I don't have ulterior motives

Jin Beidao pointed to the entrance of the alley.

After he withdrew the knife, the other party returned to his nonchalant attitude, brushed off his clothes, walked towards the entrance of the alley, waved to the people waiting there, and those people followed him and left.

This person seems to be acting.Jin Bei thought.

After the other party left, Shu Linan's rationality and calmness of forcing himself to spin in a blank corner of his brain was finally able to stop.He knelt down to pick up his schoolbag, but felt dizzy for a while.

Jin Yunsheng came over. "What's going on?" He looked at the two teenagers.Jin Bei didn't look at him or answer, but stared at the wall and asked, "What happened four years ago?"

Jin Yunsheng was stunned for a moment, and Jin Bei turned his gaze: "You knew the cause of their death, but you didn't tell me."

There was a slight doubt in his tone, it seemed that it was not an accusation, but an inquiry about the truth.

"I..." Jin Yunsheng stretched out his hand and put it down again.The boy in front of him was already about the same height as him, and he was no longer able to touch the top of his head with a slight raise of his hand.

"What's going on?" Jin Bei lowered his voice, he wanted to know the facts, but he didn't want to know the relationship between the facts and the person in front of him.

Jin Yunsheng took a deep breath and raised his head sharply.The sky in the alley narrowed into a line, as if after he walked up, there would be no more fields and forked roads in life.There is only a narrow line of sky.

"At that time, there was a dispute between Ke Tanmeng's business and people from Province J, and we caught an insider. That person was supposed to be dealt with that day.

"I and a few other people brought the inner ghost to our place at night. We didn't intend to kill him at that time, because we wanted to get information about the other party from him. I didn't know that your father followed me at that time.

"The hopeful at the alley," he paused, "it's the same as today.

"The watchman is in the car. He hit your father with his car." Jin Yunsheng lowered his gaze.

Jin Bei listened in silence, raised his head when he heard this, he wanted to ask something, his Adam's apple twitched and gave up, shaking his head to signal Jin Yunsheng to continue.

"I heard the sound and went out," he swallowed, "but that person, he drove away immediately. I haven't contacted him since then."

Jin Yunsheng didn't continue.Jin Bei looked up at him: "Where's my mother?"

"..."

"What about her?"

"She was also killed by that person."

Jin Bei nodded in a daze: "Why didn't you kill me?"

"..."

He looked behind Jin Yunsheng, the outside world shrunk into a radiating white spot, wandering in the alley.

"You never found him?"

Jin Yunsheng smiled bitterly: "Not before, but he died a few days ago."

Jin Bei withdrew his gaze and stared at him sharply.

"Huang Xiaotian. You may know."

Shu Lin'an raised his head suddenly: "The person who killed him..."

"It's me." Jin Yunsheng said blankly.

Shu Lin'an really wanted to ask him about Huang Xiaotian and Shu Pingyuan, but he glanced at Jin Bei, but he didn't speak.

Jin Yunsheng explained unconsciously: "I didn't know there was something wrong with what happened that day. Huang Xiaotian didn't do what Ke Tanmeng ordered. There are other people behind him, but I haven't found out yet. It should be related to the incidents of these few times. The case matters too."

The one who keeps feeding whistleblowing material.Shu Lin'an thought.If so, was that a plan that started four years ago?

"You still need to keep checking, don't you?" Jin Bei said slowly.

Jin Yunsheng looked at Jin Bei and nodded.

"I can do it too."

Jin Yunsheng was silent for a long time, he hesitated and said, "I know I'm not qualified to say that, you should hate me..."

Jin Bei interrupted him: "That's meaningless."

"You should have known this day from the beginning. If you choose that path, you should know what the end will be like."

"I have long...understood."

Even if you understand it, it doesn't make sense.

Jin Yunsheng raised his head.There is really only a thin line of sky in this alley, it was four years ago, and it is still now.

He finally put his hand on Jin Bei's shoulder lightly, just like what they saw on campus just now.Or how many years ago Jin Bei left elementary school, got out of class in the martial arts gym, and ran home.

"I will...not go to your house."

Jin Bei didn't answer, so Jin Yunsheng turned around.He turned around, waved his hands and stepped towards the white light at the entrance of the alley, and then disappeared into the dimmed light.

Jin Bei lowered his head and crushed the calluses on his fingertips.It was left when Jin Yunsheng taught him how to swing a sword.

Shu Lin'an leaned against the wall, looking at the direction where Jin Yunsheng was leaving, and Jin Bei covered half of the back of the white light.

Jin Bei turned his head and gave him a forced smile: "Go back."

Seeing his smile, Shu Lin'an wanted to soothe his frowning brows.

"I'll go buy something for dinner." Shu Lin'an said at the gate of the community.

Jin Bei was taken aback for a moment, then nodded.

"Then...you go back first?"

"Let's go together."

He was still walking beside him, without turning or turning.

Shu Linan pinched his palm.He was already used to the company around him, if that place suddenly became vacant...he couldn't imagine it.

Shu Lin'an thought in a trance, that's how people are, if they stay in hell all the time, they won't feel anything after getting used to it, but if they have been there, even if they have seen the heaven, they won't dare to think about the appearance of being lost again.

After dinner, Shu Linan collected the dishes and carried them to the kitchen, trying to put them in the sink.

"Don't wash it, leave it alone." He saw Jin Bei saying in the restaurant.

When the bottom of the plate hit the table, there was a crisp sound, and Shu Lin'an suddenly had a sore nose.

Sitting at the dining table, Jin Bei heard the other party come out, without looking up, he said softly, "I'm fine."

Shu Lin'an stood across the table, hesitated for a while, and said in a softer voice than the other party: "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize."

Jin Bei looked up at him.

"Don't comfort me."

Shu Lin'an stood there in a daze.Jin Bei's eyelids drooped, casting shadows under his eyes.

After a long time, Shu Lin'an said after deliberating, "If you don't want to see me..."

Jin Bei suddenly raised his head and grabbed his hand, Shu Linan was startled.

Jin Bei looked at him, didn't say anything, but tugged at his hand.Shu Linan's heart softened, and he walked over and sat next to him.

"So in this world, some people kill casually, and some people are killed for no reason? That's it?"

Shu Linan frowned: "No."

"Then why?" Jin Bei looked at him.

Shu Linan shook his head.How did he know.If the question just now was his real thought, he would nod.He has seen people who treat other people's lives like ants, and he has seen ants who died on the road just because of bad luck.When he was young and looked around in a daze, Shu Pingyuan stretched out his hand in front of him and led him into that world where there was no mercy and the winner was king.He has long been used to such values, and occasionally feels that he conflicts with something in his heart, but he quickly returns to indifference.

So there is no one else in his world, only himself.Others are just wood to burn, or metal to polish, or useless plastic waste, or dangerous objects to avoid during a long winter night.

His life was that winter night.

Shu Lin'an was suddenly afraid of what he would do, why did he think he would not hurt the other party?

Jin Bei believes in him so much, if he hurts him sometime in the future, or it won't be him, but someone else, but that is against the other party's values, then the other party will question him like this , and what should he say?

He would rather stay away from him, at least so that he would not know what he was doing, so that he would not be involved in the world that did exist.

At least get him off the edge of that winter night.

Shu Lin'an rubbed Jin Bei's jaw line with his knuckles with infinite nostalgia, and tried his best to keep his tone steady: "Really. I'm here, if, if you feel uncomfortable..."

Jin Bei asked in surprise, "Why?"

Shu Linan opened his mouth.His long, curled eyelashes fluttered slightly.

"Don't you blame me?"

Jin Bei opened his eyes wide.He wanted to kill the murderer, he hated Shu Pingyuan and Ke Tanmeng, and he had ambivalent feelings towards Jin Yunsheng.

But he never thought of blaming his Lin'an.

Shu Lin'an didn't wait for the other party's answer, bit her lip, and hid her tears behind her eyelids.

When he stopped smiling at himself, Jin Bei realized how much he liked his smiling eyes.Like a crescent.There is a slight dimple on the right cheek.The curvature of the lip line is extremely tense, making people want to kiss it.

Jin Bei thought about it, and then practiced it.

That shallow crescent moon.

It's as cool as moonlight.

Shu Lin'an didn't respond, but she didn't stop him either, allowing him to kiss her.

Lin'an, Lin'an, he never rejected himself.

Jin Bei left him and looked at his eyes, nose, and lips.

"You want to be with me, don't you?"

Shu Lin'an looked at him for a long time, and blinked slowly: "In some places, that person is right. I am such a person. I arrange resources that can be used for profit, and treat other people as resources , sort them, label them as waste, reusable, recyclable, etc., and send them a little kindness, like carefully storing resources and sending them to the furnace in the winter."

Jin Bei listened silently, and when Shu Linan finished speaking, his expression remained unchanged, and he asked, "You want to be with me, don't you?"

Shu Linan swallowed.

Jin Bei continued to look at him: "I hope that I am the most useful resource for you, so that you will save me until the end of winter."

"You're different." Shu Lin'an raised his head abruptly, and the light-colored eyes that were originally covered by eyelashes looked at him, like a pond with new spring grass.

"Then what can I be?"

"..."

"You are the end of winter." Shu Lin'an said without blinking his eyes, silently shedding tears.

Jin Bei was stunned, and wiped away the tears that flowed to his lips.

Shu Linan covered her cheek with one hand.

Sure enough, it can't be done.he thinks.As long as he looked at the other person, the idea of ​​losing such a thought became a knife and axe, scratched in his heart, and pulled out fresh flesh and blood.

He crouched down and hugged his knees.

Before Jin Bei could recover, Shu Lin'an knelt down on the ground and hugged him.

"Don't want me..."

"Lin'an?" Jin Bei wanted to squat down, but his legs were tightly hugged. He went to break Shu Lin'an's hand, but the other party clasped it even tighter.

Jin Bei rubbed his head, it felt like a fluffy animal.He finally squatted down, sat next to the little animal, and patted him on the back: "Why don't you want to?"

"It doesn't matter if you lock me up."

What are you talking about...

Shu Linan's voice was very low, almost raving.

"You're right. I like you. Only you."

"I want to be with you."

"I just want to be with you."

"……me too."

The author has something to say:

Shu Lin'an: It doesn't matter if you lock me up.

Jin Bei: Good.Close my heart.

Shu Lin'an: //////