Yi Xing

"Ke Ke," Fu Yixing walked side by side with me on the river beach, "When I'm in a bad mood, I'll take the subway to see the Yangtze River."

The wind on the shore is strong, and the sound of the water is also loud.

I feel that autumn is coming.

Facing the Yangtze River and the changes of the four seasons, one's destiny is really too small.

"Fu Fu, do you believe in fate?" I picked up a stone and threw it into the river.

The splashes made by small stones are not as majestic as the fine white waves rolled up by the river water. I smiled and saw that the water waves became calm as they flowed.

The Yangtze River has traveled thousands of miles. It used to be infinitely jubilant, passing through cliffs and canyons impassionedly. After a long time in the world, it finally became peaceful and inclusive, but its momentum is still there.

It will continue eastward, to the sea.

Fu Yixing turned to face me, "I believe it." He said.

"Do you think fate is fair?"

He didn't speak.

I said again: "When I first met you, I thought you were unbelievably perfect. I have always believed that there is a rule in this world that controls a balance. For example, I may be better looking than ordinary boys. Some, the brain is easier to use than ordinary people, but my life is not so smooth, I am always experiencing parting. I would especially envy Tang Cheng, who had parents who grew up with him and spoiled him, so he just Like a child, he may not be so sensible, nor have outstanding talents. Uncles and aunts have been worrying that he will not be able to support themselves in the future, but this is also a kind of fairness.

But there seems to be nothing missing in your destiny.You are handsome, have good grades, have a happy family, and have a good personality.I would find it weird at first. "

"What happened later?" Fu Yixing asked.

"Later I found out that you also suffered a lot of setbacks. But I still think you are better than ordinary people. I think there may be unfairness. But I also feel that I have brought you misfortune, really, I think You have never experienced such a big setback before, you found out that you like boys, you were slandered behind your back, and you didn't do well in the competition."

A green leather train passed by on the bridge across the river in the distance, and the rumbling sound was already weakened by the air before it reached the ears.

Fu Yixing waited until the car drove away before replying: "Maybe it's a setback, but you didn't bring it. I didn't like to get along with girls since I was a child. It will be a matter of time before I find out that I like boys. There must be some people who can't accept it." My sexual orientation, but I don't care what those people say about me behind my back. As for the competition, it's just a way. I didn't plan to take the recommended way at the beginning. I don't really want to study mathematics. You say these are A setback might be a turning point for me."

He smiled, and I saw him smile, and I felt joy in my heart.

Fu Fu continued: "I never thought liking was such a good experience before. Just like what you said in your speech, love is beautiful. I only realized it later. I don't have to worry about it if I fail the competition exam, and I don't have to worry about it. Someone will let me study mathematics, and I can study my favorite major. I think these are turning points. The future will develop in a good direction.”

I'm a little jealous of the boy Fu Fu likes.

How lucky he must be to be loved by such a wonderful person.

I wanted to ask who he was, but the words turned into "What major do you like...?"

"I want to study architecture."

There was a deep longing in his eyes.

I knew he really wanted to study architecture.

Because there is light in the eyes of those who have dreams.

Where is my dream then?

"You wait for me here for a while." He ran away.

I took out my phone and took a picture, and wrote it down in the memo, "On September 9, the weather was fine, and I went with Fu Yi by the river. He said he wanted to study architecture, and I hope his dream will come true."

Looking at the photos on the memo and the line I typed, I suddenly felt very happy.

Turning back to the list of memos, I saw that the last one was written on May 5nd. I don’t really remember what happened that day. When I opened it, I saw a bird’s-eye view of the city. The text below the photo reads: “On May 2nd, the weather Qing, traveling with Fu Yi at Toutuo Ridge. I hope he can be happy."

I also wrote a memo on the last day of last year. I remember that day with a deep impression.

"December 12st, the weather is fine, New Year's Day celebration, food festival, the bookmark given by Fu Yixing, very delicate, I like it very much."

I never cared that I had the habit of writing sticky notes. Every time I wrote it on the spur of the moment, the sentence structure remained consistent.

Every day I write a memo is a sunny day.

Fu Yixing is all around.

I suddenly felt that the gullies in my heart were filled with honey.

Fu Yixing came back with two cups of coffee.

I took the paper cup and it was still hot.

"It's a bit cold here, drink something warm to keep you warm."

The air conditioner was still on in the bedroom last night.

At this moment, being blown by the river wind, I have to rely on hot coffee to warm my hands.

I laughed out loud.

Fu Yixing was a little too cautious.

He didn't understand what I was joking about, and drank his coffee alone.

I clinked glasses with him and said to him sincerely: "Thank you, Fu Fu, thank you for pulling me out of the mire."

Fu Yixing curled his lips, "I didn't do anything."

I smiled and didn't answer again.

He also said: "You can get out on your own. I always feel that there is only one person in this world who can complete self-salvation by himself, and external help is very secondary. I don't mean the problem of depression. It’s just some spiritual dilemma, you want to get out, you have longing for life and the future, so even without me, you can get out.”

"Then go one? Toast to the future." I picked up the coffee and gestured to Fu Yixing.

The paper cups collided without much sound.

Fu Yixing said: "Respect the future."

All the pathos are left in last night.

Just like I planned, I want to make a deal with Zou Yi'an.

I'm fed up with him dominating my emotions.

I'm fed up with recurring nightmares.

I wanted a break, so I went for it.

I didn't expect it to be that intense, but for me, I've done it with him.

From now on, I will still miss my parents and the police uncle, but I will only be sad because of missing, and will no longer be terrified because of fear.

I did it myself.

But the existence of Fu Yixing is also very important.

He keeps reminding me that I'm a good person.

If someone believes in this way, I will not fall.

If he believes in me, I can't let him down.

"Actually, I'm still a little worried, Zou Yi'an, is it true that he won't come again?"

"My sixth sense says he won't. But that's not necessarily true."

"Then let's go to your uncle now, he's better than you."

I nodded.

We took the bus to the traffic police again.

Uncle Hong was a little surprised to see us wearing school uniforms. I explained what happened to him, and Fu Yixing also copied the recording to him.

Uncle Hong contacted his old acquaintances in the criminal police team and arranged some "bodyguards" for me.

I believe those bodyguards are real, but I have never distinguished them from passers-by.