25 hour

"I'm 26 years old," Shen Teng emphasized again, "I'll be 27 next month."

Qin Zheng doesn't care how old he is now.

"How old were you?" he asked.

What a sharp question.

Shen Teng coughed lightly: "Eight years old."

Qin Zheng smiled: "Don't tell me that man is Edwin."

"No, no, please don't think of me that way." Shen Teng couldn't help but laugh too.

"That's my neighbor's sister... Well, I admit, my feelings towards her are very different from yours, but I have never felt that way towards anyone else, so let's just say Tsukuru likes it. Do you remember the Maltese schoolgirl at the Leopold Museum? She asked us if we thought sexuality was fluid, and I said yes, there is a reason. That sister's feelings."

Shen Tomato tried to phrase: "I haven't talked to her, I just often sit by the window and look at her. I think, out of some commonality and attraction, I have always been very interested in her. For a long time, I have always been very interested in her. miss her."

The little boy and the big sister, the crush in the attic across a cobblestone street in Old Buda.

Sounds wonderful.

But rather than asking about the details of the past, Qin Zheng is more concerned about the present: "Did you look for her after returning to Budapest?"

Shen Teng shook his head without thinking: "No, she doesn't even know me."

That elder sister will never know that in her short girlhood, someone has been silently paying attention to her, and later regarded her as a symbol of the starting point of her love life, and never forgot.Different from his feelings for Qin Zheng and everyone else, Shen Teng's love for his sister is very pure and clean. Even though Qin Zheng knows that this love does not pose any danger to him, he still...can't help it. Live a little jealous.

But Shen Teng, who was heartless and heartless, seemed to have finally reached the final secret sharing target, heaved a sigh of relief, and said with a smile: "It's your turn, Your Majesty."

Qin Zheng looked over: "What?"

Shen Teng clicked his tongue at him: "Don't play dumb, I've confessed, it's your turn."

Qin Zheng is 24 years old. He has good conditions in all aspects and has a lot of experience and contacts. People who have more opportunities to see the world will always have more opportunities to meet true love.

But Qin Zheng really didn't seem to have one.

real or fake?

Qin Zheng: "Really."

Shen Teng: "Excellent."

After thinking about it, Shen Teng gave an answer option: "Are you frigid?"

Qin Zheng chuckled, and asked without answering, "What do you think?"

Shen Teng recalled some scenes from the previous nights, and said frankly: "I think I'm talking nonsense."

Qin Zheng lowered his eyelids and laughed out loud.

Shen Teng said unwillingly: "There is always a first love when you are young, right? Uh, although it may be a little later than me, it was the first love when I was a child... But there is always an opportunity in everyone's life, let you start Interested in other people! You can rest assured that I'm not mad... well, I can be mad if you want, no no, I mean I'm mad but I can act like I'm not... ..."

Qin Zheng: "Stop talking."

Shen Teng: "Okay."

After a brief silence, the two of them held hands and bent over laughing together, overwhelmed with joy.

"I don't know if that counts..."

After laughing, the warmth in his eyes still hadn't faded, Qin Zheng touched his brow bone with the free hand that didn't hold Shen Ma, and said casually: "Do you remember? The one I mentioned The guy I bullied in high school."

Shen Teng nodded.

"I paid a lot of attention to him during that time. At that time, I was sensitive, sharp, and on point, but he always seemed to have a way to drive me crazy with a word."

"Wow, that's awesome."

Qin Zheng said "Mm" indifferently: "I think if you know him, you will probably like him."

Also growing up in a distorted family environment, Qin Zheng used rebellion and impulsiveness to deal with everything, but Xu Peck knew the way of forbearance at such a young age.Although it may be a bit useless to say so, I have to say that Qin Zheng learned a lot from Xu Peck in his calmness when he encountered most things after going abroad.

"It's nothing worthwhile," Shen Teng said with a smile, "I always believe that the people we have known in this life have shaped a part of us."

Makes sense.

Qin Zheng took half of the earphones given to him by Shen Ting, listened to the gentle and flowing "Iwishyoulove", and said frankly: "I grew up with Xu Peck, and my feelings for him are really complicated."

There is sympathy for the same sickness, as well as same-sex repulsion. When the contradictions were most prominent, it was the period when Qin Zheng was most confused about his life in the first 20 years, and obviously that Xu Peck had more reasons to be more deadly than himself, but he was struggling at that time. When he found a life-saving straw that looked ugly, he dragged the man out of the shadow step by step, leaving Qin Zheng alone in the haze.

Qin Zheng narrowed his eyes and was merciless to his own analysis: "Now that I think about it, maybe the important reason for my attitude towards him at that time was that I thought we were fellow travelers by different routes, but he told us with practical actions. Me, it's just wishful thinking on my part, it never occurred to him to be part of the environment we were in, and he wasn't at all interested in going down the same path as me."

Looking back with the eyes of the 24-year-old Qin Zheng, this is normal. Xu Peck is even admirable in some aspects, but it is a pity that he was only 17 years old at the time, and he didn't understand anything and was full of resentment. At his young age, he did many wrong things without knowing it.

Internal friction with himself is second to none, Qin Zheng has indeed hurt others.Fortunately, he still had some bottom line, and the other party didn't really care about Qin Zheng's childish behavior that was no different from "a little boy trying to attract people's attention".

Yes, although Qin Zheng had accumulated a lot of depression because of Xu Peck's neglect, but now he is very grateful to that person for not remembering himself.

"What you said just now is not right." Shen Teng interjected.

Qin Zheng looked back at him: "Which sentence?"

Shen Tom was still laughing: "The sentence about 'If I knew him, I would like him'."

Seeing that Qin Zheng didn't react, Shen Teng took a step forward on his own, then turned around and looked over: "You seem to be used to keeping me out of our relationship from time to time. I mean, I don't seem to be doing enough. Too much, so that you don't have so much confidence, I'm sure I actually like you very much."

At an arm's length apart, they were still holding hands.

Shen Teng said: "You liked him, or you didn't like him, but he used to have a very special position in your life. And I like you-based on this standpoint, I think it is difficult for me to know him Since then, I have pure affection for this little friend."

Hostility is out of the question, after all they've never really had anything.But... how to say, there will always be some other complicated emotions.

He suddenly realized what Qin Zheng was thinking when he heard the topic of "sister" just now.

"Is this called possessiveness?" Shen Teng asked curiously.

Obviously the most sentimental guy, but when it comes to "like" and "love", he always behaves like a real new apprentice.

Of course, this just makes everything more exciting.

Qin Zheng looked at him for a long time.Then he suddenly breathed a sigh of relief and smiled softly.

After walking around Tuoning Lake, the thinker Shen Teng is still talking about his thoughts: "I sometimes think, we read, we study, we write poetry, we... It seems that everything we do It's all about being loved more when we are lucky. I can't guarantee that our Shen family has jumped out of this vicious circle, but I think the selfish gene does have a higher proportion in our blood, at least this "being loved" ’ For me, for a long time it was ‘being loved by yourself.’”

It's just that Shen Teng's heart may not be as strong as Shen Yuru's. His love for himself is not enough to support him to have the courage to face a complete life. He can only do half of it, so he can only suffer half of it.

He wasn't sure if Qin Zheng could give him the other half.

At present, it may be possible, but Shen Teng still hesitates from time to time in his heart - he seems to be too clear-headed about all this.

Can love see the scale with clear eyesight?

If so, what about those waves of love that burn like fire?If not, then when the tide of love appears for a short time and then recedes, can the remaining love still be called love?

What does eternal love really look like?Has anyone actually seen it in this world?

Those people say that "love is the most beautiful when it is not in love", are he and Qin Zheng at this stage?Or is it past this stage?

He sees all these confusions too clearly, and the more so, even if Shen Teng is very sure that he likes Qin Zheng, he seems unable to freely enjoy the fun of love.

Maybe God arranged for Shen Teng's eye problems to be an opportunity. If he couldn't see it, would he be less worried about gains and losses?

"Would you like to try it on?"

Qin Zheng let go of Shen Ting's hand, folded his five fingers together and raised them up to cover his own eyes.

"Try to see nothing," he said.

Shen Teng's smile faded a little.

But when Qin Zheng put down his hand and looked at him, there was no panic in his eyes. On the contrary, he was very calm, as if he was just suggesting a choice for lunch.

Looking at each other for a moment, Shen Teng closed his eyes.

"Okay." He actually agreed.

Shen Teng noticed that Qin Zheng was standing behind him. When you can't see it, your other senses will become more sensitive.

Qin Zheng's hands surrounded him from behind and blocked his eyes, reducing the brightness of the world that was still glowing with warm light through his eyelids.

Shen Teng's mind suddenly became chaotic.He felt it was absurd and wanted to open his eyes, but he didn't know what resistance he encountered. Even though his eyebrows could not help but twist, he was still closing his eyes and waiting for what Qin Zheng would do next.

But the guy just asked him: "Do you believe Reykjavik Cathedral will disappear one day?"

"Of course," Shen Teng replied without hesitation, "the earth will always be destroyed, I firmly believe in it."

In fact, this is not the first time Shen Tomato tried to be a "blind person".

Before that, he also used a software developed to help the blind called "BeMyEyes". After registration, users will be asked to apply for one of two identities: blind or volunteers, and the number of the latter is ten times that of the former. several times.

After downloading, Shen Teng didn't register for a long time, the reason is very simple, because he didn't know which identity he was going to apply for.

But in short, he later applied to continue using it as a volunteer user.Shen Teng has made enough mental preparations. If he wants to help someone, it may be to help the other person recognize the instructions on the medicine bottle, it may be to help him study the buttons of the remote control, or it may be just to have a relationship with that person who has been immersed in his lonely world for a long time. The poor man simply chatted.But guess what, he hasn't received a single call until now.

This made Shen Teng's mood more complicated.

He didn't know whether he expected to know that blind people can live well by helping others, or whether he wanted to realize that blind people could live well by themselves because they couldn't get a phone call.

Can't tell.

And those numbers that record the number of users and the thank-you emails sent by the development studio from time to time are like wooden blocks that have been drawn away in the Jenga game. No one knows which one will make his spirit Complete breakdown.When he realized this, Shen Teng did not delete the app, but he deceived himself and turned off the notification push.

Shen Teng opened his eyes.

He was still smiling, but there really wasn't much real smile left in his eyes.

"Let's go here today and try again next time," he said.

Qin Zheng raised his eyebrows slightly, and his tone was a little surprised: "Is there a next time?"

The smile in Shen Teng's eyes grew a little more: "I'll try my best, okay?"

Qin Zheng raised his hand and rubbed Shen Teng's forehead with his fingertips - he likes to do this very much recently.

But perhaps because of the stress reaction just now, Shen Teng unconsciously hid when he approached him this time, and stopped in embarrassment when he realized this.But Qin Zheng just pretended not to notice, and without a pause, he firmly landed his fingerprints on Shen Teng's skin, and asked him warmly, "Can I ask you out tomorrow?"

Shen Teng pretended to be embarrassed: "I want to be a piano."

Qin Zheng pretended to be disappointed: "Oh..."

Shen Teng couldn't pretend anymore, and smiled for a while before saying anything: "Then I have to pay for your next rest time in advance?"

Qin Zheng raised the corners of his lips and shook his head: "I'm not used to being overdrawn and happy."

He leaned over and leaned close to Shen Teng's ear: "Tomorrow will be arranged by you during the day, but can you go to Jeff's house with me as a guest at night? I have social anxiety. I will come to pick you up."

Shen Teng also leaned close to his lips, and said in a nonchalant way: "Are you acting like a baby?"

Qin Zheng rubbed the tip of his nose: "If you think so."

Shen Teng let him dawdle patiently for a few seconds, tilted his head and moved away a little further.

"I don't think so, but I want to see you acting like a baby. I'll decide if you act like a baby."

Qin Zheng was like a child whose toys had been taken away. He frowned and looked at him for a while, then lowered his head again, buried his head in Shen Ma's shoulder, raised his arms, and hugged his waist deeply and forcefully. limb.

They spoke in unison.

Qin Zheng: "I love you so much."

Shen Teng: "Okay, I'll go."

Shen Teng smiled and raised his hand to rub Qin Zheng's short, neat hair.

You don't have to do anything, he thought.

It's scary, it seems like I'll always say yes to you.

So happy, at least I will always promise you.