My rival won't let me fall in love early! !

Someone once said that almost all long-suppressed feelings are related to surging love and lust.

This is the case with Yuan Qingzhuo.

At the age of 17, one spring morning, he was awakened by a bad and confusing dream.

Throughout the whole night, Yuan Rong's various moods filled his dream, enthusiastic, proactive, shy, and bold... He watched himself and the young man fly a kite on the grass in the countryside from an omniscient perspective. Running not far away, smiled and waved to him.

"Brother, put it a little higher."

The handle was in Yuan Qingzhuo's hand, and he turned his wrist, circles of white silk threads were entangled and flew into the air, stretched and straightened, the kite flew farther, and Yuan Rong's figure was also in his sight. become very small.

On the green wilderness, the far-reaching sunlight turned into colorful circles of light under the refraction of the air and printed in Yuan Qingzhuo's pupils. He squinted his eyes and watched Yuan Rong drift away, and unconsciously began to draw the thread.

Subconsciously, he wanted Yuan Rong to come back and stand beside him.

The kite wobbled and fell down, and struggled in the grass to swim to Yuan Qingzhuo's feet. The young man came over panting, with a faint blush after exercise on his face, which made his lips red, teeth white, and skin fair.

"Why don't you let go, are you tired?"

Yuan Qingzhuo watched Yuan Rong walk in front of her, as if she wanted to snatch the handle of the kite, so she involuntarily carried it behind her back.

His Adam's apple moved slightly, and he wanted to say something, but when he looked at Uehara Rong's clear, apricot-like eyes, he suddenly felt speechless and completely seen through.

"Why don't you give it to me?" Yuan Rong walked around him, and said after a while, "I see, you must be trying to tease me again, right? Then trick me into kissing you!"

Yuan Qingzhuo watched him rush towards him with his arms open, and reflexively threw away the things in his hands to pick him up. The two teenagers rolled on the ground and hugged each other.

"Rongrong..." Yuan Qingzhuo looked at the boy sitting on him, and his heart beat faster.

There is a wonderful feeling in the chest, if it doesn't roll out of the throat, it will show in the movements, in the expression, in the eyes.

Before Yuan Qingzhuo understood what that meant, Yuan Rong had already kissed him.

It's as if they have done it countless times, or they haven't done it at all, but there is a natural tacit understanding in the subconscious.The lips of the two pressed together, and their breathing quickened. Every cute reaction and detail of Yuan Rong was accurately engraved in Yuan Qingzhuo's mind, and became an inseparable part of his memory.

After kissing to the back, Yuan Rong avoided Yuan Qingzhuo's entanglement, and leaned into his arms clingingly: "Brother."

With just such a word, Yuan Qingzhuo woke up from the dream in an instant.

The sun shone on the floor through the gaps in the curtains, he slowly opened his eyes, and the room was filled with the faint smell of heather.

It is self-evident what this taste represents.

Yuan Qingzhuo hadn't fully woken up from the hazy atmosphere of the dream, he lifted the quilt, saw the protruding shape of the pajama pants and the dark wet marks, his heart was filled with shock and panic, he had lost his dream.

All this is because of Yuanrong.

But that was his favorite younger brother since childhood, how could he have such thoughts about Yuan Rong?

Yuan Qingzhuo covered his forehead with a headache, and as soon as he closed his eyes, the feeling in the dream still filled his heart as if it had happened in real life. This time he realized it more clearly, and his body became restless because of what happened in the dream Uneasy, all the urges gathered somewhere from the limbs.

He did have thoughts about Yuan Rong, and the simple kiss between the two of them in a dream could make his heart surge.

This cognition impacted Yuan Qingzhuo's world view. At this time, he heard the sound of walking outside the door, and turned his head to look at the wall clock on the wall. He was about to be late.

Yuan Qingyan quickly changed out of her pajamas, took out the dried bed sheets from the cabinet, and then went to the bathroom to wash up.

He was absent-minded all morning, and he was not in a good mood when he was eating breakfast. Yuan Rong came downstairs with his schoolbag on his back, and when he saw him, he took the initiative to say hello: "Brother!"

This time, Yuan Qingzhuo did not smile at him as usual, but glanced at him lightly, without speaking.

Yuan Rong was still wearing the sea-blue school uniform of junior high school. He is only fifteen or sixteen years old now, at the age of rapid growth, and the school uniform and trousers don't fit well anymore, and his slender and beautiful ankles can be vaguely seen when he walks around.

"What's the matter, you didn't pay attention to me when you got up late today," Yuan Rong asked strangely, "Did you not sleep well last night?"

Thanks to his younger brother, Yuan Qingzhuo really didn't sleep well.

He didn't speak, just sat at the table and ate breakfast mechanically, and then said: "Go, go to school."

After moving to a new home, they still took the bus to go to school together, but the original father and original mother gave them a lot of pocket money, and told them to take a taxi if they had no time, and not to save money deliberately.

For example, this morning, if you don't take a taxi, it will be too late for class, Yuan Rong looked at Yuan Qingzhuo who was not in a hurry, and anxiously pulled his arm: "Let's go quickly, we will be nagged by our class monitor again if we are late. "

Yuan Qingzhuo glanced at the young man holding his hand, holding it tentatively, Yuan Rong looked at him hesitantly: "What's wrong?"

"It's nothing."

Yuan Qingzhuo let go of him and smiled, "Let's go."

From that day on he was extra focused on his sexuality/needs.It’s not that he didn’t watch the film under the instigation of friends of the same age when he was in junior high school, but he felt that he didn’t have any sense of substitution at the time, and he wasn’t keen on it.

Later, Yuan Qingzhuo watched some more, and at night, the protagonist of those naked scenes was replaced by Yuan Rong's face, which played in his dreams over and over again.

The person who weighed on Yuan Rong was himself.

Yuan Qingzhuo couldn't accept it, he even had a kind of unexplainable anger, he couldn't convince himself that he was gay, and even suspected that he was abnormal.

He used to search for answers through various possible channels irritably. Some people said that having a physical impulse towards the same sex is a normal phenomenon in adolescence, so don't worry too much.

But he was no longer as simple as being impulsive towards Yuan Rong.Before he realized these emotions that transcended boundaries, he did many things to control and possess Yuan Rong invisibly.

For example, to kill the signs of his falling in love, he is not allowed to get too close to any boy or girl, he hopes that Yuan Rong will always have only himself in his eyes, and he will be worshiped, obsessed, and unable to extricate himself.

For this reason, Yuan Qingzhuo has also been maintaining his own image. He hides hunger, thirst, loneliness, and darkness, and behaves tenderly and considerately.

It turned out that there was a reason for all of this, he had fallen in love with Yuan Rong a long time ago.

After clearly realizing this incident, Yuan Qingzhuo tried to alienate his younger brother.He wanted to calm himself down, what if a moderate sense of distance could bring him back to normal?

Gradually, the relationship between the two brothers was not as good as before, Yuan Qingzhuo tasted the pain of secret love for the first time in his life.

Since he was a child, he has many suitors around him. He has been confessed many times. He also feels that he has to tell someone he likes and let the other person know. Only after trying will he know the result. Pity.

But he is humbler than any crush in this world, he has no way and no right to tell Yuan Rong how much he likes him, because they are brothers.

This hot emotion is constantly brewing in the heart, forming a hot and strong love. On the surface, Yuan Qing is calm and calm, but in fact his heart has collapsed and lost his balance.

However, Yuan Rong didn't know anything yet, and he never thought about it. His unconscious intimacy and dependence made Yuan Qingzhuo feel annoyed and tortured, but seeing his younger brother, he couldn't confess.

Homosexuality... will the average person accept it?Even he himself can't accept it.If you tell Yuan Rong frankly, wouldn't it just add to his troubles?

Both of them are still underage, and neither of them can decide what kind of person they will go with in the future.

Reason told Yuan Qingzhuo this way, but emotion made him struggle on the verge of losing control again and again.After his love for his younger brother turned sour, he couldn't control his emotions and was afraid that he would hurt Yuan Rong.

Yuan Rong hasn't grown up yet, so he can't accept him now.

Unknowingly tried all the methods, Yuan Qingzhuo even made Yuan Rong take the initiative to hate herself and stay away from herself.

This trick was very effective, and they each became more rational and objective. After attending the same high school, they gradually matured again.The only thing that made Yuan Qingzhuo extremely dissatisfied was Yuan Rong's frowning eyebrows and the indifference he deliberately avoided every time he saw him.

During the two years when their relationship was inflexible, as they grew older, Yuan Qingzhuo found, paradoxically, that he could not accept the consequences.It only takes a little trick to make him loathe him so much, did Yuan Rong really admire him so much in the past?

The little boy who once pulled him and said that he would live with his brother for the rest of his life has now turned into a tall, beautiful boy who repelled him. It is undeniable that no matter what he looks like, he can evoke the most primitive part of Yuan Qingzhuo's heart. Possess / desire.

Love that has been suppressed for many years will deteriorate in the dark time.

This secret love has developed to the last stage, Yuan Qingzhuo's heart has completely moved to the extreme/extreme of change.

He didn't want to let go of every expression of Yuan Rong, he liked the way Yuan Rong was angry with him, he liked the way he was angry, even the clever expression during the quarrel caught Yuan Qing's heart.

If you like it, you will feel it, and you will care about it crazily, trying to cut off every possible escape route for him, and appreciate his helpless and gnashing of teeth.

The younger brother no longer has a good impression of him, and Yuan Qingzhuo wantonly connives and exposes his nature.At this moment, he doesn't want to let go anymore, even if Yuan Rong hates him and hates him, don't leave him again, if anyone dares to separate them, Yuan Qingzhuo will get rid of these threats at all costs.

More than ten years ago, the day when Yuan's parents confirmed their relationship and the two disintegrated families officially met, coincided with Xiao Yuanrong's birthday.Dad Yuan cheerfully rode his bicycle to a nearby farmer's market to buy a small bag of Chinese toon seeds.

It is said that he wanted to buy banyan tree species, but unfortunately he couldn't find it, so he chose Chinese toon by mistake.

The original father and the original mother sowed the seeds in the open space downstairs of their two-bedroom apartment. After a few years, the Chinese toon tree was full of vitality and grew rapidly. When spring came, the residents in the community could share a handful of fresh and tender Chinese toon. The sprouts are taken home for stir-frying.

The banyan tree is thriving like the little Chinese toon tree, and the rings of growth rings grow in Yuan Qingzhuo's heart. With the cycle of spring, summer, autumn and winter, they have become an inseparable whole with his heart.

If that person is Yuan Rong, he is willing to give him, give him the loyalty of a person who has never had faith.

The author has something to say:

Author: Yuan Qingzhuo Reflect on why you and your younger brother's memory killing style is not the same at all!

Thanks to Boss Gogo for throwing a mine!

Thanks for the 10 bottles of nutrient solution irrigated by the genius boss!