Stay alive

Lin Qiannan turned his face away, the bright moonlight streaming in from the window caught his sight.

"Brother Qiannan, why didn't you speak?"

"Hush," Lin Qiannan said, "Appreciate the moon, the moon is especially full tonight in a year."

"The moon is very round on the fifteenth of every month." Xing Wu didn't have his feelings.

Lin Qiannan poured a glass of wine, sniffed it, it was so sweet, tasted like a glass of white water in his mouth, but his body was really drunk, he smiled and said: "You are right, people like me who have no relatives people, the moon on the fifteenth of every month is no different from this time."

"Actually, I think the moonlight tonight is very beautiful, but it's not as beautiful as brother Qiannan." Xing Wu said lightly, "If brother Qiannan doesn't mind, Xing is willing to reward you instead of looking at the moon."

Xing Wu's appearance of not hiding his affection is like a broken jar.

Lin Qiannan burst out laughing, buried his shoulders on the table and shook his head, raised his glass to invite Xing Wu to drink after laughing enough.

Xing Wu was drinking cup after cup of wine, Lin Qiannan was in high spirits and he was very comfortable reciting poems to the moon, no one knew how warm the relic around his neck was, the warmth penetrated into his slow beating heart It gave him a feeling of "alive".

That's fine too.

Xing Wu saw the cinnabar mole on Lin Qiannan's forehead dimmed a bit, and his eyes flickered.

When they woke up the next day, they went to the capital without any haste. Xing Wu had been infected with the disease for three days, and the red rash on his body became more and more obvious, but his face was smooth and clean—maybe it was covered.

Seeing that Lin Qiannan didn't ask, Xing Wu didn't make up a reason to explain. Apart from stealing his identity, he really didn't want to lie to Lin Qiannan again.

Xing Wu was in good health, and most of his injuries healed in just a few days, but the journey was bumpy. They stopped and stopped for two days and settled in a farmhouse.

The head of the house is a widowed Granny Cao. They happened to meet her alone on the way, and after bringing her home, they were attracted by her enthusiasm.

Granny Cao's old yard is unexpectedly tidy, and she has found out good dishes to entertain them.

"Thank you, mother-in-law." Lin Qiannan said.

Granny Cao sat at the top, and Lin Qiannan and Xing Wu sat at her left and right respectively.

The simple food on the table aroused Xing Wu's appetite. He glanced at Lin Qiannan, said thank you, and raised his chopsticks to eat.

"Are you going to the capital?" Granny Cao smiled kindly on her wrinkled face.

Lin Qiannan was full after two bites, put down his chopsticks and chatted with her: "Well, there are still about seven days' journey to arrive."

"Seven days... can you find someone for me, an old woman? His name is Cao Meng, my son, who was arrested 20 years ago..." Granny Cao covered the back of Lin Qiannan's hand with her rough hands, her expression excited said, "Can you do it?"

"Yes," Lin Qiannan comforted, "Is his name Cao Meng? How does he look like?"

"It looks... Let me think about it..." Granny Cao let go of him, her white silver hair was coiled behind her head, and the two strands of hair that fell covered her lonely and dim eyes. I have forgotten what my son looks like...20 years...or 25 years...my son is very tall...if he hadn't joined the army, he would definitely open a medical clinic."

Xing Wu put down the bowls and chopsticks silently, tidied up the table for Grandma Cao, and then took it to the kitchen.

Lin Qiannan vaguely remembered that there was a battle between Yu State and the Tatars 30 years ago, with heavy casualties. It was precisely because of the war 30 years ago that both countries suffered losses, and the peace that has continued to this day began.

In fact, it is recuperating, and the two countries still regard each other as a thorn in the flesh.

Yu Kingdom and Nan Kingdom are like two separate pieces of beautiful jade. People who hold one half covet the beauty of the other half, so they think about how to get the other half as well to make a rare treasure.

Lin Qiannan didn't know how to tell Granny Cao that 30 years had passed since the war, and he didn't know how to find a soldier who didn't know whether he survived or not.

"My poor son..." Granny Cao thought of the sad place, and two strings of tears flowed from the corners of her eyes, "He was only 15 years old when he went... How could those people arrest him? Why didn't they arrest me... …I only have one son.”

Lin Qiannan lowered his eyes, he didn't feel empathy in his eyes, but he knew in his heart: the country is about to go to war, and it is the common people who suffer.

"Grandma Cao, don't worry, I will find him for you."

Granny Cao shook her head and wiped away the tears from her eyes with her sleeve, she said: "No need, it's because the old man is too strong. Over the years, I have asked many people who are going to the capital, some did not bring back the news, and some pretended not to." I remember, but if there are many people asking, they will naturally know...Cao Meng died in battle a long time ago."

Although Lin Qiannan was prepared, he was shocked when he heard from Grandma Cao, "Maybe there is still a turning point."

After venting her emotions, Granny Cao said with a kind smile: "Cao Meng's death is not considered incomprehensible. I have nothing to complain about, but as a mother, I always miss my own son... Hey... how can there be no complaints? I should complain who?"

Who is to blame?

Granny Cao's questions kept haunting Lin Qiannan.

At night, Lin Qiannan and Xing Wu lived in the same room, one sleeping on the bed and the other sleeping on the floor.

"Is her son's name Cao Meng?" Xing Wu lay on the ground, looking sideways at Lin Qiannan who was thinking.

Lin Qiannan nodded: "Yes."

"I will find out where he is when I return to the capital." Xing Wu wrote down secretly.

"No need, Cao Meng is already dead," Lin Qiannan said, "In 30 years, there has been no bones left. No one will remember a small soldier."

The autumn wind at night made people feel cool, and they were obviously in the house, but they didn't feel half of the cold.

Xing Wudao: "The battlefield is ruthless."

Lin Qiannan wrapped up the quilt tightly, sat on the bed and said, "Why is there a war?"

"I don't know," Xing Wu sat up, "When the critical point is reached, for the sake of the country and the people, war is unavoidable, just like you are under the same roof as your enemy, if you don't want to harm him, he will harm you too. "

Lin Qiannan really wanted to say that Shen Tuxuan couldn't, but when the words came to his lips, he didn't know where to say it. After all, Shen Tuxuan hated Han Qi because of him.

"But if I were a king, I would avoid the battlefield as much as I could," Xing Wu said with an expression very much like Han Qi for a moment.

Lin Qiannan looked at him blankly.

"It's a pity that I'm just an ordinary person." Xing Wu was just Xing Wu again for a moment, "It's better to be free and easy than to have family and country feelings. The burden of Yu country is too heavy for ordinary people like me to bear." He was teasing himself.

Looking at the relaxed Xing Wu, Lin Qiannan finally understood what was going on in his heart.

Xing Wu can die, but Han Qi must not die.

For the sake of the people of the Yu Kingdom, and even more so for the Southern Kingdom, a monarch who has no intention of war is needed.

Han Qi had to live.

Lin Qiannan got out of bed, sat on Xing Wu's lap, hugged his neck and kissed him. Xing Wu's eyes widened, and he pushed him away without thinking.

"What are you doing?" Xing Wu snapped.

"There are still two more days, and I have to help you get rid of the epidemic," Lin Qiannan said with a smile, "Don't you like me? A moment of spring night is worth a thousand gold."

Xing Wu pushed him away, lay on the bed by himself, covered the quilt and turned his back on him, "Brother Qian Nan doesn't want to sleep on the bed, so I'll sleep."

"Han Qi, you can't die." Lin Qiannan said softly.

Xing Wudeng sat up and looked at Lin Qiannan in disbelief.

"I know you're Han Qi, you're not good at disguising, or you never thought of disguising," Lin Qiannan said while sitting on the bed, "Why did you die for me?"

"You... know everything?" Xing Wu said.

"I only know you are Han Qi, and I've seen your portrait." Lin Qiannan touched the finely crafted mask on his face, "Although your mask is well-made, you can still see the flaws if you look closely. Besides, you've been in a coma so many times, and you're as smart as me, so it's hard not to see the clue."

"You know everything?" For Xing Wu, the five-character answer is the most important.

"What do I know?" Lin Qiannan seemed to know nothing.

"five years ago."

"I got seriously ill five years ago and forgot a lot of things. Did I know you when I was in Yu Country?" Lin Qiannan asked curiously.

"I don't know..." Xing Wu breathed a sigh of relief, believing that Lin Qiannan didn't remember him.

Lin Qiannan's acting skills are [-] times better than Xing Wu's, he said: "You are so kind to me, did you know me before?"

"No..." Xing Wu looked at him, "I treat you well because I covet your beauty."

Lin Qiannan: "..."

The two have often bickered these days, Xing Wu can't always beat Lin Qiannan, but his skills have improved a lot.

"Since you are greedy for my beauty, I still say that a spring night is worth a thousand gold." Lin Qiannan snatched half of his bedding.

Xing Wu put his hands behind his ears, trying to scare him by taking off his diapers and revealing his true face, but Lin Qiannan stopped him.

"Brother Qiannan is scared?" Xing Wu said with satisfaction, "Go to sleep, it's late at night."

Lin Qiannan was afraid. He was afraid that if Xing Wu took off his mask, it would not be the unrestrained Xing Wu who was willing to quarrel with him every day, but Han Qi, the gloomy and treacherous Emperor of Yu Kingdom.

"Don't you ask me why I don't panic when I know your identity?" Lin Qiannan asked while sleeping next to him.

Xing Wu turned to him and said, "Because you are Lin Qiannan, the general of the Southern Kingdom, your status is enough not to panic about me, the emperor."

It turned out that both of them knew each other's identity well.

"So why did you save me?" Xing Wu said, "You should expect me to die like the people in the southern country."

"So why did you save me?" Lin Qiannan almost followed the scriptures, "You should expect me to die like the people of Yu Kingdom."

"I don't want you to die."

"Me too."

"I am greedy for the general's beauty."

"Me too."

"I am pleased with you."

"Me too..." Lin Qiannan hastily said "Bah bah" twice, switched sides, and turned his back to him and said, "What are you talking about! Sleep!"

"it is good."

Lin Qiannan opened his eyes, his heart was beating non-stop, he squeezed the corners of the quilt tightly, and raised the corners of his mouth.

In fact, they all have something to hide, but at this moment they are extremely relaxed.Lin Qiannan can tell Xing Wu that he remembers everything except the joys, sorrows and joys of five years ago.

How could he say that he was like a container storing Lin Qiannan's memory?

Is he like that what Xing Wu wants to protect?Why did Lin Qiannan help Han Qi in that way five years ago?

Is it because of feelings?because of love?

What is emotion?Why would you sacrifice yourself and forget yourself?

Would love to experience it once.

For the first time in five years, Lin Qiannan didn't sleep alone.

There is an old friend who used to like lying next to him, who can sleep well?

Old Xianghao slept soundly, breathing evenly, with a pair of big hands on Lin Qiannan's waist obediently, and fell asleep obediently with his arms around him.

Lin Qiannan couldn't turn over and return to the ground, so he just turned his face.

Xing Wu's face was pretty good, and after a long time, he wouldn't think it was thick, but it wasn't as pleasing as Han Qi's face.

Maybe five years ago, he also fell in love with Han Qi because of his beauty?

"Still asleep?" Xing Wu opened his eyes when he was dazed.

Lin Qiannan wanted to turn his back again, but was pulled back by Xing Wu.

"You should sleep on the floor." Lin Qiannan said, "The bed is too small for two people."

"Is it because you can't bear it or dare not face me?" Xing Wu said with a smile.

"Both," Lin Qiannan said honestly, "Do you know why I haven't gotten married in my [-]s? Because I like men, it's dangerous for you to be next to me."

"Oh?" Xing Wu didn't panic at all, "Why is it dangerous?"

"It will be me..." Lin Qiannan quickly approached him.

Xing Wu's head was thrown back, and he hit the wall with a thud, so painful that he hugged his head, Lin Qiannan laughed very appreciatively.

"It's obvious that you have taken a fancy to me, but you don't want to tell the truth," Lin Qiannan said, "If you like me, you should prepare a dowry gift and go to Nanguo to propose marriage. With your status, you are worthy of me. Don't worry, our Nanguo The folk customs are open." Lin Qiannan was not sure if he was joking.

"Brother Qiannan, if you want to personally relieve the epidemic for me because of guilt, then there is no need," Xing Wu rubbed the back of his head and said, "You can arrest anyone, but you can't do it yourself."

"You like me, not others, why can't I?"

"It is because I like you that I save you, and I don't want you to save me."

The two people who came and went thought they were playing charades, and neither of them understood the other's real meaning.

"There's no need to gossip between men," Lin Qiannan was speechless, "Besides, men may not be able to survive the epidemic. If you are so on guard, you have missed a good opportunity. The majestic emperor of Yu Kingdom is infected with the epidemic. If you die, you cannot escape the blame, and you will definitely feel guilty on the battlefield in the future, and it will be difficult to compete in an upright manner."

"I said that if I were king, there would be no war," Xing Wu looked at him expectantly, "Just trust me once, okay?"

"really?"

"really."

"What is the evidence?" Lin Qiannan asked.

Xing Wu thought for a while, pointing to the moon and said: "Using the moon as a basis, as long as there is a bright moon in Yu, and as long as I am still the emperor of Yu, there will be no war between Yu and Nan, and you and I don't need to meet each other on the battlefield. "

Lin Qiannan let out a "hmm", believed his words, and closed his eyes to sleep.

Granny Cao has a field of one-third of an acre. It was harvest season, so Lin Qiannan helped Granny Cao harvest the rice in the field, and then cooked lotus seed porridge with fresh rice and sun-dried lotus seeds.

Granny Cao kept smiling all day long, out of her sincere love for Lin Qiannan, she said, "Try the porridge made with new rice."

Lin Qiannan approached and sniffed, frowned inaudibly, picked up the bowl at the same time as Xing Wu, took a sip, and said with a smile: "With the addition of dried lotus seeds, the porridge tastes very sweet."

Granny Cao also took a bite, and said: "I'm old, my taste buds are not very good, and they all taste the same, hehe... I feel relieved seeing how delicious your food is."

Xing Wu didn't say a word, because the porridge in his mouth was bitter, and the lotus seeds were also bitter, maybe it was the damp lotus seeds out of season, the bitter taste couldn't match the sweetness that Lin Qiannan ate.

Xing Wu suddenly said: "Qiannan, we should hurry back to the capital."

"Well," Lin Qiannan agreed, "Today is too late, we will leave tomorrow."

"Are you leaving?" Granny Cao disappointed, "That's fine, young people shouldn't stay here with the old man, I just hope that you can come and have a word with the old man when you pass by again."

"Yes, thank you for your hospitality."

"Thank you." Xing Wu supported his forehead and shook his head, but he couldn't stop the sleepiness.

This feeling of drowsiness was very familiar, as if he had experienced it in Xunmenglou, he fell asleep before he had time to think about it, Lin Qiannan seemed to have said something to Granny Cao before going to bed.

In the early morning of the next day, Xing Wu woke up with a start. Dressed neatly, he looked around for Lin Qiannan who had disappeared.

Lin Qiannan yawned and stepped into the room, his eyes were black and he yelled: "You robbed my bed last night and made me sleep on the floor all night."

"Sorry." Xing Wu was convinced.

Lin Qiannan looked at him for a while, then smiled and said, "Clean up, we'll go on our way after breakfast."

He went out of the room and went to a place where no one was paying attention. His legs were trembling constantly, and he stretched his muscles and bones while supporting his sore waist. He lamented how strong the young man was, and he slept like a normal person.

"I hope it will work once." Lin Qiannan didn't want to try that kind of thing for a short time.

Unknowingly, Xing Wu tidied up the house softly, and did not notice the fading red spots on his body for the time being.

After leaving Granny Cao's house, Xing Wu rode the horse for two consecutive days. Lin Qiannan sat on the horse's back in a daze all the time, even laying his head on Xing Wu's back indifferently.

Xing Wu was quite afraid that he would fall down on his horse, so he kept one hand free to hold him.

"Your hands are cold." Xing Wu said.

Lin Qiannan muttered to himself, "Fart... Butt hurts."

The wind was mixed with Lin Qiannan's voice, Xing Wu couldn't hear it clearly, and asked, "What?"

"Huh?" Lin Qiannan said, "Did I say anything?"

Lin Qiannan seemed to be infected with the cold, Xing Wu found an inn, Lin Qiannan seemed to be stuck in the bed, wrapped himself in a quilt into a silkworm chrysalis, and didn't want to eat or take medicine.

Xing Wu put down the medicine bowl helplessly, touched Lin Qiannan's cold forehead, glanced at the bitter soup in the bowl, took a mouthful, pulled Lin Qiannan out of the quilt, and prepared to pass his mouth.

Lin Qiannan took the medicine obediently, and Xing Wu left his soft lips in satisfaction, and was about to feed him another mouthful. Lin Qiannan, with the medicine in his mouth, puffed out his cheeks, opened his eyes in a daze, and "poofed" Spit out the medicine on Xing Wu's face.

"It's hard to drink." Lin Qiannan wrapped himself into a silkworm chrysalis again, and then moved towards the wall.

Xing Wu wondered if Lin Qiannan was 30 years old.

He wiped his face with a handkerchief, opened the window and jumped onto the roof.

"Young Master Xing," Huo Liang handed him a medicine bottle, "This is the panacea handed down by my ancestors, which can cure all diseases. Although it can't cure the poison, the Yanyan epidemic may be able to."

"How do you know that I have the disease?" Xing Wu narrowed his eyes.

"It's Mr. Lin..."

"He knows you've been following us?"

"I accidentally exposed it, Your Majesty please give me a death sentence." Huo Liang knelt on the tiles, holding the medicine bottle in his hand reverently.

Xing Wuquan calculated a thing or two, calculated that today is the last time limit for the epidemic, finally took the medicine bottle, and then took the panacea that can cure all diseases.

Back at the inn, Lin Qiannan covered his head with a quilt, revealing a bloodless face, and the cinnabar mole on his forehead seemed to have faded a bit.

"Where have you been?" Lin Qiannan asked.

"Go see my subordinates."

"Oh, I know who it is. It's a winter melon who followed us all the way."

"Winter melon?" Xing Wu smiled, because it was the first time he heard that Huo Liang, who was so powerful, looked like a winter melon.

"Don't you think he looks like a wax gourd?" Lin Qiannan raised his head, his eyes full of innocence, "You look like...you look good."

Xing Wu sniffed Lin Qiannan to confirm that Lin Qiannan did not drink fake wine.

Lin Qiannan poked him in the face, "You look, uh...Xing Wu looks very much to my liking, Han Qi is...a bit fierce."

"Am I fierce?" Xing Wu's heart softened, and he reached out to hug him.

Lin Qiannan nestled obediently in his arms and said, "Aren't you fierce? I vaguely remember... Han Qi is a very fierce person."

Five years ago, Han Qi was a very fierce person.

"Well, he is very bad." Xing Wu hugged him even tighter.

"But he can't help it. I can understand him." Lin Qiannan found a comfortable position and lay in his arms, his cold hands desperately needing some warmth, so they rubbed into his palms.

"I'm dizzy, did I say something wrong?" Lin Qiannan was so sleepy that he couldn't really fall asleep.

"No."

"When we return to the capital, you and I will be strangers," Lin Qiannan said, "So for today, just treat it as you or I are dreaming."

Xing Wu stroked his hair and gave a difficult "hmm".

"Thank you for not marrying Ya'er. She doesn't like you, and she won't be willing to be trapped in Yu Kingdom's palace." Lin Qiannan said.

"She likes you."

"You know this too? You really know everything," Lin Qiannan didn't mean to mock him, "I can't ignore Ya'er's affection. She waited too hard, what can I do?"

Xing Wu brushed Lin Qiannan's hair up and down.

"I followed her wishes and agreed to marry her, but now... I regret it again. I may not even be able to give her the respect of a guest. What should I do?"

"You can," Xing Wu said, "you will live for a long time, you will have the happiness of a man in the world, even if you respect each other like a guest, I hope you can promise it to Ya'er."

Lin Qiannan paused, raised his head, and looked at him with neither sadness nor joy in his eyes: "Why?"

Why are probably the three most useless words in the world, if everything has a reason, where did all the joys and sorrows come from?Besides, the answers are mostly lies, it is better not to ask.

"I can't say, because I don't want to lie to you." Xing Wu's eyes are something that people can't see through.

Lin Qiannan said, "Well, maybe you're right."

"No possibility," Xing Wu put him down on the pillow, and said softly, "If you are sick, rest more, don't talk nonsense."

"I have another question." Lin Qiannan blinked, "Can you not take off the mask until you return to the capital?"

"Afraid that the face under my mask will scare you?" Xing Wu smiled.

"No," Lin Qiannan said, "I'm just afraid that Xing Wu will disappear."

Xing Wu smiled coldly, tucked the quilt for him, and said: "As long as you need me, I will not disappear."

The author has something to say:

I have another cold! ! ! ! ! !

Hiccup, Qiannan may fall in love again.

Can a person really have no emotions?the answer is no