Journey to the Stars

Yan Hai, this person who is so cold in his bones, has formed an indissoluble bond with Xing Yi when he was in elementary school.

They study in the same school, except that Yan Hai is a grade higher than him, and he likes to hang out with some bad students.At that time, he was still often bullied by a group of male classmates in the class, who spread rumors about his family in private, secretly tore up his textbooks, and ostracized him in public.Once, when Xingyi participated in a school performance, he didn't even sing. The male students sitting in the first row under the stage covered their mouths and whispered. Their faces were full of disdain, and some even gave thumbs up gestures.He looked around the stage, but he couldn't find the light shining on him, the light that could give strength.Inadvertently let go of the hand, and the microphone fell to the ground in an instant, making an unusually harsh sound.He ran away and never signed up for any performances at the school.

Yan Hai was also there at the time, but the two hadn't had any interaction.

Until one night, when Xingyi went to the street to buy daily necessities, he met Yan Hai who was too drunk to take care of himself, throwing up while leaning on the wall.He was quite surprised that such a young man was drunk on the street, and he couldn't answer when he asked where he lived.It's too dangerous to be outside at such a late hour, the only option is to take him back to his residence and wait until he sobers up.It didn't matter that my father didn't come home all night again, after all, he was very experienced in taking care of alcoholics.During this period, Yan Hai's mobile phone rang. At that time, everyone was still using Nokia-based semi-smart phones. There were no apps and functions such as video and voice, and most of them sent MMS.As soon as the other party said that she was Yan Hai's mother, Xingyi tactfully lied that the two of them finished the remedial class late and planned to stay overnight at his home.It took a long time for his mother to fully believe it, and stopped asking questions.

Yan Hai woke up the next morning and asked where is this place?

"Another family." Xingyi replied.

"Your name is someone else?" Yan Hai asked back.

"It doesn't matter who I am, anyway, I'm not like the kind of person who doesn't come home at night." It's really kind of a donkey's liver and lungs, and the tone knew that he would throw him on the side of the road and ignore him.

"What do you want in return, tell me!" Yan Hai changed the subject.

"I don't need it!" Xing Yi said without thinking.

"You have to say one! I don't like to owe favors." Yan Hai insisted on telling him.

"Whatever you want." Xingyi replied.

As a result, when school was over in the afternoon, those male students in Xingyi's class who often bullied him snatched his schoolbag, threw him around for fun, and pushed him to the ground.Xing Yi chased all the way to the school gate, and found that Yan Hai was chatting with some bad students at the school gate.Seeing this situation, Yan Hai stepped forward and punched the male classmate who had snatched his schoolbag in the face, and the others stopped immediately in fear.They watched with trepidation as Yan Hai grabbed the schoolbag with one hand and put it on his shoulder, and helped Xingyi up with the other, and put his arm on Xingyi's shoulder and said, "Let's go back together."

After walking away, Xingyi reluctantly shook off the opponent's hand, and still said: "Thank you".

"Why don't you fight back? If you deal with the wicked, you will be able to control the evil."

"That's your way..."

"Stand up if it's your battle, and leave it up to God to win or not!" After Yan Hai finished speaking, he drew a big hood with both hands out of thin air, which could fit Xingyi into it. "Don't let people think that you are like a five-element deficiency... a mask."

"Boring." Who's out of cover?

"I, Yan Hai, said that I don't like to owe favors." He also didn't like to repeat a sentence over and over again.

"Okay, then there is nothing in arrears between us." Xingyi turned to leave.

"Stop." Yan Hai stopped him again, "I won the best performance award in the last cultural performance."

"Oh, so what?" Xing Yi didn't turn his head, and asked from where he stood.

"Everyone else was singing some shitty cheesy songs on the street, only you chose the Carpenters classic nostalgia 'Yesterdayoncemore' (Yesterday once more) and you had a pretty good voice. Expected you to have Brilliant performance, who knows..."

"Laugh if you want to laugh!"

"Do you dare to go with me now?"

"where?"

In fact, Yan Hai soon found out that Xingyi's family had gone bankrupt, owed debts and divorced his parents two years ago, and he guessed that it was probably because of this that Xingyi's personality did not like to interact with others.On the way, Yan Hai said to him: "You are so inferior, can someone like you be on stage?"

Xingyi followed Yan Hai to Band Village, and it was the first time he learned that there was such an underground tribe that "little hides in the wild, but hides in the city".A musician just ended a song, Yan Hai immediately took the microphone, raised the corner of his mouth slightly and asked in a questioning tone, dare you?

The silent Xingyi frowned, then grabbed the microphone tightly.

After this battle, the two often go to the band village to practice playing or share their understanding of music. No matter what style of music it is, as long as they get together, they can talk about everything.

They also have a beloved band - Mr. Fate!Watched the farewell tour together before the band disbanded!

When I was young

(when I was a kid)

I'd listen to other radio

(like listening to the radio)

Waiting form my favorite songs

(waiting for my favorite song)

When they played I'd sing along

(I sing along alone when they play)

It made me smile

(this makes me smile)

Those were such happy times

(What a happy time those were)

And not so longago

(It feels like not long ago)

How I wondered where they'd gone

(How I wonder where they all went)

But they're back again

(but they come back again)

Just like a long lost friend

(Like an old friend you haven't seen for a long time)

All the songs I love so well

(All the songs I still love so much)

Everysha-la-la-la

(every sha-la-la-la)

Everywo-o-wo-o

(every wo-o-wo-o)

still shines

(still sparkling)

Everything-a-ling-a-ling

(each shing-a-ling-a-ling)

That they're restarting to

(Every melody they start singing)

so fine

(so sweet)

When they get to the part

(when they sing about him)

Where he's breaking her heart

(what makes her sad)

It can really make me cry

(I will cry too)

Just like before

(as before)

It'syesterdayoncemore

(reproduced yesterday)

Shoobiedolanglang

(extremely melancholy)

Shoobiedolanglang

(extremely melancholy)

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Time flies to the third year of high school, and Xingyi has also changed from a frivolous youth in fresh clothes and angry horses to facing the overwhelming competition for entering a higher school.As the only key high school in the small town, there are one test every three days and one test every week.Everyone is trained to be an exam machine, and when the paper is folded in half, they hold their breath and write quickly.

However, what Xingyi does the most is to stare blankly at the dense night sky and think about the future.

What my mother said before she left is still in my ears. Later, he sorted out all the tapes, music theory books, handwritten lyrics books, etc., and threw them into the storage room along with a bunch of musical instruments. In order to facilitate review and exam preparation, he also moved to the school this year according to the arrangement. Boarding; no longer going to that remote path to watch the train pass by, no longer going to Band Village, and gradually not contacting Yan Hai.

Time is like chewing a long and boring black-and-white film, and the screen is shown frame by frame.On the day of the end of the college entrance examination, the examinees burst out like amnesty.Xingyi raised his head and tried to smell the smell in the air, as if the blood was flowing freshly at this moment.

Instead of tearing up the test papers like most people, or having a carnival with his closest confidantes, he chose a hair salon alone, permed his hair into fluffy and curly waves, and used pomade to smooth out the smooth texture. Grab it upwards, and the literature and art are a little wild.This is like a solemn and formal farewell - a complete farewell to the "savage" in front of the mirror who devoted himself to the college entrance examination for a year and led to slovenliness.

At the moment of sending the query text message, the finger pressing the keyboard still trembled involuntarily.

The grades were in line with expectations, and then I went to colleges and universities to fill in the majors and wait anxiously for admission, and finally got admitted to an upper-middle-level undergraduate university in Shanghai as I wished.

Father only came back once during the holidays, and he was still full of travel and dust.

The cordial greetings were choking on his throat, and his father was a little surprised by his new hairstyle, but he didn't comment too much.During dinner, my father poured wine for himself.Xingyi wanted to dissuade him, but his father waved his hand and said that in fact, he had quit drinking for a long time, and only drank two more glasses because he hadn't encountered any particularly memorable days for many years.He is a failure, a failure in his career, a failure in his family, and a failure in life.For such a clumsy and rigid person, fortunately he gave birth to a well-behaved and sensible son, so he didn't need to worry too much.

Xingyi didn't respond, but just looked at his father, wanting to take a few more glances, for fear that his impression of him would become more and more blurred.Xing Yi also pays special attention to the silver strands added to his father's temples. He has aged a lot these years, both physically and mentally.

As expected, my father left again after a day.All that was left was a letter and a savings card.The letter explained that since the family's debts were paid off, he worked part-time every year and gradually saved some money. The card has already remitted a sum of money, which can barely cover half a year's living expenses after deducting the school fees.

Hamlet, translated into Chinese as Hamlet.

Xingyi has never been to this bar managed by Yan Hai.Recalling that I haven't contacted this friend for a long time, I can't help but feel guilty.Yan Hai said on the phone that it doesn't matter, come and sit down when you have time, today is my 19th birthday.

Xing Yi wanted to describe Yan Hai's behavior as secretive.

Yan Hai dropped out of school very early, and has always had a close relationship with the gangster Wei Qi in the small town. A few days after receiving his ID card, Wei Qi handed over the responsibility of the bar to him.I don't know much about other details, and I don't want to ask, for fear of destroying this unique friendship.

The decoration style of Hamlet is quite grand, the entrance and corridor are painted with abstract paintings full of personality, with bold colors and outstanding style.His painting talent is very high, and many of the murals in Band Village are also made by him.I remember that he also mentioned that he was left-handed since he was a child, but it is estimated that if he is switched to a right hand, no one can draw him well.

Xing Yi, a teetotaler, declined all kinds of recommendations from the bartender, and observed the protagonist of the night while drinking.Wearing a brand-name suit, he manages the whole field properly, probably this is a management talent.Occasionally, a drunken quarrel occurred, but he would settle it with a few words and a few words, and his manner was impeccable.The guest wanted to toast, so he leaned forward a little, so gentle and refined, his usual ice face was a completely different person.

Maybe I will never be such a person?

After Yan Hai finished the work at hand, he found that his friend was no longer in the box.The bartender told him that he saw the boy running to the rooftop.

The roof of the bar is full of vines, and there is a particularly high open space. There are still many remaining seats for four or five people to sit on at the same time. They can drink and chat together and overlook the large night view around them.

At this time, Xingyi stretched one foot comfortably, arched the other foot to support his elbow, and with his handsome face facing the wind, he hummed a song that Yan Hai had never heard before.

If you want to describe Yan Hai's singing voice, it is probably like strong wine with ice cubes, all the fiery energy is covered in a thin layer of crushed ice, the entrance is refreshing and refreshing, and it will crush the internal organs in an instant, intoxicated In the soul obsession, he experienced the direct collision of ice and fire, and finally fell into sinking.

Xingyi's voice is different, his voice is ethereal and clear, but at the same time soft and magnetic, it is a complex mixture.His music is the same as his personality. When he first came into contact with it, he didn’t show mountains or dews. Until a moment, he found that his singing was like ink, outlining thousands of hills and valleys, and still water flowing deep. With the dirt on the heart.It is also like bitter tea with various spices boiled over a low fire. It is fragrant when you smell it, but astringent when you take it, and it will work afterward. It is a unique and unforgettable taste.

This is an uninhabited trip

……

This is an unknown wandering

……

along the endless barrenness

……

Walk through a layer of heaven and lose a direction

……

After a few intermittent sentences, he stopped.

"Why don't you sing?" Yan Hai walked on his long legs and jumped up lightly, adding, "The tune of this song sounds very pleasant!"

"There is only a flash of inspiration, and the rest has not been figured out yet."

Suddenly, Xingyi picked up the electric guitar beside him and presented it to the other party.Yan Hai opened the guitar bag, and the ocher red that greeted his eyes was like a flame in the dark night, dazzling.

"I haven't had time to pay back the one that smashed you before, not to mention I can't think of any birthday present..." Seeing Yan Hai's hesitant expression, "Or you don't like it?"

"I'll know after trying it!" Yan Hai readily accepted it, and played a powerful melody. The night was so quiet that the pores of his body dilated.He added that he hadn't received a decent gift for a long time, and he hadn't even celebrated a birthday seriously in years.

"You don't celebrate such an important day as your birthday?" Xing Yi thought, what a weirdo!

Yan Hai didn't intend to answer, instead he deliberately messed up Xingyi's curly hair, and even teased others in an unrecognizable tone: "The brat really has you, you disappeared for so long!"

Xingyi told him that he would take the train to Shanghai to study at university tomorrow.

Yan Hai was silent for a moment, then picked up the two glasses of drinks that he had brought.The cocktail was for myself and the other was made only with soda and other fizzy drinks.

"It just so happens that I'm also half a Shanghainese."

"I know." Xingyi took the drink handed over.Yan Hai's father is from Shanghai. After meeting his mother in Xiaocheng, the two chose to settle here.Later, when Yan Hai was six years old, the sensational "8.31 Xinnan Street Case" occurred in Xiaocheng, and his father died unexpectedly.Xingyi only heard so much. The six-year-olds of the two experienced great changes in their families.

"However, I don't have much yearning for Shanghai. When I filled out my university application, I just wanted to choose a place far enough away." And Yan Hai also said that Shanghai has its own unique style, just go and have a look.

"Speaking of which, I haven't left the small town for many years, and I want to go back for a walk."

Haven't left the small town for so many years?What a mysterious man.

"Then I'll wait for you in Shanghai."

"I have no chance to go to college in my life. What about you, what do you want to do most in college?"

"I want to...I want to play music...if I get the chance."

"What is 'if there is a chance'? Is there anything we can't do? No matter how much time and price it takes!"

"Why pretend to be deep, you are only one or two years older than me."

"One year old is enough vicissitudes."

"..."

"Don't you feel lonely all these years alone?"

Yan Hai remembered that the two had known each other for so long, and it seemed that they hadn't talked much about things other than music.

As if a whole century had passed without words, Xingyi's eyes were filled with pluckable stars, and he said flatly, "Do you know how many galaxies there are in the universe?"

Yan Hai shook his head.

Xingyi continued: "Scientists say that the number of galaxies observed so far has exceeded two trillion, but the distance between those countless stars is calculated in light years, which is even shorter than the distance between humans and the stars." Be far away!

When I was young, every time my parents quarreled so fiercely, I was really afraid that they would torture each other to death, and at the same time, I was so powerless.Until they choose to divorce, I can finally calm down, but I also know that there is no one to rely on.I am separated from the people and things in the small town by a long, long distance, as if by the Milky Way.The only medium that connects me with here seems to be music.

It’s just that sometimes I think, if even the music fails, how long will such a person live?

What is even more frightening is that when I leave this world forever, no one remembers that I have been here...Then why am I born...and where should I go to find the answer...Maybe this is my loneliness... "

Yan Hai lit a cigarette and listened quietly to what he said without interrupting.The smoke ring blows with the wind to an invisible distance, flicking the cigarette butt with your fingers, only to see the fire point of the smoke powder falling from a height to the downstairs, and gradually disappearing in the process...

"Then work hard to pass on your story and music to everyone!" Yan Hai put his hand on Xingyi's shoulder, tightly, as if infinite power was sent to him. "And no matter what, at least you won't have only one person in your future. From today on, I will be your elder brother. About you, even if it is loneliness, I will share half of it!"

"elder brother?"

"Maybe... we are all the same people in our bones."

"yes?"

The two of them raised their heads and poured down the drink in their hands at the same time, the slightly astringent taste swirled on the tip of their tongues.

"Since they are two brothers, next time we meet, we must not get drunk and go home!"

"Who's afraid of whom?"

"Stop talking nonsense, being a brother has this life or the next life!"

"cheers!"

️

Looking at the express train with no end in sight, Xing Yi realizes that he has already stood at a new turning point in his growth.

The train station was full of people, some hurried, and some waved goodbye.Before the ticket check, Xingyi checked the luggage repeatedly, and even took out a small note from his trouser pocket, which had a residential address in Shanghai written on it.There is no need to guess that my brother secretly stuffed it in last night, and he added that the suite was his father's old residence, and he could live in it anytime.After a while, when he finishes handling his affairs, he will also return to Shanghai.

Sleeping on the rumbling train heading straight into the distance, and looking at the wilderness rapidly retreating from behind, the past is once again clearly outlined in front of my eyes.

Life is a long journey.

But the past will eventually pass, and all you can see is the future.

I really want to experience university!

I really want to make new friends!

I really want to see a wider world!

I really want to move towards my dream step by step!

I really hope that one day, I can break free from all shackles, take a non-stop train, and then start a new journey in life...