[Leilu Modern AU] Scarlet World

"What did you say?"

"Can you calm down, Louis? Can you accept what I'm going to say in your current state?"

Louis raised his palm and made a pause.He lowered his head, buried his face in the shadows, and tried to regulate his emotions.

The silence lasted about 10 minutes or even longer.Then, Louis raised his head, exhaled a long breath, and said in a more peaceful tone: "Please continue."

"I think...Vaner's death is full of doubts."

"Why did you say that?"

"Of course not the direct cause of his death," Lester replied. "As you said, he fell to his death from upstairs, which is no problem. He had taken a lot of drugs before his death, which produced a terrible Hallucination, there is no doubt about it. Anyone would believe that this was a suicide, and I believe that the police and the forensic doctor who dealt with this matter sounded exactly the same."

"Yes."

"You all think that Vanna lost his family when you left, so he converted to religion, wandered around all day long, and met some bad young people somewhere. He has money himself, so he can afford the consumption of heroin; his temper has changed. It was so bad that no one dared to enter his room casually, so his drug use was not discovered for a long time."

"Yes, after Vanner left us, we realized that, in fact, we didn't care enough about him. We only had a rough idea of ​​where he went every day, who he met, and what he did."

"You can only do this, Louis," Lester said. "You don't have to blame yourself too much on this point. Only a stalker will know a person's whereabouts like the back of his hand. This is a matter of privacy."

"But he's my brother."

"No one has the right to control other people's lives, Louis, whether you are his parents or his brother."

"......Um."

"After his death, did you also visit his situation before his death?"

"Yes, as I told you, he went to churches far away to attend mass all day long, and even neglected his studies. We talked to the priest of the church, and the old man said that Vanna was a devout believer and was willing to dedicate everything to God. We also tried to find out the truth about Vanner's drug use, but the result is the same as Ms. Payne's secret investigation before Vanner's death, and there is no trace."

"Has anyone seen the guy who sold him drugs?"

"No."

"Then at least someone has seen him associate with some bad people?"

"The priest said that sometimes when Vanner left the church, he would chat with a strange man in a small park far away. The man was wearing a fisherman's hat and sunglasses, and he couldn't see his face clearly. He only saw it occasionally. He couldn't remember clearly when he was old. "

"No one knows who that man is?"

"No, maybe some underground drug dealer in disguise."

"Sounds reasonable."

"Yes, all of us feel that Faner just made bad friends by mistake and became addicted to drugs, which led to..."

"You didn't continue to explore."

"I am in too much pain. I have been immersed in the grief of Vanner's death for a long time. I watched him buried in a daze, and then I went to trace the trajectory of Vanner's life. I walked past the church he often went to. I saw Countless people were celebrating Mass inside. We all have faith. Why did Faner choose to commit suicide to end his life? I sat by his tombstone and reminisced about the past, which lasted for about half a year... "

"And then never mention it again?"

"Never mention it."

"You are in the game, Louie," said Lester. "You cannot accept his depravity and death, and choose to avoid it. And the cause of his death—I mean immediate cause, is beyond all suspicion. What happened to him sounds like a reasonable fall for a rebellious teenager... Grief blinds your eyes, and you don't want to face his death again and again, because it makes everyone suffer. In the end, you Believe it was a tragic accident. And that's exactly where I disagree."

"Why, Lester?"

"From what you can see, what kind of person was Van Na before? I mean before you left home."

"He is a bit introverted and doesn't like to talk, but he is generous, kind-hearted, and willing to help others. We often donate some money and materials to the orphanage, and do some volunteer work at the same time."

"And before he started running to that church for mass after you left?"

"If you put it that way, there was indeed such a period of time, but it was very short, almost less than a month." Louis recalled, "At that time, my university just started, and Ms. Payne told me that everything was fine. Reading books and doing volunteer work. So I thought that Fan Na just couldn’t accept his relatives leaving him for the first time, coupled with the rebellious psychology of adolescence, it will be better after a while.”

"That is to say, at that time, Faner was only frustrated because of your departure, but his attitude towards life did not take a big turn."

"That's right."

"You see, you should understand, Louis." Lester explained, "Vanner's fall is not your fault at all, why do you choose to ignore this? You see, after you left, his life was not a short-lived one." Is it as usual? If he was obviously fine during this period, why did he suddenly start to give up on himself because of your departure after more than a month? "

"What do you want to say?"

"Let us divide the short life of little Fanna into three stages.

"The first stage is when he was born, before you left home. This is most of his life, and it is also your happy time.

"The second stage is after you leave home and before he starts to become a fanatical religious believer. During this short period of time, he feels worried because of your leaving. Maybe he is naturally emotionally vulnerable, so he is more sensitive to you. Dependent. More than half of his emotional backbone came crashing down after you left, but it wasn't enough to destroy him. He went about his life and tried to regulate himself. That's also very positive and fits your description of him.

"The third stage is when he was crazy about religion and drugs until he died. All his changes happened during this time. Not because of your leaving home. You didn't participate at all, Louie."

"If I hadn't left home, there wouldn't have been a third phase."

"You're here again, it's not necessarily related. Could it be that he can't live without being under your nose? Could it be that Vanner won't leave home when he grows up?"

"I......"

In order to prevent Louis from taking the responsibility on himself again and again, Lester decided to throw out all doubts in one go——

Why did Van Na, who was undergoing self-adjustment of his mentality, suddenly turn to religion?The religious beliefs in this country are almost highly unified, which makes everyone ignore the fanaticism of Vanner.If a non-religious person suddenly went crazy to worship the gods, people would naturally inquire into the motives.It's just because Faner has faith, so people ignore it.

What is the reason for Faner's obsession?Was it related to his insistence on going to that church?Did he insist on going there because of the place or some people there?The Pudula family has a wealth of assets, and it is not difficult to build a decent church in their own estate. If it is just to pray to the Lord, wouldn’t it be more convenient to follow the family’s advice?

Why did Faner start taking drugs?Where did he try this stuff?It's understandable if it's marijuana that many teenagers can't help but try out with curiosity, but is he smoking highly toxic heroin?The circulation of this thing in the market is often very secretive. Of course, money is needed, and more importantly, a way is needed. Without the introduction of an acquaintance, there is no way to find it.Fan Na, as a wealthy son of the upper class, is young, ordinary and introverted, and has never met any cronies. So, who set him up?

Vanner's emotions in the later period were extremely unstable.According to the description, he was sometimes furious and sometimes wept bitterly. Is this just the effect of drugs?Or is he bipolar?Or maybe he doesn't have a mental illness, but he has these emotions because of certain things, and they are magnified countless times under the stimulation of drugs?

There are too many doubts, but none of them have anything to do with Louis.

Lester's barrage of questions overwhelmed Louis.

He can put down his guard and tell his sad past nakedly for the first time after six long years; he can also discuss the details of Vanner's life and death with Lester in as peaceful a tone as possible after desperately building himself .But now, Lester's words and deeds are clearly forcing him to recall the cause of Vanner's death, which is the most painful part for Louis. He feels that he will be torn into pieces by these countless questions.

Louis collapsed and hugged his head, sweating profusely, and let out intermittent, whining-like groans.His appearance made Lester feel unbearable, but Lester insisted on finishing speaking.In this voice that seemed like a god-like statement, Louis’s pain kept amplifying, and finally he couldn’t bear it anymore. He really wanted to pray that Lester would stop attacking his long-established cognition like this, and he almost roared angrily. A: "Stop!"

Lester's chattering voice stopped abruptly.But it wasn't because of Louie's furious demands, it was because he had said all he wanted to say.Lester had deliberately sped up his speech when Louie was initially prone to breakdowns, and now his speech came to an end.

The huge room suddenly fell into silence, only the sound of Louis gasping heavily.Lester looked at Louis with a little worry, and the latter's eyes were erratic.

After a long time, Lester turned his gaze to the sky outside the window.

It was getting dark, and they sat here talking for hours, and now, as the night grew darker, he couldn't even see Louie's expression clearly.

Lester was going to turn on the light.

As soon as he stood up, Louis grabbed the corner of his clothes.

"Wait a moment."

Lester turned around.

"...Don't go." The drooping head begged almost like a lament.

Lester's heart seemed to be hit by something.His chest was filled with an indescribable taste, like accidentally biting a ripe, sweet and sour fruit overflowing with juice.

He sat down again, took Louis's hand that was holding the hem of his clothes with both hands, and squeezed it lightly.

The warmth from his skin comforted the cold Louis, so he extended his other hand, and Lester held them together kindly.

The sun had completely set, and the night had completely enveloped the earth, and the figures of the two of them were immersed in the thick darkness.There was no light in the room, not even the computer's standby fluorescent light, because Lester had no intention of working during most of the day waiting for Louis.

The street lamp outside the window kindly provided a little orange light source, but when that little light climbed to the corner of the room, it was already so bleak that it was almost gone.Although it can be considered exhaustive, it only allows Lester, who has good eyesight, to barely see the outline of Louis' body, instead of being blinded in the pure darkness.

With a cool night breeze, it seeped in through the half-opened window, and Louis shivered.Lester held Louis' hands in his hands, those slender and beautiful hands were not warm because of the chill in the master's heart.Lester held them to his mouth, taking a few breaths of hot air gently and carefully as if caring for a fragile newborn baby.The moist and warm air gently brushed over the back of Louis's hand, then swirled and dissipated.

At this moment, Lester noticed that the outline of Louis began to change in the darkness.In the night, Louis approached him slowly, and finally stopped in his ear, saying, "Thank you...Lester."

Then, Lester saw Louis's facial features gradually revealed and enlarged in the darkness - which meant that Louis' face was close at hand.Louis, who was close at hand, had thick and drooping eyelashes like crow feathers, they trembled a few times, covering those moist emerald green eyes.

In the next second, something soft and elastic was attached to the blond man's lips.

Lester closed his eyes.

TBC.

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