my private life

When Xue Xiaomei called me to ask me out, I was still hesitant about meeting them.

I met Xue Xiaomei in the group a few years ago. Because of some hobbies, we gradually became good friends who talked about everything.

"Sister, today is your birthday, everyone wants to get together."

It is precisely because today is my birthday that I am reluctant to go. "Alas, nothing to celebrate."

"You already have arrangements?"

I understand what she means, apart from your parents and family, your friends will remember your birthday. Of course, the younger sister alludes to the lover that everyone can't live without.

At my age, my lover should bear the brunt of celebrating my birthday. Unfortunately, I am alone now.Only my parents and friends still think about my birthday.

Early in the morning, my mother called and asked me to go home at noon, saying that she had made dumplings stuffed with pork and fennel for me.After eating dumplings and drinking two small glasses of wine with my dad, I felt very relieved.

Although I am still single at thirty, and my love life has not yet settled down, I still have my parents who love me, a job I like, and a small house purchased with a mortgage. I think I should be content.

In the afternoon, there were two more text messages on my mobile phone.One belongs to Xia Jingyi and the other belongs to Lu Feng.I was originally in a happy mood at noon, but because of these two text messages wishing me a happy birthday, it suddenly became dull.

Since meeting by chance on the street a few years ago, Xia Jingyi will send a "congratulatory message" every year on this day, and every time after the words "Happy Birthday to you", she will propose to have dinner together.

Every time I refused, and at the same time politely replied with two words "thank you".

How smart Xia Jingyi is, she understands the alienation represented by my politeness.So she just clicked through and stopped making any replies.

What made me sad was Lu Feng's greeting, she actually remembered my birthday.I held the phone and hesitated for a long time, trying to figure out how to reply to her blessing.Maybe not replying at all is the best reply.We should forget each other.

A year ago, the words Lu Feng said before leaving still seemed to be in my ears, "I like him, and I can't let him go. I hope you can bless me. Bless me for finding a more suitable person and life."

With my relatively straightforward personality, I always feel that she and I will become two strangers from now on, and we will no longer have anything to do with each other, but Lu Feng hopes that we can still be friends.

Perhaps, she sent a text message without any special meaning, but just regarded me as a friend.Just like when she got married, she insisted on inviting me to her wedding.

There are indeed such people around me, the lovers turned into good friends in the end, and they can still maintain a good relationship, but I can't.I couldn't do it, watching Lu Feng and her husband showing affection, I was like a fool, smiling and happy for her.

After hesitating for a long time, I deleted the text message and did not reply to her.

Xia Jingyi and Lu Feng are both my ex-girlfriends, and they and I are like a cross formed by two straight lines, with only one point intersecting.Leave the intersection and start again, no matter how connected each other's roads are, our result is destined to part ways.

After work, I went to the hotel reserved by my younger sister, where I met Gao Ang and Tangtang, a few good friends.

"If you don't come, we will celebrate your birthday here as usual, eating cake and lighting candles." Gao Ang smiled and showed two small canine teeth, looking very cute.

"What do I listen to, it seems that I, the protagonist, shouldn't be here. Hey, you just think I'm here to grab a meal." I was also joking.In front of these friends, I am very relaxed, and my mood is not as lost as before.

"We really thought you had some arrangements. Of course, I hope you have an arrangement. By the way, arrange us too." Tangtang seemed to be saying a tongue twister.

Before I could open my mouth, Gao Ang said disdainfully, "If Sister Mo Fan really had arrangements, she would have missed us a long time ago."

"Am I the kind of person who values ​​sex over friends? Am I?" I rolled my eyes back at her, "If I really have any special arrangements, I'll be the first to tell you."

We were talking and laughing when Shang Jun brought a woman I had never seen before into the box.Because there are newcomers, everyone is very restrained at once, but I can feel a tinge of excitement in this awkward atmosphere.Because this woman who looks 27 or [-] years old is considered a beauty.

We are all happy for Shang Jun, she has a girlfriend.According to the general rules, bring a friend who doesn't belong to this circle, and show up at your friend's party.Usually it’s nothing more than wanting everyone to get to know each other, helping with reference, and also wanting to let my girlfriend integrate into my circle of friends.

"My name is Xiao Yao." The woman introduced herself gracefully.

"This is Mo Fan, tonight's protagonist, Lord Shou Xing." Listening to Shang Jun's introduction, I nodded slightly at Xiao Yao.

Shang Jun, with thick short hair and a little fat, sat down next to me, turned his face and asked in a low voice, "How do you feel? I just met on the Internet."

When we first met, I didn't pay much attention to Xiao Yao, and I could only tell her my first impression, "It looks good, very pretty." I couldn't help but look at Xiao Yao, and my eyes just met hers.

I smiled politely and looked away.I found that everyone was secretly examining the newcomer.

"Teacher from Provincial University of Finance and Economics. I'm chasing her, but she doesn't seem to be very enthusiastic. She didn't want to come, so I came here after trying to say something." It has been more than a year since Shang Jun broke up with his ex, she should find someone girlfriend.

Because a stranger joined, everyone's speech was no longer as casual as before.The topic naturally revolves around some of the problems that tend to arise in same-sex relationships.

"I really don't have the right to say this. I don't know if I want to get married yet." Xue Xiaomei, who has been quiet all the time, said, "If my mother knows that I like women, she will faint."

Parental approval is a real problem that all of us here must face.Except for Yu Ziwei who has a girlfriend among these people, the rest are currently single.

"Actually, you haven't met the right one. If there is someone who makes you willing to spend the rest of your life with her, then maybe it won't be a problem." Shang Jun said this at this time, perhaps to her new acquaintance. Girlfriend listened.

The little girl shook her head disapprovingly, "There really is no such person."

"It's really possible, like me. How about we start dating from now on. I'll chase you, do you think it's okay?" Gao Ang leaned his face and looked at the little girl with a playful smile.

We all laughed.No one will take it seriously, it's a joke they often make.

"Well, let's talk about it after sending me home tonight." The little girl became serious.

Tangtang, who was gnawing on a chicken paw, finally raised her head, "Hey, there's me too, Ang, you have to send me home too."

"Uh, okay." Gao Ang agreed not very happily. "Why do you become a threesome if you don't pay attention, it's not appropriate."

I noticed that Xiao Yao seemed a little puzzled by such a conversation, and Shang Jun immediately said to her, "Actually, the three of them got together to take a taxi. It's not about who will send the other, and they live in the same direction."

Both Ziwei and I laughed.Shang Jun's explanation was to show Xiao Yao that this group of friends was just joking with each other, not as chaotic as in the legend.

It's true that the circle is a bit chaotic now, but these few friends of mine are all self-sufficient, at least they are more cautious than me in choosing friends.Of course, part of the reason for their caution is that they are still a little confused about this emotion or have not met someone who can attract them.

"The watch is so straightforward, maybe something will happen to us." Tangtang picked up another piece of fish and put it into his mouth.

Shang Jun teased, "You are a big foodie, just let something happen to you with the food on this table."

"It is said that a person like me who keeps talking is because of a lack of emotion. How about you introduce me to a beautiful woman?" Based on the truth that being able to eat is a blessing, Tangtang will not take Shang Jun's sarcasm seriously , when she spoke, her eyes still stayed on the plates and bowls on the table.

The whole night was spent easily amidst everyone's talking and laughing.

Coming out of the hotel, Ziwei took his girlfriend and left first.The little girl and the three of them took a taxi together and left.My house is not far from here, and I plan to walk back.

Sitting in the driver's seat, Xiao Yao shouted at me, "Get in the car, I'll see you off."

I waved to her, "Let's go, I'll walk back by myself." At this time, Shang Jun must wish to be alone with Xiao Yao, and I don't want to be a disgusting light bulb.

The car stopped beside me, "Come on, it's on the way." Shang Jun rolled down the glass window and stuck his head out.

The moon is so full tonight, I really want to walk alone.In the past year, after many such gatherings, it was Shang Jun who walked home with me.Two people who are also lovelorn talk to each other along the way, time passes quickly, and the journey will not seem long.

Shang Jun looked at me with sympathetic eyes, then waved at Xiao Yao who was in the car, "Let's go, pay attention to safety." She said the last sentence to me.

I don't know if it was because of the alcohol or the two text messages during the day, but seeing the white Ford disappear into the night, I felt a little lost.

I look up at the sky without a single star, and as soon as tonight is over, I will be [-] years old.Those of my classmates who have been married for a long time are married, and their children may be able to play soy sauce.

Some people say that the birthday is to commemorate the suffering day of the mother's birth. In fact, in my opinion, this day is more a time for introspection, reflecting on what I have done in those past days.

As I got closer and closer to home, my heart became heavier.I thought of Xia Jingyi, if I hadn't met her, maybe my life would be different, maybe at this time I was holding my husband and child and going home happily together.

But fate arranged for me to meet her at the age of 18, who is not familiar with the world.Since then, my fate has changed dramatically.