Dear People·Hua Chen

The cemetery, which is silent during the day, is even more silent at night.

The light and shadow are weird, and almost no one will visit the grave at this time.

Xiao Linzi put the white lily that Shu just bought in front of her mother's spiritual tablet, and gently stroked her photo frame with her hand and asked, "Mom, do you miss me?"

Of course, there can never be an answer.

"I have a good life in the United States. I am going to study for a Ph. D., are you happy?" Lin Yilin curled his lips: "Really, life is very relaxed and comfortable there, the teachers and classmates are very kind, and Chen Lu and his mother , I also think about me, that is, many times, I will miss you without warning, and I miss you until my heart hurts. Mom, I really want you to live a good life, live in a big house, play the piano , raise flowers, have no worries about food and clothing, no longer be looked down upon by others, and no longer have money, but you don't give me this opportunity, I have the ability, but you are long gone."

He is a very strong person, no amount of difficulties can knock him down.

But every time he was in front of his mother, he was still as fragile as a child.

Lin Yilin was talking, tears fell down, he held the posthumous photo and closed his eyes in pain, feeling that he was trembling with breathing.

Could it be that owning Chen Lu will consume all other luck in life, and that's why I lost everything when I was young?

On the other side of the ocean, when he was happy, extravagant, and enjoying glory and love, he would always think of his mother's poor appearance, who was reluctant to buy a new dress for ten years in order to save himself.

Lin Yilin cried and cried, picked up a huge paper bag at his feet, took out the satin-wrapped Chanel dress inside, dragged it in front of the portrait and asked: "Mom, do you like it? I think you will look good in it." .”

Tears dripped on the peach-pink silk fabric, leaving dark scars.

Lin Yilin lowered his head and tried his best to calm down his excited and painful mood. Thousands of words were turned into silence in the night wind.

He didn't know how long he stood there in a daze before he repacked the skirt and put it on the ground, took out a handkerchief and wiped his embarrassed face, preparing to hide back to the hotel without a trace.

After all, all the sadness will cause people to worry.

Unexpectedly, the moment he turned around, Xiao Linzi saw an extremely familiar figure.

Chen Lu waited quietly not far away, his blue eyes were extraordinarily bright in the darkness.

Lin Yilin lowered his head in embarrassment: "How do you know I'm here? When did you come?"

"I called the hotel manager and told him to tell me when you go back, but you didn't go back. I searched for you around Beijing for a while, and thought you had nowhere else to go, so I came here." Chen Lu walked in hesitantly, touched his red eyes from crying: "Don't be sad, my heart hurts."

"I'm sorry." Lin Yilin was really sorry that she deliberately concealed from him today.

Chen Lu hugged him: "I was negligent. Every time I took you to visit the grave, I forgot that you would have something to say to mom alone."

Lin Yilin chuckled with a choked voice: "I have to say bad things about you."

Regarding the loss of his mother, Chen Lu didn't know how to comfort him, as if the usual sweet words were useless.

Because death is not an instant thing, when a person dies, the living person will always be immersed in nostalgia and regret, unable to extricate themselves.

-

The night was getting darker, and no one was disturbing around.

It was rare for the two of them to sit on the steps and chat side by side facing the starry sky like they did when they were young.

"Although it is said that people have to live for themselves, how can they really have so much strength for themselves?" Lin Yilin smiled wryly: "Elementary school, junior high school, high school... I really didn't waste a second, I was studying hard. I want to make money in the future so that my mother can live a prosperous life. I don’t know anything about comics, cartoons, and novels that other children like. Really, even those anime and console games that you and Dewey are discussing all day long I also don’t understand at all, the only pastime I’ve had is the old collection of poems borrowed from the reading library, in fact, living like this is quite boring, if I have a chance in the next life, I want to be a happy ordinary person.”

Of course, Chen Lu would never forget how superficial and cruel he was when he first met Xiao Linzi. He disliked his lack of gorgeous clothes and willful chic, and hated his cautious and deliberately pleasing treatment of others.

It wasn't until later that I gradually saw what kind of soul was in this boy's frail body, that I was attracted, shocked, and conquered step by step.

It's just that time has passed, and those feelings, even if you insist on saying them, you can't find the beginning.

"After my mother passed away, what I was doing seemed to be out of inertia. Everyone once blamed you for not thinking of me and hurting me. In fact, I didn't think clearly for myself. Why did I have to go abroad? Excellent." Lin Yilin lowered his eyes: "It's not that I didn't have feelings for you at that time, it's just..."

He bravely looked at Chen Lu and admitted the past: "It's just subconsciously thinking that you won't like me forever, so I still want to live selfishly and work hard."

Chen Lu loves him, and has gradually understood everything about him. Hearing this, he smiled lightly: "What about now?"

"Now, you are the reason for me to work hard." Lin Yilin said in a low voice: "So, I really didn't insist on gambling before, if one day you don't need my hard work, I will give up without hesitation. "

"That day won't happen." Chen Lu immediately promised.

"Life is impermanent, who knows?" Lin Yilin calmed down a lot and asked, "Is there any smoke?"

Chen Lu searched in the leather jacket.

Lin Yilin glared at him: "Didn't you quit? You actually carry it with you."

Chen Lu fooled with a smile.

Lin Yilin lit himself silently, took a puff quietly, and then rested with his hand holding the cigarette on his forehead and closed his eyes.

In the life that is always rushing forward, it is rare to have no worries at this moment.

The words he said to Chen Lu were even more naked than taking off his clothes in front of him.

Take out your heart, not for the person you love the most, how can you do it.

Chen Lu loyally accompanied him to keep quiet, and only asked when the wind blew, "Is it cold?"

Lin Yilin opened his tear-filled eyes and shook his head.

Chen Lu himself was disobedient, but he didn't want him to hurt his body. He took the cigarette and held his hand again: "It's so cold, why don't you say it's not cold."

Lin Yilin silently leaned into his arms.

"Isn't it boring to fight with these people every time I go back to Beijing?" Chen Lu said, "I'll take you to a special place tomorrow."

"What special place?" Lin Yilin felt that when he was dating, he almost visited all the places he could go, only when he discovered a newly opened leisure place.

Chen Lu continued to smoke the cigarette, and said with a smile, "You will know when the time comes."

-

Many years ago, it took a long time to bump the distance. Because of the high-speed construction and the rapid speed of the car, it took an hour to arrive.

In the early morning of the next day, Lin Yilin stared blankly out the car window at a place that was both familiar and unfamiliar, a place that had only appeared in dreams, with mixed feelings.

Because the young master actually dragged him back to the county town where he grew up.

The originally backward and deserted small place has gradually become tidy and modern with the expansion of the Beijing city circle, economic development and the passage of time.

"Revisit the old place, it's so boring that you can't stay here for an hour." Lin Yilin said embarrassedly.

"It's home." Chen Lu followed the navigation to find the direction while driving: "How can a place with you be boring?"

"Which home, I sold the house long ago." Lin Yilin didn't know how to deal with the past.

"Sold it to me." Chen Lu said smoothly.

Lin Yilin opened his eyes slightly in surprise.

Chen Lu took it for granted: "I can't accept that my wife's bed has been ruined by others."

"Nervous." Xiao Linzi, who was so preoccupied, was so teased that he turned his head to ignore him, and only then did he understand why he had just put the listing on the agency, but was taken over without saying a word.

Chen Lu defended himself: "This is human nature, okay?"

"What else have you done behind my back?" Lin Yilin asked.

Chen Lu kept silent and immediately changed the subject: "Here we are, let's go and have a look."

Lin Yilin looked at the gate of the community that stayed deep in his memory, and for a moment he was dazed, thinking that he was back to 15 years old.

-

Obviously, His Royal Highness has been asking people to clean the room regularly and maintain furniture and appliances all these years.

While everything is old original, it is spotlessly clean and ready for immediate use.

Xiao Linzi, who had been very quiet since entering the door, walked into the bedroom. It turned out that the murals painted by his father on the wall had been peeled off and mottled.

He pressed the tape recorder beside the bed, and Faye Wong's pure sounds of nature were played amidst the slight noise.

-

Please don't be discouraged, you will be jealous

You look up too high, only yourself belittled

I don't love myself, how can I love each other

How can I benefit my lover

This heavy love letter is like a big tree in front of the door at the end of the night

-

It was clear what I was thinking at that time.

When selling the house, Lin Yilin only longed to get rid of it, and took almost nothing away. Thinking of everything, Chen Lu secretly protected him,

"Do you still remember that I lived here?" The young master leaned against the door which was too low for him and smiled.

"Of course." Lin Yilin turned off the music: "I was almost scared to death by you."

"On the second day of my 16th birthday, I kissed you on this bed that night, and you didn't refuse." Chen Lu vividly remembered the young and cute Xiao Linzi at that time.

It's a pity that Lin Yilin hummed: "My mind is full of such things."

"My mind is full of you, okay?" Chen Lu walked to the edge of the bed and sat down, helped his head and kissed him again.

Lin Yilin still wouldn't refuse, but instead smiled slightly: "Thank you."

"Thank you." Chen Lu raised his eyebrows indifferently.

"Thank you for not giving up on me." Lin Yilin reached out to hug him, and touched the wedding ring on the ring finger of his left hand with his right hand, as if confirming the truth of everything.

"If it's about this, I'm very grateful to myself." Chen Lu smiled and patted him on the back gently: "Stop hiding and crying by yourself, I accept all your life, hello I love all the bad ones, you can tell me anything, okay?"

Lin Yilin nodded, had a moment of tenderness with him, then let go and said, "It's all here, I'm going to buy some food, let's eat here."

"I'll accompany you." Chen Lu was very enthusiastic.

Lin Yilin was afraid of the terrifying energy of being surrounded by countless crowds last time, so he shook his head and refused: "Please forgive me, if the market is not demolished, it will be behind the building, go back as soon as you go, you can rest here."

Chen Lu had no choice but to agree, and waited for him to go out, then he found Xiao Linzi's childhood photo album and lay on the bed to enjoy it happily.