuri's glasses to his face, raised his head and smiled, "Does it look good?"

To be honest, it is very good-looking, and this good-looking gives Yuuri a different impact than before: it is one thing to know that Viktor is good-looking, but when a fresh and completely different sense of beauty blooms in front of his eyes, what is it? It's another story.Any last ounce of Viktor's childlike innocence is also offset by the glasses, which make him look like a complete big shot, a bookish scholar, a smiling teacher who may have once been Yuuri's shield , but at this moment it has become a wall separating the two: Victor has already stood on the "adult" side, while Yuuri is still stranded on the "child" side.

Yuuri moved his lips, but said nothing.At this moment, Viktor suddenly leaned over to him, Yuuri's eyes widened in astonishment—Victor's nose almost poked Yuuri's cheek, his face was magnified countless times and appeared in front of Yuuri, so close The eyelashes are clearly counted.He blinked at Yuuri through his glasses.

"Look," he said, "get it?"

Yuuri found himself losing his voice. "...What?" He made a mosquito-like voice from his throat, their lips were too close, and he was afraid that a little carelessness would cause unnecessary contact, which was really embarrassing... His The brain gradually melted into a boiling paste.

As if amused by his embarrassment, Victor laughed, straightening up and pushing the frames of his glasses on the bridge of his nose. "Kissing is inconvenient." He said, "Isn't it, imagine..."

imagine what? !Yuuri screamed internally, not just because Victor made him picture himself kissing someone else, but more because—kissing? !What the hell? !Is he already thinking about this? !

He suddenly felt angry, and it was difficult to feel this feeling clearly before. Until this moment, he suddenly realized that Victor was really planning a date for him, just like every real lover Dude, like a good wingman, he really wants something to happen between Yuuri and that pretty girl (Sarah, or who?).

He had no reason to be angry, but he was angry nonetheless, and it felt like a nightmare that he hadn't remembered, where the content was blurred, but the fear was real, keeping him from falling asleep at two o'clock in the morning.He suddenly felt that this scene seemed familiar.

Victor suddenly smiled.

"It's the same as before, isn't it?" he asked softly. "Eighth or seventh? You accompany that high school girl to her school's nostalgic prom—what's her name?"

“That’s a great tie,” Victor says, twitching a sky blue tie like a cowboy with a hilarious “Yah!”It's Yuuri's only tie, given to him by his sister in sixth grade—supposed to be kind of a joke, "Where did you get it, 'forever virgin'?"

"No such brand." Yuuri grumbled, and snatched the tie from him. He was wearing a section of long trousers and a pale coral shirt that was too wide at the shoulders, and he looked like a child's version Real estate manager ads.He also realizes how inappropriate his grooming is, which is the main reason why he plans to sneak around behind Viktor's back - he always tries to avoid embarrassing himself in front of Viktor.But it always backfires, because Victor never seems to understand rejection.When Yuuri rejected his invitation to "come to my house to watch a movie" on the phone and hesitated and failed to give a reasonable explanation, the energetic boy climbed along the water pipe to the second floor of Yuuri's house, and The window was poked open with a wire.When Yuuri walks into his room holding his two embarrassing suits, Yuuri meets him with a big smile.

"So, first date, huh?" he grinned, and touched the top of Yuuri's head, "You've grown up too! Ugh, you seem to have picked up Mari's clothes by mistake." Yuuri had no choice but to bite the bullet Telling him that he had searched his closet and that this was the only suit that was close to his body type, and that, yes, the shirt was Mari's and the pants were left by Mari's boyfriend in tenth grade, and he didn't have any Not wanting to know what the boy did in his sister's room to leave pants behind, he just brought them all.

"So that's why you sneakily turned down movie night." Victor said behind him, and Yuuri awkwardly pulled his tie around his neck and started trying to tie a simple half-Windsor knot the way he learned it online - it should be simple...

He entangled himself.This is really frustrating.At the same time, Victor deliberately complained aggrieved: "You will regret it, the people in the video store said this is the Mexican version of "Die Hard."

"I've never even seen a real Die Hard!" Yuuri yelled, and he started grabbing the ends of the tie with all his might, but it got tighter and tighter, and he blushed.But the stubbornness of the teenager made him stubbornly refused to ask for help. Victor behind him hugged his arms and admired his struggle for a while, and finally stepped forward before he dropped his hands in complete despair, pulling his arm and turning him over He turned around and turned to himself.

"It's not like that," he said, sighing, and parted Yuuri's fingers, "You little idiot." He began to try to untie Yuuri's tangled tie, his warm breath and the strands of hair on his forehead It fell to the side of Yuuri's face, itching.

Yuuri looks at him, his heart beating fast - half shy, half annoyed at himself - and his mind goes blank, and he finds himself staring blankly at the tip of Victor's nose, under the shallow translucent skin, There is a small freckle that can hardly be seen. It used to be darker than now, but now it is gradually getting lighter. Sooner or later, it may disappear completely. By then, Victor will be truly perfect... He was lost in thought, completely oblivious to the fact that Victor had already loosened his tie and was asking him a question.

"So, who is she?" he asked. "Which girl stole the heart of my dear friend?"Yuuri looked up at him and smiled secretly.

"Her name is Yuko," he said, feeling his embarrassment melt away, and he began to wonder why he did this behind Viktor's back, when it was his favorite part, they did something together, whatever He wants Victor to be a part of everything, preferably forever, "She's three years older than me, and she lives down the street—she wanted me to go with her because she had a fight with her boyfriend The one at the party, because she doesn't want to be alone, and the other 11th grade boys are already in company - as friends." He added a sentence by accident, but Victor didn't seem to show any reaction when he heard this sentence , then again, why did he add a sentence, and why did he expect Victor to react?It would be strange for Victor to react...

Victor gave a short laugh and shrugged. "Friend, boyfriend, whatever." He said, and started to fold the ends of the tie together, making many patterns with his long and thin fingers, Yuuri wanted to look down, but he pushed up with his chin, " Look up." He ordered, "Is she pretty?"

"...beautiful," Yuuri said. "Did you forget? We were only at her birthday party last month."

"Remember," Victor said, "the girl who made the clown recite Shakespeare is yours.... Sigh." He suddenly sighed, and pulled the tie from Yuuri's neck, "I can't do it, this The tie is ugly, it should go to the incineration plant." He turned and flung himself over to Yuuri's bed, where his own backpack had been dumped, and he fished out a dark blue tie with silvery red shimmer on it , even though it was bundled in his backpack, it didn't have any creases at all, which was a world of difference from Yuuri's.He came over and put the tie around Yuuri's neck, he turned up the collar of Yuuri's shirt, his cold nails grazed the skin of Yuuri's neck, the boy couldn't help but giggle.

"It's itchy." He said, Viktor let out a casual "um", lifted his chin up again and pushed it up, Yuuri obediently tilted his head up.

"Listen," Victor said, "if you like her, don't care if she has a boyfriend or not, bring her flowers, take her out for a drink after the party or something. Your first love is about to happen."

"My..." Yuuri almost choked to death on his own saliva, he wanted to bow his head, but was pushed by Victor, "She's not my first love!" he shouted red-faced, "I'm just friends with her!"

From the corner of his eyes, he could see the corners of Victor's mouth pressed down, as if he didn't take it seriously at all, which made him even more anxious-"Really! Not..."

"I saw you secretly put her picture in your wallet!" Victor said briskly, "Little liar, you still want to lie to me..." He tied the bow tie, adjusted it, and pulled Yuuri's collar Putting it down and adjusting it again, he pinched Yuuri's nose, "Your nose is going to grow..."

Yuuri blushed.He hesitated twice. "No..." He said dully, "It's not like that..."

Victor smiled puzzled. "Okay, whatever." He said tolerantly and easy-goingly, took a step back and looked Yuuri up and down, and nodded with satisfaction as if he was looking at his own work.His indifference made Yuuri suddenly lose all motivation to defend himself.

"Why is there a tie in your bag?" he asked, not really interested in caring, just looking for a topic.Victor shrugged.

"Going to town for an audition," he said, eyes downcast, as if to say something completely inconsequential. "No big deal, 'that' dance school wants me straight in."

"What?!" Yuuri jumped up, "What? I mean, this is awesome! You've been listening to me talking nonsense for so long, and now you're just thinking about it? How did it work out?"

"..." Victor looked at him, and gradually, his brows frowned. "Passed," he said, "but I'm not going—I want to finish high school."

"But……"

"And the school is full of uninteresting people." Victor said again, "When I think about going to be with them now, ah...it's so depressing."

There's only one dance school that deserves to be referred to as 'that' at this time, and it's so famous that when people think of a good dance school, they immediately think of it, everyone, including Yuuri , all hoped to be admitted by it in the future, but Victor seemed unhurried, which really made people anxious.

"But you said high school was boring too," Yuuri said.

"Did I say that?" Victor touched the back of his head and laughed twice, "Okay, but I still have you!" He changed the subject so easily, "If you come back before nine o'clock, we can still Watch Die Hard for a while."

"Mexican version," Yuuri said reluctantly, but he took one last look at himself in the mirror, ill-fitting pants and a garish shirt, and an overly expensive, intricately tied tie , he suddenly felt very depressed again.

Victor had been admitted early, and I was a kid.he thought dejectedly.Haven't even seen Die Hard.

"Don't worry." Victor watched his reflection in the mirror behind him, "You're so cute, no girl would turn you down, buddy."

Victor smiled as if some memory had been awakened.

"You're so cute," he said. "No girl would say no to you, Yuuri."

And from the age of 12 to today, there is a question that has been on Yuuri's lips. Whenever he hears Victor say that, it always echoes in Yuuri's heart. He wants to spit it out, but he is afraid to spit it out , up to this moment, he didn't even have the courage to look directly at it.

--how about you?will you reject me