Spring Breeze Crossing Guanshan

Perhaps it was because he hadn't cried like this for a long time, and later, although Yan Chunxi had no more tears, his body couldn't stop twitching involuntarily, and it took a long time before he regained his composure.

The candle was extinguished at some point, and in the secret darkness, Guan Junchen lay on the bed with his arms around the boy.

This kind of hug has never happened since the peach blossom season this spring. Looking back now, the lingering years between the two people at that time were so beautiful.

Guan Junchen lowered his head and whispered softly in Yan Chunxi's ear: "Good Xier, my little thing is over, everything is over...forgive me, okay?"

In front of Yan Chunxi, he always seemed to be a completely different person from the gloomy and indifferent him in the past.

Even before all this happened, when Yan Chunxi was only his son of Heyuan, he always had to take pains to restrain his desire to treasure this young man, so as to maintain his noble status.

But from now on, he finally didn't have to restrain himself anymore.

"I don't want to be Mr. Crane Garden..."

Yan Chunxi buried his face in Guan Junchen's shoulder, because his voice was dry from crying, and his voice was very low when he spoke.

"The title is not important." Guan Junchen smiled lowly, kissing the soft earlobe of the young man: "I know what you want - just follow what you said before, and I will listen to you. I don't want anyone in the Eighteenth Crane Garden, as long as you by my side."

"No, I don't want these..."

Yan Chunxi, who had been hiding in his chest all this time, suddenly shook his head vigorously. He struggled to raise his head, his eyes were slightly red and swollen from crying, but the strange thing was that those eyes gradually condensed from the previous apathy and despair. She showed a stubborn look: "Now I don't want those anymore. My lord... I, I want to do something."

Guan Junchen was stunned for a moment, feeling a little dazed for a moment.

He stroked Yan Chunxi's soft hair, and asked in a low voice, "What? Do something?"

"Yeah." Yan Chunxi raised his head and looked at Guan Junchen, "My lord, I don't want to be a raised Mr. Heyuan, and I don't really want to be a servant who serves people all the time. I want... I want to learn something, I want to know What are you busy with, you want to know the situation of the court, you want to understand the affairs of the palace and the fiefdom...I want to know you like Guanshi Wang."

In the night, his expression was still a bit dazed, but his eyes became clearer and clearer as he spoke.

He paused, and said seriously: "I read books before I was convicted, and I can understand those approval documents and files. If you do something wrong, you can scold me severely, and I will definitely punish you." Study hard, okay?"

"Row."

Guan Junchen agreed straightforwardly, but then hesitated for a moment, and suddenly asked hesitantly: "Xi'er, you still can't forgive me, can you?"

Yan Chunxi lowered his eyes slightly when he heard this, and after a long silence, he finally said softly: "My lord, I... I can't just go back to the past with you like this. I can't be as close to you again, I can't be with you like that again Happy."

Those were really cruel words, although Guan Junchen still hugged the boy like this, he still felt a chill.

In his dark Danfeng eyes, there was a trace of helpless pain.

He didn't speak, just listened quietly.

"Last time you told me that you said I was young and didn't understand many things. In the past few days, I always wondered what I don't understand. Am I really ignorant? But the past you hurt me, And it is indeed true. Up to now, my heart still hurts. The more I think about it, the more confused I become... Sometimes I feel that what you said is right, and sometimes I think it is not right. The longer I think about it, the more confused I become."

"But today, just now, when you hugged me, I suddenly figured it out. In fact, the answer to all this - after all, I have to find it myself. I can't ask you for an answer forever. I'm always afraid. I want to get to know you in a dignified way, and I want to understand all the things I don't understand...My lord, you teach me—teach me how to do things, teach me to grow up, okay?"

Yan Chunxi spoke softly, his tone was very calm.

It seems that he has completely recovered from the extreme fragility and helplessness, and his almond eyes in the night gradually revealed an extremely firm expression.

An unspeakable tenderness gradually appeared in Guan Junchen's eyes, and there was even a little bit of pride in that tenderness.

How amazing his little guy is, he seemed to be able to see this 17-year-old boy gradually grow into a tall and straight youth in this night.

He patted Yan Chunxi's head, and said in a hoarse voice: "Little guy, you won't forgive me, but you will trust me, won't you?"

Yan Chunxi looked at him, with a faint gleam in his eyes.

He hesitated for a moment, then nodded. He seemed to have thought of something, and his voice trembled involuntarily: "Actually, when I looked at that well tonight, tonight, the mouth of the well... was so deep and so dark. Then I was a little dizzy, and the thought of jumping actually floated in my heart. But at that moment, I broke out in a cold sweat, I, I was not reconciled."

"I'm afraid, but I'm not afraid of anything else. I'm afraid that if I really can't hold on for a while, I close my eyes and jump down. I'm terrified, and then I think, I think... I don't want to die, I never want to die." .I want to live, I want to find you. You will save me, I am sure of this in my heart. Lord, you may find it strange, but I really believe in you, even when I can't believe it, I will always believe in you Really, you are the person I rely on the most in this world."

Guan Junchen could no longer control himself when he heard this, he hugged Yan Chunxi tightly in his arms, as if he wanted to press the young boy's soft body into his chest.

"My Xi'er..." Guan Junchen's voice trembled slightly, and he called out in a low voice: "My little baby, how can you, why are you so smart?"

He couldn't contain the surge of emotion, and he loved it so much, so much.

The little guy in his arms is not only extremely strong and strong, but also has a brain that is more transparent than anyone else in the world.

Even if you are in a desperate situation, you can still keenly find a way to survive at the last moment, never try to be brave, never give up.

If he hadn't fallen in love with such an extraordinary young man, the relationship between them might have come to the end of the road, and Yin and Yang were separated.

How could he not love Yan Chunxi like this.

Maybe it was because of Guan Junchen's sudden tight hug that Yan Chunxi couldn't help being a little emotional. He lay down on his soft body, and suddenly put his warm face close to Guan Junchen's ear, and whispered softly: " Brother Cheng, I will hide in your arms for one more night, just one night... I will grow up tomorrow, okay?"

"En." Guan Junchen responded in a low voice, he hugged Yan Chunxi tightly with his arms, and kissed the young man on the forehead.

Yan Chunxi's body was stiff, he was a little overwhelmed and wanted to turn his head, but he still didn't struggle too hard after all.

Although the two bodies were separated by clothes, but they were so close to each other, Guan Junchen still couldn't help feeling a burst of burning from the bottom of his heart to his skin.

With this kiss, his breathing suddenly became heavy, and he couldn't help turning over and pressing Yan Chunxi under him.

How could the young man not feel the dangerous and lustful atmosphere of Guan Junchen at this time, so he pushed Guan Junchen's chest in a panic.

But how could his strength be compared with Guan Junchen's, being restrained by Guan Junchen in such a way, he was like a small animal held under the claws of a ferocious beast, and there was no possibility of breaking free.

Guan Junchen couldn't restrain himself anymore, turned his head and kissed Yan Chunxi's soft lips fiercely.

The long-lost sweet taste made him lose his mind for a moment, and he couldn't help biting his full lips, grinding them roughly with his teeth.

As he was kissing, one hand had already reached into Yan Chunxi's skirt, wantonly stroking the soft and sensitive milk bead on the young man's chest.

"Uh, uh, don't..." Yan Chunxi curled up in vain, trying to escape, but Guan Junchen held his neck with the other hand, but with a little force, he forced him to raise his head and opened his mouth involuntarily, letting Guan Junchen The lips and tongue completely entered the raging.

Yan Chunxi's body was restrained by Guan Junchen, he was so anxious that even a few drops of sweat appeared on his smooth forehead.

He was also forced to the point of last resort. If he didn't stop him, he might be forced to enter under Guan Junchen's body. He really couldn't bear that.

Yan Chunxi finally pressed his teeth hard and bit the tip of Guan Junchen's tongue.

"Hiss, you..." Guan Junchen gasped in shock, and immediately let go of the boy with a livid face.

The tip of the tongue was bitten by Yan Chunxi, of course it was painful, so he quickly pressed his index finger on the tip of the tongue and looked down. Seeing that there was no bleeding, his face finally looked better.

If in the past, Guan Junchen had lost his interest in being bitten by such a bite in the face of lust, he would have been furious already.

But at this moment, looking down at the young man below him, he really felt angry and didn't know who to attack.

Yan Chunxi raised his head, looked at him softly with a pair of almond eyes, and after a moment of silence, he suddenly stretched out his hand and pulled Guan Junchen's lapel: "I, I didn't bite hard..."

Guan Junchen didn't know whether to laugh or cry, when he opened his mouth, he couldn't help but his face twisted in pain, and the words in his mouth trembled: "So, you are still being merciful?"

"I just don't want to do that, I just said it. I haven't figured it out yet, and I don't want to be your Mr. Heyuan..." Yan Chunxi turned his head a little unhappy, and whispered: "You still don't listen to me , and forced me again..."

Guan Junchen was at a loss for words for a moment, he was really afraid of the word "forced".Although I felt that something was wrong, but I couldn't say clearly, so I had to defend weakly: "Little thing, didn't you say it yourself, you still don't grow up tonight, and you still want to stay in my arms...?"

"I'm not, that's what I mean." Yan Chunxi looked at Guan Junchen, with a look of grievance in his eyes: "I haven't fallen asleep for a long time, and I'm very tired. I want to say...you hold me, Then I slept more solidly, and I only need to sleep like this for one night. My lord...you, don't you agree? "

"Who said I won't." Guan Junchen immediately denied it.

But then his face was cloudy and cloudy, and he was silent for a long time, and finally he lay down beside Yan Chunxi, holding his last hope, and whispered in the young man's ear, "Baby, can't you really do it? Come on, I really miss you...you don't miss me at all? Let's try again, shall we?"

Yan Chunxi naturally heard it.

But he didn't respond, he just turned around and put his arms around Guan Junchen's neck, buried his face in the man's broad chest, and quietly closed his eyes, as if he was about to fall asleep.

Guan Junchen helplessly reached out and hugged the boy.

He also felt a little bitter in his heart, this little thing didn't know whether it was true or not, and at this moment he threw himself into his arms and wanted to fall asleep, but his mind was full of that matter—how could he I can sleep well, isn't this excruciating?

But even though it was said that Yan Chunxi was torturing people, Guan Junchen was a little flattered.

Yan Chunxi would wrap his arms around his neck like before and make such an intimate gesture. Just because of this alone, even if he couldn't take it anymore, he would have to grit his teeth.

When this idea came to his mind, a wry smile suddenly appeared on the corner of Guan Junchen's mouth. He lowered his head, kissed Yan Chunxi's thin earlobe, and said in a hoarse voice, "Oh, my little baby, go to sleep—I'll hug you looking at you."

He's probably a bit of a dick.

While speaking, Guan Junchen couldn't help scolding himself severely in his heart.

I don't know how long it took, but Yan Chunxi was lying in Guan Junchen's arms. He closed his eyes and asked softly, "I just...did I bite you?"

Guan Junchen froze for a moment, then gently stroked the boy's hair: "It doesn't hurt."

He was silent for a while, then his voice suddenly became low: "Xi'er, what about you—"

"That time you bit your own tongue, did it hurt?"

In fact, it was ridiculous to say that he seldom thought about it.

But when Yan Chunxi bit the tip of his tongue just now, his face turned blue from the pain. Then he suddenly remembered that Yan Chunxi had bitten his tongue to bleed for him, and passed out from the pain. Porridge can not be swallowed well.

But at that time, he never really asked "Does it hurt?"

"I," this belated inquiry made Yan Chunxi's body tremble slightly, he seemed to have thought of something, the black eyelashes covering his eyelids were trembling, and it took a long time before he finally answered in a low voice: "At that time, I painful……"

"Stupid boy." Guan Junchen felt a dull pain in his heart, and in this quiet autumn night, he suddenly had the mood to ask about what happened at that time: "At that time...was it because you didn't want to give your body to others? "

Yan Chunxi was silent for a long time, and when Guan Junchen thought he would not answer, the young man slowly spoke dryly: "My lord, maybe, maybe in your eyes before, I, I was just a Mr. Heyuan. I should hand over my body and my life to you. But in fact... Before I was convicted, I was still the young master of the Yan family, and my parents also raised me as a man in the world. 14 When I was [-] years old, my parents wanted to pick a housemate for me, but because I had no interest at all, and even resisted, so they gave up, but I never had the idea of ​​keeping the chastity in my mind."

"After entering the mansion, I did, did that thing... At that time, although I was addicted to lust and entangled me a few times to talk about comfort, but no matter how guard Xiao wanted to be really happy with me at that time, I would No. It’s not because of chastity, it’s just that in my heart, I always, always can’t commit myself to someone who doesn’t have much affection.”

When he said this, he twitched his shoulders slightly in embarrassment, and his voice couldn't help being blocked.

Guan Junchen gently stroked the boy's face with his fingertips, signaling that he was listening.

In fact, he and Yan Chunxi seldom talked about those things in such detail. Years ago when he learned that the twelve sons of Heyuan had stolen someone, he was furious at that time, not only because he was refuted for the first time, but also because the emperor stood up for him. Renamed and barely suppressed gloom.

He beat Yan Chunxi so hard that he was half dead, and almost gave him a red crest, which made his back break out in cold sweat just thinking about it.

Now when I hear about that incident again, the matter of saving face is the second priority, but I feel a little dull pain in my heart.

But at the same time, he suddenly wanted to know what the young man was thinking at that time.

Yan Chunxi paused, thought for a while before continuing: "I was almost beaten to death by you. At that time, I knew I was wrong, but besides feeling sorry for you, I felt sorry for you. I live by myself. I admired you so much when I was young, and now you are so close, but because I have been lonely for a long time, I couldn't hold back when it was over. I am so ashamed and embarrassing... I really can't feel sorry for myself I actually felt uncomfortable because of the affection. But at that time, you were as far away as the moon in the water, until you hugged me... At that time, at that time, it seemed that I had an earth-shaking change overnight. "

"What change...?" Guan Junchen couldn't help asking.

"I, actually, I can't tell the truth, but only with you...I think my love and desire are finally kneaded together, and they can't be separated anymore. No one else can do it, only you, you hug me At that time, I didn't hesitate or resist."

As Yan Chunxi said, he finally raised his head, his eyes shimmered, he looked at Guan Junchen ecstatically, but it seemed as if he was looking at a sweet moment in a certain memory: "Only you..."

His memories seemed to stop abruptly at a certain place, and suddenly there was a look of pain in his eyes, and he murmured: "You, you are the prince, you have never been treated like that, you must not know That kind of feeling. But, but I know that when the body is opened and entered into such a deep place, the joy or pain depends on the mood of others and cannot be controlled by myself. It feels like a hedgehog being Turning it over, I have to show the soft flesh of my belly to others... If the person who does that is not someone who admires and trusts with all his heart, how terrible it would be..."

"Actually, when I was sent away by you, I didn't immediately think of biting my tongue, but when I was imprisoned there waiting for King Pingnan, I felt that I couldn't do it. I thought of being stripped naked by others, and even wanted to remove my internal organs. All my viscera vomited out. I couldn’t serve King Pingnan, no matter what—even though I didn’t want to die at that time, I, I really had nowhere to go.”

When Yan Chunxi said this, he smiled sadly on his face: "Do you think I'm ridiculous? I obviously did that scandal before, but when I came to King Pingnan, I became more energetic. Actually At that time, you thought I was dirty... To this day, I still can't help but think, did you think I was dirty at that time, so you could just give it away?"

"I'm not, I don't think you're dirty..."

Guan Junchen didn't stammer for a moment.

It's really hard for him to explain many things, but at that time, he did care about it at a certain moment.

Some of his habitual thinking made him regard that little thing as an object at that time, so if it was touched by someone, it would be dirty.

He couldn't deny that it had been a dirty thought.

But in Yan Chunxi's clear heart, he never regarded himself as a pampered child prostitute of Heyuan.

Therefore, the loyalty of a young man is only willing to offer it together when his love and desire are completely handed over to him.

He didn't really understand until today.

"Actually, I really don't want to be endlessly entangled in the past, I don't want to be resentful, I don't want to resist you, but I can't—"

Yan Chunxi lowered his head slightly, he bit his lips in pain, and said in a low voice: "I can no longer trust you like I used to, and I can no longer show you the soft flesh of my belly. I still suddenly get scared of you from time to time, I am afraid that you will hurt me. So I dare not, I still think...I want to wait until I grow up, be stronger, and understand you better, maybe I can be with you..."

Yan Chunxi didn't say any more, and Guan Junchen didn't urge him either.

He just hugged Yan Chunxi silently.

It was on this autumn night that they were so close to each other for the first time.

So close, as if the heartbeats are stuck together.

"I won't force you."

Guan Junchen held Yan Chunxi in his arms and said hoarsely, "I'll wait for you."