Li Kui fell in love with Jia Baoyu

Du Zhenfa and I were born and raised in the same courtyard. Over the past 20 years, they are not brothers, but they are better than brothers.

Du Zhen is an active person. He is always enthusiastic and curious about life, and always has a lively and vigorous energy. You can never guess what he will do in the next moment.I envy him very much, even envy him.

I have been an obedient child since I was a child.Study hard, be friendly to others, and unite with classmates.The teachers all like me, and the adults all praise me.No one knows my sadness.

My parents are never happy with me.No matter how obedient and how hard I try, I will never be able to meet their requirements.If I get No.2 in the exam, they will be unhappy, saying why I didn’t get the first place; if I got No.1 in the exam, they are still upset, saying why I didn’t get full marks; If they don’t get compliments, they will say, are the exam questions very easy this time? Did many people in your class get full marks?

This leaves me at a loss.I was just a child at that time, and I didn't understand the complexity of the adult world.All I know is that I will never be able to please my parents.I am worried every day, for fear that I will be criticized if I do not do well.I never dared to make any demands on my parents.

Du Zhen is completely different from me.Du Zhen always does what he wants without thinking about the consequences, so he is often beaten.Du Zhen's father specially asked someone to customize a small fluffy whip, which was specially used to whip Du Zhen.When I came home from school when I was young, I could often see Du Zhen’s father running around the yard with a whip. Du Zhen laughed while running: “You can’t catch me! You can’t catch me!” The first time he was caught by his father, and then he was beaten so badly that he cried like a wolf.

Every time I heard Du Zhen howling at the top of my throat, my mother would say to me, look, how ruthless their parents are, your father and I have never hit you, you just live in the blessing and don’t know blessing.Mom's words sounded so reasonable, I didn't know what to say.

The world of Duzhen is completely unimaginable to me.Occasionally, when the adults at home are away, I will go out to play with Du Zhen.

Du Zhen's parents were worried about him.They found my home and sent generous gifts, hoping that my parents would allow me to take Du Zhen with me and set an example for Du Zhen.His mother wiped her tears and said, "There is really nothing we can do, and I don't know how to commit crimes to give birth to this debt collector. If he can have one ten-thousandth of your family's Chu Yu, we will be satisfied."

The gift is too heavy to be refused.In addition, Du Zhen's father is my father's boss, so my mother agreed.

So I started to ask Du Zhen to go to school every day. After school, I finished my homework first, and then took the time to give Du Zhen tuition.Du Zhen didn't resist this, he just couldn't sit still, trying to watch him do his homework for an hour would kill me.

As time went by, I learned more and more about Duzhen, and realized more and more clearly that we are people from two different worlds.

My parents taught me since I was a child to think twice before doing things, and to consider problems from the perspective of maximizing benefits.So I learned how to think about problems rationally and thoughtfully since I was a child, and people around me praised me for being mature and sensible.Du Zhen is not at all, he seems to never do things out of his mind, which is completely incomprehensible.I asked him why he did this, and he said with a natural attitude: "I want to do this, so I did it!" It was impossible to refute.Later, once he got too drunk because of a trifle, and on the way back he tripped over a stone and knocked his head bloody. I asked him: "If you don't drink, you will have nothing to do later. Before you drink Didn’t you think about it?” Unexpectedly, he asked me instead: “What does wrestling have to do with drinking? Last time I didn’t drink, didn’t I fall into the river?” I was so angry that I ignored him all day.

However, although I don't want to admit it myself, I know in my heart that Du Zhen's waywardness and freedom deeply attracted me.He did all the things I was afraid to do and lived a life I could never have.

After growing up, Du Zhen always thanked me, saying thank you for my help and tolerance to him over the years. He didn't know that it was actually another me who I helped and tolerated.I hope Du Zhen is doing well, I hope he can keep this innocence forever.I am willing to do everything I can for him, and I don't want him to live a depressive life like mine.

Then, suddenly one day, I realized Du Zhen's secret thoughts towards me.I was terrified.I didn't tell anyone, and I hid from Du Zhen for a month.One day after a month, I saw Du Zhen smiling at me standing in the sun, I decided to pretend not to know about it and continue to be buddies with him.I can't lose Du Jin.

I also asked myself, do I love Du Zhen?Later, I figured it out. If we talk about the love of couples, there is no such thing. What I have for Du Zhen is selfishness.I hope to find myself in him, and I hope to have another world that I can't touch by owning Du Zhen.I hate my life right now.

Then, as I got older, I realized I needed marriage.Whether it is because of my own life plan or the evaluation of people around me, I need a marriage.After considering all the people around me, I chose a girl among my colleagues.She is a local like me, with good looks, a well-to-do family, and a gentle temperament, which is very suitable for a wife.I pursued her for half a year and succeeded.After getting along for a while, I took her to meet her parents, and they were very satisfied.We decided to get married.

Out of an inexplicable complex emotion, I hid the whole thing from Du Zhen.Finally, when I finally made up my mind to tell Du Zhen, I realized that he already knew about it.That's right, our two families are so close, how could he not know about it.Du Zhen knew but pretended not to know. There was only one explanation, and he understood everything.There is a trace of sadness in my heart.

On the day of the wedding, Du Zhen wrapped the biggest red envelope in the audience and gave me a lily made of gold, wishing my wife and I a happy marriage for a hundred years.I accepted it with a smile and thanked him.After exchanging rings during the wedding session, I saw Du Zhen get up and leave.A small piece of my heart went with him.I understand that I will lose him forever.