Panda goes down the mountain

The Panda Demon will never sell his body!

Acid and He murmured something on his shoulder about "My True Friend", Yuanzhou ignored it and turned his attention back to his phone.

The current hot search No. 20 is #直人主门直播中睡目病失明#, and it is climbing up at a fast speed.

Although most of the water friends in the live broadcast room did not record the screen, one of them happened to have a home monitor facing the computer, and the whole process of "is it true or not" growing the right eye was captured by the monitor.

Of course, the attitude of most people is still——"P's, right?" There are four anchors of the same type in the first [-] articles, and it’s a bit miserable for everyone to bump into people.”

"Huh?" Yuanzhou saw the phrase "four identical anchors", and was a little curious. He followed the trending searches one by one, and saw a few items that had just been suppressed by the "true or false" trending search. ——

#Weasel demon live transformation! #

#Squirrel demon live transformation! #

And, #cauliflower snake demon transforms live! #

In the video, the monsters smiled ferociously under the camera, and then their bodies collapsed, their bones deformed, and they turned into animal forms in front of everyone. The misunderstood Minister Wang apologizes!"

In this regard, the comments below the social media are very consistent——

"This special effect is well done, please follow this standard for all future domestic fairy tales?"

The producer of the domestic fairy tale drama: "..."

Of course, there are also some people who have a different opinion: "The expression of the weasel demon is wrong, right? It doesn't reflect the insidious and cunning characteristics of the weasel at all, bad review!"

"The squirrel demon is too careless. The eyes of mice in reality are much smaller than this. I suggest that the production team go back to supplement the biology."

"The cauliflower snake is even more outrageous. Have you ever seen such a fat cauliflower snake? Cauliflower tube?"

"Uh..." The three monsters who followed the instructor's order to make trouble on the Internet were furious when they saw these comments, especially the cauliflower snake. She removed her jaw with a "crack" and opened her mouth so that it could swallow a car. : "Don't stop me! I'm going to eat these gangsters!"

Fat snakes also have dignity!

In short, although the special effects of the video are quite exquisite, and the performances of the actors are quite apt (serious) and (horrific), most people still regard them as a step for Minister Wang to find for himself in order to come back.

As for the fact that the steps are unscientific...

Everyone knows that there are rumors that Minister Wang himself suffers from a serious mental illness, and it is easy to lose control if he does not make frequent calls.

Minister Wang took the blame and resigned a few days ago, also using the phrase "relapse of old illness".

For a poor, near-retirement, balding mental patient, netizens are willing to save him a pair of underwear, so he is not discussed much.

"Damn it!" A cup was thrown to the ground and shattered.

The owner of the cup is the legendary Minister Wang who should be shocked. He said to the statue, "Didn't you say that you can clear my name? Why? Why is no one believing it?!"

"Don't worry," the person opposite the statue comforted him calmly: "Maybe these monsters are too common, and they can't make any big moves except for transforming."

"Then arrange for them to go to the busy city to transform! Go to the subway station, train station, and commercial plaza in the city center! Wherever there are many people, go there!"

The black hand behind the scenes: "Are you sure you won't be treated as a 3D real magic show?"

Minister Wang: "..."

It is too difficult to prove the existence of monsters in a high-tech world.

"To put it bluntly, the monsters we have are not rare enough." The man behind the scenes gave a sweet date with a stick: "Well, I recently got an interesting piece of news. It’s okay, take someone to see the situation, it’s best to rub the seal rune down——Fei Yi was born, and the land is thousands of miles away, such a large-scale drought, how many times there are more, those foolish people can’t believe it.”

"Okay." Minister Wang agreed, and he checked on his mobile phone: "Where is Shaohua Mountain? Why isn't it on the map?"

"That's an ancient saying. Now it should be 400 miles southwest of Daqing Mountain. I'll send you the location."

When Minister Wang checked the location, he asked casually: "Daqingshan... I heard that there is a panda there that has become a spirit. This kind of first-level protected animal should be very useful, right? Why don't you bring it into our organization?"

The man behind the scenes: "Panda Jing is lazy and can't fight. He is good-for-nothing except cute and popular. What's more...how can we persuade Panda Jing to join the organization? Don't forget about the white lion."

Minister Wang: "..."

He had heard this rumor. It was said that a white lion imported from Siam had enlightened its spirituality a few years ago, so the evil demon organization sent people to persuade it to join.

The white lion raised his head lazily from the lawn and said, "Let me ask first, what is the goal of your organization?"

The field mouse demon sent to join: "Down with human beings and establish a new society ruled by the demon clan!"

The white lion licked its paw: "Not interested."

It analyzed to the vole demon: "I eat imported snowflake steaks, drink pure natural and pollution-free mountain spring water, have ice cubes to cool down in summer, and a warm nest in winter, and there are dedicated people to groom and entertain me. Hundreds of lion girls carefully selected from all over the country can go on blind dates, and when the cubs are born, humans will help me raise them."

"These were brought to me by humans. If there were no humans, would you monsters grow food? Breed animals? Build air conditioners, refrigerators, and TVs?"

The vole demon was stunned: "We can enslave humans to do this!"

The white lion looked at it speechlessly: "Aren't I enslaving humans now?"

So why take off your pants and fart-it's superfluous.

Vole demon: "..."

Before it could speak, the white lion had already used up its waking hours for today. It yawned, pressed the vole monster to the ground with one paw, and roared angrily.

Seeing this, the breeder who came to clean the white lion's cage with a bucket rushed forward, picked up the lion's paw, and threw it out by the tail of the vole demon.

"Xueshan, good boy, don't eat such unclean things. Your dinner today is fresh leg of lamb from the Hulunbeier Prairie, and goat's milk as an extra meal!"

The dizzy vole demon: "..." Day!

From that day on, all the members of the Demon Organization understood that protecting animals has class conflicts with them, and they are enemies that cannot be united!

When Minister Wang thought of this, he gave up the plan to absorb the panda demon into the organization. He also knew that the white lion had been served like a local emperor, and the panda demon would only get more than it, not less.

"If you don't join, don't join... Anyway, it's just a bunch of cannon fodder." Minister Wang said disdainfully: "Okay, I'll buy a plane ticket to Shaohua Mountain now, don't forget to help me clean up."

"No problem, I still have a lot of monster videos here, all of which are posted on the Internet, and someone will always believe it."

……

"Sure enough, you hit the spot." Gu Qingqu sat side by side with Yuanzhou to watch trending searches, and Zuo Wen's voice came from his own mobile phone.

He said: "The higher-ups called and asked us if we want to cancel the trending search."

"No need." Gu Qing channeled: "The truth is about to be announced——as planned."

"Okay." Zuo Wen said bluntly: "I used to wonder if it would be too early to announce the recovery of spiritual energy, but you are wise in the end—you know, there have been a lot of werewolves in America who have awakened recently, and after transforming I bought the gun for zero yuan in the store, and the video was shot on the spot and posted online. Now the Internet has gone crazy. It’s also the same in Europe. I heard that a vampire crawled out of the coffin under the church and claimed to be Wa Vlad III of the Principality of Lachia is currently engaged in restoration, and there are quite a few people who support it. The group of onmyojis in the Wa Kingdom are also restless. They always borrow ancient books from the Jiang Kingdom in the name of cultural exchanges. I doubt that they want to copy hundreds of books. Ghost Night Walking... If we don't move faster, we may be caught off guard by foreigners flying dragons."

After Gu Qingqu listened patiently, he said "Yes" to indicate that he understood.

Hearing that he was so calm, Zuo Wen immediately felt relieved: "But the above are all small scenes. If you really want to fight for the cultural heritage, who can compete with our Jiangguo? Not to mention anything else, isn't there one who has awakened now? Lord Mountain God? And "Shan Hai Jing", even if only [-]% of the ingredients in it are true, it can kill Dracula and werewolves in seconds, right?"

"No, I have to carefully plan the consecration ceremony of the mountain temple. This is the first step of Jiangguo's practice interface to the world. It must not be messed up! Just do as we said, use the panda demon as an ordinary person to be friendly with the practice world. A bridge of communication...Which video is better to be accepted first?"

Gu Qingqu: "Your mobile phone is on, I will pass it to you."

He didn't shy away from Yuanzhou, and quickly uploaded more than a dozen videos to Zuo Wen's account.

#Panda Playing Water#

#Panda Eating Melon Seeds#

#猫熊猫erlang#

#猫熊为山神寺守工#

The pandas in the video act like humans, especially when they are supervisors, with their hands behind their backs and hard hats, and the way they point and point at the little brick worker Lili from time to time, they are very bully.

Yuanzhou: "..."

He stared at Gu Qingqu calmly——when did you secretly take pictures?Excessive!Sue you for infringement of portrait rights!

……

In this day and age, sucking pandas to decompress has become a living habit of some people. Even ordinary panda videos have a large number of followers every day, not to mention such a vivid wild panda monster.

After Zuo Wen uploaded the panda video on social media using the pornographic account "The Only Designated Mountain Temple in Daqingshan", it really attracted a lot of attention.

[Whether you believe it or not, this time I believe that there are really monsters in the world-I really want to ruarua the belly of the panda monster! 】

[Hurry up and send Gun Gun to school!Don't delay and get rolling! 】

【No!Raise funds to send rolling debut!Let those shameless fans see what a real national idol is! 】

The last comment was quickly popular because it met the enthusiastic needs of the masses, and everyone said——

[I like to watch Gun Gun even if I eat and drink. Of course, it would be even better if I could live-stream singing and dancing rap. 】

[Faith girl is willing to support Gun Gun with all her family's wealth, and it's easy to vote for support! 】

[I hope that the official will take into account the requirements of our enthusiastic netizens, and give more opportunities to positive energy idols like Gun Gun, and don't be ignorant of praise. 】

If these comments were fanatical with a touch of normality, then the next video released by a certain self-media completely promoted Yuanzhou to the status of a national idol, and it became popular all over the Internet, and everyone knew it.

The name of the video is very long -

"shock!The recipient of the special state allowance broke into the villagers' homes overnight, and did such a beastly thing to the babies carefully raised by the villagers! "

Seeing this video appearing under the topic of #猫熊成fine#, the people who eat melons were confused at first. Seeing the literal meaning, shouldn’t it appear on social channels?

When they clicked on the content of the video with doubts in their hearts, they laughed like crazy——

[On how the literal prison was formed. 】

[Gun Gun: Injustice! 】

[The blogger teacher wanted to quit the literary world back then, and I disagreed.Without your existence, how many unjust, false and wrongly decided cases would there be in the world? 】

The reason for this kind of reaction is that the 43-character long title can be summed up in four words - Panda Catch Chicken!

Or the panda eats the chicken, or the panda beats the chicken.

A week ago in Yuanzhou, the scene of beating Jinji in Xiaoshan Village was photographed by many villagers and posted on the Internet.

However, because everyone has little shooting experience, the angles they choose are not good, and they are all personal accounts, they have not attracted much attention.

Until now, this blogger has a discerning eye.

He carefully found all the live videos, re-edited them, made a soundtrack, and added a thrilling commentary, authentically recreating the whole process of the first-level protected animals beating the second-level protected animals.

Even more coincidentally, someone found out——[This is not the enthusiasm of the demon panda, this is the demon panda. Look, there is a curly bunch of hair on the demon panda's ass! 】

Countless netizens held a lantern to visit the rolling butt, and finally confirmed: "It's true!"

[Contemporary Sherlock Holmes. 】

Some even chased after the account of "The Only Designated Mountain Temple in Daqingshan" and asked if they could sell the surroundings of Panda PP, such as mouse pads and pillows.

Zuo Wen: "The specific situation needs to be discussed with the panda involved. We will announce the final result at the opening ceremony of the Mountain Temple on June 6. Friends who are interested in buying please continue to follow this account, and the Mountain Temple will be consecrated at that time During the live broadcast, lucky viewers will be selected to have face-to-face communication with Gungun, and there will also be Daqingshan keychains, panda autographed photos, mountain god blessing charms and other gifts."

"June 6st, Daqingshan, we will see you there!"

After typing this line, Zuo Wen was very satisfied to see the rocket-like growth of attention—the consecration ceremony was stable, and his KPI had also been completed.

I seem to have forgotten something?

Oh yes, Zuo Wen took out his mobile phone and sent Gu Qingqu a message——

"Brother, it's up to you to deal with the panda monster! You can do it!"

Gu Qingqu: "..."

Yuanzhou was right next to him, and he saw the whole process of the two sending messages and communicating, seeing that they were going to sell their PP for the consecration ceremony, his face was blushing for a long time, and finally he said: "It's unsightly! "

"Insulting Sven!"

"Sell, sell friends for glory!"

"The panda demon will never sell his body!"

Gu Qingqu: "..."

This task seems a bit daunting.

Even so, Zuo Wen's starting point is not wrong, and the way of selling merchandise is also good for the panda itself, so Gu Qingqu didn't give up so easily.

——Yuanzhou was originally supposed to be a mountain god, but now he can only transform into a panda demon. Presumably there is a mistake in his cultivation, and the power of faith is indispensable for the cultivation of a mountain god. If this method can help him recover, why not?

Times have changed, and mountain gods don't have to rely on believers. Sometimes the beliefs of fans are also very firm.

As a mountain god thousands of years ago, Wonju is still too conservative.

In the next few days, Gu Qingqu thought of many kinds of explanations and made countless promises, but none of them made Yuanzhou let go. Even the date every morning fell through. Can't come out of the woods.

Gu Qingqu thought and thought, and finally made up his mind, and knocked on Yuanzhou's door one evening with a bag of beer.

The next day, Zuo Wen looked at the measurement data he brought, and said in surprise: "With yours, it's still a 1:1 modeling, now the factory can start working!"

"Hey, by the way, how did you let the panda demon let go?"

Gu Qingqu took a deep breath and touched his eye circles with his hands. Even though the ice was applied all night, there was still some faint pain.

He said, "Stop talking."

Forget the past.

The author says:

Gun Gun: I became popular, but also died;

Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!