summer storm

After drinking with friends, Ruan Xin returned home in a daze.

On the sofa in the living room, Xu Beishan was reclined reading a book, and the dim light of the floor lamp illuminated half of the man's face.

Ruan Xin put on his slippers, sniffed, half-opened his eyes bewilderedly, and walked straight to Xu Beishan as if there was an automatic wayfinding system, and plunged into Xu Beishan's arms all at once.

Smelling the familiar scent of the man, Ruan Xin let out a comfortable sigh, resting his head on Xu Beishan's shoulder and not moving.

Xu Beishan put the book in his hands aside, looked at the furry head in his arms, and laughed dumbfoundedly.

"Ruan Xin? Ruan Xin?" he called softly.

"Hmm..." Ruan Xin, who was a little drunk, heard Xu Beishan's voice, opened his mouth, breathed hard like a stranded fish, and then muttered something.

"Xu Beishan..." he said vaguely, "Are you wearing a book? Or a monster? Why do you know Zhou Zhiyan so clearly..."

Xu Beishan didn't answer the drunkard's babble, he stretched out his hand and flicked Ruan Xin's forehead. Amidst Ruan Xin's complaints, memories began to emerge in his mind.

That was... years ago.

It was a rainy night.

In the quiet hospital, the mobile phone next to him lit up, and a call came.

Xu Beishan still remembered that at that time, his mood was more dignified and dull than the rainstorm outside the window, almost to the point of no relief, and he became numb and slow to react to everything around him. He listened to the call notification tone, mechanically Pick it up, I just want to divert my attention.

On the other side of the phone, there was also the sound of heavy rain. In the rain that seemed to drown everything, the boy's cry seemed a little weak. It may be that the signal is not good, and there is a freeze from time to time.

"Zhou Zhiyan is a bastard, a slut, how can he be so disgusting, I hate him so much! I hate him so much!!!"

……

Xu Beishan lowered his eyes and did not speak.

He put his mobile phone on his lap, looked at the swaying tree shadows outside the window, and the sudden lightning, and emptied his brain.

The boy didn't care about the response of the person on the other end of the phone, he just confided to himself, extremely wronged and sad, like an abandoned puppy, running wet in the rain, shouting vigorously.

"Why do I like Zhou Zhiyan so much, why do I want to be a bitch?"

"I'm really sad. It turns out that when I'm sad, my heart hurts like this..."

"None of this makes sense, does it."

"I know, my liking is meaningless, everything between me and him is meaningless."

Xu Beishan still didn't speak.

He didn't know what to say, after all, this was not an area he was good at dealing with, and the boy on the other end of the phone was also a stranger to him.

"I just bought gifts for Zhou Zhiyan. I bought two books for him, one is Oscar Wilde's fairy tale collection, and the other is Wang Xiaobo's Red Fuying Run. Annotation, I know he likes these things, I didn’t take Chinese reading so seriously in the college entrance examination, but does Zhou Zhiyan care? He is in a nightclub with Xinhuandi, haha, I’m a joke, what am I?”

very noisy.

Xu Beishan reached out his hand and turned off the speakerphone.

The voice on the other side of the phone became quieter, but the boy was still chattering in the sound of rain.

"You know how much I like Zhou Zhiyan. Zhou Zhiyan told me that he couldn't help but like me alone, and his novelty towards me is limited. He hasn't broken up with me for three years, and he is already very worthy of me... ...I don't want to ask others to like me, even Zhou Zhiyan, I don't want to ask him to like me, if he doesn't like it, break up! If he doesn't like it, he will drag me and lie to me! Treat me like a dog!"

……

Thunder exploded in the sky, and Xu Beishan heard the boy's words stopped because of the thunder.

He seemed to have finally realized that the person on the other end of the phone didn't respond to him a word.

"...If you always tell you these things, you will bother me too."

"But I have no one else to say, sorry."

"I already, already broke up with Zhou Zhiyan."

"You are my best friend, can you not, look down on me."

……

Xu Beishan raised his eyes and was about to turn on the speakerphone again when he heard the beep of the phone hanging up.

He paused with his fingers and pulled the corner of his mouth.

Although it was cruel, Xu Beishan actually had a feeling of contempt for the boy's sad words in his heart. He even thought meanly, how lucky this boy is.

Compared to him who once again signed the critical illness notice, this boy has such troubles in this rainy day, how happy he is.

"You are my best friend, can you not, look down on me."

……

In my mind, the boy's words sounded again.

Xu Beishan supported his cheeks with his hands, and after a long time, he finally began to sob faintly.

If possible, how he wished it wasn't him who answered the call.

That day, Ruan Xin and Zhou Zhiyan broke up.

It was also that day that Xu Beishan's younger sister passed away.