[Yuri on Ice] Everything from the sea

Victor sat on a bench in a side street, with his arms spread across the back of the chair, looking up at the dark, silent summer evening sky.A few clouds moved slowly, covering the dim setting sun.

He took out the cigarette from his trouser pocket again and lit it, taking a deep breath.

Must be calm.he said in his heart.Yuuri won't run far, he doesn't have any money on him, and he hasn't said hello to anyone - but he still can't control the anxiety, worry and pain in his heart.

He was going to make a phone call and scold Chris, and he even wanted to jump on a plane and fly back to Russia to beat him up. What kind of crazy plan is this?For the first time, he was depressed that he had been thrown to Japan since he was 16 years old. His love roots were planted too early, so he didn't have any formal love experience, so he listened to that bastard Chris - Chris was according to himself standard assignments, overly fussy clothes, what else "you take him to a horror video so you can take advantage of it. If all the hints don't work, you seduce him with yourself, and he too Man, if he is interested in you, he will also have desires..."

God knows why Yuuri misunderstood that he wanted to use him for practice, he was really nervous at the time, but it was only because it was the first time he took the initiative to touch the sober Yuuri like that, and the person he liked like that, he was careful, he Walking on eggshells—he loved him like his treasure, and now his treasure had shot him in the chest and then stomped on it.

He thought Yuuri was just going back to the gym in a fit of anger, so he didn't go to him immediately last night—but when he tossed and turned in the hotel bed all night, and finally stayed up until dawn and ran back, he found that there was nowhere his shadow.

He called Hasezu Yuuri's home and knew that Yuuri hadn't come home, and he also got the news that Anfisa had returned to Moscow.He pulled himself together and coaxed Hiroko to comfort Hiroko, and then mobilized those who were free in the gymnasium to go out with him to find him.As he questioned one passerby after another, arrived at one place after another to take in one disappointment after another, he had Yuuri's anxious face in his mind. Four years ago, he was the same way, asking people one by one, looking for him from place to place.Bars, shopping malls and hotels, any hopeful thoughts that quickly faded hit his mind again and again, and he realized again how painful Yuuri had been (now his heart is like being run over by a wheel), and how strong he was.His short stature contained great strength, and he always had a submissive appearance on the outside, and he seldom took anything seriously, but when he was really serious—often the proud Victor couldn't bear it.

He used to look for you in every place with such despair, loneliness and pain.And now you have to look for him everywhere with the same despair, the same loneliness, the same pain.Viktor felt that it was all retribution, retribution for his proud and conceited heart - he had been tricking him with some white lie, or a harmless trap to get his way, and never said an apology, He even took it for granted, even if he liked Yuuri, he didn't seriously ask Yuuri what he thought of him and acted on his own.

"You have to tell me the truth, Pizza." Victor stood with arms folded in Yuuri and Phichit's bedroom, looking at the dark-skinned boy who just rushed in from outside, "You were the last person Yuuri saw."

"I'm exhausted, let me take a breath, I've searched everywhere - what do you call me?" Phichit stared wide-eyed, "Don't think you are someone I admire and you can bully me! I promise to wait Yuuri come back and tell him!"

Victor coughed, "I'm sorry, Ph, Phichit-san. Wait a minute," he also widened his eyes, "Do you think he'll come back?"

"Because—" Phichit looked him over from head to toe, implying that his existence was the reason, but he decided to keep his mouth shut like a good friend loyal to Yuuri. "I just want you not to be so upset. But I'm telling you the truth, Yuuri just borrowed some money from me, didn't say where he was going, and I thought he just wanted to go somewhere to have a good meal or play in an arcade Big bucks—I mean hundreds of coins. I didn't expect him to come back in the morning. It's true."

It is indeed true.Phichit thought.If he'd known Yuuri was going to play Missing - he really didn't look like playing Missing Man, just like the silver-haired man across from him at the moment - he'd definitely stop him.

"You guys had a serious accident, didn't you?" Phichit looked at the heavy expression of the man opposite.Then he gleefully prodded him to know what was going on, "Oh, you must have bullied him, you must have broken his little heart - the great Viktor must have done something unforgivably terribly wrong... He observed the other person's expression, thinking that he would definitely refute loudly—the idol-like Victor!So proud!However--

Victor just leaned against the locker silently, and then he said with a trembling voice, "That's right. I made a big mistake, a big mistake that lasted for so many years—"

Phichit had never seen Victor like this - he bet everyone hadn't, he was always so shiny, confident and elegant as if everything was no problem in front of him.but. . .

So he dropped his cynical tone and said slowly, "I don't want to see Victor again, until then."

"What did you say?" Victor looked up in surprise, "Yuuri said that? What do you mean?"

"I really don't know what he meant. The last thing he said was this, and I was already in a drowsy sleep." Phichit returned to normal and spread his hands, "I thought he was just talking angry, I Having said that, I really didn't expect him not to come back."

A cup of hot coffee was bubbling on the windowsill.Viktor stared at it, then picked it up and drank most of it in one gulp—making him sweat all over again.Drinking hot coffee on a summer day might seem like a silly choice, but he hoped it would take away a lot of unease in his heart.

At this moment, he took the newly opened Shinkansen, and his destination is Kyoto, the authoritative place that controls the kendo world in the western part of Japan. It may not be able to keep up with the long history of Osaka, but it has more advanced facilities and better teachers. .If you want to improve better, there is only Kyoto besides Osaka.

'before that. '

He spent nearly two hours thinking about the meaning of this sentence.According to ordinary people's thinking, after being disappointed and losing their temper because the other party didn't do well, they should wait for the other party to explain and make the necessary changes, or just cut off the relationship with despair—this is what Victor said. Terrified, he tried not to think about it.

But Yuuri is different.It's hard to spot - as he figured earlier, Yuuri is rarely really angry, so the references for him are few and far between, but he knows him from almost a decade of living together.After countless small unhappiness accumulated and exploded, he would not silently wait for the other party to do something that satisfied him.It is impossible for him to return to his hometown like surrender, and he will not waste time in entertainment venues in a fit of anger. He will take the initiative to change himself in order to change the other party's view of him, or run away forever.

'before that'.When Victor came to the huge dojo of the Kyoto Kendo Association wearing a cap and mask hastily bought in a small shop next to the station, pretending to be a patient with a bad cold, he was relieved to find that his guess was right—he found Yuuri.

He stands by the dojo, suppressing his pounding heart, hiding behind the bustling crowd, and starts sneaking in Yuuri's direction until he can see him clearly.But Yuuri is not in the middle of the dojo——Kyoto is really different. In the huge dojo, many groups are practicing in full swing, and it seems that there is an impromptu competition in the middle, with shouts one after another.Viktor didn't pay attention to the uproar, he just stared at a deserted corner where Yuuri was standing alone practicing.He was not wearing protective gear, and the white T-shirt was glued to his weak but strong body. He swung the bamboo sword earnestly with stabs and strokes, with a solemn and solemn expression on his face—he didn’t seem to care that no one taught him , and he doesn't even care that no one is sparring with him, his whole spirit is integrated into his own world.

Victor's eyes flickered.Yuuri is like a young sapling, immature and tenacious, one day he will grow into a towering tree with rain, dew and morning light.

Victor turned around and walked out of the gym in silence.And then at dusk, he's back again, hiding in the shadow of a vending machine, watching Yuuri go in and out between the dojo and the locker room - he seems to be called out to do chores like a rookie, he goes back and forth Moving the protective gear and scattered bamboo swords back and forth, wiping the sweat dripping from his forehead from time to time.Then when the sky finally darkened and the noisy gym became completely silent, Victor saw Yuuri push open the door of the cubicle (it seemed to be a small warehouse) next to the dressing room, and then he didn't come out for a long time.

Victor fought the urge to rush and push the door open.He really wanted to buy him a glass of milk in the vending machine or something and put it in front of his door, but he still took the steps to leave.

the next day.third day.Victor changes the color of his cap and clothing, sometimes wearing sunglasses.Sneaking in like this every day, and sneaking out again.

The summer evening wind is very comfortable on people's faces.In the dark sky floated the looming glow.A Shinkansen bound for Osaka buzzed away, and the yellow lights in the car windows turned into dim yellow spots as they got farther and farther away, until they disappeared completely.A little moonlight hit the railroad tracks, and a pair of leather shoes creaked on the sand beside the railroad tracks.

Victor has to go back to Osaka every day because he has unfinished commercials and some business commissioned by Gym Fujiwara.And he has to go back—because he knows that if he stays, he'll be knocking on Yuuri's door one night.He travels between Kyoto and Osaka every day just to catch a glimpse of him.He also walked through a stop like this every day.

He accepted his punishment. 12 years.He doesn't know that he's been making a mistake, Katsuki Yuuri has grown up long ago, he's a grown man with his own self-respect and pride.His self-righteous protection and consideration became the broken bond between them.He didn't wake up when he vowed not to leave him a few months ago, he thought he still needed his protection, and the protection he strengthened from that moment finally caused today's consequences - he could only watch him secretly , with longing and heartache, with guilt and piety.

He secretly watches him argue with the coach, who also wears glasses, as if he wants to train with everyone.

He secretly watched him training alone until he was out of breath again and again, lying on the ground trembling slightly, the wet clothes stuck to his stubborn spine.

He secretly watched him struggling to move those things again and again, without frowning, and then touched his sore wrist from time to time, smoothing the band-aid on his fingers.

Again and again he heard him screaming alone in the silence of the public bathroom—presumably the water was suddenly too cold or too hot—and then he ran shivering to his warehouse in the wet T-shirt he presumably washed with the shower.

He secretly watched him eating the bento from the convenience store in the corner of the public cafeteria again and again. It seemed that the rice was very hard. He swallowed hard, and his throat moved hard—then the ball of rice finally went down, But he was so choked that tears welled up in his eyes. . .

Victor looked at the moon in the sky and the woods beside the road blown by the night wind, and once again covered his heart.He was so distressed countless times that he could only run to the bathroom and bend over, panting heavily.But he couldn't stop him, he was moved by his persistence, he admired his strength, and more importantly, he decided to respect Yuuri's decision-it was different from any other day, he decided to get rid of his protection, get rid of himself All the arrogance, arrogance and ego, if Yuuri is working hard for his goals, he can only do what he hasn't done in 12 years - cooperate with him, listen to him, if it can redeem himself, start a new life Treat him with respect.

Victor deviated from the track and came to the familiar oak tree.The wind blows its emerald green leaves, like a person whispering.He picked up the small sharp piece of stone on the ground and continued to carve on it.He repeated some words in his mind, and a fluttering leaf fell on his shoulder.

If you are still willing to come back, I will never hide anything from you again.

I will never treat you like a child again, I will listen to you carefully.

I will definitely treat you as a man equally and let you stand side by side with me.

So, please come back, I no longer expect so much, I just want you to come back soon, back to me.

Victor threw away the flake and strode home.On the big tree behind him, three lines of small characters were engraved crookedly and as simply as possible.

'First day, sorry. '

' The next day, numb. '

' On the third day, I cried. '