A pair of boring male deskmates

I found myself getting more and more weird.Concentrating on me has become more laborious than usual.I often read a book for 3 minutes, and wander for 5 minutes, knowing that it is wrong to do so, and there is no way to control it.Our school has the habit of singing every afternoon before class, and the melody of the song that day will be replayed in my mind over and over again, which interferes with my study state.

But how should I tell others?Say my brain can sing?Who will listen to me?I was helpless, and I was so anxious that the weather was getting hotter. Every time I did a question, I would sweat a lot.

It is too painful to fight with your own thinking.

I have no choice but to use my physical pain to cover it up since I have no way to control it psychologically.I habitually took the ballpoint pen and stabbed it into my hand, once, once, heavily.It made my hands full of red, red, blue and blue ballpoint pen marks, and deep pits.My deskmate was shocked when he saw my actions, and asked me, "What's the matter with you?"

I yelled back angrily: "It's okay! Don't worry about it!"

What I don't want to say, no one can pry it out of my mouth.Lin Fen has been with me for so long, so I still know a little bit about my temper.Ba looked at it a few times, opened his mouth, and finally remained silent.Leaving me alone to do papers more irritably.Why not this question?Why not this question?Why not this question!

I speak less and less.I wishful thinking that the decline in grades may be related to my too much nonsense, it may be that my rest time is too long, my entertainment time is too much, and my mind is not on study, which caused this series of problems. question.It is because I have been exposed to too many external stimuli that I can't control my mind when doing the questions.I want to close myself up, don't worry too much, don't talk too much with them, and devote all my energy to studying.

What happened around me, big and small, was basically blocked by me.So when Lin Fen told me that something was wrong with Tian Shuyuan recently, he was nestled all day long and kept silent in the dormitory, I didn't care.What other people's affairs have nothing to do with me, Tian Shuyuan can do whatever he likes.I tidied up the papers carelessly, without even glancing at Lin Fen: "It doesn't matter, you don't need to tell me about this kind of thing in the future."

Facing the worsening attitude, Lin Fen was a little impatient.He clacked the bottle on the table.I pretended I couldn't hear, I didn't bother to deal with him for such a trivial matter.Time is precious, so I took out my papers, buried my head and worked hard.

I thought it was just the pressure ambassador's petty temper, but I didn't expect Tian Shuyuan's situation to get worse and worse.In the end, I had no choice but to go out and check, but I never came back after the check.Well, a big living person just disappeared. I looked at the empty bed in his dormitory, and I was somewhat grateful.

At the class meeting that day, Hao Zijian revealed Tian Shuyuan's condition nonchalantly: "Students should not only pay attention to their studies, but also learn to relax themselves. Our class Tian Shuyuan has suffered from depression and has already suspended school and returned home. Everyone must pay attention ah!"

Depression.I didn't expect the problem to be so serious.We lack basic medical knowledge, and we don’t have access to popular science about depression. Most of our understanding of this type of disease comes from dramas and TV dramas.I thought this kind of disease was far away from us, but I didn't expect it to be closer than I imagined.

This holiday, when I got home, I turned on my computer to log in to QQ, and found the chat interface of Hetian Shuyuan.Leave him a message: Do you still owe me a favor, remember?

I'm referring to the time when I went up to take the blame in the dormitory.

I continued typing: You said that if I need your help with anything, remember to contact you.Now I can beg you, I hope you can live a good life, can you?

Looking at the gray head on the opposite side, I felt a throbbing pain somewhere in my heart.After so many days of performance, I think Tian Shuyuan and I may be in the same category.But I didn't have the courage to see it, and I didn't want to believe that I would have this weak disease, so I kept procrastinating and ignoring it.

It wasn't until the summer vacation after the college entrance examination that I went for a checkup that I found out that I also had depression.Lin Fen said he would always be with me.

The author has something to say: it's unfinished...