I still want to pretend after falling off the horse

"It should be memory disorder caused by traumatic brain injury. But he still has basic common sense of life, can speak and write, relatively speaking, the problem is not big." The doctor said after the examination.

Shang Yuan asked: "How long will this situation last?"

"It's hard to say, it may be a day, it may be a month, it depends on the actual situation of the patient. My suggestion is to observe for a few days first, understand his memory through dialogue, and guide him to recall the fragments of his life. Help restore memory."

After the doctor left, Shang Yuan pushed the door open and entered the ward, Yang Yixin was looking out the window blankly, his heart tightened with that uneasy look.

Hearing the sound, Yang Yixin turned his head, hurriedly helped Shang Yuan to sit on the bed, and asked, "What happened? Why did you get into a car accident and get hurt so badly? What did the doctor say?"

"I'm fine, don't worry." Shang Yuan recalled what the doctor said, and tentatively asked, "Do you... remember what happened yesterday?"

"Yesterday?" Yang Yixin frowned suspiciously, "Is there anything special about yesterday? I just copied a few questions from you and was scolded by Teacher Jing."

Shang Yuan immediately understood that Yang Yixin's memory was probably still in high school, so he continued to ask, "How many days are left before the college entrance examination?"

"Eighty days." Yang Yixin blurted out, seeming to care about every day of the countdown to the college entrance examination.As he said that, he suddenly froze for a moment, looked out the window and said, "It's almost April, why is it snowing outside?"

When Shang Yuan entered the door, he was looking out, feeling a sense of disobedience in his heart, and only now did he finally understand what was disobedient—how could it snow in April?

Shang Yuan also looked out the window. It was November, and there was light snow in Shangxuan. He looked at Yang Yixin again, and saw that his brows were getting tighter and tighter, and his heart became tense for no reason. For some reason, he didn't explain it to him immediately, but It said: "It's cold in the spring, the temperature suddenly dropped last night."

Yang Yixin let out an "oh", and the doubts in his heart disappeared immediately.He turned his attention to Shang Yuan again, and continued his original topic: "You haven't told me how you got into a car accident. Is your arm broken? Is there any other injury?"

While speaking, Yang Yixin tore off his hospital gown, his eyes hurt from the layers of bandages on his chest, and he wanted to touch it but dared not.

Shang Yuan lied: "I didn't pay attention when I was crossing the road, and I was hit by a car. It's okay, the injury is not serious."

Even though he said so, Yang Yixin still felt distressed, gnashing his teeth and said: "Where's the driver who caused the accident? Have you caught him?"

"Caught."

"That's good."

Shang Yuan saw him baring his teeth ferociously, his expression was vivid and cute, he couldn't help pinching his face.

Yang Yixin didn't hide, leaned over to pinch him, and asked, "Does it feel good?"

Shang Yuan: "Average, too thin, almost meaningless."

If it weren't for Shang Yuan's injuries, Yang Yixin would definitely pinch him back with one paw.At this time, the eyeballs rolled, and he leaned over to kiss his chin, and said obediently: "Then I will eat more, and I will squeeze it for you when I gain weight."

Shang Yuan was taken aback by these cute words, and then lowered his head to kiss him, but Yang Yixin blocked his face and said slyly: "I'll kiss you when I gain weight."

"What does this have to do with being fat or not?"

"Fater tastes better."

"..."

Shang Yuan really wanted to bite him, but his heart felt unspeakably sour.

The old Yang Yixin came back and appeared in front of him in real life. After searching for so many years of memories, the dream he wanted to catch suddenly became reality, but he was not happy at all.

You may even feel heartache, unbearable sadness and self-blame.

Relying on the fact that he could move with one more hand than him, Yang Yixin pushed him to lie down on the hospital bed, covered him with a quilt, and insisted on letting him take a nap to show that it would be beneficial for his recovery.

Under Yang Yixin's expectant gaze, Shang Yuan closed his eyes.But he didn't sleep, couldn't sleep.

Even with his eyes closed, Shang Yuan still felt that Yang Yixin's gaze fell on him. After a while, he climbed onto the bed cautiously, nestled beside him, and held his hand.Actions are full of dependencies.

"Shang Yuan, are you asleep?" Yang Yixin asked quietly.

Shang Yuan didn't answer.

Yang Yixin's movements gradually became bolder, reaching into the quilt, gently stroking the bandages on his body, and whispering: "Don't have any accidents, I'm afraid."

He was really scared, obviously yesterday he was fine, went to class together, went to and from school together, and gave each other a goodnight kiss before going to bed, today Shang Yuan was suddenly injured like this, lying in the hospital with injuries all over his body, while he Don't even know what happened.

In fact, he himself had injuries all over his body, but they were not serious. Most of them were bruises and skin trauma, but he thought it was normal.Because in his memory, he had already been in a car accident, and it's normal to be a little bit injured.He just couldn't accept that something happened to Shang Yuan, and the thought of it made him flustered.

Shang Yuan was so soft that he turned over and put Yang Yixin in his arms, giving him a sense of security in this way.

However, Yang Yixin pulled out his arm and hugged Shang Yuan into his arms, expressing with a small movement that he would also protect him.

The embracing posture made it easy to relax, and Yang Yixin fell asleep without knowing it.So Shang Yuan opened his eyes, fixed his eyes on his sleeping face, looked at this face carefully, and kissed his trembling eyelashes in sleep.

He was both happy and a little apprehensive.

The happy thing is that Yang Yixin woke up and is still alive.What is terrifying is that Yang Yixin has lost his memory and all the evil deeds he has done, but he doesn't know how to face his innocence and love.

He thought that he probably did not deserve such love.Having hurt him so many times, the rifts will never be healed.

Shang Yuan had mixed feelings in his heart, and only he could taste the bitter taste.

When Gu Youguang came over in the afternoon, he saw two people hugging and sleeping on the bed.

Just when Shang Yuan raised his eyes, the eyes of the two met, both with subtle displeasure.

What Gu Youguang thought was: Yang Yixin was still in a coma, Shang Yuan would do such nasty things, shameless!

What Shang Yuan thought was: Didn't this person come here yesterday?Why come every day?bother!

Yang Yixin took a light nap, and woke up when he heard the movement, but his head was still dazed. He turned over on the bed, squinting his eyes and thinking whether to continue sleeping or get up.

Seeing that Yang Yixin was about to wake up, Shang Yuan got up lightly, pulled Gu Youguang outside the ward, and told about Yang Yixin's current situation.

After a while, two people came in, and Yang Yixin was completely awake, sitting cross-legged on the bed and yawning, with a tuft of hair on his head, looking dazed.

Gu Youguang glanced at Shang Yuan suspiciously, while doubting the authenticity of what he just said, he said to Yang Yixin: "Yixin, when did you wake up? How do you feel?"

Yang Yixin stared at him with wide eyes for several seconds, and finally said, "Who are you?"

"I'm your brother, remember?" Gu Youguang sat down next to him without giving up, and said, "Gu Youguang, Three Shadows Troupe."

Yang Yixin didn't say anything, and secretly looked at Shang Yuan with a dazed expression, hoping that he could tell him what was going on.

Gu Youguang blocked his gaze for help, and said, "Yang Yixin, I know you are good at acting, so stop acting. Don't forget, I am not only your brother, but also your master. I have already seen through your pranks!"

Seeing that he was still the same as before, Gu Youguang couldn't help being anxious, pointed at Shang Yuan and said, "Then do you know who he is?"

Yang Yixin said, "Shangyuan."

Gu Youguang is even more depressed, why can't he remember him, but remember Shang Yuan?What about my brother?

After seeing enough of Gu Youguang's depressed look, Shang Yuan came to rescue him and said, "This is your distant cousin named Gu Youguang."

"Where did my cousin come from?" Yang Yixin asked.

"Far Fang, it's normal not to know each other."

"Oh. Then why is my cousin here?"

"He came to see you."

"Thank you, I'm fine."

They talked to each other, but Gu Youguang didn't say a word, so depressed that he wanted to turn around and leave.

After amnesia, Yang Yixin was polite and had nothing to say to Gu Youguang.Gu Youguang had no choice but to pull Shang Yuan out of the ward again, and said, "If you don't help him recover his memory, do you still want to lie to him?"

Shang Yuan said: "It's fine now, without the pain of those nine years, he is very happy now."

"How do you know that he only has pain?" Gu Youguang said: "He just got out of the pain and became stronger and stronger. That is his real life."

"Torturing by ptsd and after-effects of a car accident, I would rather he had not experienced this kind of life." Shang Yuan said: "If life could be repeated, I would lie to him for the rest of his life and give him a carefree life forever."

"You...!" Gu Youguang stared at him, and after a while, he didn't argue any more, just let out a cold snort, and left without saying a word.

Standing at the door of the ward, Shang Yuan looked at Yang Yixin who was on the bed, but his heart was not so firm, instead he felt an inexplicable tingling pain.

That night, Shang Yuan received an email from Gu Youguang, which contained two videos.

When Yang Yixin fell asleep, he hesitated for a long time, and finally clicked on the first video.

The screen shook for a moment, and Yang Yixin appeared in the camera.

The video is a collection of episodes of plays that Yang Yixin has participated in. On the stage and under the spotlight, Yang Yixin's every move and vivid expression on his face are very clear.

In the beginning, he only played a small guest role, and there were about a dozen very short clips. In the video, his movements were a little cramped, as if he was on stage for the first time, and his movements were a bit stiff.

Shang Yuan looked at his youthful appearance, and a novel and brand-new perspective was opened.He saw Yang Yixin, who had just entered the drama industry, so nervous that he couldn't help but sweat.

But as time progresses, Yang Yixin's acting is getting better and better, and the roles he plays are becoming more and more important, with various occupations, personalities, and even scenes where he plays a female role.

Slowly, as soon as he appeared, there would be warm applause from the auditorium.Everyone is looking forward to his appearance, and perhaps many people come just for him.

He clearly said that he doesn't like acting, but Shang Yuan watched his every curtain call, from the expressionless face at the beginning to the smiling face at the end, the changes are amazing.

The play really changed Yang Yixin.Shang Yuan realized this for the first time.

After watching this video, Shang Yuan paused for a while, then clicked on the second video.

These are some daily shooting records of the Three Shadows Troupe, all of which have been edited by Gu Youguang, so only the clips about Yang Yixin remain.

At the beginning of the video, Yang Yixin was arranging the stage props, with a thin back, doing his work in silence.The moment he turned around, that thin face and those pair of lifeless eyes flickered in front of the camera.

Shang Yuan's heart tightened instantly.The Yang Yixin in his memory had never been so gloomy, he was a completely different person from the past.

Immediately afterwards, the video skipped to the dinner party, where everyone chatted together, and Yang Yixin sat in the corner, held up his wine glass, and drank one glass after another in silence, drifting away from the lively crowd, as if he were a different kind of person.

This state continued for a while. I don't know when it started. Maybe Gu Youguang always deliberately brought the topic to him, maybe everyone in the troupe took good care of him, and he slowly chatted with everyone. The gloom in the world also fades away day after day, and the smile quietly emerges.

In the process of growing up, the wounds in the heart are difficult to heal, and the healing process is long and painful.

Shang Yuan almost couldn't stand it for a few times, because he saw that Yang Yixin, who had grown up hard, was not by his side when he needed company and protection most.

It wasn't just about growing up. He struggled out of the shadow of ptsd and car accidents, and turned into an actor step by step. This was a grand and extremely painful rebirth.

Gu Youguang was really ruthless, using these two videos to stimulate him.

He masochistically watched the video over and over again, engraving Yang Yixin at every stage in his heart, letting himself experience the unforgettable pain.The time of his absence can never be looked back, but it is also an important part of Yang Yixin's life.

When it was dawn, Shang Yuan turned off the video, and his heart was already shaken.

He thought that he was absolutely not qualified to obliterate Yang Yixin's past, or distort his life without authorization.