Hanyu's dream of rebirth

Time flies, and most of this year has passed. Recently, Encore has nothing else to do, no album, no filming, but I am quite diligent on the show, sometimes I participate in activities, or shoot a commercial .

Because he had enough time, An Keruo started to write songs again. This time he wrote three songs, all of which he forgot to sleep and eat. For these songs, he stayed almost all day practicing songs. room, Li Xiuyan brought in the meals.

Among them, there is a song that An Keru likes very much. It is a love song called "Give Me a Reason to Forget".

"The rain has stopped, this sky, what is gray, I still remember, you said we want to be happy, the footsteps in the middle of the night are always harsh, afraid of loneliness, let the carnival city accompany me to turn off the lights, but even if the surrounding No matter how many people there are, I still feel alone. Whenever I smile, my heart cries fiercely. Give me a reason to forget, you who love me so much, give me a reason to give up. The decision I made at that time, some love, the more I want to get away but it becomes clearer. The most painful distance is that you are not around but in my heart. When I walk in every place I have been, I will always hear your most free smile. When I return Where I live alone, I am most afraid of seeing that coat you love to wear in winter, but even if there are many people around, I still feel alone. Whenever I smile, my heart is crying hard. Give me a reason Forget, you who love me so much, give me a reason to give up, the decision I made at that time was a little love, the more I want to pull away, the clearer it becomes, the most painful distance is that you are not by my side but in my heart, I can't find it The reason to forget, the parting in the heavy rain, I can't find a reason to give up, I wait for your determination, some love, the more I want to leave, the clearer it becomes, the most painful distance is that you are not by my side but in my heart, I Miss you···"

The lyrics of this song are almost a portrayal of An Keru's true feelings, so when he recorded this song, he couldn't help but burst into tears, his voice was full of the pain that the song wanted to express, Sad emotions, even his eyes were full of despair and confusion.At that moment, memories flashed in my mind, those happy images flashed one by one, and the helplessness and pain in my heart seemed to be poured into this song.

It was almost over once, and the sound engineer looked at An Keru who was still trapped in that kind of grief-stricken feeling in amazement. His heart was full of surprise and excitement. The emotional expression of the song will show a perfect expression When it came out, it was as if it happened right in front of your eyes.

An Ke frowned, his heart was beating violently, and he lowered his eyes, his thoughts were still trapped in the emotion of the song. At that time, he couldn't help thinking of himself, some fragments flashed in his mind, and then the slightest pain came from Head came, so tears will flow out.

Except for this song, the other two songs are relatively brisk songs. They are all songs that narrate a short story. The score and lyrics of each song are created by An Keru alone. Created in months.

"...you won't forget me, you don't need to forget me, I am so light to you, you can eat me from time to time like cotton candy on Sunday afternoon, adjust the taste of life, your own Sometimes you will miss me, miss my obsession with you..."

The recording of the song went smoothly, because An Keru created it himself. He understood the emotion and artistic conception of the song, so he immediately found the feeling.

After the song was recorded, it was released, and a series of promotional activities were held. During this period, Park Donghao also accepted a movie for An Keru, saying that the screenwriter personally named him to star in it.

An Keru was very surprised. After all, he hadn't acted many times, and his acting skills still needed to be honed. However, this screenwriter actually named him to play the role, which really surprised and puzzled him.

In South Korea, the screenwriter is very authoritative. He can choose the director and actors by himself. The screenwriter often occupies an important position in the production process, and the director cannot modify the script of the screenwriter without authorization.

An Keru opened the outline of the script, and the first sentence he saw shocked him. It read: This is a love story about same-sex couples...

Is it this kind of script?An Keru was surprised that Park Donghao actually agreed with him to participate in this kind of movie?Are you not afraid of scandal?Could it be that South Korea is so open now that it can openly accept homosexuality?

Somewhat incredible.

An Keru couldn't help watching it. The role he played was a personal guard who lived with the king since he was a child. His sister married the king and was a respected queen, but the king's feelings for the queen were not love, because the king The person he loved has always been him, but he never knew it.

The king and the queen have always treated each other with respect. The queen loves the king very much and has been holding back. Later, she gradually realized what the king was thinking.So what is she? !So she kept embarrassing his younger brother, and often satirized his younger brother. The pain and anger in her heart swelled day by day, and finally she couldn't help clarifying the matter with her younger brother. She hated him, and she accused him of He yelled at his younger brother.

He was shocked and bewildered, looking at his sister in disbelief, he didn't believe everything her sister said, Wang loves him?He sat on the ground in a daze, his sister's words echoed in his ears, and the torment and pain in his heart made him unable to breathe.

The king knew about it, so he told the story. Hearing the confession from the king himself, the queen became anxious.

He hesitated between love and family affection, and it was very painful for him to choose which side, but in the end he chose family affection, because the king was the lord he decided to protect and dedicate his life to, he was just a bodyguard, and the king was The king of the whole country, it is impossible for them to be together.

When Wang heard his answer, he became angry, and finally threatened him, hugged him to the bed, and beat him hard.

At the end of the story, when they went out for an outing, they encountered an assassination incident. He was assassinated and died in order to protect the king. .

This is a tragedy. The most brilliant part of the whole play is the choice between family affection and love after the protagonist knows the truth. The suffering, pain, despair, and confusion are almost empathetic.

An Keru knew that if this movie was made, it would definitely be a very good movie, but, is it really okay to be gay?He hesitated, not knowing why Park Dong-ho accepted this drama.

And there are sex scenes in this movie! !The script clearly stated that there are entanglement and intimacy scenes between the two male protagonists. Could it be that he really wants...not to!He's definitely not good at it, and he can't bear it, he can't do that kind of scene with another person he doesn't know, even if it's just a play.

But Park Donghao has already accepted it, what should we do?An Keru threw the script on the table in annoyance, closed her eyes and meditated.

If that person is Kim Jaejoong... An Keru shook his head and felt that he was going crazy, this is absolutely impossible, Kim Jaejoong has never acted in such a movie before, how could the screenwriter and director choose him What about acting?And even if he is selected, Kim Jaejoong will not agree to act, he will not accept to participate in a movie with this theme, no.

An Keru suppressed the thoughts in his heart and calmed down his violent heartbeat. He felt that his scalp was about to explode. He couldn't imagine that he was making out with another man, or with Jin Zaizhong. , none of which he could stop the violent beating of his heart, he absolutely couldn't accept it.

So should I make it clear to Park Dong-ho?But since he is going to follow up, he probably won't agree to his request... An Keru, who was getting more and more annoyed by thinking about it, simply went into the bathroom, trying to clear his mind.

He took off his clothes and stood under the punch to accept the warm water pouring. He clearly felt traces of water slipping over his skin, flowing gently and ambiguously against his texture, just like a lover's hand. touching and kissing.

An Keru recalled the description in the script that they had seen, they kissed fiercely, touching and rubbing each other's smooth and flexible skin with their palms, the moist and hot kiss went from top to bottom, all the way to the waist and navel, and then down... ··Thinking about that scene, An Keru was sad and shocked to find that he had reacted!The expression of disbelief on the face is reflected on the smooth white wall, so ironic, so ridiculous, so naked.He knelt down on the ground, with a sob in his throat, because he realized that he was just thinking about it, just imagining that person was Kim Jaejoong, and he actually reacted...

He couldn't accept it, so how could he forget his ridiculous and humble feelings?

The author has something to say:

"Give Me a Reason to Forget" quotes a female singer's song, which is very nice