Fast-travel female supporting role and re-employment

This lonely and somewhat desolate railway station entrance completely pushed Miaoyin's disturbed mood to the peak.

Miaoyin doesn't want to stay here for a moment, she wants to leave, she wants to go back to the mountains, her life should be like that.

Miaoyin asked the drivers one by one, and finally a driver who asked for a price 50 yuan higher than others agreed to take her off.

The driver asked for the price, put the luggage in the trunk for Miaoyin, and said: "Do other drivers not pick you up? Their families are all in the county. They will take you up the mountain and then back. They can only pull you A job is not cost-effective, if I didn’t stop by to go home, I wouldn’t take your job, it’s not easy to go up the mountain at this time.”

Miaoyin nodded yes.

On Yulin Mountain, leaving the last concrete road behind and only the bumpy loess road in front of the car, the driver was even more flustered than Miaoyin. He asked almost every 2 minutes: "Did you remember the wrong way?" ? You can’t see anything at night, and there are no street lights.”

Miaoyin said firmly: "It's not wrong."

But the car walked for another 5 minutes, the driver stopped the car, and he said to Miaoyin in a hurried and slightly nervous voice: "I can't go up, it's not that I won't take you up, I will take you up, and I can't get down .”

The moonlight on the mountain is as clear as water, but the woods are disorganized. Especially at night, every road looks similar, and the insects and birds are constantly singing, as if there are two worlds below the mountain. The most terrifying thing is that as long as people think about it, they will stop Can't stop.

Miaoyin looked at the moonlight outside, nodded and said yes.

After collecting the money, the driver felt uneasy about leaving a little girl on the road, so he walked up a little bit and came to the dilapidated mountain temple. There was a small open space to turn around. The driver chattered for a while, Then he put down Ke Lan's luggage and said, "I can only take you here."

Miaoyin nodded and said, "Thank you."

The mountain temple is also a mountain temple built decades ago. It is built of stone mixed with soil and straw. It is only a small house as tall as one person. Some of the green tiles on the top have fallen off, and the old wooden door was eaten out by insects and ants. There are mottled holes, only the three characters "Mountain Temple" deeply engraved on the big stone at the door are still there.

The driver had already gotten into the car, got down again, and stood at the entrance of the mountain temple to worship.

Then without stopping for a moment, he slammed the car door, kicked the accelerator and left.

Miaoyin was carrying a bag, holding a suitcase in one hand, and carrying several bags in the other hand. She walked forward under the moonlight, and the sound of the suitcase's rollers gurgling on the ground startled the sleeping birds away.

She walked on the mountain road for more than an hour, and stood in front of Yulin nunnery, panting.

The door was closed, the words on the wooden plaque on the top, and under the moonlight, a little silhouette could be seen vaguely. Miaoyin stood there with her head up, feeling that all the fatigue and dust had been removed in an instant. She was silent for a long time, and then told her nephew Made a phone call.

"Are you asleep? Open the door for me. I'm back. Don't disturb them."

Several nephews lived in the same room. After receiving the call, they looked at each other and concluded that the little uncle must have been bullied at the foot of the mountain!Otherwise, I won't come back at this time.

Several people hurriedly came to open the door with their clothes on, afraid of being discovered by the master, they did not dare to turn on the lights, they squeezed at the door and watched Miaoyin carefully.

Miaoyin distributed the gifts she had prepared to them, "Go to sleep."

Several nephews took it over and looked at each other again, it must be a big deal.

"Uncle, why are you back now?"

Miaoyin pursed her lips, pulled the box and said, "Come back and see you."

Her backpack and suitcases were picked up by her nephew, and several people gently sent her back to the room. Miaoyin stood at the door and said, "It's getting late, go to sleep."

After she finished speaking, she paused and said, "Don't worry, I'm fine."

A few senior nephews were speechless in astonishment, would a young senior uncle say such a thing?What did you experience at the foot of the mountain?

Miaoyin was a little embarrassed, but she was really not in the mood right now and didn't want to say too much.

Several nephews winked at each other and dared not speak, and it was indeed very late, Miaoyin came back in a hurry, and should sleep first, and they don't know anything now, and they don't know what to say, what if they say Something is wrong, I'm afraid it will make her sad.

Miaoyin stood by herself for a while, then closed the door and went to the front hall.

The door of the main hall is never locked, and the door is only closed at night. Candles are lit on the altar table in the room. The candlelight flickers dimly, illuminating the melons and fruits on the table that are no longer so fresh. Solemn and solemn.

Miaoyin added a candle, knelt down on the futon, kowtowed, and closed her eyes.

In the middle of the night, Ming Tang, who was in charge of adding candles, pushed open the door of the main hall with a sleepy face, almost fainting from fright on the spot.

Miaoyin's back seems to have turned into a statue, and no one can disturb her.

Ming Tang called her anxiously: "Little Martial Uncle?"

Miaoyin remained motionless. .

"Uncle, why didn't you sleep?"

Miao Yin finished reading the scriptures silently in her heart, frowned slightly, and said, "It's nothing, I have something to think about, you can go to sleep."

Although it is midsummer, it is still very cold at night on the mountain. Miaoyin is still wearing the short sleeves she wore when she returned to the mountain. It seems that she came here without changing her clothes.

Miaoyin's face was very solemn. When she was at the foot of the mountain, she thought that she was tempted by the prosperity and novelty of the mountain and Ke Lan's charm, and the surrounding environment was disturbed, which affected her practice, and thus she had unwanted evil thoughts.

But after she came back, she knelt and sat in front of the Buddha statue alone, and found that her heart was not only not calm, but even more chaotic.

She kept silent, Mingtang felt something was wrong.

After walking in and taking a look, when the coolness gradually permeated, Miaoyin was still sweating and didn't respond to her shouts, Mingtang panicked a little, she squatted beside Miaoyin, and murmured in a hurry Buddha's name, raised the volume and called her: "Little Master?!"

Miaoyin closed her eyes tightly, her back was as straight as a green pine and a jade bone, even the muscles and nerves of her whole body were tense, and the blood vessels and veins on her forehead burst out and popped.

Mingtang staggered to his feet in a panic, almost fell to the ground, and was about to rush out to call for someone. She threw herself on the door frame. The old wooden door frame seemed unable to bear the weight of the attack, and made an unbearable creaking sound. .

Miaoyin spoke, and she whispered, "Come back."

Miaoyin is young, but her seniority is high. Most importantly, her cultivation achievements are worthy of the admiration of her senior nephews. Therefore, although Miaoyin seldom makes any requests, as long as she speaks, everyone loves her. listen.

Hearing Miaoyin's words, Mingtang felt relieved, stood up while holding the door frame, and asked: "Little uncle, what's wrong with you?"

Miaoyin knelt and still didn't get up, her slightly thin back was as clear as a bamboo, in the dim candlelight, as if hiding some heavy secret, tense as if she was always on the verge of danger.

Seeing this, Ming Tang let out a breath of relief, even more nervous.

Miao Yin said: "It's nothing, I just felt a little uncomfortable just now."

She lowered her head, her eyes sank in the darkness, staring at the futons in the shape of layers of lotus flowers that could not be seen clearly on the ground, and said softly: "Go to sleep, it's too late, don't call them, I'll be there right away." go to bed."

Ming Tang leaned against the door frame, cautiously asked tentatively: "Little Martial Uncle, if you feel uncomfortable, just say it, don't keep it in your heart."

"I'm not feeling well." Miaoyin closed her eyes, was silent for a while, and then said, "Go to sleep, I want to stay by myself for a while."

It seemed that there was no discomfort, and the tone of voice sounded very stable. It didn't look like there was any pain in his body. Mingtang frowned, thinking about it, he really didn't know what went wrong, but he didn't dare to just leave like this. After all, it was late at night. She was a little worried that Miaoyin would have an accident alone.

She simply walked over again, lit a candle, knelt down beside Miaoyin, and said, "I can't sleep right now."

Miaoyin didn't say a word, she kept her head down and stopped chanting.

Just as Mingtang was about to say something, his gaze followed Miaoyin's gaze, and landed on her empty wrist, he said in surprise, "Hey? Where's your string of beads?"

Miaoyin pursed her lips and said, "Give it away."

"Give it away?" Tomorrow's eyes widened in surprise, and he read it several times in disbelief.

Everyone in the nunnery knows how much the little master loves the string of Buddhist beads. She chopped the wood herself and polished it out one by one. For that string of beads, Miaoyin specially offered it on it. After reading the scriptures for a long time, she felt that with her own pious offerings and nurturing in the nunnery, it was almost her natal magic weapon, which was connected with her heart, and was second only to the string in the nunnery master's hand in preciousness.

Will give it away? !

Miaoyin didn't seem to want to talk about it, and didn't answer.

Mingtang nodded, and found a reason for himself: "Give it to someone who is destined? It must be a very special person, otherwise the little uncle will not give this gift easily."

Miaoyin frowned slightly, her lips moved slightly, she neither recited the scriptures nor spoke, as if she swallowed the words when they reached her lips.

Mingtang felt that something was not quite right, the little uncle, since elementary school, was not an ordinary person, he seemed to be born with a Buddha bone, he thought clearly, and his style was decent, he was particular about everything and said nothing to others. Do not hide and avoid.

But now this is obviously something hidden in his heart, and he doesn't want to say it yet.

Ming Tang tentatively asked: "Little uncle, how is your life at the foot of the mountain this month? I heard from Master that the benefactor Ke who picked you up is a star and a nice person. She didn't bully you, did she?"

Miaoyin's eyes dodged uncomfortably, her face was serious, and she slowly shook her head, saying, "It's nothing, Master Ke, he is indeed a good person."

Although she is the assistant of Donor Ke, unless she is very busy, she will be asked to fetch water from a lunch box. She usually does it by herself, and she has taught her a lot. In terms of taking care of her, it is actually Donor Ke who takes care of her more.

Mingtang felt a little suspicious, wondering if Miaoyin's change had something to do with this benefactor Ke, but when she asked again, Miaoyin stopped talking.

She knelt silently on the futon, like a meditative statue, with all the thoughts in her heart engraved in it.

Ming Tang didn't leave, she just yawned and waited beside her. When it was dawn, she estimated that it was almost time, and then she got up, stretched her waist restrainedly, and said, "Little Uncle, I'm leaving first."

Miaoyin nodded.

Mingtang said again: "You should go back to sleep earlier, I won't have morning class today."

Miaoyin said nothing.

Ming Tang walked out of the main hall door slowly and calmly. As soon as the figure left the door, he ran to look for Jing Ku, his eyes were wide open, and the fine lines around the eyes were flattened, and he said to Jing Ku: "Master, don't you?" Well, the little uncle came back last night and knelt in the hall all night, I don't think something is right."

Jing Ku frowned, and a hint of worry appeared on her old, swollen face. She looked up at the hall and said, "Go to sleep, I'll go and have a look."

Although Mingtang was tired, he couldn't fall asleep. In just a few seconds, almost everyone in the nunnery woke up. Seeing Mingtang, he even asked her why she got up so early.

Mingtang babbled, didn't dare to say that Miaoyin was abnormal, so he said, "I woke up when I couldn't sleep."

The air in the mountains is particularly fresh and chilly in the morning. Take a deep breath and you will immediately feel refreshed.

Jing Ku is getting older, and she takes every step slowly, but she doesn't like to be supported by others, and feels that she has not reached the point where she is too old to walk.

Miaoyin was still kneeling in the hall, solid as a rock, motionless.

Jing Ku's footsteps are obvious, heavy, slow, and have a strange rhythm.

So as soon as she came in, Miaoyin heard it. After hearing this voice, she bent her back instantly and said in a low voice, "Master."

Jing Ku walked over slowly, like a greeting from an elder who hadn't seen him for a long time, "What time are you back?"

Miaoyin lowered her head and said, "It's not until twelve o'clock."

Jing Ku lighted the incense, twisted the Buddhist beads in her hand, never mentioned the fact that she knelt all night, and only said: "Are you hungry? Get up and eat some steamed buns."

Miao Yin didn't move, she looked up at the Buddha statue that was wiped clean but slightly mottled in color, closed her eyes, and said, "Master, I've been drinking."

"Yeah." Jing Ku stood aside, supported the desk, and said in a deep voice, "You're an adult, as long as you don't drink too much, that's fine."

Miaoyin opened her eyes, looked up at Jingku, frowned and said, "Master, I broke the precept."

Jing Ku put his hand on her head, pressed it slightly, and said with a smile: "You are not considered a formal Buddhist disciple. Since you have not received full precepts, there is no breach of precepts. You came back this time because you drank alcohol? "

Miao Yin felt that Jing Ku's words made her helplessly distressed, but also felt ashamed.

"I don't know where to start."

Jing Ku sat on the chair next to him and said, "Then wait until you think it over."

Jing Ku began to knock on the wooden fish on his own, the hollow sound made people feel calm.

The two were silent with each other. After a long time, the senior sisters, nephews and nephews outside pretended to pass by one after another. Finally, their footsteps became slower and slower, and they all crowded at the door.

Miaoyin lowered her head and said, "I seem to like someone."

The sound of the wooden fish paused, Jing Ku put down his hand, and looked at Miao Yin with a pair of turbid and vicissitudes of gentle eyes, as if not surprised at all, not surprised, just nodded and asked: "What kind of person is that?"

Miaoyin pursed her lips tightly, and after a few seconds of silence, she said, "She's fine, but I can't."

"You can." Jingku bent down with difficulty, met Miaoyin's eyes, and said, "You just grew up here, but you are not a formal Buddhist disciple. You can fall in love, get married, and have children just like other girls. Children, it is not the precepts that bind you, but yourself."

Miaoyin pursed her lips tightly.

She has been living here for more than ten years. She regards herself as a member of Yulin Nunnery. She reads scriptures, studies Buddhism, attends Buddhist colleges, and writes Buddhist thesis. She has long been prepared to devote her whole life to this nunnery. .

But now, the master actually said that she was not.

Miaoyin frowned, knelt on the spot stubbornly, pursed her lips tightly and did not say a word.

Jing bitterly sighed in her heart. If it is said that the Buddha was born with enlightenment, Miaoyin is almost born, and she is smart. If the place where she was abandoned at the beginning was not Yulin Mountain, but the gates of those big temples, she would have better resources. A better environment, and a better future.

The most important thing is a better future.

In fact, Yulin Nunnery has no subsidy in the past two years, and few people will go up the mountain to burn incense piously. This place has gradually become a small corner forgotten by the world, but this kind of reason is useless to Miaoyin of.

Jing Ku looked into Miaoyin's eyes seriously, sighed and said: "Yesterday you thought about it all night, and I ask you, can you let that person go completely? You won't miss it if you don't meet it, and you won't be moved if you meet it again. After a long separation, can you do it without regret now when you think back on it?"

Miaoyin just opened her mouth.

Jing Ku shook his head and said, "You can't, you won't lie."

Miaoyin shut her mouth dejectedly, not even giving her a chance to lie.

Jing Ku smiled, as if this matter was expected for her, she changed the angle and said: "Cultivation is not limited to the form, it is practiced everywhere, it is practiced in the mountains, and it is also practiced when going to the downtown area. , You can practice by guarding the Buddha statue, and you can practice by guarding your lover. If you can’t let her go, then staying on the mountain is just torture, not practice.”

This is the first time Miaoyin has heard such a point of view, but after thinking about it carefully, there seems to be no logical error.

Jing Jing continued without changing his expression: "Life is a practice, so falling in love is also a practice. The real practice is to face it, pick it up and put it down, not escape. If you really want to escape into Buddhism, then you You should go down the mountain to accept, pick up, and then really let go, instead of deceiving yourself and letting others down."

Miaoyin frowned, her face was solemn, she knew that it was wrong for her to escape back, that is, she broke her word and broke her promise, and she couldn't make a choice in her heart, so she suffered a lot.

Jing Ku stood up, patted her on the shoulder, and said, "Go back after breakfast."

The few people around the door looked shocked one by one. Seeing Jing Ku come out, they didn't dare to ask, but they all heard what they said just now.

In fact, there is only Miaoyin in the nunnery, and I sincerely hope that she can stay and continue Yulin nunnery. They are different from Miaoyin. They came to Yulin nunnery to become monks for some reasons, and half their lives have passed, and they depend on each other, but in a few decades Well, they turned into a bunch of bad old women, so they could only rely on Miaoyin to take care of themselves. When they died, Miaoyin might be the only one left in this mountain.

At that time, loneliness and loneliness will become another kind of terrible torture.

It's just this kind of thinking, they have never said it out loud.

Miaoyin looked up at the Buddha statue, with her palms folded, her gaze firm and pious.

"If I can't let go of her, I can't hold up the Buddha."

Miaoyin stood up solemnly and solemnly, bowed devoutly to the Buddha, turned around slowly but firmly, and walked out of the main hall door.

Her knees were already stiff and red and swollen after kneeling all night, and her walking posture was very awkward. Every step was accompanied by piercing pain, but she didn't stop. She walked into the room step by step, and brought the gift she brought back last night to I left my senior sister and master.

Mingtang brought her a towel to wrap her legs, Miaoyin ate breakfast in a hurry, then took her luggage, quietly left a month's salary in the senior sister's room, and left again.

Jing Ku forbids others to help her down the mountain. If she walks up by herself, she must walk down by herself. Take this as a warning and don't evade easily, but they still follow from a distance, until they are halfway up the mountain, watching Miaoyin's back disappear into the woods inside.

The road down the mountain was not easy. Miaoyin had a knee injury, and it felt like she was wading through thorns all the way. When she reached the foot of the mountain, she took a bus to Yulin County Railway Station, but now there was no train back from Yulin County, so she turned again. The car went to the city, bought the earliest train ticket, and there was no seat for seven hours.

It was already midnight after leaving the train station, and Miaoyin's legs were already numb with pain, but she felt that she was more relaxed than ever, even the hot, stuffy and airtight air seemed to be lighter.

Miaoyin took a taxi and returned to the familiar hotel. It was 51 hours since she left.

She took out her ID card and handed it to the front desk to rebook the room.

The receptionist looked at it and said, "Are you Ke Lan's assistant?"

A sense of panic rose in Miaoyin's heart. She squeezed the handle of the suitcase tightly, nodded in response, and asked, "What's wrong? Has she left?"

"Oh, not yet." The waiter returned the ID card to Miaoyin and said, "But they are leaving tomorrow, and they will only stay for tonight. Are you looking for friends or booking a room?"

Miaoyin frowned, "I..."

"No more, she sleeps with me."

Ke Lan was wearing pajamas, standing at the elevator entrance not far away, looking at Miaoyin with gentle eyes and starlight, stretched out his hand, and said with a smile: "Welcome back, I should pick you up."

She knew from 233 that Miaoyin was coming back, so she ran all the way downstairs and called Miaoyin when she was booking a room.

"I'm still thinking, if you don't come tomorrow, I'm leaving. I've acted in many scenes that I missed, but I don't want to experience it on myself."

Miaoyin held her ID card in one hand and the box in the other. She looked at Ke Lan and walked towards her.

Ke Lan frowned instantly, rushed over in a hurry, took the box from Miaoyin with one hand, looked down at her legs, and asked, "What's wrong with your legs?"

Miaoyin didn't take her eyes off Ke Lan's face for a moment. Seeing Ke Lan's worry and panic, there was a secret sweet current in her heart, and she was afraid of being discovered by Ke Lan, so she dodged her eyes and said in a low voice: " nothing."

When I just want to see you, it doesn't matter anymore.