Schoolboy becomes boyfriend

After the National Day holiday, everything is back on track.Jiang Zhixu also had time to take Song Enyu to and from school. Song Enyu returned to school and had to meet the next monthly exam.

This is the case in the third year of senior high school. From teachers to students, they will gradually enter the state with monthly exams and mock exams. It is a competition among the crowd and a challenge for themselves.However, key middle schools like the High School Affiliated to Shanghai University do not inculcate the idea of ​​"thousands of troops crossing a single-plank bridge". Most of them have already opened the door to success in the college entrance examination.All that is waiting is a result.

In such a tense and relaxed atmosphere, Song Enyu refocused on his studies and exams.On the weekends, I will ask Weng Yaxin to go to save pictures and study.

As a result, Jiang Zhixu became the target of being "in the cold".In Song Enyu's heart, there is more or less the feeling that "love and studies cannot have both".

Ordinary days are indeed like white water, tasteless is not the feeling that love should have, but it is indeed the original taste of life.

In this way, after the autumn is getting colder, the time is marked in the white winter.

In winter, it is as white as snow.It was also in this winter that Lin Xiaozhou left and died the day before Christmas.

Weng Yaxin didn't come to school for a week, Song Enyu was worried.I called several times, but I could only hear Weng Yaxin's downcast voice, answering without a word, and hung up the phone after a while.

It wasn't until this Friday that he and his roommates were having dinner in the cafeteria that he heard the people in line behind say, "Hey~, do you know that Lin Xiaozhou from Guanghua Middle School?"

"I know, the girl from the improvement class in our school before!"

"That's right! It's her. I heard that she passed away yesterday."

"Gone? What do you mean?"

"No, it's dead."

These words were like a thorn in Song Enyu's heart, and the moment he let go of the plate, the empty plate fell to the ground, and the crisp and piercing sound caught everyone's attention.He hugged and apologized in embarrassment, bent down to pick it up, and went to wash the sink by himself, absent-mindedly, thinking about the words he just heard.

Song Enyu finished washing the dishes, said "something" to his roommate, hurriedly left and ran back to the dormitory, and took out his mobile phone to call Weng Yaxin.It took several calls in a row before the other party picked up.

With a thick nasal and crying voice, he greeted Song Enyu.Song Enyu was concerned: "Ya Xin, are you okay?"

Weng Yaxin hadn't closed her eyes from yesterday until now, as if her soul was withdrawn at this moment, when she heard Song Enyu's familiar voice, she finally couldn't restrain her sadness, found a place where no one was around, squatted down and cried loudly.

Song Enyu didn't speak anymore, just kept talking on the phone and listening to Weng Ya's heartache.He knew that saying anything now would not be consoling, only companionship.

Soon the news spread in the school, and all kinds of rumors spread, all on the basis of satisfying each other's curiosity, and then a little sympathy, and finally the next one: it's too miserable, we can't come to such a conclusion.

Hearing these words, Song Enyu became extremely irritable.He called Jiang Zhixu early in the morning, and after class ended at [-]:[-] in the evening, he took a leave of absence from the teacher and did not go to evening self-study.Then he left in a hurry, he also needed a quiet environment.

Jiang Zhixu looked at him with a solemn expression: "What's wrong? Did something unpleasant happen today?"

Song Enyu fastened his seat belt and didn't answer. He looked blankly at the street trees on the side of the road, and then he was shocked: It turned out that it was really winter.

It is a winter with only dead branches and leaves left, bleak cold wind, and no vitality anymore.

Jiang Zhixu asked again: "Today is Christmas, where do you want to go shopping?"

Song Enyu shook his head: "Go home!"

Jiang Zhixu didn't answer the phone anymore, and led him back to Tianyi Garden.Even though Song Enyu didn't plan to go out with Jiang Zhixu for the festival, he was a person who paid attention to the sense of ceremony after all. After returning home, he put on an apron and started busy preparing tonight's dinner in the kitchen.

Song Enyu threw his schoolbag on the sofa as soon as he got home, and fell backwards into the softness.He began to stare intently at the crystal chandelier hanging high above, shining like stars, falling into Song Enyu's eyes one by one.

Aware that Jiang Zhixu was busy, he reminded: "I can't eat, you can eat."

Jiang Zhixu slowed down as he cut the steak. He said, "No matter what happens, you have to eat. It will be ready in a while, and I will call you."

He is used to asking all questions only once, and he will never ask the second time if he ensures that the other party can hear clearly.Because if the other party wants to talk, they will tell themselves the answer.

The tacit understanding of living together in the past six months, Song Enyu also knows what Jiang Zhixu's principles are.He didn't refuse the second time. He waited for the meal to be ready, took two casual bites, picked up his schoolbag and went back to the house.

In the evening, Jiang Zhixu had a conference call. Seeing that the time was coming, he had to pack the dining table and go back to the study for the meeting.

The two of them would not bother each other until late at night.After Jiang Zhixu finished the meeting, he thought that Song Enyu would still maintain his previous habit of memorizing comprehensive essays for half an hour and English for half an hour before going to bed.Today, for the first time ever, I took a shower and lay down under the quilt.

When Jiang Zhixu changed into his nightgown and came back from the shower, he saw Song Enyu facing up to the sky. Under the warm light, there was a hazy golden light. Those clear eyes were like glass, but unfortunately they were broken...

Jiang Zhixu understood his sadness from such eyes.He lay on one side as usual, and looked up at the ceiling with Song Enyu. He knew that Song Enyu must have something to say.

"Lin Xiaozhou died. Depression, depression committed suicide." Song Enyu said sadly.

The only intersection between him and Lin Xiaozhou was at the birthday party, and most of the time he heard about it from Weng Yaxin.But at this moment, he was inexplicably uncomfortable, wanting to cry for no reason.Maybe I just feel sorry for the loss of such a vivid life, or maybe as a peer, I can't help but empathize.

If life is the four seasons, then the years of life are the scorching spring day when the green branches are full and the flowers are in full bloom.But some people stay in this season forever.

Jiang Zhixu asked calmly, "When did it happen?"

"Yesterday." Song Enyu smiled wryly, "Sarcasm? He died the day before Christmas."

The warm and soft light was no longer gentle, Song Enyu felt it was dazzling, it hurt his eyes so much that he couldn't help crying.

"Jesus was crucified, and Easter will be in a few days. God has Easter, but when is Easter for us mortals?" Song Enyu choked with sobs at the end. This was the first time he felt so far away from death. close.He was too young when his father left.In other words, I was immature at the time and didn't understand life and death.As the years went by, he gradually discovered that people really cannot escape time and fate.Life and death are the knowledge of a lifetime, so where is Easter for us mortals?

Jiang Zhixu turned sideways and reached out to wipe Song Enyu's tears from a distance.He said softly: "In the heart of the living."

Song Enyu turned his head and looked at him blankly, only to hear Jiang Zhixu's serious explanation: "This is the truth that I gradually understood after so many years after my mother passed away. As long as I still miss her, she will always live in my heart. So we There is also Easter, Xiaoyu, what we are sad about is the departure of relatives and friends, we will never feel their warmth again, and those good memories come to an abrupt end. But this is not death.”

Song Enyu heard Jiang Zhixu mention his mother for the first time. He didn't know that the mother who taught Jiang Zhixu to be kind and loving had already left.Enduring the grief that was clogged in his chest, he went to shake Jiang Zhixu's hand.

The other party smiled and said, "I'm fine!" He suddenly felt a pulsation in his wrist, which was a comfort from one life to another.

"Hawking, that is, Chen Ning and I mentioned in Chen Ning's letter that he and I respect the most seniors. Chen Ning and I did not study physics, but we all admire him. I really want to believe in the connection between the stars and the soul. He would say that the universe has meaning only because of the people we love. This is the first time I feel the temperature of physics. This sentence has been with me through the most depressing time after my mother died. Therefore, death The love that cannot be taken away is the proof of life. Xiaoyu, those who have left, we just remember them and live strong.”

After saying these words, Song Enyu had already burst into tears.The two chatted until early in the morning before Song Enyu fell asleep.It wasn't until he woke up the next day that his eyes hurt so badly that he couldn't open them anymore, that Jiang Zhixu asked for leave for him.

I only rested at home for one day, and the next day was the day of Lin Xiaozhou's funeral.At his request, Jiang Zhixu sent the person to the funeral home early in the morning. He was very worried about Weng Yaxin.

On the way to the funeral, just as I got on the viaduct, there was a light snow on the road ahead. This was the first snow this winter.

Song Enyu lowered the car window and let the snowflakes fall in the wind.When it landed on his arm, the icy touch made him sigh: "Our classmates all thought that the first snow would fall on Christmas, but it probably had a sense of human nature early on, so it came here specially to give it away today."

Jiang Zhixu didn't answer, just walked with Fengxue all the way, and sent him to the funeral home.As soon as I entered the farewell hall, I saw Weng Yaxin sitting in the front row in black.He walked straight over, and in just a few days, he became extremely thin.She no longer cried bitterly, she just sat indifferently, listening to the photo hanging in the middle of the farewell hall.

Song Enyu patted her on the shoulder, and the other party tried hard to force a smile.Then his eyes filled with tears instantly.Weng Yaxin said with a smile: "Look, Xiao Zhou smiled so happily. When she left, she must have been happy!"

"Ya Xin, even if the yin and yang are separated, her feelings for you will not change. She must hope that you can cheer up and be strong, just like the optimistic and cheerful Weng Yaxin before."

Same, yet different.The pain of parting from life and death cannot be soothed by any words. It needs to be startled again and again in the middle of the night and cry bitterly. It needs to smash memories and pick them up again. It became a fixed piece of paper.

The farewell ceremony was very simple, and Song Enyu finally saw Lin Xiaozhou's mother. She was helped to the stage by someone, her body swayed, and it became difficult to stand still.Even holding the microphone, the voice is still low and inaudible.Song Enyu was sitting in the first row, and he could clearly see that the mother was shaking all over.

If given another chance, she would definitely choose to love her daughter well.Song Enyu thinks this way, he likes to arrange a good ending for some unsatisfactory things in his nature.

After the ceremony, those who came to the funeral walked to the Xishan cemetery, holding flowers in their hands and saying goodbye to Lin Xiaozhou.Everyone held white roses in their hands, and the whiteness of the roses melted into the snow.Lin Xiaozhou liked white roses the most during his lifetime.Only Weng Ya held a bunch of sunflowers in her heart.

After the last person presented flowers, I heard Lin's mother crying and wailing. This powerful woman in Shanghai's business circle was kneeling at this moment in front of Lin Xiaozhou's tombstone, stroking her trembling hands over and over again. Looking at the photo, and the name "Lin Xiaozhou".She became a mother, at this moment.

Weng Yaxin didn't step forward to join the ranks of dragging Lin Mu, but turned around and walked down the mountain.Song Enyu followed behind her.Weng Yaxin stopped in an open space in the cemetery, looking into the distance.

Started to tell Song Enyu about the last few days of Lin Xiaozhou's life:

"I asked for a week's leave. At that time, Xiaozhou couldn't live without people. Her mother paid for a nanny, which only made Xiaozhou more and more restless. Later, when I came to her, her condition gradually improved. got better."

Weng Yaxin looked back at Song Enyu with a wry smile, "At that time I naively thought that as long as I was here, Xiaozhou would definitely get better. She actively cooperated with the treatment and was willing to open the curtains in the bedroom to let the sunlight in. We also started chatting about some entertainment gossip. Strange news, she always smiles happily in front of me, the same as before. But I didn't know that she had thought of dying at that time."

Weng Yaxin sobbed, unable to speak any more.She thought of the days when she and Xiaozhou spent the last day and night together, the girl smiled hard to herself, her dimples were still full of honey, so sweet.

Song Enyu finally walked over and put his arms around her shoulders, gently hugging her in his arms.A hug is powerful enough encouragement.

Weng Yaxin adjusted her emotions and continued: "Later, the night before Christmas, Xiaozhou and I went to spend Christmas Eve, we came back from watching the movie together, and she suggested that tomorrow is Christmas, and she wanted me to buy a bunch of Flowers for her. I thought she wanted her favorite white roses, but Xiaozhou said she wanted sunflowers, the more sunflowers the better. I promised her and went out to buy them.”

She raised her tears and said to Song Enyu: "I really hate being stupid, and I'm so stupid! Why did I leave at that time, why didn't I take her with me. It's really my fault, En Yu, it's really my fault!"

Song Enyu kept comforting her along the back: "It's not your fault, Xiaozhou definitely doesn't want you to see her despair in the end."

Weng Yaxin continued to recall that night, they arranged the house together, the Christmas tree was wrapped with stars and lights, and the windows were covered with Christmas stickers.

"When I went back after buying flowers, Xiaozhou, Xiaozhou had already left. The blood flowing from my wrist stained the white carpet red. It was newly bought by me and her and laid on the floor. She said that she wanted to live in such soft and white I spent this Christmas here. I walked over to see, Xiaozhou had a smile on his face, and at that moment I felt that the sky was falling."

Weng Yaxin entered the door, holding a large bunch of sunflowers, just walked into the living room, and saw such a scene.On this very night, someone must have heard a girl's heart-rending cries, begging for someone to come and save her friend, her best girl.

Jiang Zhixu was watching from a distance, watching the helpless struggle of the desperate man.Naturally, he was on the list invited today, as Lin Xiaozhou's mother's partner.The snow was getting heavier and heavier. He worried that the two people who had been frozen in the snow would catch a cold, so he walked over with an umbrella...

After sending Weng Yaxin home first, Jiang Zhixu and Song Enyu returned to Tianyi Garden together.Song Enyu was thinking about the last thing Weng Yaxin said to himself along the way:

There are a few pieces of letter paper on the coffee table. It is not a suicide note, but a pure and innocent friendship between a girl and another girl.

"Ya Xin, when you read this letter, I must be gone. This letter is for you, and only this little trace is left for you, leaving the most beautiful sunshine in my life—"

As she read, Weng Yaxin's tears had already stained the handwriting. She tried to wipe away her tears and saw Lin Xiaozhou's last words: "Don't feel sorry for me, my friend. It is a relief for me to leave. I am very glad that God will When my most precious things were taken away one by one, I still kept you. So many sunflowers were given to you, because those flowers are me. At the end of my life, I really worked hard to grow towards the sun. It's a pity that I can't get out of this darkness. I just want to thank you, thank you for shining on my dim life like sunshine. Yaxin, in the next life, let's be sisters and let me love you."

Don't compare girls to flowers, because most flowers really only bloom for one season.

--------------------

The author has something to say:

Thanks for reading the text.