Pale Silence

Song Jian pointed at the circle drawn by Chen Mo, and said, "There is still a distance, let's try in another direction tomorrow."

Chen Mo took a deep breath and said, "Okay, you go and rest me first, I'm on duty tonight."

Song Jian said: "I just saw on the map that there is a rest stop five kilometers ahead. Let's go over and see if there is any food."

Chen Mo looked blank: "The food we brought is enough."

Song Jian blinked: "Go out and get some air."

Chen Mo stared at Song Jian with wide eyes, and it took him a long time to hold back a sentence: "Are you feeling better?"

Song Jian said: "It won't be uncomfortable if you divert your attention."

Chen Mo couldn't hold back Song Jian, so he had to go out with a gun, and the two of them were going to drive together to find a rest stop.

Xia Kai, who didn't know why, shouted from behind: "Brother Chen, can you bring me a bottle of Coke?"

Chen Mo: "..."

Fang Yingchen slapped Xia Kai on the back of the head: "You are the only one who has a lot to do!"

Any fool could see that Song Jian didn't really go to a rest stop when he took Chen Mo away.

Xia Kai rubbed his head in a daze, and for a long time he couldn't figure out where he was wrong.

Song Jian and Chen Mo were driving on the desolate highway at night.

Song Jian's hands were still shaking a little, so Chen Mo drove forward in silence.

The post-apocalyptic world is barren in the dark night. The remains of human civilization are slowly disappearing and decaying in this land occupied by zombies. High-rise buildings will collapse, bridges will break, grass and vines will re-occupy the world, and deer and wild wolves walk in the woods.

Chen Mo said, "You asked me to come out, what's the matter?"

Song Jian said: "Seeing that your condition is not very good, let me take you out to relax. You can't always be tense in front of those children, how tired you are."

Chen Mo took a deep breath and said, "I'm fine."

Song Jian brought him out as an excuse, but the rest stop was real.

There were some cars parked near the rest station, several cars and a bus, which were parked crookedly in the parking lot of the rest station, already covered with dust.

Chen Mo drove the car over and said, "The high-speed rest stop is the first resource supply point that comes to mind. There should be nothing here."

Song Jian got out of the car with a gun in his hand, looked around, and said, "Come in and have a seat."

There is a small restaurant in the rest stop, which provides light meals, coffee and snacks.

When the zombies broke out, the place was still in business, and the rice was cooking in the pot, which was overturned by the panicked waiter.The half-cooked food was dumped on the ground and stayed there for more than ten years, moldy, rotten, and turned into a pool of black things. In the end, even the stench was gone, leaving only traces of dryness , lying on the ground in a mess, lying with the body of the waiter.

Chen Mo poked the smudges on the ground with the muzzle of his gun, and found a bunch of keys from the body of the waiter. The keys were all labeled with the words "gate", "small gate" and "dormitory". The key had the words "warehouse" written on it.

Chen Mo asked, "Will there be a warehouse at the highway rest station?"

Song Jian said: "Look at this workshop. They also make simple meals, and sell tobacco, wine, snacks, and sausages. Where else can they put things?"

Chen Mo threw the key to Song Jian: "Let's go find the warehouse."

Song Jian followed behind Chen Mo and said, "Momo, you are not in good condition, Fang Yingchen can tell."

Chen Mo searched the highway rest stations room by room, and said sullenly, "It's nothing, I just thought that the end of the world is coming to an end, but Grandpa couldn't see the world return to normal."

Song Jian said: "Are you still worried that the old man will blame you?"

Chen Mo said softly, "I don't know."

They found the warehouse door, which had been pried open by other survivors, and there was nothing left inside.

Fifteen years have passed, and the escaped survivors have no chance to farm and work like the people in the safe zone, so they can only do everything possible to search for all the materials left over from the old world.

Song Jian dug out a bottle of wine and two cigarettes from the corner. He had quit smoking for a long time, so Chen Mo took it away as a matter of course, and lit one casually.

Chen Mo slowly exhaled smoke rings, his proficient appearance was like that of Song Jian ten years ago, his handsome pale face reflected a little sadness under the moonlight, and he whispered: "Back then, grandpa took me to the second floor of the clinic. He wanted me to discover Shen Hewen and end everything early. But he didn't find out, so he didn't mention it again. I think...he didn't want Shen Hewen to die. People are like this. They know what is right, but in their hearts they just With such a slash, I can't pass, I can't do it. I don't have other opportunities to kill Shen Hewen. When he forced Zhao Yan out of the resort and into Xia Kai's shooting range, I should have shot Shen. He Wen. But I..."

He looked at the tall buildings and the howling wind in the distance, and self-blame and hardship once again occupied his heart.

Because of a little thought, he delayed the best time and let Shen Hewen escape, almost never finding that person again.

But this time, Song Jian used his life to search for Shen Hewen's whereabouts for a long time, but he began to fear, fearing that he would miss another good opportunity.

Song Jian said: "Momo, you can't always be a perfect person with no moral and emotional stains. You are a human being, you will be afraid, panic, feel difficult to choose, and hesitate in front of perfect opportunities. decision. This is human nature, people are selfish, it just depends on what you care about most."

Chen Mo smoked slowly, silent for a while, hesitant to speak, he wanted to ask Song Jian what he cared about the most, he should have asked this question a long time ago.

But a lot of things happened later, and the facts made it unnecessary for him to ask again.

So after a long time, Chen Mo said softly in the cool night wind: "I want to go back to the past, back to the time when nothing happened, I want to open my eyes next second, and find that all of this is A nightmare. But time really passed too long, I fell asleep, woke up, fell asleep, woke up, so I gradually realized that I can’t go back. What happened in the past, I can’t go back again, I can’t answer The time before the nightmare begins, I can only choose to end it all with my own hands."

Song Jian said, "Aren't you going to ask me?"

Chen Mo lowered his head, threw the cigarette butt on the ground, lit a second cigarette, and said, "It's pointless. I knew what you would choose when Yan Ruoming was alive. Now that Yan Ruoming is dead, you don't have to." Choose again."

Song Jian smiled bitterly: "So you will never forgive me."

Chen Mo was silent for a while, and said softly: "Song Jian, I love you, but I don't know how to forgive you. Do you know that people's self-healing ability is limited, and those scars that are too deep will never heal in a lifetime , It’s just that the pain is gone, it’s not that it’s gone.”

Song Jian smiled wearily, raised his hand, and gently stroked Chen Mo's hair, his rough fingers fell on Chen Mo's neck.There were some bite scars there. It was when Chen Mo was bitten by a zombie when he took Yan Ruoming away from the transfer station.

Song Jian murmured: "I know...I know..."

Chen Mo looked up at Song Jian, who had more scars than him.They survived all kinds of difficulties and dangers in such a world, and no one had a better day.

Chen Mo raised his hand to caress Song Jian's neck, and his thin white fingertips touched the burn scars.

This was only a very small part. Song Jian's entire back was severely burned, which was the mark left to save him. The explosion almost killed Song Jian.

Chen Mo closed his eyes, the touch of the scar on his fingertips reminded him of that day.

He thought he was alone, he thought he had no way out, destined to be that sacrifice to the new god.

But his god appeared and took him to the far away place where he was born again.

No one can forget such a night, no one can resist such a fiery nostalgia.

He can't forget the pain of being let down and abandoned, but he can't forget the love that really existed.

Song Jian loves him, but cares more about Yan Ruoming.

So a fire of unwillingness and grievance burned in his heart, it can be said that Ruoming died, the fire was extinguished, only empty ashes remained, and there was a faint panic in the dead silence.

It's hard to get over it, of course it's hard to get over it intentionally.

He has only loved Song Jian in his life, from his childhood to the present, from the beginning of the end of the world to the end.

But there was someone more important in Song Jian's heart, and before he could ask, or get a more accurate answer from Song Jian, that person would have died, quietly, as if he had never existed before. .

So those uneasy feelings only existed in Chen Mo's distant memories, which seemed far away and faint, but they always refused to disappear, but those faintly existed, like a thorn stuck in his throat.No pain, no itching, no swallowing, no coughing, but whenever you swallow something, it will faintly remind you of its existence.

Chen Mo's rationality told him that he shouldn't care about a dead person, let alone a dead person who Song Jian had never taken out to miss.

But the grievances accumulated when I was young are backlogged in my heart, and I have nowhere to vent or complain for ten years. After all, I have become a thorn, choked in my throat and refused to leave.

Chen Mo rested his fingers on Song Jian's neck, touched the scars with his fingertips, closed his eyes in pain in the darkness, and murmured hoarsely: "Song Jian, you are such a bastard, I should beat you up as soon as we meet Don, let you kneel on the ground crying with a bruised nose and a swollen face, and I'll scold you so shamelessly."

Song Jian said, "Why didn't you do that?"

Chen Mo hesitated for a while, and said, "The situation is critical, and the most important thing is to bring the scientific research team back. I can't affect the mission because of personal relationships."

Song Jian said: "Momo, maybe the task is not that important, maybe other people's feelings are not that important. Maybe you are just a person, you can't hold yourself like this. If you hate me, you should take revenge on me. You are tired. You should rest and let others do the work. You hesitated in front of Shen Hewen, because you care about the people you care about, you have done nothing wrong, you have done too much."