roommate

Ding Jing:

Sorry, I can't type Chinese, I can only write by hand, it may be difficult to understand, but I hope you can read this letter.

Let me talk about myself first.

Do you remember the story I told you about the man who nearly died of heat?

In fact, I was the man who almost died of heat, but, unlike the story, in reality, another man really died in the desert.

The other man was my partner, who traveled with me across the desert because he trusted my judgment.Then, he never got out of that place again.

From then on, I developed a morbid hatred of blind risk taking.

At the same time, I left my original working environment and jumped to a security company.

As a bodyguard, I soon received a task, that task was to escort a son of a rich family into the most dangerous no-man's land of the Yarlung Zangbo Grand Canyon.I don't care about the reason why the young master wants to enter the Grand Canyon - when I crossed the desert, I thought it was to save the world - for me, the young master who is pampered and pampered is too arrogant and ignorant, I don't know what nature has How dangerous, because I have money, and I found three people to accompany him on this meaningless adventure, so I turned the guilt and remorse for my partner deep in my body into hostility and contempt for that young master .

I just regard him as the delicate "Miss" who can't bear hardships. When he let the boat dock to rest, I let him go home early. When he eats very little, I ridicule him for not being used to coarse grains... ...But, he has more fighting spirit than I thought.

In many difficult situations, he was the first to carry them through without frowning.When I sneer, he will also fight back with particularly powerful practical actions.He hires us to work for him, but actually treats us as his team members, giving orders every time he acts like the captain, and is always responsible for our safety thinking.

That day I just accidentally cut my arm with a stone. The wound was so small that I didn't even bother to deal with it. He suddenly came over with a roll of bandages during dinner and warned me with a straight face not to turn a small injury into a big one because of the wound infection.I took the bandage and wrapped it around twice as a perfunctory act, but he ridiculed my ability to deal with the wound. After that, he took the bandage and helped me re-dress the wound without any explanation.

... I don't know when I changed my mind about him.The first time I noticed it was because of the poisonous insect that didn't know how to crawl on him.

When I saw that poisonous insect, I was very scared.

If the poisonous bug was on my body, even crawling up my nose, I wouldn't be so afraid.However, the poisonous insect was on him.

At that time, I didn't have time to think, so I instinctively reached out and slapped the bug away.Because of fear, I worked hard.

That's when I finally knew that he was very important to me.

And it wasn't until seven months later that I knew another thing: because I was afraid that something would happen to him, I slapped him hard, and my fear was regarded by him as my dislike for him.

——So, when I entered the Grand Canyon for the second time, I never dared to take pictures of him again.

Go back to seven months ago.

On the day the accident happened, he and I slid down the cliff together.

We had a chance to be rescued.At that time, we grabbed a branch of a tree that grew horizontally.He first climbed along the branch to a stone that could barely stand, but I fell down because of a miss.

What follows is my speculation—because you want to know what happened, so I'll answer as best I can.

But I think that's the truth: like I said, you've climbed to that little rock, you could have been saved, and most importantly, you shouldn't have fallen to a platform that's far away.The reason why you were finally found there by the search and rescue team, I believe, is because you were not there waiting for rescue.Seeing me fall, you know that there is no way to climb down, but in order to find your team members who fell off the cliff, you still know that you can't do it.You climbed down looking for a path that didn't exist, and finally, because of the loss of energy, you fell down.

Fortunately, in the end you and I both escaped death.

At that time, I was rescued by Uncle Lausanne.Unexpectedly, seven months later, he saved my life again.

After I was finally able to move freely, I came to S City.

To be honest, I didn't think about seeing you at that time, I just wanted to take a look at you from a distance to make sure you were safe and sound, but I didn't expect that I would immediately know that you were not "safe and sound".

I also studied some psychology... well, that's an excuse.It's not because I think I must be better than the real Dr. Duzhong, and can treat your split personality symptoms, so I pretend to be him.I did that just because I wanted to be by your side.

I know you're mad at me for lying.However, this is the only way I can think of.

Our relationship has not been very good. I am afraid that if I come here as myself, I will be turned away by you.And if I were Eucommia, I could even live in your apartment.

I want to know what it's like to live with you.I guess, this at least eases my missing of you.

What I didn't expect was that it would be so sweet to contact you as "Dr. Du", but also so difficult.

When I was in the Grand Canyon, I was curious—because I was always paying attention to you subconsciously, so I even noticed the number of times you went to the bathroom—I had to wonder why you went to the bathroom so rarely, yes Not doing something somewhere I don't know.When playing Eucommia, I couldn't help asking this question.

You told me that in order to reduce the number of times you go to the toilet and avoid delays in your trip, you try to drink as little water as possible and eat less.

Only then did I realize that when you were so dedicated to the actions of our team, I thought you were not used to eating coarse grains, and it was just a hot flash for you to eat too little.

I was shocked when I learned that your second personality was me.

How could that person be me?

When he reappeared, I carefully observed your second personality, that indifferent, ruthless man.

It's not actually me.My personality is very ordinary, just ordinary easygoing.I don't like making friends with people, but I can chat with anyone—this real me is also different from the me in front of you later.When in front of you, I always unconsciously want to make you happy, unknowingly become cheeky and childish.

And obviously, this real me is also completely different from the Grand Canyon me.

When I think of the Grand Canyon, the me who appeared in your eyes and in your heart did not give me a trace of tenderness. When I think of him being indifferent and inhuman to you all the time, I want to beat up the me at that time.

After arriving at the Grand Canyon, your second personality reappears.

Remember when I said, I don't want to tell you that sentence?The sentence that your second personality asked me to pass on to you.

If that person is not you, I really want to punch him.This is something I've been thinking about for a long time.

Because he actually asked me to tell you that when he gets to that cliff, he will do to you what you did to him.

——So, Song Tiancheng in your heart will blame you for his accident just because you want to enter the Grand Canyon.

But that's not the case at all.

I would never have thought that way.Even if I wasn't revived at the time, and I really died there, being hired by your parents to accompany you into the Grand Canyon is still the best thing that happened to me in this life.

But I can't blame you for misunderstanding me.Because it's me who paints the me in your heart so cold and unreasonable.

It's not that I haven't thought about confessing to you, but time and time again, from you, I know what a man Song Tiancheng is, which makes me really want to be Eucommia for the rest of my life.

I am particularly afraid of being exposed by you, because after you tear off my mask, you will see the man you hate and should be hated by you.

So at that time, I was still thinking about how to make you change your plan and not take me to see Papa Basang.

Basang Ram recognized the face of "Eucommia", and I used this face to meet him before.If recognized by him, you must immediately guess the whole truth.

Unexpectedly, I haven't figured out a way yet, you met your brother first.

Afterwards, you cried in my arms.

If you knew who I am, you wouldn't do that.

If you know who I am, when you want a comforting hug, I don't know if anyone else can provide it.

At that moment, I really wanted to be Eucommia for the rest of my life.I even started to conceive an action plan to achieve this goal, and I already thought of how to lure Eucommia immigrants.

If it wasn't for proving to you that Song Tiancheng is not dead, I wouldn't take off the mask.

However, when I took off the mask and you turned and left, I finally knew what you can't accept the most.

Of course I can't compare with your brother, so you won't cry for me.However, just seeing your sad eyes, I can't help but regret it.

I shouldn't lie to you, hide from you, for that, no matter how sincere I am, it's a deception.

You are right, I am such an insincere man.I was afraid of being hated by you, so I pretended to be someone else until I forgot my true colors.

Now, I decided to correct it.

That's why I've written everything I need to tell you in my letter.

Now, there is one last thing left, let me tell you here.

See here if you can bear it.

I hope you haven't torn up this letter.Otherwise, I may have to spend another two full days looking up the dictionary and rewriting these difficult Chinese characters.

Finally, what I want to tell you is what I really think.

——I want you to be happy, I want you to laugh every day, I want you to feel happy.I want you never to be hurt again.

If I can't do anything, I try to pray about it too.

If only I could do it more effectively...

Are you still willing to give me this chance to do it?

love you

Song Tiancheng