very close to the clouds

During Shen Yanbai's ten days in Zhiduo, Jiang Zhongyu was not absent for a single day.

Sometimes it was early in the morning, sometimes in the evening, he could always see that familiar figure from the crowd, wearing a hat and a mask, thinking that Shen Yanbai would not be able to see him when he was hiding behind the crowd, but in fact Shen Yanbai would always be able to see him in the first place. Captured the opponent's figure for a while.

They didn't say anything to each other, Jiang Zhongyu just watched in silence, and Shen Yanbai was just watched in silence.

On Zhiduo's last day of filming, Jiang Zhongyu did not come.

The sun was particularly strong that day, the ice and snow melted, and the temperature was frighteningly cold. It only started to warm up in the afternoon. After filming the last scene of Zhiduo, the crew temporarily closed their work. Xue Zhen said that most of the time when the group took a day off Everyone dispersed, only Shen Yanbai was sitting on the chair of the crew and slowly packing up his things.

Li Yi lowered his voice and said, "I don't seem to see Brother Jiang today."

Shen Yanbai said: "I'm not waiting for him."

Li Yi pursed his lips, and said with a look of being too lazy to expose him: "I heard that there will be a meteor shower tonight. There is a best viewing spot about a kilometer ahead from here."

"Boring." Shen Yanbai stuffed everything into the bag, and threw the bag to Li Yi, "Go back."

During this day's vacation, he didn't have any other ideas, he probably just lay down in the room.

After eight o'clock in the evening, at Li Yi's strong request, the two went out to watch the meteor shower together.

There were quite a lot of people on the street, but after leaving the city, it seemed deserted, especially the place where the filming was still busy in the afternoon was deserted at the moment, and the tents and everything hadn't been cleaned up yet, so it was empty and desolate.

When passing by the venue, Shen Yanbai saw a man smoking a cigarette standing behind the tent.

Li Yi also saw it: "It seems to be Brother Jiang. He really didn't miss a day in ten days, but it's a pity that today's filming is over."

Shen Yanbai stood there for a long time.

Li Yi asked him, "Why don't you go and have a look?"

"Forget it." Shen Yanbai said, "Let's go."

He forced himself to look back and continue walking towards the best viewing spot for meteors.Shen Yanbai was sure that Jiang Zhongyu knew he was coming, because when the two of them stopped, Jiang Zhongyu turned sideways, obviously looking this way.

Li Yi said a little loudly: "But we are leaving tomorrow."

Shen Yan gave him a white look, thinking he was talkative.

But Li Yi's talkativeness this time got a good result, because Shen Yanbai heard Jiang Zhongyu behind him suddenly calling him: "Xiao Shen."

Shen Yanbai stopped naturally.

"Let's chat." Jiang Zhongyu said.

Li Yi went to the shooting star viewing point first, and Shen Yanbai turned around and walked towards Jiang Zhongyu.The location of Jiangzhong Islet is somewhat hidden. Behind the tent, there is a large piece of grass, and behind the grass there is a small hillside. After passing the hillside, there is a large piece of wilderness with a wide view. It is endless, and no one can be found.

There was no light here, but Shen Yanbai could see Jiang Zhongyu's tired face clearly through the moonlight.He couldn't help but wonder what Jiang Zhongyu was up to during this time.

It was Jiang Zhongyu who spoke first, and he asked him, "Have you considered it?"

Shen Yanbai was immediately aroused from the initial anger, sneered, and said, "What are you thinking about?"

Jiang Zhongyu looked at him sideways, and said slowly, "Our relationship."

"Do you still need to think about it?" Shen Yanbai also knew that what he said at the moment was a bit harsh, but he really couldn't bear it, and the words just ran out of his mouth involuntarily, "Didn't we break up already?"

Jiang Zhongyu froze for a moment, and the expression on his face also froze.

Shen Yanbai stared at every subtle movement on his face, as if he wanted to see him clearly and clearly.

"Xiao Shen, I...didn't mean that at the time." Jiang Zhongyu sighed helplessly, "I was too busy with things, and at that time the Internet was full of your black material. I was afraid of dragging you down, so I said That kind of words."

Shen Yanbai took out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and lit one.

Smoke spewed out from his mouth, Shen Yanbai's face became more blurred in the darkness, people's voices could be heard in the distance, but the distance was too far, so it was not very clear.

The two were silent for a long time.

The sound of the wind brought meteors, and Shen Yanbai saw one flying across the sky in the distance, lighting up the dark blue sky for a moment.

"Make a wish." Jiang Zhongyu said, "Making a wish on a shooting star is the most effective."

Shen Yanbai bit the butt of his cigarette and closed his eyes.When he opened his eyes again, he found that Jiang Zhongyu was looking at him tenderly.

He asked, "You didn't agree?"

"I don't need it." Jiang Zhongyu touched his head and said, "The wish is right in front of you."

Shen Yanbai took down the burnt cigarette butt and looked at him: "Jiang Zhongyu, don't you think you need to explain to me?"

He didn't specify what he wanted to explain, but Jiang Zhongyu understood his meaning almost instantly: "I didn't want to hide it from you, but there are some things that come to my lips, but I just can't say them."

"Why did you go to jail?"

"Over-defense." Jiang Zhongyu said, "You also know about Cangla. In order to save her, I accidentally...that person was not rescued, so he was sentenced."

Jiang Zhongyu frowned and clenched his fists tightly. He seemed to recall some bad scene, so he said every word with great effort: "I never thought of killing anyone. Since I was young, I I have never lost a fight, and every time I help others, so I never thought that helping others will actually help people die."

His expression was struggling and uneasy, he didn't even dare to look at Shen Yanbai, as if he was waiting for a trial: "If you really mind, insist on breaking up..."

But Shen Yanbai interrupted him and asked, "Are you afraid? At that time."

Jiang Zhongyu was stunned for a moment, and then said: "Of course I was afraid. I don't remember clearly. Every time I think about it later, my memory will automatically fill in that scene. I always feel that he was covered in blood at that time."

"When I was in prison, I also felt scared. In the first year or two, I couldn't even sleep at night, and I always dreamed of him. Later, I started to read Buddhist scriptures, which made me feel better." Jiang Zhongyu lowered his eyes and said stiffly, " I rarely dream about it now."

Shen Yanbai first covered the back of his hand with his own palm.

The warm palm restrains all the fear and uneasiness, and sends a little bit of warmth that is rare tonight to the eyes.

Jiang Zhongyu turned his head to the side, and looked at him deeply as if he couldn't believe it.

"I'm afraid too." Shen Yanbai said, "It was like this when my mother died. The wound on her stomach kept bleeding out. No matter how I tried to block it with my hands, I couldn't stop it. I watched her die angry..."

Probably brought back bad memories, Jiang Zhongyu straightened his back, and said with a strong sense of substitution: "Sorry."

"Why do you blame yourself?" Shen Yanbai said, "You are not the one who did wrong and bad things. There is no need to use other people's sins to demand your own atonement."

"But...he lost his life because of me."

"Jiang Zhongyu, when will you be able to live a little more selfishly?" Shen Yanbai asked him seriously, "Not for others, but only for yourself."

Jiang Zhongyu lowered his head, stared at the gravel on the ground, and said after a long while, "Do you not mind?"

"What do you mind?"

"I've been in prison."

Shen Yanbai seemed to have figured something out at this moment, and at the same time regretted it a bit. The words he said openly in front of Jiang Zhongyu before turned into hard thorns and pierced deeply into his heart .

It is said that those who do not know are not guilty, but at this moment Shen Yanbai is not willing to forgive himself.

He turned sideways, hugged Jiang Zhongyu's shoulders, and whispered, "It's not your fault."

"I only regret not telling you earlier," Shen Yanbai said softly but firmly, "You did nothing wrong."

The author says:

Come on!