25 hour

He was answered by another kiss from His Majesty on the eyes.

The rear cover was opened again, and this time there were two people sitting side by side watching the sunset.

Shen Teng leaned his head back on the rear of the car, raised the red velvet Oreo cake on his fingertips and poked it into his mouth, and asked with this bitter sweetness: "You know why I planned this" Run away'?"

Qin Zheng lowered his head and picked up the small stones on the ground one by one, and replied without thinking: "You want to verify something."

Shen Teng curled the corners of his lips, not at all surprised by Qin Zheng's understanding of him.

"Did you know that I would sneak away one day?" he asked.

Xu Shi picked up the stone he wanted, and Qin Zheng fairly stuffed his "treasures" into his and Shen Teng's pockets one by one, and replied in a gentle tone: "You may not know how bad your acting skills are."

Obviously, during this period of time, he seemed to be very adaptable to their steadily growing relationship, very active, and also very fond of Qin Zheng, but during countless sleepless nights, when Shen Teng looked out of the window and fiddled with the dangling bird in his heart, In the unceasing balance of life and death, why didn't Qin Zheng count the Icelandic sheep with his eyes open and facing the ceiling absently.

Shen Teng narrowed his eyes: "Your acting skills are pretty good."

Every day, she devotes herself wholeheartedly to accompany Shen Teng to perform the play of a perfect lover, watching the other party's occasional cautious emotions, Shen Toma still thinks that she really deceived Qin Zheng, and can't help secretly blaming herself from time to time.

"I didn't act," Qin Zheng squeezed Shen Ting's dissatisfied cheeks with stretched eyebrows, "I can look so relaxed now, and I suddenly figured it out when I called you this morning. Do you still remember?" I said, no matter what happens to you, I will live for a long time and remember you forever."

"Remember," Shen Teng winked at him jokingly, "Why, you now regret that you want to die with me? So you don't have to be afraid of anything anymore?"

Qin Zheng shook his head, and there was a determination in his lowered smiling eyes that Shen Teng couldn't underestimate no matter how many jokes he made.

He said: "In any case, I respect your choice, but I have also made full mental preparations, and I will keep seeing you in the next few days, and I must lobby you for surgery."

Shen Teng tilted his head: "Aren't you afraid that I will die?"

He asked easily, but Qin Zheng held his breath for a moment, as if he couldn't help his heart palpitations just by imagining the possibility. I'm even more afraid that you will die silently on my way to see you sometime."

There is no doubt that if you don't have an operation, you will die. The bomb will explode sooner or later, but sooner or later, but on the operating table, you can fight for a chance.

Qin Zheng hoped that Shen Tong would live on, like him, for a long time, and this was not against him because he still respected Shen Tom, but this time, Qin Zheng wanted to boldly intervene in Shen Tom that was originally not considered by anyone ( Including himself) cares about the future and can be a part of its real existence.

He wanted to bear this person's life and death together with Shen Teng.

"You just want to live by yourself, and you don't want to die, and you don't want to part with me, so you insist on dragging me to live in the world together," Shen Ma said leisurely, "This is very different from the love stories I have come across. In the story, what appears is Zhijiao’s life and death promise.”

He is good at changing concepts secretly, but Qin Zheng has a firm will and is the only nemesis of this sophist master.

"Life is beautiful, Shen Jiaying, I think you have realized this as well as I do. If we can stay together forever and fight side by side, wouldn't it be better than you and I doing that short-lived ghost who doesn't know if there is an afterlife after death?" Is it worth looking forward to? Die for love is touching, but I want to survive with you even more."

"What about blindness?" Under Qin Zheng's insistence, Shen Teng let out a breath and asked softly.

They all knew that he was still not ready to see him again.

When it came to the key point, Qin Zheng's expression became more correct. He seemed to have entered into a state of persistence with Shen Teng, and said seriously: "You know, no matter what happens, I will always be the first to listen to it. Your voice, but what I listen to is the real voice deep in your heart, not some other perfunctory disguise. No matter how stubborn you are, I know you want to survive now, you are just still hesitating, Shen Jiaying. "

Yes, that's right, in those beautiful days wrapped in love, even though Shen Toma first proposed to try, the results of the test seemed to really start to change to their original preset When the best direction deviates, Shen Teng faintly sprouts a small bud of hesitation in his heart amidst this conflict and conflict with his strong self-nature.

Are these all true?

Does he really like Qin Zheng so much and so deeply?Can it really make him abandon the belief he has insisted on for more than 20 years, and completely give up the freedom of coming and going as he pleases?When being with someone for a long time, when the freedom he is proud of is no longer pure, will Shen Teng suffer from the pain of self-doubt like this again and again?

Shen Teng admired Qin Zheng's open-mindedness, and was willing to believe in Qin Zheng's promise. Even under Qin Zheng's constant, patient, and undisguised sincerity, he really began to believe that eternal true love would come to him. But Shen Teng didn't believe in himself.

He knows very well that he will regard Qin Zheng as the most important existence in his life, but can he accept that Qin Zheng will always be the existence that he needs to put first in everything he does?Will one day, he will get tired of this kind of intimacy that he was most afraid of, and the original lovers will be forced to hate each other?This possibility is too scary.

Even before crossing the single-plank bridge, Qin Zheng, who had figured everything out, had officially given him another sense of perfect freedom, but when he woke up, Shen Teng, whose emotions had returned to zero, once again drew himself into a prison. frame bounds.

He lived too much, compared to Shen Ning and Shen Yuru, he was not inferior at all.

In the days of gradually losing faith in life, Shen Teng and Qin Zheng met for the first time on the side of a deserted road, and then met again on the life and death line in Zambia.When wandering meets indifference, what is wiped out is not ambiguity, but sparks of iron fighting.Afterwards, the lingering rendezvous again and again, the desire to reach the root of the tooth wandered away on the border of love, leaving him temporarily in the world to continue searching, but Shen Teng was still unwilling to admit the heartbeat that Qin Zheng brought to him. How important is it.

But at that time, in Shen Toma's heart, compared with a real person, the pursuit of the more illusory "freedom" was indeed superior.It wasn't until later that the doctor gave him a certificate of pardon that Shen Teng decided to see Qin Zheng for the last time without hesitation, so as to draw the best end to the only memorable relationship in his life.

But Qin Zheng caught up unexpectedly.Shen Teng hesitated and was afraid of this, and obviously couldn't help but secretly rejoiced that they still hadn't parted, but at the same time, he was still hesitating, confused by Qin Zheng's true thoughts, and also worried about how he actually felt. He will be afraid because he cares about Qin Zheng's true thoughts and even feels shaken by it.In this conflict that almost tore him apart, Shen Teng crossed the carriage looking for Qin Zheng like an asthma patient looking for a special medicine, but at the same time, he couldn't help but take him home and was full of annoyance, for fear of his own momentary mistake. , Since then, they have caused endless troubles for the two of them.

But he really likes Qin Zheng too much.The other party just tentatively put forward an application for a date, and Shen Teng agreed in a strange way, completely unloading his defenses, and letting himself fall into the deep sea of ​​emotion in Budapest.

But back then he was still making excuses.

He said, the destination of my journey has not changed, and at this moment, I am only temporarily bewitched by the heartbeat on the way, hoping to leave Qin Zheng with a beautiful memory even if it is short.

After coming to Iceland, he still thinks that way.It's just that on one specific day after another, with Qin Zheng's company, he finally couldn't help admitting that he had already felt reluctance.In the non-stop silent struggle with himself, Shen Teng couldn't help agreeing to Qin Zheng's request again and again, allowing him to make progress and press every step of the way, and finally when he stood beside him, he unexpectedly proposed, Give them a common chance.

In that unspeakable fierce struggle with each other and with himself, Shen Teng threw away his helmet and armor step by step, and finally in the early morning of Qin Zheng's first day at the age of 24, all the problems that needed to be solved were all attributed to a cold and extremely cold day. In the quiet embrace.

But Qin Zheng is right, if the cause is not eliminated, the result will follow forever.

Obviously everything is developing in a good direction, but Shen Teng once again lost the ability to distinguish the truth from the false in this strange beauty.He couldn't tell the reality of the happiness in front of him, and he didn't know what he wanted. The damn nature was born again, and kept asking in his ear again and again: Can you really accept this? everything?Accept that you will be living with another person for a long time, forever losing the self you once loved the most.

In the past, the feeling that nothing could restrain his mind was like a drug. Over the years, drips infiltrated his pulse, making Shen Teng painfully lose the desire to continue living, and when he was about to lose it, the withdrawal reaction was extremely strong. Deliriously, I began to be fascinated, unwilling, vacillating, and disconnected from that feeling of "freedom" again.

He doubted, so he ran away, and walked on this road of suicide that was first planned, trying to identify the weight of love and self, and find out which is the final truth.

Shen Tom originally thought that his "ego" had the upper hand when he was able to set off, but the facts once again proved to him that Shen Tom is still the guy who deserves to be lonely to death. stop his steps.

But soon he found that he was wrong.

When the first astonishing mountain peak appeared in his field of vision and his first reaction was to regret that Qin Zheng was not by his side, Shen Teng realized that those were all fake, even though he had already walked here alone in the end, Shen Teng "Death Journey" has also been a complete failure.

From now on, even if Qin Zheng is willing to let him go free, Shen Teng can't stop looking at him, thinking about him, and not forgetting him all the time.

The person who was paranoid, stubborn, and possessive in Qin Zheng's mouth was never the second young master, but Shen Teng himself.He felt helpless because of this fact. Although he was not depressed, he was still confused after all.

Qin Zheng is right, Shen Teng is not afraid of death, nor is he afraid of parting, even "fear that I will be bored with this relationship in the future" is just an excuse for pretending.

He was only afraid to admit one thing.

For a long time, just like he firmly believed that he did not decide to die because of illness, but encountered an illness on the way to the grave, even if he was really determined to "try to be better to himself" for Qin Zheng, Shen Teng would not I don't want to admit that I started to pursue the meaning of life because of another person.

He is afraid to admit that at a certain moment he will really no longer belong to himself, afraid to admit that from now on, the meaning of his life will be complete because of another person.Shen Teng is even more afraid to admit that he will, as the most vulnerable person in the world, entrust his future life to the emptiness of another person.

How childish and stupid.Among all the historical portraits of the natural world, it is the most unscientific and anti-evolutionary behavior that does not conform to Darwin's law to voluntarily hand over one's lifeline to another life.

He originally thought that he would never make such a promise until he died.

But at this moment, at the last moment of conflict, Qin Zheng suddenly appeared in front of him and said to him, "Happy birthday."

In an instant, all the entanglement and pain collapsed.

Shen Teng and Qin Zheng, they are both so similar and so dissimilar.

One was born on the banks of the ancient and lingering Danube, and the other grew in the pile of splendid brocades overgrown with lint.

One grew up in misty and indifferent care, and developed a temperament that loves to laugh but is ruthless.

A person who has never experienced true love, and even the most innocent boy only knows how to return everything with his fangs.

They are like the two incarnations of the wind and the soil in the world. When the moment of freedom hits the firm and steady eternity, those abstract and specific feelings are wrapped in a tornado and whistling silently. They are in the only quiet eye of the wind. Close to each other, countless fleeting touches, in exchange for the entanglement of souls that constantly dissipate but never die.

Hesse said that if there are two people who represent two principles and two worlds that are always opposite, then once these two people meet, their fate is doomed: they will definitely attract each other, be infatuated with each other, and will definitely be in love with each other. Conquer each other, understand each other, promote each other, or destroy each other.

"Shen Jiaying." Qin Zheng called out to him just like he did countless times before.

"My grandma only calls me that when she is extremely angry." Shen Teng said flatly.

"I only call you that when I love you so much." Qin Zheng replied quietly.

I think that there is really only this one person in this world who knows clearly how to make Shen Teng soften his heart, surrender, and be defeated.

Moving his fingertips up, Shen Teng finally hugged Qin Zheng forcefully in the wind that seemed to come from the bottom of a different world.

"I still can't tell what 'love' means to me." Shen Teng exhaled softly.

This graceful, magical, and illusory word, he once thought would never be related to himself.

but……

Shen Teng raised his arms to wrap around Qin Zheng's shoulders and neck, and took the initiative to stick his pulse to Qin Zheng's artery in the oldest way of courtship.

"But I think, the moment you walked towards me just now, I really fell in love with you." He said.

In the new year, you are my new life.